他意识到自己的手还被墨燃握着，细密贴合。他不知道该怎么办，又急又紧张，眼眶都有些红了，下意识又想把指尖抽走。
可只是动了一下，就被墨燃紧握住了。男人的掌心沁着汗，是湿润的。
“别拿走。”
“……”
他的力道那么大，固执又倔强，不知为什么，楚晚宁忽然觉得，他的言语间，似乎有些悲伤。墨燃眼神沉炽，盯着他看了良久，低沉沙哑道：“楚晚宁……”
“……你叫我什么？”
“……是我言错。”
楚晚宁此刻的身子绷得比先前还紧了，心跳比初时御剑更快，他不习惯，太不习惯。他努力拾掇自己的阵脚，再堕入这大深渊前，再做最后的一次垂死挣扎。他低垂着眼帘，说：
“嗯，知道自己言错，那也不是无药可……”
墨燃心很热，终于不假思索，脱口而出：“晚宁。”
救。
最后一个字，楚晚宁还没有来得及说口。再听到这一声带着叹息的温柔嗓音时，他脑中嗡的作响，刹时一片空白。这最后一个字，也是再也说不出口了。
无药可救。
无药可救——
他们在爱欲的泥潭外踟躇犹豫了那么久，终于忍不住一脚踏入，陷于其中，从此天罗地网，入骨悱恻。墨燃嗓音低哑，他凝视着他：“晚宁，其实这几天，我有句话，一直想问你。”
“……”
心烫得厉害，墨燃紧紧攥着楚晚宁的手，手指在发抖：“不，我不问你了。”
楚晚宁才刚松一口气，却听得墨燃说了下一句。“我什么都不问你了，我只想告诉你。”
墨燃斩钉截铁，永不回头。一口气，倾尽了全部勇气。
“我喜欢你。”
心脏在剧烈震颤着。
“我喜欢你，不是徒弟对师尊的喜欢，是……是我胆大包天，我……我喜欢你。” - Ch. 179
He realized that Mo Ran was still grasping his hand, their palms intimately touching. He didn’t know what to do. He was both anxious and nervous; the rims of his eyes were even a bit red. Unconsciously, he again wanted to pull the tips of his fingers away.
But after only a slight movement, they were tightly grasped by Mo Ran.
The man’s palms dripped wetly with sweat.
“Don’t let go.”
“...”
His strength was great— he was stubborn and contumacious— but for some reason, Chu Wanning suddenly thought that his words almost seemed sorrowful.
Mo Ran’s gaze was deep and fiery. He stared at him for a while, then said mutely: “Chu Wanning...”
“...What did you just call me?”
“....I misspoke.”
Now, Chu Wanning’s body was even stiffer than before, his heartbeat quicker than it was when they had initially stepped onto the sword. This was unfamiliar, all too unfamiliar. With effort, he arranged his posture, putting up a last-ditch struggle before venturing forward into the abyss.
He lowered his lashes, saying: “En, as long as you know you misspoke, then it’s not like no medicine can...”
Mo Ran’s heart was hot. At last, he spoke without hesitation, blurting: “Wanning.”
Save you.
These last two words, Chu Wanning had not yet had the time to say.
After hearing this tender tone, the sound carried by a sigh, his head erupted with buzzing, everything a blank white.
Those last two words would never be said.
No medicine can save you.
No medicine can save you--
They had wavered outside the mire of love for so long; at last, they could no longer resist stepping in and falling inside, letting themselves be inescapably bound, letting grief seep into their bones.
Mo Ran’s voice was low, watching him: “Wanning, in these past few days, there’s a question I’ve been wanting to ask you.”
His heart was scalding. Mo Ran tightly gripped Chu Wanning’s hand, his fingers trembling: “No, I won’t ask you.”
Chu Wanning had just let out a breath of relief when he heard Mo Ran follow up with another sentence.
“I won’t ask you anything. I just want to tell you.”
Mo Ran was resolute; he would never look back.
He took a breath, mustering all of his courage.
“I like you.”
His heart was ferociously thundering.
“I like you, and not the way a disciple likes his shizun... It’s... it’s that I’m too audacious, I... I like you.”
translating my favorite 2ha passages, 6/?