I'm going to try and journal on here more often!! It will be filled with my thoughts and ruminations on things, irl stuff, energy work musings and techniques, and spirit work and astral stories. You can read them and more in the #journal tag.
Anywho, read below the cut for: TL;DR observations from acupuncture today, finding out my school might be closing, and guided vs dragged and a reminder to myself to be intentional
I've had the flu (or at least I'm pretty sure what that is) this week, and today is the best I've felt all week. Still was having a slight fever and some cough/congestion, so I went in for acupuncture at my school. Some fun tidbits from my session today:
-TCM diagnosis is an External Heat Invasion, which is what I totally guessed it was! I'm learning (:
-When I had ST36 needled, on both sides my entire stomach/abdomen immediately warmed and lit up, which is a new sensation. Fun fact: ST36 is called "The Ruler of the Abdomen"
-Had my GB20 needled, which felt amazinggg but ouchy it was very tender after. I am interested in doing a Cranial Sacral Technique and some Reiki on this point, and will update more when I do this
-LR3 hurt like a b, which it normally doesn't for me (this is a very commonly used point), and my intern said it was cuz of the heat, which would make sense. (Also everyone at my school calls points that are painful "spicy" which made me laugh cuz the pun of spicy and heat. Anywaysss)
-There's three points on the forearm that when used together are called "Buddha's Triangle." Had it done today for the first time and it was super relaxing actually
Don't really have much more interesting stuff to report from that, aside from what I normally feel. It's always so wild to me to feel the energy pathways connecting to each other when needles are placed in them, like circuits connecting.
Speaking of acupuncture, now for some irl stuff. We all learned some grave news yesterday - there is a good chance that my school will be closing later this year.
Since the pandemic, the enrollment at my school has been incredibly low. My cohort and the year above me only have about 20 people - my school used to average 40-60 people per year.
Because tuition is my schools biggest source of income, these lower numbers puts them in hot water. Don't need to go into incredible detail, but that plus rising costs and the fact that the area the school is in is super rough, which makes it difficult to sell - things are not looking good.
Our president said that it's not guaranteed that the school will close, just a last-ditch option. But my intuition is saying that it will close.
I've had a lot of thoughts and emotions about this. I mean... coming to this school and studying TCM has been a goal of mine for like. 7 years. It's the whole reason I moved up here in the first place.
Naturally, I was upset and panicked to learn this. But after digging into it, it's because I had tied part of my identity to this. Like in the way that people associate "what you do" as a part of you - I had associated going to this school and studying TCM as a big part of my identity and who I am as a person. And when that was threatened to not be a thing anymore, my ego got scared. Who am I if I don't do that? What will I do?
But it reminded me that I am much more than what I do. And something else that I've been realizing and remembering the past couple weeks - the reason I came to this school was to learn about Energy, and Qi.
At the end of the day, that's what I care about. It doesn't necessarily have to be with TCM - acupuncture was just my jumping off point, as it was the first way I experienced Energy in that way, in a way that was also structured.
And so, if this is the Universe redirecting me elsewhere, I'm still having some emotions about it all, but I will do my best to welcome and roll with the change.
That being said, I'm not necessarily being totally hung out to dry. It's not official and there is no information about it yet, but if the school does close, I think they legally have to offer a "teach out" option, which basically means that another school would adopt us and help us finish our degree. So. We'll see what happens.
One other thing that I realized today, is: "In order to be guided, you have to be moving in the first place." You can't expect to be guided or helped without putting in any work or energy or intention yourself. That's not being guided or helped - that's being dragged. And while the Universe does do that sometimes, it rarely does.
So a reminder to myself - stop sitting and start walking, take initiative, be intentional, and stop waiting for confirmation before action, and instead act and let the Universe provide input and correction if necessary.
That's it for now! Hope everyone has a good night!
