Home for the weekend.
Derrick’s immune system recovered enough from the first chemo induction, and he was stable enough, that the doctors allowed him to be discharged and come home for the weekend. What a gift. It’s been very bittersweet — getting to see him comfortable and happy, playing and snacking, fooling around with his big brother here at home has been really wonderful. Too though, we know there are some major hurdles to clear before the next time he will be able to be home.
We go back to the hospital tomorrow for readmitting and chemo induction 2 begins Wednesday. After he recovers from that, then we will do more blood and bone marrow tests, which will confirm the path forward. Likely we will move on to the stem cell transplant, which is about a year long journey, at least 2-3 months of which will be spent inpatient at the hospital. The next time he will be home with us will be in the summer, if all goes well.
We have felt the love and well wishes coming to us from every corner of our lives and I’m endlessly grateful for that. This is all I’ve been able to think about; the state of this country is absolutely horrifying but I hardly have time to think about any of it these days. Probably for the best.
I’m sitting here trying to update on “the rest” of what’s been going on and I’m coming up blank. Holden is doing well with school still - my MIL has been caring for him during the school week to keep him home and in the normal routine while B and I are at the hospital and Ronald McDonald house. I’ve all but disappeared; I’m finding it easier to eat more lately but I know another round of chemo will be starting and I find it so challenging to eat much of anything in the hospital with Derrick while he’s going through it, especially when he’s unable to be mobile or keep food down himself. I feel weak physically, prone to a lot of dizzy spells especially upon standing. I’m doing my best to take care of myself. It’s what it is, and frankly I will be fine. What matters is that Derrick will be too. I feel strong mentally and emotionally, so that’s something.
Today I’m getting some work in before heading back to the hospital tomorrow. Work has been nothing short of amazingly flexible and understanding. I am endlessly grateful for my boss and my company. They have shown up for me in ways I couldn’t have imagined.
Bright spots among the darkness. Celebrating the wins, big and small.
We can do hard things.
