Aros Like Me
Prompt 2 | February 19-20 | Visibility
How has representation (coded or explicit) in media helped you? How has a lack of it harmed you? What would your ideal aro/arospec representation be? What do you think the aro community could do to make ourselves visible to others? What would you like more people to know about aros? If aromanticism and its spectrum were widely known, would you be more open about your arospec identity?
I just... i want aro to stop meaning “never feels romantic attraction”. I want aro to mean “little to no romantic attraction”. I want a relatable loveable character who is demi. I want cupio characters, romantic daydreaming characters, who cant fall in love with anything but the concept of love itself. I want grey characters, who have imprecise and imperfect patterns of romantic attraction, who are struggling with and confused about whether they are aro or not. I want characters where their being aro doesnt affect them at all. I want characters who are constantly going on about their being aro, because it’s important to them. I want aro characters in healthy romantic relationships. I want aro characters who realize they love their partner differently than their partner loves them. I want to watch QPRs form and grow. I want the narrative around aros to stop including dogs or pets or kids or having something to care for. I want aros to be enough when they are completely independent. I want aros who are enough independently but still want more as a partnering/ amorous aro. I want to see that i can have a future the way I want it, not the way allos want it, not how romance repulsed aros want it.
i want aro characters who are represetative of the community theyre in. i want diverse aros. i want aros who’s aro identity matters to them and still feel limited romantic attraction. i want aro characters who feel like they have 1,000 hoops to jump through to feel romantic attraction. I want aros who feel like their romantic attraction comes out of no where. I want romantic aros who are feeling broken from being told their identities are just internalized amatonormativity. I want aros who feel more broken from the community they were invited to join than the constant harmful messages from society as a whole. I want aros battling with whether or not they’re “really aro”. I want aros who aren’t sure they count at all. I want aros who identify with specific labels but would never use it for fear of being “less aro”. I want aros who are scared of expressing their feelings because they dont want to be outcast. I want nonbinary aros who are sick and fucking tired of the constant nbphobia theyre seeing in the community. I want aros who are tired of watching communities step on eachother for rep.
i want grey-ace aros who aren’t sure if this community sees them as an allo aro or an aroace or somewhere in between. i want romantic aros who aren’t quite sure why theyre always being placed as closer to the other group, never belonging, why they’re always viewed as other. I want a-specs who arent sure if theyre going to be viewed as allo or ace or aro or the “wrong kind” of a-spec, who aren’t sure if theyre viewed as an alloaro or alloro ace or what. I want ace-spec aros who just figured out theyre aro to be horrified at the way that aros talk about alloro aces, who feel violated because thats how you used to talk about them, too.
I want aros who feel personally sickened and attacked by the way that theyre viewed by everyone. I want aros who feel like they’ve been physically beaten from how pained they are regarding aro stereotypes. I want angry aros (allies) who didn’t realize there were aro stereotypes. I want angry aros (allies) who are pissed at how aro-spec people get treated by everyone. I want hurt aros who are constantly being told they aren’t enough. I want aros who have heard the “not 100% aro” and “100% aro” terms so incredibly often that they’re sick to their stomach, because they aren’t even fully aro according to you. I want arospecs who call out the pain they see being caused. I want aros who make the connections with the rest of the queer community. I want aros who are proud of all of their identities. I want aros who are proud of none of their identities. I want romantic aros who are tired of being excluded.
i just want an aro like me.