#( please read )

[acepumpkinpatrick]

Y'all!!! Emergency!!!

Your Esims are also helping Palestinians in Jenin!!

Instructions & Discount codes

Truly Esim

Thank you @anneemay for the notice

[stardog-howls]

Queer. Disabled. In Desperate Need Of Help.

My fiance was fired from their job and I am disabled and currently fighting for disability between appointments with pain management and neurosurgery. We desperately need money to feed us, our cats, and have gas to get me to and from doctors appointments. There's a bony growth near my brain, y'all, I might end up needing surgery to remove it, on top of the other shit wrong with me. Any help is appreciated.

My fiance is looking for a job. I have upcoming appointments with a neurologist and a neurosurgeon. Appointments with doctors assigned to me by Social Security. Lawyers for my disability claim. We are just trying to survive through it.

paypal.me/gradyyy

Venmo: @GradyyyyK

Wishlist for cat supplies.

[lolwealldie]

a scene draw from Emotional Support Turtle on AO3

i liked the sketch for this better but i spent far too long coloring this not to include it 🫠

[shecrabonmyrangtiligoon]

ℍ𝕒𝕧𝕖 𝕐𝕠𝕦 𝔼𝕧𝕖𝕣?

pairing: bsf!reader, bsf!chris, cocky!chris,

-warnings: making out, dry humping, semi smut

might make a part two lemme know :)

“How the fuck is he in the black hole?”, Chris said

“He just is. idk man i’ve never been in one”, you replied

“damn, i forgot”, chris laughs

“just watch the movie bro”

Tonight was you and Chris’ movie night and you had practically begged him to watch Interstellar. He watched for the most part, but you would occasionally catch him looking at you.

Chris has always been your one friend that you could do anything around. He would go in the dressing room when you guys went shopping, slept in the same bed and cuddled during sleepovers, he would even be in the bathroom while you showered. None of your other friends did these things with you. You’ve always wondered if it was because he might have liked you. And of course you wished that was true, it’s hard not to like Chris. But right now you weren’t thinking about that.

Right now, you and chris were laying on his bed, laying close next to each other, you legs crossed over one another. You tried to focus on the movie, but couldn’t help but notice Chris moving his head every few minutes to look at you.

He did it again. For the last time

You paused the movie and looked at him.

“Is something wrong? You keep looking at me.”, You finally asked

He faced you, slight grin on his face

“I’m fine”

Accepting the answer you grabbed the remote to the resume the movie-

“It’s just…”

“What?”

“Have you ever kissed someone before?”

You told him no. In all honesty you didn’t think anyone found you attractive enough.

“I’ve just been thinking about it lately and since you haven’t, ca i be your first?”

“Why me?”

“Why not you?”

“I don’t know, I just feel like I’m not the type of person you’d want to kiss. You know? Like pretty”

“You? Not pretty? Are you serious? Now would a perfect time for a mirror because you’re fucking gorgeous.”

“Thanks”, You said shyly, not knowing what to reply with

“I could teach you how. We’ll take it slow and everything”

You agreed to this. Now Chris was slightly leaned over you. You feel his warm lips slowly moving with yours. This is unreal. You had been dreaming of this since forever and now it’s finally happening. Wanting more, you pushed your head more into his, fighting for dominance. You also sped up the kiss and at this point, your guys’ tongues were colliding as well. You shouldn’t have gotten too excited while being this inexperienced. You bit his lip. He pulled away and chuckled a little bit

“Careful baby”

He grabbed your chin and started kissing you again. And you bit him again. Shit

He pulled away again.

“I’m so sorry Chris, I’m not trying to I swear” you start babbling

He just looks at you and smiles. This is definitely the end. You think he’ll never want to do this again until he breaks the silence and says

“Have you ever kissed someone’s neck before?”

“Umm no?”

“Do you wanna try it?”

