#40 more

[moons-and-stars-and-shit]

Skweeeeeeee we’re getting closer 👀 👀 👀

Seriously tho people start thinking of what you want for a 200 follower special....

[scaramoutual]

glowing hornshroom...

[high-heel-mileage]

...in the gym

October 5, 2016

2009, New Orleans. 

Drunk girl: where are you guys from? 

Me: Ohio DG: Oh, I'm sorry.

Me: 

2016, England.

Gym receptionist: oh, where are you from?

Me: Ohio... in America.

GR: OMG that's so ace! What brings you to England?

Me: my husband is from here.

GR: yeah, I guess love is a good reason to move.

Oh, man but Ohio sounds amazing.

Me: 😂😊👍🏻💗 

#perception

Reason #infinity why I love living in England. It's going to be so hard giving up being a novelty when we move back to America. My ego is going to deflate so hard. Leg day in the bag with 400+ calories torched. I made up this round of circuits (run through twice) and, to be honest, it may have been a bit too ambitious. I'll let you know tomorrow when I try to get out of bed. 

Weigh-in // -5.2 pounds. I'm back. ✌🏻️

[high-heel-mileage]

... In the gym

October 2, 2016

I have lost 40 pounds since I gave birth in December 2015 - or rather, since I started trying to lose the weight in February 2016 after I was cleared to start working out again and finally stopped bingeing on cinnamon raisin bagel during ALL of Violet’s middle-of-the-night feedings. (Those little bastard bagels really add up!) I feel like I’ve spent the past nine months clawing myself to this point. Good lord, who knew weight loss was so damn hard? Oh, right, we all did. 

What’s that saying? Nine months up, nine months down to lose the baby weight? Well, not to pat myself on my well-padded back but I’ve done that already. However, I really thought I would’ve made more progress than this by now. 

Yes, I know that losing 40 pounds is worthy of all the celebratory emojis, so I suppose what I’m really upset about it my mindset and how I’ve let things slip in the past few months. I’ve been struggling with losing and gaining since the end of August (Thanks, Obama, America.) I feel like in a way I lost my weight loss momentum or mojo during our visit to America. I actually had to have a serious heart-to-heart with myself when I spent the majority of the plane ride from Cincinnati to Paris speculating and then panicking and obsessing over how much weight I might have gained. (Spoiler alert: it was 8 pounds. Seriously.)

I’m not mad at myself. That ship sailed a long time ago. My mantra for a while now has been, “You can’t hate your way to healthy.” Instead, I’ve been tired - tired of meal planning, tired of food, tired of trying, tired of losing weight being my hobby (because, let’s be real, when it takes up this much of your time it can easily be classified as a hobby, right?) So perhaps all I really needed was a timeout and break from it all. Because it is HARD DAMN WORK losing weight.

I have 40 more pounds that I would like to lose. And I feel like I’m ready to tackle phase two of HARD DAMN WORK once again. So I’m rolling out #40More - my attempt at keeping myself in check and motivated to stay on track. 

For the month of October, this is what phase two looks like:

Weight Watchers (more on that later)

Weekly weigh-in (posted on Instagram)

Barre Method 3x week

Circuits 3x a week - a mix of BBG and Nana Health

I’ll be posting more comprehensive updates here, but for the day-to-day of it all, you can follow me on Instagram.

Wish me luck ~ and if you’re in the same boat or need some help, let me know - there’s so much I miss from not being able to devote as much time to social media as I used to, so I can be oblivious to things going on around me sometimes. 

[high-heel-mileage]

... In the gym

And so I go and do it even when I don’t want to.

A couple of you have sent me messages asking how I’m hitting the gym this much and spending enough time with Violet (the comments were not judgmental in case anyone is getting defensive on my behalf…)

Violet goes to bed anywhere between 7-7:30 which gives me enough time to have a catch up with Phil and be in the gym by 8/8:30. I finish up by 9:30-ish, head home, put dinner in the oven, and shower while it cooks. I’m in front of the tv for a Game of Thrones marathon by 11 with Phil until we head to bed around midnight. I go to the gym four times a week, maybe 5 maximum.

I used to workout at home when Violet was sleeping more during the day but now that she’s awake more, I find it more difficult to focus on my workouts. Plus I’d rather spend the time playing with her than sweating on her.

💗

[high-heel-mileage]

Workout #3,827,393 or something like that. I’ve lost count. Isn’t that kind of the point though? That it just becomes part of your life and routine? I think the best part about this whole weight loss caper is that I’m remembering what an athlete I used to be. The sports, the competitions, the awards. I’ve missed it so much. Pushing myself harder and harder each time. Growing stronger everyday. It’s addicting.

This afternoon I was roaming the aisles of M&S looking for giant chocolate chip cookies. I had plans for this evening to snort some pain reliever, grab the heating pad and eat my way through a small country’s worth of calories while lamenting my stabby womb and bloating.

I went to the gym instead.

Not that some days don’t call for the choc cookie pity party - because they SO do - but I knew the gym would be a better choice for me today.

Now let’s talk images. The first photo set is all from tonight - it’s fantasy land verses reality. Instagram vs real life. In the first two pics my pants are pulled up hella high keeping it all tight. In the second two, my mom gut is poking out to say, “heyyyyy.” They’re both me. I need to start being nicer to the girl in both sets of pics. She’s doing all right for herself.

The tape measure pic is exactly how much of me I’ve now shed. Phil made me walk around Asda this weekend carrying 38 pounds of potatoes - that’s how much weight I’ve lost - and it was so uncomfortable. How did I ever?! Imagine how the next 38 is going to feel!

And finally, the photo that started it all. I’m proud of that girl. Sad for her but proud of her all the same. Making a choice to lose weight while trying to be a kick ass mama so far away from home has been incredibly tough at times, but staying the same - or worse, getting bigger - would’ve been tougher in the long run. I actually threw that blue top and those leggings away during my KonMari spree as if it was the outfit that was making me fat. I just didn’t want the reminder in my closet.

I’m not where I want to be, but I know I’m on my way there.

[high-heel-mileage]

Just got home from the gym where it was blazing as it's 80+ degrees here today. As we don't have that many days this hot, most businesses just open the windows. So I'm dying. It was also probably foolish of me to start/try out a new program (nana health on Instagram). No muscle memory for any of these moves so my body was all, "lololol nope." It was intense. It's a 6-week program and I'm thinking of doing it for the next three weeks and the three weeks we're in America as it doesn't require a gym. Then I might switch back to BBG. We shall see. Three weeks until America!!!!! Gotta make room for all the barbecue, fried pickles, biscuits and gravy and Mexican food I'm going to inhale upon landing. Also, I really need to stop wearing these shirts; they're way too big. Any suggestions for workout clothes that I don't have to take out a loan to buy? (Aka no Lulu, Sweaty Betty, Fabletics etc...) 💪🏻