#10.30.2013

[itwasjustmisplaced]

You coming to get back with Nick?

[kayleigh-paras-blog]

Make It A Sweet Goodbye, a self para

Word Count: 1,064

Warnings: homophobia, mentions of rape

Characters: Brady Szuhaj, Bernie Szuhaj, mentions of Dalton Wixom, Clayton Collins, Drew Cottrell, Willow Szuhaj, Jesse Rutherford

Setting: 10/30/2013, Late Nite Reading tour bus, noon

Sing me to sleep, I'll see you in my dreams, Waiting to say, "I miss you. I'm so sorry."

     Brady slumped in his chair, shuffling around the notepad with what was supposed to be his wedding vows written on it. The thought that he’d be getting married in one day frightened him, but he’d never admit it. He was ecstatic, really, but there was a lot of worry inside him. The bus was empty, Jesse having ran to Chipotle for the two of them, and Dalton, Clayton, and Drew out playing laser tag; the corridor was silent, except for a light rapping on the door. It couldn’t be Willow- the little fox would just let herself on, and why would the guys knock?

     Brady jumped up from the warm sofa with a groan, approaching the door and coming face to face with none other than Bernie Szuhaj- his father. His expression immediately twisted into that of disgust,his nose crinkling and lip curling, the sight of the man making him sick to his stomach.

     “Ah, just the boy I was looking for. Gonna let me in, son?” The older male raised his eyebrows, his deep voice ringing in Brady’s ears.

     “You lost the right to call me your son when you allowed that bitch to kick me out of the house,” Brady spat. His head felt light and his heart pounded in his chest. He hadn’t seen his father in a year and a half- why was he suddenly resurfacing?

     “Don’t refer to your mother like that.” Bernie scolded Brady, almost as though he was still under his father’s care. The larger man shoved past the smaller, using his stocky weight to his advantage and nearly knocking the bassist over.

     “What the fuck do you want? Why are you here in the first place?” Brady’s stomach turned over itself, his nerves getting the better of him. He watched as the man picked up the notebook with Brady’s vows and tore the top page off.

     “I heard from your mother that you planned to get married soon.”

     “Tomorrow, actually.” Brady nodded, pursing his lips and flashing the engagement ring on his left hand. “I told that bitch she was not invited, and neither were you.”

     Bernie chuckled. “There’s nothing for us to be invited to. You’re coming home. The wedding is off.” The heavy man snatched Brady’s hand, tugging the ring off and slamming it on the counter. “Let’s go.” If Brady’s heart wasn’t pounding already, it was now. He reached for the silver band that had been unreasonably taken from him, only to have his hand slapped away.

     “This is home. I don’t live with you anymore, remember? Willow getting hurt was all my fault, remember that?” Brady snapped at him, shocked at the man’s audacity to try and ruin everything the day before. “There is nothing you can do to get me to go with you.”

     “You don’t want to do that. I know every fucking secret of yours- and I don’t think you want those getting out, do you?” Bernie crossed his arms, cocking an eyebrow at his son. “You let your sister get raped. You’re a worthless little faggot, Brady. Do you really think he wants to marry you?”

     The use of the homophobic slur hit Brady like a ten-ton rock. He shook his head, tears threatening to spill, but he choked them back enough to speak.

     “I-I’m not worthless,” he managed to sputter out. “Jesse wants to marry me. He.. he loves me.” His vision became blurry, his eyes glassed over with his tears.

     “Ha! He loves you. Like anyone could love a pathetic queer like yourself.”

     “You can leave now.” Brady wiped his eyes, trying to hide the fact that his father’s cruel words drove him to tears. “Get. The. Fuck. Out!” His voice escalated to a shout, pointing his finger towards the door. The bassist was on the verge of breaking down and really did not want to give Bernie the satisfaction of making him cry. Thankfully, the older man obeyed and stepped off of the bus, but not before giving his final remarks.

     “If you want to ruin your life, go for it. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.” The stocky man shrugged, shutting the door behind him with a loud slam.

     Brady allowed himself to collapse to the floor, his face falling into the palms of his hands as his body shuddered in heavy sobs. Bernie’s words stuck with the young man, two statements in particular replaying over and over in his mind.

     You’re a worthless little faggot, Brady. Do you really think he wants to marry you?

     Like anyone could love a pathetic queer like yourself.

     It took Brady twenty minutes to finally compose himself. He tugged the end of his shirt up to dry his cheeks, allowing the fabric to fall back in place when he was finished. His hands shook as he searched the bus for a pen, finally finding one in the back lounge. Grabbing the yellow paper on which he was writing his vows, he began to write Jesse a letter.