“Sure”

“Come sit on my lap”

He leans against the bed frame as you climb on top of him. You hover him, not wanting to put your full body weight on him. He grabs your hips and pull you all the way down against him. He gives you a look of approval and you start kissing his neck. With your hand on the other side of his neck, your tongue and mouth work together kissing and sucking the flesh. Chris leans his head back in pleasure.

“Can i touch you?”

He sees your nod and moves his right hand to your hip and his left to your mid back. He pulls you closer, you suck harder, he’s falling apart.

“Fuck, baby, you’ve never done this before?”

“Promise I haven’t”

You start to lean in towards his neck again when he stops you. He’s giving you that look again.

“Have you ever had anyone kiss you right here?”, he puts his hand on your chest.

You shake your head no

“Can i be the first?”

Desperate for his touch, “Please”

You eagerly lift up your shirt revealing your black lacy bra.

“So beautiful. So perfect”, He cups your boobs and slightly squeezes them. Pulling down your bra ever so slightly he attaches his mouth to your left boob. Kissing and swirling his tongue around your nipple, you let out small moans and whimpers. Your sounds are music to his ears. He can’t get enough. While moving to your other boob, he presses the left one with his palm. The way his warm mouth feels against you has you falling apart in his lap. His hand snakes around you grip your ass while pulling you closer, pulling you more into his mouth. He slowly moves from your boobs to your neck and up to your lips, giving them a small peck. You look at him confused. Why’d he stop?

“Have you ever dry humped someone before”

Is he serious?

“Alright, you know I haven’t”, you laugh a little

Gaining more confidence, “Can we?”

Chris doesn’t hesitate before flipping you under him.

“You nervous?”

“A little”, you admit

“Don’t be. I’m gonna make you feel so good baby.”

He kisses you tenderly before moving his hips against yours. The feeling is euphoric. Your sleep shorts had been thin so you’re feeling everything. Chris grinds into your hips, slowly but deep, enough to have you whimpering and wet.

“Oh my god, Chris”

“I know baby”, he brushes your cheek and kisses your neck

As if it were possible, Chris moves closer to you. He continuously rubs up against your clit at just the right angle, making you arch into him. You can feel his length against you, He’s unbelievably huge. Taking a risk, you wrap your legs around his waist. Safe to say he loved it. You can hear his groans against your neck as he moves against you.

“Fuck. You’re so fucking good. Gonna make me cum in my pants”

“Please don’t stop chris. Too good”

But he stops. Why does he keep stopping?

Flipping you back onto his lap, he looks at you again. First your eyes, then your lips, your boobs, and then moving down to your lap. He reaches inside your shorts and hooks onto the waistband of your panties. pulling them slightly out of your shorts. He looks at them and then looks back into your eyes. He smirks

“Have you ever…?”

a/n: let me know if i should make a part two!!!!! this is also my first time writing a chris fic so i hope it was alright. also not proofread

Part two???

yes 🙏🦾

ew wtf no. this is fucking terrible and you should never write again.

this is amazing and i’m in love with you 😘

Voting ended onMar 29

[lewlewlemon-44]

marked by the tide🌊

dilf!jake sully x reader

Summary: when you and Jake finally get some alone time without the kids, you use it to explore the newly discovered sea.. among other things along the way.

Tags: soft smut, missionary, fluff, y/n replaces Neytiri in this story, fingering, foreplay, cum-eating making out and basically just other sex things🌝 MDNI

A/n: so I’m writing a longer Jake fic rn but I just know it’s gonna take me a while because I have like no attention span- and I wanted to get a fic out tonight for you guys.. so here it is 🤍NOT PROOFREAD

You and Jake rarely got alone time, so when you did, it was highly cherished.

Like right now.

You’re both carefully walking along the beaches of Awa’atlu, the Metkayina island where Tonowari and Ronal had been so kind to let you stay for safety.

You both knew you needed a break like this, some time away in each others arms.

With kids like yours, it’s hard to even keep up. Especially when Neteyam and Lo’ak are getting into fights with the Olo’eyktan’s son.

