HOROSCOPE TASK 002 ¬ sum’s greatest fear
LOSS
sum’s fear of loss comes from when she lost her father in a tragic car accident. it hadn’t been anybodies fault, nobody was drinking or texting or distracted, but the roads were icy and witnesses said he’s swerved to avoid a fox. she used to wish she had someone to blame for the icy hole in her heart that he left, for the emptiness she felt inside when someone talked about their parents or when she wondered who was going to walk her down the aisle.
the hardest part for her was the future that was taken from her. her father’s wise words would never ring in her ears again, he’d never put a comforting hand on her back when she was upset. never again would they be able to sit together and meditate and talk and just be. he would never see her graduate. never be able to tell her how proud everyone says he would be. they’d never be able to have those philosophical dinner table conversations that drove her mother to near insanity. he’ll never see her get married, never even meet her future partner. he never taught her cello like he always promised he would. there was so much that was ripped from her on that fateful day, and she’ll never get over that feeling of aching loss.
now she fears it, to her very core. she’s scared of people dying, sure. more than that she’s terrified people will leave her, move on. she holds fast onto every friend she’s ever known and doesn’t allow them room to leave her because the idea of having something and then losing it scares her. when she starts to feel people pull away from her she’ll do everything in her power to keep them in her life, in whatever way possible. she doesn’t deal well with people needing space, because as soon as she’s alone she just sees so many nevers and so many things she could lose.
