Nivium is the coming of age story of a starry-eyed girl who sees adventure in the remains of the world she knew, and it is also the story of a girl and her squid.
This post-apocalyptic novel follows the story of Agatha Lu, a young girl living in a close-minded village by the shore in the middle of nuclear winter. She along with her best friend, a giant squid with mysterious intelligence that she names Pinky, escape the village and go off on an adventure to see what the new world is like outside the confines of their home.
Together, they meet new faces and encounter strange secrets that had long since been forgotten in the aftermath of the war, and not everything they find outside the village is the adventurous world that they wanted to see. This disillusionment forces her to come to terms with who she is and what she wants, before the reality of the new world crushes her in her moment of indecision.
changed my mind, here have an excerpt with the redheaded sibs
they're boarding something up
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“Truth be told, I didn't even think I'd have anything to hide after coming out to Mom and Dad. I kinda thought 'well, now that that secret's out, I think I'd say my secret-holding-and-confessing quota has been filled for a lifetime.' I suppose that was sort of an oversight on my part. It's not like anyone can avoid old habits forever...”
Sheila grabbed two nearby pieces of wood, holding one over her shoulder and carrying the other under her arm. “Sorry, were you still talking? I kind of just tune you out when you take on the first person narrator voice.”
“You know, I was thinking of writing a book about all my experiences as soon as I had a stable job,” Roy continued despite Sheila's eyeroll and 'oh God, there's more?' in response. He picked up a pack of nails and cautiously made his way back. “Like an autobiography of sorts. I thought maybe it would help if there was a guy out there who was willing to share his experiences as a gay man, so that they'd know there's someone out there who went through the same things they did.” He set the board and nails down and went back for the hammer. “And I would've included you, too, of course. I wanted to be able to show people that sometimes it won't get better unless you strive to make it happen for you. You were a pretty good example of that, I think.”
“If you really believed what I said about making better happen, you wouldn't have held off on writing that book,” Sheila commented from the darker side of the room.
“How do you figure that?” Roy asked with a raised eyebrow as he returned to the corner.
Sheila held up one of the boards horizontally across the scar and withdrew a nail from her mouth. It was smudged red with lipstick. “You were procrastinating, weren't you? Instead of actively planning out how you were going to go about writing it, you made excuses like 'oh, I'm too busy for that now' or 'I'll have time to do it later' and ultimately ended up never accomplishing anything.”
Roy frowned and set down the lamp so he could hammer the nail into the board. “This coming from the Duchess of Laziness herself?” He shooed Sheila's thick fingers away, ensuring that she wouldn't get hit. “Just because you managed to get a decent job in the fashion industry, doesn't mean you're qualified to assess anyone else's life choices,” he said over the ringing sound of steel meeting steel.
“I'm just saying, that's not what I would do if I were following the motto,” Sheila said with a shrug.
“Oh? So what would you do, then? Quit your job and write full time while leeching off a random boy toy?” Roy quipped with more venom than he had intended.
Sheila scowled at him. “No. I would make time to write. Or, if I couldn't do that, I'd at least try to plan out the book whenever I had the opportunity. I'd work on it somehow, at least once a day, until I got that precious 'free time' you assumed you would have after getting a stable job—which really wasn't a one-hundred-percent guarantee, if you think about it.”
Roy hammered at the nail until it was completely in and looked at Sheila. “Explain,” he said, now less annoyed and more curious.
Sheila took out another nail and held it below the previous one. As Roy resumed hammering, she went on to explain as told, “What if you met a guy, settled down, and got married after you got a stable job? You would be so strung out about the wedding that you wouldn't even think about writing. And then there would be the inevitable post-marital stress and fighting, and then you would be thinking about adoption... You'd have no time, because it would never magically land in your lap until you were old and wrinkly.”
“Hey, what's wrong with writing a memoir when you're old and wrinkly?” Roy interjected, if only to be contradictory.
Sheila snorted and grinned at him. “Actually, I think I'd like an LGBT novel written by an old gay guy. I take everything back, go ahead with that plan. A hundred percent approval.”