But you really didn’t want to think about that right now, not while you and your mate are trying to get some peace.

Eventually you find a small cave near the coast, it’s warm and lit up with bioluminescence that only shows during eclipse.

Jake leads you in gently and you blush like you used to even back when you both first met.

“This is cool, right baby?” Jake says softly as he looks up at all of the plants and the scenery.

The waves gently crash against the sand, and creates a sensual atmosphere. Before you respond, you find yourself looking Jake up and down.

“Yeah.. this is incredible.” You agree with him. And try to ignore how hot he looks right now.

It’s like all of your senses have heightened, and your hyper aware of his abs, his v-line, his thick muscular thighs and biceps.

Eywa, he has just gotten even hotter in recent years. He really has aged like fine wine.

Jake seems to notice how you’re not even looking at the surroundings, and rather at him.

He smirks slightly before he brings you closer to him, his hand naturally snaking around your slim waist.

“I can tell that you’re not looking at the cave, paskalin.”

Your eyes darken with sudden attraction as he calls you out, and you let out a small laugh as you look down.

“How could you tell so quickly?” You ask before briefly looking up into his eyes.

He smirks before bringing his five fingered hand up to brush some of your hair behind you ear.

“I can always tell when you’re flustered baby, you don’t really hide it very well.”

You smile and shake your head, he knows you too well.

Jake face hovers above yours as his hand reaches down to softly grip your high, he hikes it up over his hip and you instinctively wrap your leg around his slutty waist.

His bare cock hangs heavy against his lower abdomen, hard and waiting.

But Jake is never the type of guy to just have sex only for his gain, he’s always a giver and loves to see you squirming in pleasure underneath him.

Your tweng is askew and you feel the cold breeze coming from the waves on your lower region.

Jake’s face lowers until his lips are against yours, and he mutters something.

“What do you want, baby? My fingers?”

You nod immediately and can’t find the strength to speak, you always feel weak and submissive when he speak to you in that tone.

He smirks before then kissing you, softly at first but he grows more confident and his tongue parts your lips- you don’t dare to stop him.

His hand creeps lower until he reaches the meeting of your thighs, his thumb runs down your slit and parts your lips to lightly ghost over that sensitive bundle of nerves.

Your hips suddenly buck up and you let out a sudden moan into his mouth. Your tongues swirl together as he fully presses his calloused thumb against your clit again.

He begins to circle it gently and you can’t help but break the kiss so you can tilt your head back and let out a loud high pitched moan that nearly echoes in the cave.

Jake takes the opportunity to move his lips to your exposed neck and begin to mark you with dark lovebites.

He then moves his other finger to gently circle your entrance. He then pushes it in, and quickly puts in a second before you can get used to his thick fingers.

You eyes roll back as he scissors them and pushes against that special spongey spot that he knows you love.

You hips buck again and continuous moans tumble from your lips.

Especially when his mouth reaches your breasts, and his lips are quick to latch onto one of your erect nipples and bite teasingly to test your reaction.

It just makes you moan and move one of your hands to the back of his head and push to make sure he doesn’t move.

His fingers eventually coax you to a climax and it hits hard, his lips leave your chest so he can kiss you against swallow the unholy level moans that leave you.

You arch into him, your breasts squeezing against his chest.

When he removes his fingers, he brings them to your mouth and you eagerly lick your own juices off of them.

Your eyes are wild with desire and pure ecstasy, and Jake feeds off of that.

He lets out a low groan as he moves to make his cock purposely grind against your slit, a vein catches on your still very sensitive clit.

You let out a gasp and jolt subconsciously.

You then feel his tip meeting your entrance,

“Please.. Jake please don’t tease me~” you let out a needy whine.

He then suddenly begins to push into you excruciatingly slowly and you push your hips up to make him be quicker.

When he finally bottoms out. You both have to take a deep breath before either one of you moves.

Even after 3 kids, you never get tired of how big his dick is.

You’re both absolutely spent.

You’re now gently laying on his chest, still both naked, and your thigh is draped over his hips.

