100 days of Headcanons || Day 8: Loss
Connor has experienced loss in a lot of ways. Starting with the loss of his first mission, resulting in the loss of the child called Emma. This is a partially hard loss for him, mainly because of how indifferent he felt about it at the time. He had done the best he could at the time and the unit was simply to unstable to be dealt with properly but experience comes with age and the more cases he did after being reassigned, the more he realized his failure during his first mission was unacceptable because he failed to use other means in which to secure his success. Emma’s death now haunts him to the point that he refuses to do anything on his ‘birthday.’ It is a day in which a life was loss at his own hands and celebrating him being alive is simply an insult. He will take an hour of his day to visit her grave and leave flowers.
He’s also experienced a loss of self. He was once a deviant hunter but after deviation and having only been alive for 3 months, he’s not sure what he’s supposed to be. This has not changed almost 3 years later, he’s watched countless people grow and find their place in the world and he still feels as lost and more alone then ever.