Roy snorted back. “You know I would've been that one old guy who couldn't shut up about back when he was a kid,” he mused.
“And every time you try to bring up your novel, everyone in the retirement home would groan collectively,” Sheila added with a smirk.
“Yeah...” Roy blew out a deep breath as he finished up the second nail.
apparently it's sibling day so here have a june/agatha sisterhood bonding thing
"Did you even run a brush through this once?" June said with a 'tsk' as she examined the damage done.
"Of course I did," Agatha replied, affronted.
"Liar." June picked up the brush sitting on the vanity in front of her and ran it through Agatha's hair, with some difficulty. She made a short noise of frustration. "Jesus, Agatha... You know that tying it back doesn't make it that much neater, right?"
"At least it's out of the way," Agatha said with a petulant shrug. She blew a strand of hair out of her face and looked at June's reflection in the mirror in front of her. "If I leave it down, it gets all frizzy and gross."
June managed to force the brush through with some yanking, eliciting a short series of 'ow!'s from Agatha. "You need to take better care of it. I swear, one day you're going to wake up and your hair's going to be one giant knot in the back of your head. And tying it back won't save you."
Agatha shrugged again. "Then I'll just chop it off like Mulan did."
"Hey." June hit her lightly with the underside of the brush, again eliciting an 'ow!' from her. "Don't use Mulan to make excuses for your laziness."
Agatha stuck her tongue out at her reflection. "It worked for her, didn't it?"
June's reflection rolled her eyes at her. "Even if that wasn't such a silly idea, you'd be hard pressed to find a sword in this day and age. Just brush your hair; it's really that much easier."
"Did Mom used to do your hair for you?" Agatha asked, and in context of the conversation it made perfect sense, but it truly came out of nowhere. The few times that they ever discussed their parents were in the middle of arguments, and even then the topic was brought up by June and not Agatha. It was rare that Agatha ever voluntarily went into a discussion about their mom or dad, and in retrospect she wasn't all that sure why. It wasn't exactly something she did on purpose, but each and every time it came up, she felt her heart sink a little and mused that it probably related to the reason. She just couldn't make the connection, yet.
The question must have taken June by surprise, because she stopped yanking through the knots long enough to allow Agatha some time to digest the throbbing in her head. She was seriously considering brushing her hair more often when June finally answered, "...Yeah, she did. She's the one who taught me how to put my hair up in a bun."
Agatha turned around to face her directly, eyebrows raised in curiosity. "Really? I thought you taught yourself how to do that..."
"Nope. That was all mom." June turned Agatha's head so she was facing forward again and resumed brushing; it became easier with time. "She taught me all sorts of styles and techniques when I was younger. I used all of them for parties, Sweet Sixteens, dances, dinners... I don't think I even remember all of them now, come to think of it. Lately all I have time for is work and running errands, so either way I don't think I'd have the time to relearn any of it. It's probably the same for her, too." She paused, then patted Agatha's shoulder lightly. "I'm sure she would teach you a few, too, if you asked her to."
Agatha's face crumpled. "Ew, no way. I don't want to look like you." June hit her with the brush again. "Ow! Stop that!"
aaaaaaaaaaaaaand finally i got to sheila's introduction!
i went through and edited it several times just so i could get sheila's voice right, and i'm still not quite satisfied with it tbh but here it is! there isn't much context to set here; agatha just met a little girl who got hurt while playing tag and offered to take her home since she couldn't walk on her bad leg. when they arrive, sheila's the one to answer the door.
Agatha cleared her throat and nodded. “Right. Sorry.” Without further delay, she approached the door and knocked.
There was an abrupt pause in the conversations being held inside, but they resumed immediately after one of the patrons proclaimed, “I’ll get it!” Agatha shifted anxiously from foot to foot as the muffled click of someone’s heels drew closer, until finally they stopped right behind the door. Agatha stared, waiting for it to swing open, but instead a little slot toward the top of the door slid aside and revealed a pair of brown eyes. They blinked at her curiously through the opening.
“Hello,” the person behind the door greeted. “Password?”
