Here is the shortened version of his dating life during summer. It all started when a friends gf looked at my brother and went “I have some friends to set you up with that I think you’d like” He went on a date to a bar to meet up with her “lovely and very cute friend Alexis”. He gets there and then (his exact words) “I hear my name, look up and there’s a dude. Big dude. Muscles and hair and everything. And he starts going on about how he heard so much about me. Took me 5 minutes to realize that he’s Alexis. Dude caught on that I thought he was a woman but it’s cool. We had drinks, It was a fun night so at least I made a friend” I thought that was funny/cute bc he really does love making friends. So he forgot to mention the dude part of the issue to the girl when he told her it didn’t work, so she obviously set him up with another guy. He was somehow still shocked even tho he forgot to tell her, the guy realized it like 20 minutes in, didn’t want to make it uncomfortable so he goes to leave and my brother being an “ALLY” (yes, he did that to his face) suggested they hang as friends. Third time HE STILL FORGETS TO MENTION IT, so she sets him up with her really good friend Nick. So he knows it’s a man but he didn’t want to be rude since shes going all out for him, so he went on the date and plans to tell the guy about the mix up but when he got there (this is a real fucking voice note he sent me at 1 am that day) “I forgot! I had a speech cause I didn’t wanna be a dick but I saw him and I just forgot what the fuck I was gonna say. Bro it took me 3 tries to tell him my name, idk what the fuck happened, I think its some type of a stroke that only lasts like a minute” So they went to a bar and somehow during drinks (his plan was a drink & come clean but he got “distracted”) he agreed to go bowling. Yes, he agreed to a 2nd date bc he was distracted. A week later HE asked Nick if he wanted to go hiking. This whole time they are texting nonstop btw. They went hiking in the morning, spent half a day together, the guy made them lunch. Do you see where this is going because my brother somehow did not. A week later my friend whos a bartender saw them at her job and she said that my brother was being shown how to play pool by some guy. As in the guy was wrapped around his body showing him how to do it. I really hope you know what I mean by this! And my brother was apparently all blushy and kept missing shots. Oh btw, my brother? REALLY fucking good at pool. He’s on a team at his local bar with his friends. So he played dumb, for sure! 2 days later at family bbq, he walks in goes to my uncles and says “yo dudes, respectfully asking but how the fuck did you know you wanted to fuck each other? Because I’m about to either do the worlds dumbest thing in my whole life OR the coolest thing ever and I would like to know if I’m just gonna have fun in the middle part of it or the after too?” he explained the whole thing and everyone went “dude, hate to tell you but you’ve been dating him for like 2 weeks” He tried to argue it with “no, I just..He just..I get distracted when he talks bc he keeps smiling and laughing at my jokes and i think my stutter comes back cause i cant form a sentence (he has never stuttered in his life) so I keep forgetting to tell him” two days later, he walks into the house and goes “yo dad, I fixed your car oh and btw gang? Ya boy? Not straight, i was wrong but don’t ask me anything more cause honestly? I don’t fucking know, I’m winging this bitch” Anyway, this was late June, they’ve been dating ever since. Sweet Nick genuinely thought my brother was shy (lol) and that’s why he didn’t kiss Nick while on the hike, so he was waiting for my brother to relax (lol). Meanwhile my brother was having a crisis without the crisis bc he genuinely up until the pool date thought, they were just hanging out and that he was just feeling (his words) ‘the feelings of a cool bromance’ whenever he went all blushy, giggly and dumb over him.
Like bro, bro, bro. You are an ALLY (makes fist) and hang out with drag queens and love queer culture (like a 20 year old TV show)... I think the dots were all there to be connected and Nick came along and genuinely thought he was dating your brother and your brother just caught on. Also. bro, when you didn't immediately correct this woman who is setting you up with men.... mayhaps that could have been a clue. Correct me if I'm wrong non bisexual/pan/fluid folks, but if you're set up on a date with someone whose gender does not align with your attraction, you're correcting the matchmaker first chance you get. right? Like I enjoy the company of a man (not in a Blanche type of way), but if someone set me up on a date with one, I would be like "very respectfully, you are barking up the wrong tree."