Jake’s breaths are very deep, you can feel the rise and fall of his chest. You think he’s falling asleep, but you ache too much to care.

You ask him a mumbled question, and when he doesn’t respond, you realise he really is asleep.

And so you decide you might as well have a small nap too, you hoped nobody would find you two like this.

Your eyes eventually flutter shut, and you fall into a dream state, head against Jake’s chest and in the most comfortable position you would want to be in.

[caitsangel]

hoodie strings 𝜗ৎ

in which peter parker runs into lara jean in new york city during move in day, they collide and fall into each other arms. a love story of happening to meeting each other at the right time.

tags & warnings!: strangers to friends to lovers, characters are of age, MASSIVE yearning, mature language, miscommunication at some point, she falls first but he falls harder, some angst sorrrry, english major lara, engineer major peter, peter isn't spider man in this universe, didn't proofread whoops, slow burn, might missed some typos forgive me <3

chapters ♡ ⑅˚₊ one | incoming (loading)

word count: 1,659 !

Of course of all the things that could happen of course Lara Jean got lost.

She's been there for ten minutes and of course she got lost in New York City. After Lara Jean got off the plane after a very long ride from Portland, Oregon she couldn't contain her excitement. She was finally here. She wasn't sure of where she wanted to go to school, she wanted to follow her boyfriend, Peter Kavinsky to Stanford University but luckily her older sister Margot told her that decision was a bit unwise and she's ever so gracious she listened.

During prom night Lara and Peter got into a heated argument and had ended their relationship. Naturally Lara was devastated. They lasted all of high school and has been through so much together and for all of it to end just like that? Lara didn't even think she could be okay after all of that.

Through it all she was very grateful for her sister and her friends. After so many cries and so many tubs of ice cream she felt okay. Yes she misses Peter but it's just not meant to be. She can't spend her life missing him, he's not doing the same so why should she?

After searching frantically for her phone that was lost in her bag she found it. She needed to call her dad, Margot, and Kitty, but first she needs to figure out where the hell she was going.

Lara began to start walking hoping that the directions on her phone would start to make sense. Excitement began to fuel her in ways she couldn't describe. This is her start to something new. A new chapter in her life, nothing was going to get in her way.

Well something got in her way.

Lara collided with the ground and dropped her belongings everywhere. She's not even sure what happened but the pain that she felt in her head felt a little too intense for her liking. She opened her eyes in anger but unexpectedly the anger drifted away at the sound of a voice.

"I'm so so sorry!"

Lara opened her eyes, her vision blurred due to the massive headache that started to brew. Once it was settled she locked eyes upon by one of the cutest guys she's seen. The features that stood out to her the most was his floppy brown hair and the little twinkle he had in his eyes. Her eyes traveled down and saw he as well as her dropped all of his belongings as well.

"Let me help you!"

Lara pulled herself together to help the stranger with his things but he immediately stopped her, "No let me help you first."

He quickly grabbed her bag and her phone as well as other items, he placed them into his hands and then proceeded to pick up his own things. Lara was in awe with how sweet the guy was.

"Thank you so much, and I'm sorry it's my fault I should have paid attention to where I was going."

The stranger shook his head, "No it's my fault I wasn't looking where I was going as well."

Just as Lara was about to speak, he immediately looked stressed as he checked his phone, "Shit I'm gonna be late, I'm really sorry it was nice meeting you!" And with that he started to run away in the opposite direction.

He was too cute ..

Lara mentally cursed herself for not asking for his name sooner, accepting that they wouldn't meet again. New york was huge the percentage of them meeting again was too low for her liking but what could she do? She didn't even know his name.

Lara's phone began to vibrate and saw her father's contact name light up the screen, "Hi dad!" she beamed. She was happy to hear from her father. "Dad i'm lost. Yes i'm using the gps. And no it's not helping."