“Uh...” Agatha replied intelligently. When the eyes simply blinked at her, she carefully shifted Faye to her other arm and gestured toward her. “I’m just here to drop off this little girl. She directed me to this place.”
The eyes narrowed at her. “And why would she ask you to drop her off? She has legs.”
“She got hurt playing tag with some other kid, so she can’t walk. You could ask her yourself.” Agatha looked at Faye, but the girl was hiding her face in her shoulder. “Right, Faye?”
Faye squirmed away from the eyes peeking through the door and muttered something into Agatha’s shoulder. “What was that?” Agatha asked with a frown. Faye repeated it more loudly, but it still came out muffled. “What? Hey, let go so we can hear you.”
Albeit reluctantly, Faye obeyed and faced the door with averted eyes. “...I’m sorry, Aunt Sheila...”
The brown eyes peering at them through the door widened slightly. “Oh, baby, it’s okay! Come here.”
The opening in the door slid shut and, after several bolts and locks were undone, the door itself finally swung open. Immediately, out came a tall redhead woman in black heels, spreading her arms out wide to retrieve Faye from Agatha. Agatha clumsily handed her off and released a deep breath as the weight was finally lifted from her arms. The redhead woman seemed to carry Faye with no problems, however, and even managed to maintain her balance perfectly in her high heel shoes. She smiled widely at Faye and kissed her cheek, leaving a smudge of red lipstick on her face. Faye giggled and looped her arms around the woman’s neck in a similar fashion to how she clung to Agatha, though she was clearly more comfortable with the woman.
The redhead herself was made up nicely, with dark maroon lips and just enough blush to emphasize the contours of her face. Her hair came down her back in curls that were dull and frayed from the lack of proper hair care, but Agatha couldn’t help but admire them regardless. She wore a black turtleneck that came down to her elbows and gray slacks with buttons at the cuffs; simple, yet altogether an oddly stylish outfit for someone who was living in the middle of nuclear winter. Then again, perhaps the woman’s wardrobe simply consisted of many stylish things. Amelia would have liked her, she mused. She was, after all, always trying her best to look good with what she had.
“Thanks for taking care of my niece,” the woman said after properly smothering Faye with affection. “And sorry for whatever trouble she caused you. Kids, you know? They live through a catastrophic apocalypse just once and they think they’re invincible.”
Agatha grinned a bit, sheepish. “It’s cool. I wasn’t really busy doing much, anyway,” she confessed.
The woman appraised her for a moment, leaning against the doorframe. “I don’t believe we’ve met before, have we? What’s your name, chica?”
“Agatha. Agatha Liu.”
“Agatha...” the woman repeated, sounding out her name into carefully separated syllables. “That’s a cute name.” The woman took Faye into one arm and stretched out her free hand. “Mine’s Sheila. I run a bar here with my brother, Roy.”
Agatha took her hand and shook it. “Oh, that’s cool,” she said without thinking. Immediately after the words came out of her mouth, she lost a bit of her confident momentum and blushed; she was relying far too heavily on that one stock phrase, and it was quickly becoming a bad habit.
Sheila just smiled, and then beamed suddenly. “Hey, you know what? You can tell your folks to stop by and barter with us sometime. We accept supplies, fuel, souvenirs--anything, really--in exchange for food and services. Sometimes we can even offer a place to stay,” she said. There was an ominous crash behind her, followed by a short pause and nervous laughter. She leaned in and lowered her voice to say, “We don’t have any vacancies at the moment, but as soon as these two bozos take off I think we’ll have enough room.” She winked. “Do you have anything you can trade? Something you can bear to part with?”
Briefly, Agatha was reminded of Natasha’s attempt to ‘barter’ with her over the boat and decided that avoiding that line of questioning was probably for the best. “Uh...no, that’s okay. My parents...aren’t with me right now,” she answered slowly, choosing her words carefully.
Sheila frowned. “Don’t tell me you’re traveling alone?” Agatha nodded mutely and waited for her frown to grow even deeper, but instead she just raised her eyebrows. “Really? Wow, I’ve gotta say, that’s impressive for your age. You must’ve been just a few years older than Faye here when the bombings occurred. I’m sorry to hear that.”
