Summary: Nanami helps you when your knitting project is not coming along.
Notes: sfw, fluff, gender-neutral! reader, established relationship, pet names (sweetheart), pep talk kinda off deal, not proofread.
A/N: yeah, well, i couldn't get the handle on this tutorial. so i am taking my frustrations out on this. i love knitting but i hate not getting it on the first try, sucks to suck. anyways, i know this is a different tone from how we are all acting with Nanami after this week's episodes, so sorry. But hey, we get fluff, that's always good since...you know...sorry.
"I don't know what I am doing." You groan, putting down the needles after what seemed like a mess in your hands.
You know how to knit. Well, know enough stitches to get by when doing granny squares and scarfs. That alone lets you do plenty of things but you want to push yourself and do something new. Somehow you landed on a shawl, something light to cover you on breezy days, something simple—not complicated. Spoiler, it was complicated.
You got circular needles like the ones in the tutorial you watched and decided to start working on your project as soon as you got home. Which leads us to this moment. You sitting on the couch after god knows how many tries of doing the first row alone, each with its own challenge. The thread comes loose and you have to start over. Or you get lost in how fast the lady in the video seemed to go, even if you slowed it down to 0.5. Or when you managed to get to another row, the thread balled together like a lump.
It was frustrating. All this trial and error led to minimal but insignificant changes each time, which didn't feel fair. You were paying attention but it seemed your hands couldn't make what the video showed you. It made you feel ridiculous that you even thought you could do a shawl. It was humiliating.
Ever the most attentive boyfriend, Nanami picked up on your frustration growing as he heard you sigh and repeat the last 10 seconds of the video. When he saw you drop the needles onto your lap and leaned back on the couch with your head thrown back, he knew it was a sign for him to put down the newspaper and intervene.
"You're getting there, you just-"
"If you say 'be patient' I'm going to lose it." You interrupted him with a warning.
Nanami sighed, turning his body to face yours as you two seat on the couch. He takes a look on your face and sees that your frustration is more than just being annoyed at your project not coming along—but also disappointment. Your pout told him that much as you started to detangle the little thread you managed to knit reluctantly.
"I know it's the last thing I should be saying, but it's true. This is different from what you usually do, you have to give yourself some time to grasp it." He says, mustering a gentle tone to avoid making you feel as if he's patronizing you.
You turn your head to look at him, cheek squeezed by the couch as your face betrays you, showing him you were growing insecure about your skills. It made his heart crack just a little when he saw that glint missing from your eye when you first sat down to knit.
"I don't want to just make simple things like boring scarves or useless squares." You admitted softly, your hands fidgeting with your yarn.
Nanami places a hand around you, pulling you close to him for a much-needed break from what was stressing you. It was ironic that the thing you did for fun and helped you unwind was making you feel like this. He took one of your hands and started massaging your palm, soothing the muscles that were starting to feel sore over the needles. It made your brows relax at the feeling.
"Then don't. You are already doing something different."
"Yeah, and it's looking like just tangled yarn. I don't know, it's just..." you sigh, placing your head on your shoulder. "it's not looking like that," you added, pointing at the screen that was displaying a pale pink shawl flawlessly done.
"Sweetheart." He called out, holding your hand into his and squeezing it gently. He could see you were getting in your head and he needed you to get out of there. "You're just starting this, they probably have done this a million times and have messed up before. It doesn't have to look perfect on your first try."
He was right but his words weren't on the nail just yet. You know that the first won't be perfect. But why weren't you able to get it yet? You were struggling with the first steps and it made you feel as if you were the worst knitter in history. You start to wonder how the heck you even managed to knit other stuff before.
Nanami calls your name gently, caressing your arm softly to bring you back to the same place you two were. You look at his eyes, slightly moving your head on your shoulder to look comfortably at him as he speaks.
"How it looks shouldn't matter as long as you're having fun. It doesn't matter if it looks like or better than the tutorial if it makes you feel like this. You should knit because you like knitting."
His motherly tone warms your heart and it makes you smile. Even if your chest is still heavy with disappointment, his words made you remember why you even took knitting as a hobby. It wasn't because you were thinking of it as some revenue or something to show off, it was because it relaxed you. The end products were just extras.
"Besides," he adds as he pulls you closer to him with a squeeze at your arm, "I love those scarves you make, especially the one you gave me at our anniversary."
He wasn't just saying it to make you feel better. The things you made may take time and may be quite simple, but they were made by you. You and you alone added that extra warmth on the scarves and projects you made with those squares that made them extra cozy. He loves it even more knowing you made a scarf for him and him alone.
"You don't care that the things I made are boring?" You ask, your tone already becoming much more content and softer.
He shakes his head. "If they are boring, then why do I love them so much?"
Your heart softens up, smiling lovingly at him as you lift your head off his shoulder and press a kiss on his cheek. It makes him hum, his hand roaming down to the curve of your back as he keeps you close.
"Thank you, honey." You say as you return to your previous position with your back against the couch. This time, rather than slouching, you are sitting much straighter with a more confident attitude.
"Anything for my favorite knitter." He hums, quickly returning the kiss by pressing his lips on your temple.
You chuckled, feeling the motivation you needed back into your being. You take a big breath before taking back the needles and repeating the first step for the nth time. It's still frustrating that it takes you quite a few times to get a single step right. But the way Nanami rubs the small of your back even as he continues to read his newspaper is enough to keep you calm and try again.
Is it just me or is everyone around the world suffering so much from the soon-to-be-here exam season that even tumblr has started suggesting motivational quotes?
GUYS IM LITERALLT SHITTING MYSELD MY DENTIST THOUGHT I WAS A BOY (in like a cis guy way)
BUTBRO I WAS IN A SKIRT AND LOOKED VERY FEMININE (imo) IM GOING TO FUCKIN CRY
RANDOM DENTIST WHO TOLD ME I HAVE 2 CAVITYS I LOVE U <333