     I’ve started these vows over and over a thousand times because I never could figure out what to write. Nothing sounds right. But that’s because the way I feel about you can’t be summed up into words. You drive me absolutely wild and every day I find myself falling more in love with you. Today’s the day, baby, we can finally stop correcting ourselves when we accidentally call me Brady Rutherford. Today’s the real thing. Love’s never been something that came easy to Jesse- these would be my vows, if I was going to be reading them. I can’t. - Brady

     He laid the note on the counter, setting the silver engagement ring at the top right corner of the page. He gathered his things, or at least what he could carry in a small backpack, and stepped off of the bus, and started walking.

     Not in a specific direction, of course, but Brady walked for ages. He walked until he couldn’t feel his feet anymore, until he didn’t know where he was or where he was going. The constant vibration of his phone in his pocket reminded him of the life he was leaving behind, reminded him of Willow and Jesse, the devastated looks on their faces when they realized he was gone.

     Reminded him of the pain to come.      Reminded him of how right his parents were.

[hoopsternation-blog]

New Post has been published on HoopsterNation.com

New Post has been published on http://hoopsternation.com/jeremy-lin-%e6%9e%97%e6%9b%b8%e8%b1%aa-extended-highlights-houston-rockets%e7%81%ab%e7%ae%ad%e9%98%9f-vs-charlotte-bobcats%e5%b1%b1%e7%8c%ab%e9%98%9f-10-30-2013-hd/

Jeremy Lin 林書豪 Extended Highlights | Houston Rockets火箭队 vs Charlotte Bobcats山猫队 | 10.30.2013 [HD]

[hoopsternation-blog]

New Post has been published on HoopsterNation.com

New Post has been published on http://hoopsternation.com/jeremy-lin-%e6%9e%97%e6%9b%b8%e8%b1%aa-extended-highlights-houston-rockets%e7%81%ab%e7%ae%ad%e9%98%9f-vs-charlotte-bobcats%e5%b1%b1%e7%8c%ab%e9%98%9f-10-30-2013-hd/

Jeremy Lin 林書豪 Extended Highlights | Houston Rockets火箭队 vs Charlotte Bobcats山猫队 | 10.30.2013 [HD]

[dopeytheayaka]

10.26.-11.05.2013

Hooooly shit okay this is the longest that I've been unable to write my daily posts.

One thing I can say for sure is JSA is taking up a lot of my time, and all my classes this year are bitches...so much busy work to do T_T

Oh well, I guess I just have to deal with it.  Honestly, I don't remember what I did for every single day that I missed but:

10/26: Heidi and her family took me to a Sarah Brightman concert! =D She was so cooollll......she sang Mori no Toorimichi too! asdfalsdfh it was so great.

10/27: Uhhhh...?

10/28: Asaki's birthday! =D I spent this day studying for my midterm for Globalization that's only worth 10% of our grade -____-

10/29: JSA meeting...I had been out since 9am to 7:30pm? That's almost just as bad a working person TnT Aghhhh.

10/30: I broke down cuz I was just so fucking stressed with another JSA thing I had to attend, studying for the accounting quiz for the following day, and other things that were coming up lol. Ooooops.

10/31: I didn't do shit for halloween -___- Cuz I had another JSA meeting...but I felt productive cuz I was throwing out hella ideas for the sports day thing we're holding at the end of November =D

11/1: Okay, this is the crazy day. Sold donuts and tickets for club night...yes, again, for JSA -.- from 11 to 12:30, then went up the ave to get sponsors....hahaha FOR JSA, and theeennnnnnn went back to the JSA table...LOL omg seriously I am gonna become JSA itself soon. Went to volleyball practice, came home, got ready for club night with Heidi =D Stayed from 10 to 1am? Yep. Hella shit happened then. Unbelievable, miraculous, ridiculous things. I'll probably never forget about this day loool.

11/2: I think I died this day cuz I don't remember anything.

11/3: Dim sum with Kristina, Lauren, and Erina! Then we made won ton when came back =3 hehehe.

11/4: I crashed, as in broke as a human being, yesterday. I was like laughing out of nowhere, idk it was like I was drunk or something o_o I was so crazy. I was relatively alright in volleyball though. We won! =D And then stayed until like 8:30pm playing basketball -_-

11/5: Guessing the craziness from yesterday was a warning for today cuz I didn't feel to well this morning, I skipped accounting for the first time T_T Oopsie...Oh and I was throwing all these korean phrases that I started annoying Heidi out hehehehehe =P Okay now I'm just killing time until my JSA meeting. I'm so behind in my classes. I didn't do like 2 homework assignments this week....so bad T-T

Hopefully, I can get my life together in a better manner, and that tomorrow will be a better day! =]