Agatha shook her head. “Well, I haven’t been traveling alone all my life. I just started recently,” she confessed.
Sheila looked between Agatha and Faye, who was growing more and more visibly uncomfortable as the conversation progressed. “One moment, sweetie,” Sheila said to Agatha before temporarily kicking the door shut.
Agatha waited impatiently, again shifting from foot to foot as time went on. She could feel the blood between her legs beginning to spread to her inner thighs and shuddered, pressing her legs more tightly together. Even if they did have a pad for her to use, she didn’t have anything on her that she could trade off. After all, Natasha would kill her if she let anything happen to the medical kit. There wasn’t anything on the boat for her to use, either, so she was stuck bleeding through her clothes until either Natasha and Ryan returned or Penny and the others caught up with them, whichever came first. Either way, her clothes were doomed to be ruined, and her extra set was still in the middle of drying.
The door creaked as it was reopened, snapping Agatha out of her thoughts. “Sorry about that,” Sheila said, her arms Faye-free. “I had to take Faye to her daddy. Poor girl’s going to get a real verbal lashing for going out too far into the city again. He’s such a drag, honestly.” She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, then brightened again. “But he told me to thank you.” Agatha just smiled uneasily, her thighs still pressed together oddly. Sheila noted her discomfort with a raised eyebrow and nodded at her. “What’s that, the pee-pee dance?”
Agatha’s face colored quickly. “...Do you guys, um, have a bathroom or something?” she asked, partially sidestepping the question.
Sheila hummed thoughtfully. “Well, normally I’d have to charge you to use our facilities, but I suppose that the bandages you used on Faye’s leg could be considered your payment. Plus, to be honest, I’d really prefer it if you didn’t piss all over my front porch,” she replied.
okay so i have talked about most of the women of nivium so far, and i've talked a little bit about one of them men (roy), but now let's talk about the other two main men.
i'll start with ryan. ryan is natasha's cousin and is usually the recipient of the brunt of her insults. he's 19 years old and the youngest of the group until agatha and then eventually faye come along, so that combined with natasha's ridicule of him makes him determined to prove his worth. he knows a thing or two about medicine from his parents, so that's mainly what he tries to prove himself best in. his weapon of choice is a crowbar, which isn't very good against guns, but he's got a good swing anyway.
he's a very friendly and kind person who likes to joke around a lot. basically he's a doormat who is trying to undo his doormatty reputation.
so i wasn't able to get to sheila's introduction (even though i did get a chunk of writing done, so at least this week wasn't totally unproductive) BUT hey i'm finally in the act where she is introduced :) :D
i guess i'll use this opportunity to talk about acts? as you can see in the status tag, i've got a total of 4 or 5 acts planned out (actually maybe six at this point lol). each act is, of course, centered around one conflict that, more often than not, introduces a new set of characters. there are also occasional intermissions that talk about how june is holding up back in belwood in the aftermath of agatha's departure.
i'll summarize the acts and characters of acts 1-3, but any acts beyond that are so far off and spoilery that i can't really disclose much info about them. also, if you are betaing for me (aka if your name is aga) then don't read shoo go away etc because you haven't reached act 3 yet
so yes here:
ACT ONE: BELWOOD
synopsis: agatha is a misguided teenager living in a post-ww3 town named belwood. this act mainly provides a little bit of exposition about the world, and tons of exposition about agatha's backstory, personality, and relationship with pinky. the act ends with agatha leaving belwood.
characters:
agatha liu (protagonist)
pinky (good squid, best friend)
june liu (older sister)
headband girl (friend?)
the liu parents
mark (asshole dude)
the principal
ACT TWO: LOUISIANA
synopsis: after roughing it out at sea with pinky for a little over a week, agatha finds herself in the middle of a wintery wasteland with no food or water. at the same time, a group of misfit traveling survivors located not far from where agatha landed searches for the thief who stole a large chunk of their food, weapons, and medicine, all while dealing with some slight inner-group conflicts.
