Gerade wird mir ziemlich bewusst, dass heute schon das 3. Weihnachten ohne dich ist. Naja, ansich bin ich überhaupt kein Weihnachtsmensch sondern viel mehr ein Grinch und dazu stehe ich auch. Aber gerade denk ich darüber nach, wie es wäre, wenn du hier wärst. Ich bin mir ziemlich sicher, dass du mir beigebracht hättest, Weihnachten wieder zu lieben. Wenn ich in deine strahlende Augen schauen würde, würde ich bestimmt den Zauber von diesem Tag spüren. Wenn du meine Hand nehmen würdest um mit mir durchs Wohnzimmer zu tanzen, nur um dich dann erschöpft in meine Arme fallen zu lassen, dann wär ich glücklich. Mehr als glücklich. Ich denk an dich und du fehlst mir Baby.
I came out as bi to my parents, mostly due to the timeless episode last night.
I’m writing this to document it for myself because it has been an insane two hours, but also for people who may need the same little push, so here we gO
I was sitting on our porch scrolling through my phone
and I stumbled upon this tweet
I read it. and reread it, and reread it. And it clicked with me that I am 22 years old. 22. And I’ve known this since.... well, forever? I’ve known that I was bi. But I was terrified because a vast majority, at least 90% of my family, is extremely homophobic. My dad’s side is VERY HOMOPHOBIC and he only changed his views when he met my mom, who is more accepting, but I’ve always considered them to be “accepting-ish” (depending on circumstances) so I NEVER knew how this was gonna go.
But, after reading this tweet (with the help of a little wine I’d been sipping) I stood up and literally marched into the house (this is how I make a majority of my Big Life Decisions, I just do them and don’t think) and I told my dad to come into the kitchen where my mom was preparing dinner, grabbed their hands and said “I need to tell you something” to which they went “Oh god WHAT HAPPENED” and I replied “Nothing... nothing bad....I’m bi”
and I am SO FUCKING LUCKY
my mom said “okay” and I immediately started sobbing and then they both hugged me and said “did you really think we wouldn’t love you after we found out?”
“I didn’t know, but.... the rest of our family.”
Mom: “fuck them”
Dad: “I will make you cards [that say fuck you]”
and a WEIGHT
by god a weight was lifted off my shoulders and I FEEL AMAZING
and I’m shaking and freaking out and crying so I started tweeting obsessively thanking the author of that tweet and ranting
and malcolm
and then MALCOLM
and then
and he was going through my profile and liking all of my ranting about it non-tagged AND THEN I got some 100 odd notifications of people liking my tweets and tweeting me saying how happy they were for me and I am just... I have never in my life felt as loved as I do in this moment.
and I am so fucking happy
and GOD DAMN
here is the rest of the rant because I can no longer words and I feel like sleeping for a week but also dancing around and by god I love everyone in this lifeboat
and this
WHAT
A
DAY
I LOVE YOU ALL
//EVERYTHING BEYOND THIS POINT IS NEW AND MAKING ME CRY MORE //
OH MY GOD SAKINA REMEMBERED THAT I REPLIED THAT I WAS CRYING IN NEW YORK WITH HER LAST NIGHT
guys i just
don’t have words
thank you all so much for your support, your likes, your replies, your tweets
