I just had to climb over a tractor to use the bathroom, and no, none of that is a euphemism for anything.

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I just had to climb over a tractor to use the bathroom, and no, none of that is a euphemism for anything.
“You can’t fix that in code.”
— another mentor, upon finding that we wired the two window motors to each other, not to the PD board
Me, looking for the drawer in the toolbox with the files in it: File, file file
Senior Kyle, every time I say "file": Yes? Uh-huh? WHAT?
Me: ... file ...
Kyle: Katie. WHAT?
Utility child, seeing the confusion: *opens the file drawer for me* Kyle, she's saying "file"
I’m trading small-child stories with @zeethebooknerd and I have no idea why it came to mind, but I just remembered the time LK saw me pressing bumper hems, pulled a $1 bill from his wallet and said “can you iron this too? I don’t like when my money is crinkled.”
Head coach: ordering from U-Line. $122 so far. Anyone need anything?
Freshman driver: ice cream?
Head coach: *loudly clicks “submit order”*
Driver: aww
The computer mouse in the team’s workshop is sticky and no one can tell me why, so I’ve carefully set a paper napkin over it and carried on with my computer use
Me: *chugs chocolate milk*
Monkey: jeez, Katie. It’s not vodka.
Me: gross, why would I chug vodka? Vodka is disgusting.
Monkey: you right. ITS NOT MALIBU.
Me: theeeere you go
Head coach is making me do ALGEBRA.
Send prayers.