#* crovvder .

[shegunfire-blog]

♟ / yEARLY ANGST REUNION IS A THING. and it's our thing

* ACTS OF INTIMACY : OPEN

                   blue eyes lazily watched as skilled fingers peeled off the now bloodied bandages away from ava’s brand new wound. shot in the chest   ━━  𝚆𝙷𝙾 𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝙷𝙰𝚅𝙴 𝚃𝙷𝙾𝚄𝙶𝙷𝚃 ? after all the bruises she had found over her pale skin , this would be the one that’d stick with her forever . and yet it was the one that had hurt the least . boyd crowder was far gentler than his brother . didn’t matter whether the scent of gunpowder was permanently stuck under his fingernails , ava knew the softness those calloused hands were capable of ; she had witnessed it many times before . 𝚃𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙳𝙴𝚁 𝙼𝙾𝙼𝙴𝙽𝚃 ( despite the crimson shade now staining his palms ) 𝚆𝙰𝚂 𝙽𝙾 𝙴𝚇𝙲𝙴𝙿𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽 .

             having a bullet piercing through her flesh had been a breeze compared to the years of abuse she had suffered while married to bowman. the scar was ugly : a small circle of twisting skin desperately trying to regenerate itself and cover up the hollowness that , from time to time , still found itself oozing with blood . but as ava glanced down at it and watched boyd carefully cleaning it with a wet cloth , she couldn’t help but feel a distant sense OF PRIDE. the purple bruises once spread out across her ribs had been left there by a bitter possessive man. that little hole over her breast was there because of ava. she had agreed to this ; she had wanted to protect boyd just as much as he had wanted to protect her. 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚈 𝚆𝙴𝚁𝙴 𝙴𝚀𝚄𝙰𝙻𝚂 𝚄𝙽𝙳𝙴𝚁 𝚃𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚁𝙾𝙾𝙵. and the mere thought of that made the blonde’s heart throb. she loved boyd crowder enough to die for him.

            ❝      if you were lookin’ to get me undressed you could have just asked.    ❞     she playfully mentioned when feeling one of his hands brushing over the lace of her bra. she knew it hurt him to see her branded in the same way as he was. his eyes had been so focused and his jaw so tightly clenched during this little ritual of theirs that ava couldn’t help but think that the man might be punishing himself by forcing his stare to meet nothing but the blood and gore decorating her chest. had he raised his brown eyes once and he would have realized just how enthralled she was by him. ava just wanted to make him smile   ━━  wanted to reassure boyd that she didn’t regret 𝙰𝙽𝚈 𝙾𝙵 𝚃𝙷𝙸𝚂 . she ran one slim finger up his arm , offering boyd a sultry smirk.      ❝       no need to get your hands dirty like that.     ❞    

[detectiev]

  @crovvder​ / STARTER CALL / SEE YOU IN HELL

       he wasn’t there . well , his body was . but somehow , rust had managed to step out of that poor excuse of a bar , opened his arms and ascended . he was watching the back of his own head from a dark corner of the universe ; no not even the universe , something exterior to that , a fourth dimension . safe and sound and unreachable . rustin cohle had become a fly on a cosmic wall . finally freed from all the complex demands that came with that prison of flesh he had called a body . finally at peace with the simplicity that was being a bug . easily squashed but easily lived too . no more nightmares , no more ties , nothing . rust slowly exhaled through his nostrils .         ❝         shiiit .       ❞       rust was high .

          he had been high for days now . his sanity and mood depended on whatever fucked up cocktail ginger and his crew were into that week . rust had worked hard to earn their trust , but the cost was far too high . blue eyes  (  now turned black due to cohle’s dilated pupils  )  blinked rapidly , trying to focus back on the physical realm . BOYD CROWDER and his office came into focus . between those walls rustin was known as crash . and crash knew all about the crowders and their reputation . THE OUTLAW ; boyd was the kind of guy who men like ginger and miles could sympathize with  :   it was him against the whole world . he’d elbow his way through life with the help of gunpowder and fire if he had to , in an attempt to achieve some ridiculous ideal of greatness that simply didn’t exist . he had been spreading chaos for years and continued to be forgiven by a community too damn miserable to recognize how poisonous crowder and his brood actually was .      ━━━      disgusting .

          rust sucked on a cigarette that had nearly died out while lazily examining his business partner from head to toe . crowder looked much larger than he remembered .         ❝         thought you’d be havin’ a whole lot more people out there , boyd . friday night ‘n’ all that .       ❞        cohle drawled , glancing at the office’s door for a moment . the walls shivered around him . he thought it might have been because of the buzzing of his wings . rust blinked harder and turned to face boyd again . he couldn’t believe he had to continue to remind himself that he wasn’t , in fact , a bug .          ❝         ginger ain’t comin’       ❞        he finally confessed with a cloud of smoke .         ❝         if you unhappy with our product you can tell me all about it .       ❞     

[detectiev]

“ self-awareness doesn’t reveal my indiscretions; exhaustion does. ” okay bood : @crovvder​ ──────     SONS OF ANARCHY / OPEN

                arms slowly cross over his chest as rustin cohle sighs . boyd crowder had nothing to do with their jurisdiction . not usually at least . his files were riddled with all sorts of UNLAWFUL ACTIVITIES . but they read more like the ramblings of a maniac who had spent too much time with his head buried in coal than the plans of an evil mastermind . the detective stared him down . nothing in his expression indicated any interest or intrigue . all rust looked liked nowadays was TIRED .  ───   the anniversary of his daughter’s death was creeping up on him . drying out his throat and filling up his lungs with the threat of a scream . GHOSTS LOOMED OVER HIS HEAD . and rust wouldn’t dare look up at them . all he could really do was stare straight ahead at boyd crowder and his unsettling white teeth . he needed to focus on the interrogation room they both sat in . avoid the outside world . avoid thinking about time . try not to fall back into the cycle . at least not right now . be suspended . in here , with him . 

                   (  boyd crowder’s confession would have to serve as a mantra for now .  )

                     ❝        you’re nothin’ but indiscreet , boyd .     ❞     the detective pointed out , dragging each consonant across his gravely throat . there seemed to be a note of levity to his reply , but each and every feature on rust’s face was weighed down . LACK OF SLEEP ; of good natural sleep , at least . all the rest cohle ever seemed to get nowadays was induced by downers . colorful little cocktails of pills he wasn’t supposed to get his hands on . he allowed himself to lean against his chair . well rested or not , HE WAS STILL THE BEST INTERROGATOR THAT DEPARTMENT HAD . because cruelty did not scare him . 

                      not when it came to men like boyd . rust had read his file : bunch of lost children , bred into violent households and minimum wage jobs , getting caught in traps meant only for adults at a young age , putting their traumas and hardships up on a pedestal so that , whenever they fucked up BIG TIME , they could look up at their shitty upbringing and feel justified . claiming it was for power , claiming it was for freedom , claiming it was for love ! but , really , men like crowder were as complex as toddlers crying for THEIR MOTHERS’ TIT .  

                         ❝       that’s why you got a whole lotta people across the nation sticking their noses in your business .    ❞    cohle shrugged .    ❝       guess i’m here to join the dog pile .    ❞