for: ritu bhardwaj & friday markov ( @rhythmicals ) ( @ex3rtion ) where: st. cuthbert auditorium ( school - wide safe sex assembly)
"Hey, Ritu," Leaning in close so that she could hear his whisper, pointing to the obviously blown up anatomical image of a penis that flashed onto the projector, "pay attention to this part. That's a phallus. You'll wanna know how to operate that thang." Purposely using the most obnoxious pronunciation. Soren had been joking, when he suggested dragging Ritu to the safe-sex assembly - he'd expected them to stick around for a handful of minutes before eventually ditching; Ritu huffing, Soren cackling. Instead, she seemed to be genuinely interested in the display in front of them. Personally, Soren checked out at the abysmal demonstration they'd given on how to properly put on a condom, almost rocketing it across the room and hitting a student right in the eye before eventually snapping it on, somewhat aggressively. "I am so fucking boooooored. Christ, can we go already? I'm about to fake a seizure -." Like the voice of god booming down around them, Soren froze when he heard one of the spokesperson call out to them in the microphone, words projecting over the speakers in the auditorium, "Hi! The three who keep chatting back there - if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to just raise your hand and ask." Clearly a bit miffed. Soren felt it was his sole purpose now to rectify the situation. It might embarrass Ritu further, but it was a sacrifice he was willing to make. "Yeah, sorry 'bout that!" He called back, raising his hand so that when he pointed at Ritu, it was from above her head. "My friend here was just concerned about the aesthetics of a penis. I just had to break it to her that they're all kinda that offensive looking. She's in shock - you understand. We'll be escorting ourselves out!" Soren nodded towards the exit, look of pure innocent adorning otherwise impish features, "Can we go now?"