Hours after searching through the city and uber finally finding a ride, Lara Jean found herself on the NYC campus and she couldn't have been more happier. She made way to the main room to get her dorm keys. After meeting one of the office ladies, she gave Lara her key and then took her around for a quick tour so that she wouldn't get lost on her first day.

"This is your room! You'll love it here at NYU!"

Lara beamed she couldn't wait that she already started fumbling with her dorm keys. "I got to run but if you have any questions you can find me in the office."

Mrs Carol (Lara found out her name during the tour), waved goodbye, and she was just left by herself. Well by herself and an awesome view of the campus.

Lara Jean's dorm reminded her of an apartment building. Had a shared living room space with two bedrooms on each side. There was a massive window giving her the perfect view of the campus. She couldn't contain her excitement. Pulling out her phone she took pictures to send to her sisters and her father as well as her best friend, Chris. Lara remembered that Chris's cousin, Gwen is also attending NYU and she made a quick mental note to say hi whenever she saw her on campus.

She wanted this fresh start, no she needed this fresh start.

Forgetting everything of the past, she had nothing and no one to derail any plans and goals she made for herself.

Lara glanced at the time in her phone and started to realize how late it was. If I want to be done with this in time for bed I should start now ..

Time flew by as she unpacked all of her belongings, perfectly placing all of her knickknacks and trinkets. She had just finished hanging all of her fairy lights when she heard the door unlock, Must be my new roommate.

Lara walked closer to the living room excited to meet the person she'll be living with for the next couple of months. The door cracks open and she greeted by a face she never though she would be seeing.

"Gen?"

Lara Jean's former high school frenemy, Gen. Gen and Lara have very interesting history to put it simple. And now they would be sharing a dorm together, Yay ..

It's not that Lara has a problem with Gen (Anymore), It's just awkward now. Both ex girlfriends of Peter Kavinsky, and neither of them are truly friends. Maybe that would change?

"Lara? Wow hi! I can't believe we're roommates!" Gen walked over to hug Lara and Lara slightly hesitated hugging the other back.

"Would you mind helping me with my things? I brought a lot."

"Yeah of course!"

Now hours have gone by and any doubt that Lara had about Gen quickly vanished. Without realizing it the two found themselves getting into a groove. After Gen unpacked all of her things, the two decided to put on a movie, 13 going on 30, a classic Lara boosted about. Watching movies, wearing face masks, gossiping about their shared ex, and eating pizza. A perfect way to end her first day in New York.

Lara Jean was starting to feel at home already.

𝜗ৎ

Peter Parker was late.

As he usually was.

Peter promised his Aunt May that he would be on time for an (unpaid) internship interview that she vouched him for. She specifally told Peter to not be late and he swore he wouldn't be.

How was he supposed to know he would run into a cute girl?

There was just something about her, Peter thought. She had such a calm relaxing aura to her. He wanted to know more about her. Learn things about her. If only he had gotten her name.

As Peter walked into the office building he sadly settled for what might as well be written in the stars.

Peter walks up to the front desk informing the man about his interview, After waiting for two mintues the man signals that Peter can follow him.

"Hey May, they said we'll be in touch."

"Okay kiddo I hope you get it, but even if you don't just know that I'm very proud of you."

"Thanks," Peter smiled at hearing his aunt's voice. Ever since he graduated high school he moved out with his best friend, Ned. The two of them bought an apartment together with the money that they saved. Is it the best apartment? No, but it has everything that they need.

The keys jiggled in the lock of the cramped Queens apartment, and Peter pushed the door open with his shoulder, balancing a greasy paper bag of chinese takeout in one hand. The familiar, comforting hum of the refrigerator greeted him, alongside the sight of Ned hunched over his laptop at their mismatched dining table, surrounded by loose wires and empty soda cans.

"Hey dude how was it?"

Peter placed down the food on the dining room table,"It was fine I don't think I'll get it though", he removed his jacket, throwing it on the couch.

"Don't say that you never know." Ned opens up the takeout bag looking at the contents of what's inside. "Nice you got Lo mien awesome! I was craving that."

