Discover Top Posts Tagged with #3-6-16

i think ive gotten used to the fact that im going to be alone. i mean i dont really care for anyone so it doesn’t really bother me but it kind of does because i wish i cared for someone and they cared for me. i just dont care about anyone though i dont find anyone cute enough or something. i guess it just sucks that im not in love right now and i mean i guess thats a good thing because that means no distractions but it was fun when i was in love and i want to do it again but i dont think its going to happen. not during school. not during residency. not during med school. and not when im a doctor. i dont see it happening anymore. but i mean who knows what will happen. probably nothing. i just wish it would happen. maybe in the future i will really want it and i will just cry myself to sleep every night like i used to but lets just wait until then lets talk about it then. that sounds good.

#somewhere between 12am and 5am #3-6-16 #sun

i know that i am happy right now, but i dont know it surprises me wheneve ri remember things. like whenever i wash dishes and i come across a knife and i think about how 2 years ago i would have completely jus wanted to kill myself andi felt like there was nothing to live for no one there for me just nothing at all. but now i feel happy andbetter although its not because the people there for me although i love being able to be called a friend and see friends. but. i know that i have me now and before i guess i didnt realize i had because really i didnt have me i was jus so scared and empty now i am okay however sometimes i think about the future and i get scared. not to the point of suicide, not nearly, but to the point of hiding. and really whats the difference between killing yourself and hiding away for the rest of your life? i dont i mean obviously there is the difference of one breathing and living and the other being dead but i mean are you really living if you are hiding for your whole life? probably not. i am scared for my future. im scared of what can happen. im scared. i dont know. nothing is set in stone. i dont know what can happen tomorrow, within the week, within a few months a year a few years or even a few moments. i mean one short moment can change my whole life and i have this idea of how everything will play out, i am supposed to be this great person this amazing person who succeeds in everything, who gets fit, i make perfect score on mcat and into medschool or 2 of them and i go to med school and i go with my friend and we live together and i mean we stress some but for the most part it is fun and the whole way there is fun and then we become doctors and although i am spending a few years in medschool pretty much closed off from my family, i come back to them after and its like i was never gone and its amazing in every which way. and then after i am a doctor i can go places and do things and buy things for my mom and my dad and do things for my sister and take my brother out and be able to go places with my friend. it really scares me because i know thats what i want. thats what i really want. and im scared that thats not going to happen. the other day i heard about this guy who is in the high school i went into who was in football and good at it and he got into a car crash and he lost both his legs. i knew about 3-4 football players who were really good and when i was a senior the football team was really good, and those players got full ride scholarships to like big universities. and its like this guy who lost his legs, why would thaty happen to him. he is this young guy really good at sports and his whole future ahead of him and it is all screwed up because of a car crash. and i think a car crash is the worst because how unexpected it is. they didn’t plan on getting hurt or dying or losing someone. they didn’t have time to think this through, and its like this poor guy doesn’t have legs and it is surreal. i cant imagine what he had to go through or what he IS going through. and this is selfish but i mean i dont want a car crash to happen to me, like some accident. i dont want that. i dont want that to happen to anyone i know and love. not at all. and i mean i jus i wish i could set my future the way i want it. like it happens how i want. you can only prepare and do so much. the things that you can control. thats what i like because i can control them. and its the things i cant control that scares me im worried about it im scared so scared about it because i really dont want anything to happen. what am i supposed to do with those things that i cant control like ignore them, prepare for if they do happen, or give up? maybe i should jus accept the fact that i cant change it i cant do anything about it. i guess i can do that. itd probably ake me happier. im pretty happy as it is. i just get worried some times.

tomorrow i go to church and i dont want to go. i just i dont know.

#3-6-16 #sometime between 12am and 5am #sun

Omg, I’m a hooligan. Like 3 hoots

#3-6-16 #it's actually #3-7-16

Today I am sharing a “gallery” of photographs showing my husband Ed’s flight over Ft Pierce, Sebastian, and Stuart’s St Lucie Inlets. The photos were taken yesterday, March 6th, 2016, around 2pm.

A picture speaks a thousands words…(In this case through about 106 frames.) Yesterday was an absolutely beautiful day, yet area waters estuarine and ocean were not necessarily so. —-Certainly not those surrounding the St Lucie River/Indian River Lagoon near the St Lucie Inlet.

The discharge levels and reports for Lake Okeechobee can be reviewed at the Army Corp of Engineer’s Jacksonville website here: http://w3.saj.usace.army.mil/h2o/reports.htm. Lake Okeechobee is reported at 15.68.

The ACOE will be releasing less according to a recent press release.

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Ft Pierce, Sebastian, and Stuart’s St Lucie Inlet, 3-6-16, Ed Lippisch

Ft Pierce, Sebastian, and Stuart’s Inlets, Gallery of Photos, 3-6-16, SLR/IRL Today I am sharing a "gallery" of photographs showing my husband Ed's flight over Ft Pierce, Sebastian, and Stuart's St Lucie Inlets.