characters:
natasha (leader)
george (sub-leader?)
penny (best friend of the leader)
ryan (EMT and cousin of the leader)
vic (follower of george)
jude (friend of vic)
ACT THREE: THE GREENLIGHT
synopsis: agatha and natasha arrive at the greenlight, which is an underground bar being used as a shelter for those who have no home to go to. there they try to barter for supplies, and wind up getting caught in a conflict that puts the whole bar in danger.
i'm rereading some june scenes and found one you guys (meaning rebecca since she's the only one who reads these lol) might like
“Hey, watch your mouth,” her father scolded. “This town is a wonderful place with wonderful people. You should be grateful for it.”
“Grateful? Why the fuck should I be grateful for a town full of people who hate me--even the people in my own house? Why should I be grateful for teachers who treat me like I’m dumb or kids who treat me like I’m a weirdo or a family who treats me like a disappointment? Why should I be grateful for a bunch of stupid people who don’t know anything about any-fucking-thing in the world?” The volume of Agatha’s voice escalated as she went on. She could feel her face growing red with anger. Before anyone could argue, she stood abruptly and slammed her napkin on the table. “I hate it here, and I hate you!”
Agatha rushed out and into her bedroom, but not before catching the sound of June calling after her. She quickly locked the door behind her and wiped clumsily at her eyes with her arm. Her other arm stretched overhead to tug at the string attached to her ceiling lamp, which blinked on in an instant. A myriad of thoughts ran through her head all at once, though before she could act on them, June knocked at the door.
“Agatha, open up. We need to talk,” she said, her voice coming in muffled.
“Leave me alone!” Agatha replied as she looked through her duffle bags in a hasty attempt to figure out which one she stashed the giant jar of fresh fish in.
June sighed. “Look, I know what it’s like for you at your age. I had trouble getting along with my classmates, too. I even had problems getting along with some of my coworkers here. I know it’s tough, but you’re not going to solve anything by making an enemy out of everyone.”
Agatha tripped over a stray pillow left on the floor and fell painfully on top of a duffle bag with something round and hard in it. At least she found the fish. “I’m not making an enemy out of everyone, everyone’s making an enemy out of me,” she argued, trying her best not to sound winded.
“Will you just listen to yourself? I’m not the bad guy here; I’m just trying to help you. And Mom and Dad are just worried that if you keep acting bitter and alone, that’s how you’ll turn out in the end. We’re all worried about you,” June insisted.
Next was the gauze and medicine. She kept those somewhere in her bookshelves, just behind the aquatic life encyclopedias. “Mom and Dad don’t care about anyone but themselves,” she protested as she shoved the books aside delicately, as to not make a loud noise that could be heard through the door. “They stopped caring about me a long time ago. I’m a lost cause. You’re the only one around here who even bothers keeping up with me anymore.”
“That’s not true, and you know it. They love you. They love both of us. You just need to cut them some slack. It’s been a rough six years, you know. Dad’s been busy planning out new wall designs to keep the outsiders away, and Mom’s been busy as hell with the cancer survivors. They work really hard to keep us fed and sheltered,” June explained.
Agatha stuffed the items into her pockets and paused to stare at the door separating herself and June. “It’s easy for you to defend them because you can make them proud. You’re strong, and smart, and responsible, and everyone always expects the best out of you. They don’t just give up on you before you even try.” There was a long pause. Agatha waited for June to respond, but she didn’t, so she continued, “We’re not the same. So stop acting like we are.”
Another pause. Briefly, Agatha mulled over a mental checklist of what to bring. She seemed to be forgetting something. “I’m not giving up on you,” June said finally. Rather than elaborating on what she said, the sound of her footsteps retreated from the door and gradually faded away.
Agatha knelt on her bed in silence for a while, staring at the door.
“...Flashlight,” she remembered. She grabbed one from beneath her bed; it was a headlamp typically used by miners back when the coal mines were still open, or so she had been told. After fastening it around her head, she zipped herself up and opened the window.
She smirked. June may have been smart, but she always seemed to forget the small window in her room hidden behind Mr. Teddy.