Peter laughed at his friend as he took out some plates from the kitchen cabinet, "What did you do today? Did you spend it all inside?"

"Yeah I had to. Classes start next week and professors are already uploading the syllabus and on top of that homework. I spent the entire day locking in." Ned and Peter are now plumb down in the living room eating on the couch, not really playing attention so whatever is on the tv.

"Shit that means mine are posted too."

After some shared comfortable silence as they ate their dinner, the duo began to clean up a little bit. Peter washing the dishes as Ned tidied up the living room.

Ned asked, "Besides the interview, what else happened?"

Peter's mine drifted off to the girl he briefly met. He remembered how her eyes just naturally light up without even trying.

"I ran into this girl," As Peter spoke Ned interrupted him.

"A girl? Finally! I thought you would never get over Mj."

Peter had dated one of his closest friends in high school, Mary Jane, but she insisted she was referred to as Mj. Both of them had a mutual crush on each other and decided to give the relationship a shot.

They quickly realized that they were not compatible in the slightest.

They're still friends but it's not what it used to be.

"I am over Mj." Peter shot Ned a playful glare. "There's just something so interesting about this girl. I wish I got her name I'm such an idiot."

"Wait I'm confused tell me everything."

Peter goes into details about everything that happened earlier that day. Them bumping into each other, describing what the unknown girl looks like, and how he'll never know her name.

"Don't say that you'll meet this girl again." Ned comforted his friend.

"I doubt it, you know how big New York is?"

"What if she goes to NYU?"

Peter paused to contemplate that question, "I would have seen her by now. It's fine. I've made peace with it."

"Dude you're such a loser."

𝜗ৎ

The hushed, harmonic sound of Gen’s breathing filled the quiet room, a contrast to the distant, on going sleeping hum of the city outside their window. Lara Jean stared up at the ceiling, where the faint glow of her freshly hung fairy lights cast delicate shadows across the walls. For the first time in a while, the excitement of moving faded into stillness, leaving her alone with her thoughts.

She automatically reached for her phone, her thumb hovering over her messages before she remembered. There was a sweet "goodnight" text from her dad, updates about middle school drama from Kitty, and a link about "Fun Things to do in NYC" from Margot. But no texts from Peter. There was no 'Goodnight, Covey' waiting for her.

No text to look forward to.

She began to feel empty.

Bare.

For the first time in months, that realization didn't leave a heavy, hollow ache in her chest. It just felt like a closed book.

A book that even though Lara knew like the back of her hand, if opened would leave a permeant paper cut.

The credits of 13 Going on 30 were rolling silently on the television screen. Gen was already fast asleep on the other end of the couch, a dried green clay mask tight on her face.

Lara Jean sat quietly, her knees pulled up to her chest, staring out at the city lights. The lingering scent of pepperoni pizza made the unfamiliar room feel a little more like home.

As Lara shut off her phone, her mind started to travel back to the boy she met from the sidewalk. His adorable floppy brown hair. He seemed so sincere and apologetic.

Lara Jean smiled to herself, resting her chin on her knees. She had always been a romantic, a girl who wrote secret love letters to the boys she loved before. And when the feelings became too much for her? She wrote.

Lara quietly walked over to her room, not wanting to wake up her roommate.

The floorboards didn't squeak, which was a relief. She slipped inside and gently closed the door behind her. On her new desk sat a new, leather-bound journal Margot had bought her as a parting gift alongside all of Lara's stationary belongings. “For your New York thoughts,” Margot had told her.

Lara Jean sat down, unscrewing the cap of her favorite pink gel pen. For a long time, writing was how she survived heartbreak. But tonight, as she pressed the pen to the crisp white paper, she realized she hasn't wroten a letter in years. Feeling a bit unfamiliar, her pen began to move as if it was muslve memory. Letting any feelings she had or thoughts take over.

Dear cute Boy from the Sidewalk, I don't know your name, and in a city of over eight million people, I’ll probably never see you again. But thank you for breaking my fall today. Literally. You had the kindest eyes, and even though you were running late, you made sure I was okay first. My sister Margot says everything happens for a reason. Maybe running into you was just New York's way of telling me that there are still sweet, unexpected things waiting out there in the world. I hope you made it to wherever you were rushing to on time.

She smiled, letting the ink dry before closing the journal. She didn't feel bare or empty anymore. She felt expectant. Lara ripped the page from her journal, carefully, she slipped the tip of her fingers along the edge of the paper and neatly ripped the page from the binding. She then placed the letter in the envelope. It remained unnamed and with no address. A secret message meant for the universe, and the boy who she shall never see again.

Lara Jean crawled into her new bed, pulling the duvet up to her chin. As her eyes finally grew heavy, her mind drifted between a past she was finally letting go of, and a future she couldn't wait to meet. She'll make the best of New York.

That is her only promise to herself.

And she meant to keep it.

♪ (- -ᣟ݂ ݄ ⠀ taglist! : @cheshirecat1s , @pinkheartjams

Thank you so so so MUCH for reading! I hope everyone enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing this! I am making this a series so please stayed tuned! Also thank you again from everyone that came from tiktok, the sweet comments encouraged me to keep writing.

I'll see you very soon ♡

[gglouise23]

When I’m On Stage Sometimes I Lie

Jason Todd x Female Pop Star!Reader

cw: Reader was Jason’s best friend before he died. They’re both adults now. Yearning, unrequited love (kinda?). Reader is a famous pop star. No use of Y/N. She/her pronouns used. Not much dialogue (cause I suck at it). readers dad has/had cancer.

a/n: first time writing for Jason!!! I’m kinda nervous ngl 😭

—

You thought of him constantly. When you were cooking, in the shower, sleeping, and every time you wrote a song. All your hit songs had been about him. Every single one of them.

You missed him, a lot. He had been your best friend while the two of you were in school. And if you were being honest, you had always had feeling for him. But you didn’t want to ruin the friendship.

You met Jason in the school library. You were both reaching for the last copy of Pride and Prejudice, your favorite Jane Austen book. He let you have it, but it was like at that moment, the universe decided you’d run into each other until you got close.

You saw him in the halls every day, sometimes he would give you a wave, and every time you went to the library he was there. You would sit down at a table that had the best view of where he was and study him. You memorized the shade of blue his eyes were (a greenish blue, almost teal), the pattern of his curls (god you just wanted to run your fingers through them), the way his eyebrows would slightly scrunch together when he was deeply invested in a book, and his side profile. You loved his side profile so much (you just loved his face in general).

You didn’t really know how the two of you became friends, one day he just asked you for book recommendations and suddenly you were hanging out almost every day. He even invited you to his adoptive father’s manor. The Bruce Wayne’s manor.

When intoruducing you to his family, he’d tell them your name then say “she’s my best friend”. The butler, Alfred, gave him a knowing look, a look you didn’t see. Maybe things would’ve turned out differently if you had.

He invited you to stay for dinner, you declined and said your mom was probably waiting for you to get home. She wasn’t, you were just too nervous. Being with Jason for long periods of time made your heart race and your palms sweat.

Now you wished you had accepted the invitation.

But back then, you were terrified of your feelings. Jason Todd was your first real crush. And the fact that you were even friends with him amazed you. You didn’t want to mess anything up.

You two didn’t really hang out at the manor, he mostly came over to your house. You told him about your dreams of being a pop star and even showed him some of the song you were working on. He made suggestions like “you should make this part a little faster” and “maybe make that note a little higher”, and you always followed them. They made your song special. He even helped you write the lyrics at times.

Later on in your friendship, he told you his deepest secret. He was Robin. The Robin who patrolled the streets of Gotham at night with Batman. And Bruce Wayne was Batman.

It didn’t hit you until later that night when you were about to fall asleep: your best friend was a superhero.

It amazed you how he could fight crime almost every night while not having any powers. And it certainly didn’t make you like him any less, in fact, your crush grew bigger.

When you found out your dad had cancer, your world almost collapsed. And it would’ve, if Jason hadn’t been there. He held you, comforted you, allowed you to cry.

You tried to hold on your tears the first few times he asked how you were doing. Then he caught on.

“You know it’s okay to cry, right?” He asked one gloomy afternoon as the two of you sat in his bedroom. “You don’t have to hold it all in when you’re around me.”

And just like that, you broke. You started out by just softly crying in your hands until he pulled you into a hug. Soon enough, your snot and tears were on his hoodie, but he didn’t mind, he just continued to hold you.

Your dad ended up in remission, thank god. If he hadn’t survived, you genuinely didn’t know what you would’ve done. Especially if Jason wasn’t there. The truth is, you probably would’ve ended up in a ditch somewhere in Crime Alley.

You thought your life was getting better, you thought you’d finally be happy. Your dad was healthy and you and Jason’s friendship was brewing with tension. Then the phone call came.

When you saw it was the manors number calling you, you immediately thought it was Jason.

“Hi Jay! I was actually just working on a song and I need your opinion,” you said into the phone.

Someone cleared their throat, someone who was not Jason. A British accent made you realize you were speaking to Alfred. “Miss, I have some news and I’d advise you to sit down before you hear it.”

You obediently followed his instructions and sat down on the couch. “What is it Alfred? Is Jason okay?”

There was a sigh. Not a sigh of annoyance, but one of sadness and guilt. “I’m so sorry Miss, but Jason died last night.”

You went completely still and your breath got stuck in your throat. You couldn’t comprehend his words, Jason Todd was not dead. He was Robin, and being Robin basically meant he was magic and couldn’t die, right?

“W-what? You’re joking, right? I mean you have to be, Jason can’t be dead, he’s Robin!”

“I’m very sorry Miss, but I’m afraid it’s true. He died last night,” Alfred gently told you.

“How?” You regretted asking as soon as the word left your mouth.

Another sad sigh came from the other line. “The joker. He… beat him to death with a crowbar, then there was an explosion. I’m sorry, I really am.”

A sob escaped your throat. “No, you’re lying. Jason’s not dead, he’s Robin. He can’t die. He…he just can’t.”

“I’m sorry Miss, but it’s true.”

You hung up the phone out of denial and anger. Your Jason Todd was not dead. You took a few shaky breaths to calm the tears that threatened to spill and called Jason’s number. It went straight to voicemail.

That was the moment you realized Jason Todd, your best friend and crush, was really dead. He always answered the phone for you, no matter what. And that was the moment your world collapsed.

You didn’t get out of bed for a week until your parents forced you to go to school. You ate lunch alone that day, and didn’t step foot near the library. A week later you burned your copy of Pride and Prejudice and hid all your photos of him in the back of your closet, you didn’t want any reminders of him.

Two weeks after the phone call you finally let yourself cry. Snot and tears covered your pillow but you didn’t care. You cried and cried until there was no more tears left.

“It’s okay to cry.”

Those words were your moto. Every time you wanted to cry, you did. You stopped holding in your emotions. It helped a lot.

You continued to write songs, most of them were related to Jason, and after high school you decided to put them out into the world.

Your songs became popular overnight, everyone loved them. And soon enough, you had a group of fans that kept on growing.

No one knew who your most popular songs were about. No one knew who JT was in the credits of your songs. And they didn’t need to know.

When you were performing on stage, you lied and said you loved those songs just as much as your fans did. No one knew that singing those songs felt like getting your heart torn into a million pieces again.

When you were writing a new song you always asked yourself if Jason would like it. He probably would, he had loved all of your early songs.

You missed him. A lot. You just wanted your best friend back.

Little did you know, Jason Todd was alive and wanted you back too.

a/n: there is a part 2 coming (I promise!) so please let me know if u want to be added to the taglist. If you enjoyed this, please consider following me to make sure you don’t miss out on any other fics! 💜