The lessons of the koil.
Last year I wrote about what I learned after I big chopped. After cutting my hair numerous times because I liked how I looked with a caesar cut, I realized I never really embraced the natural hair movement. Last January, I decided to give it a try. A lot of the stuff I was being fed didn’t hold true but I stuck in there. I made mistakes and learned a lot about my hair and myself as a woman. My mistakes shouldn’t only help me, I’ve decided to share some of the things I've learned about being a natural with just about anyone who cares to listenn. Now, you may not agree with everything, thats okay but this is MY journey and these are MY lessons.
1. Unless your hair allows you to do a wash and go, the TWA era may be the toughest part.
When your hair is in the not a caesar cut but not really long phase things get a little complex. 4c hair isn’t really the wash and go type past a point because it can matte up. During this time, I was doing two strand twist outs that looked lovely but took a ton of time to do. That’s where the complaints about time come in.
A puff? Mine looked weak when I did it so I stayed away.
During this time is when you get bored, which takes me to my next lesson….
2. Think thrice before you color your hair.
Let me set the scenery for you… it’s a few weeks after my big chop, which already left me with a months worth of hair. My hair was looking okay but not exciting enough for me. I was used to blonde or red caesar cuts so the 1b baby fro was a drag. I went ahead and used box color on my hair.
This left my ends damaged. Not worth it. My ends felt so nasty and looked gross. But the blonde was popping though lol.
This damage led to more mistakes…
3. Don’t even consider a texturizer.
I wrote about my experience with a texturizer so I won’t say the same stuff all over again. Just don’t bother with one. It’s just a super duper fast acting perm. You put it on and if you leave it on one minute longer than needed you’ll have bone straight hair.
I didn’t leave it on too long but the texturizer on my damaged hair from previously coloring it caused more damage. My ends were DRY. It also stops you from truly enjoying your curl pattern.
4. Your curl pattern often changes with time.
Ive heard of other natural hair gurus saying their curl pattern has changed with time and didn’t think there was much hope for me. I mean come on us 4c hair girls are used to the let down of our hair not coming out how everyone else’s hair does. Well I will say I’ve seen a change in my curl pattern. It has softened over time. I can even spot my individual coils when well moisturized.
5. Healthy hair will become more important to you than long hair with time.
I started this journey hoping to grow my hair out past my shoulders then to find a way of straightening it for good. A year later, my hair is a few centimeters above my shoulders when stretched and I’m thinking about cutting an inch or two off because its been damaged. Damaged ends mean my twist outs aren’t as clean as they can possibly be. My hair doesn’t retain moisture the same. Last year, I would say wait it out but today the length isn’t nearly as important as the health of my hair.
6. As my hair grows longer, the anxiety I used to get about doing my hair has gone away.
The era of spending 4 hours washing my hair and doing twists is over. Washing my hair and twisting it takes an hour and 15 minutes. I usually just cowash and get my netflix ready for my twisting session. No biggie these days.
I remember in my initial post I said my twist out doesn’t last more than a day. Well my twist outs can last two days if I do the mini pineapple method. I get an extra day from doing that. It doesn’t mean it looks as good. The third day I can get a puff out of it.
((Side note: I remember when I used to see naturals say their twist outs last 3-4 days. I think what they meant was when they retwist their hair at night because the mini pineapple method only gets me an extra day. Send me a message if you know of another way or if I’m doing something wrong.))
7. Don’t expect to get the same results as others.
I remember listening to people who washed their hair once a week and thought to myself ‘hmm i need to figure out what day will be my wash day’. I followed the norm which was sunday. It didn’t last long because my hair would be on its last leg by thursday morning and I wouldn’t know what to do. Then I tried washing my hair twice a week. The twice a week was alright but when I started doing it whenever my ends felt dry, my hair was in heaven. I remember not knowing if I needed to wash my hair if it was in twists for 2-3 days. During twa stages, I feel like its optimal time to just listen to your hair. You don’t know exactly how your hair will react to certain products or methods so just feel it out. If it feels like its dry, give it some water and moisturizer. If it feels fine, go another day.
8. Sometimes less is more.
With all the products out there to try, I know it can be hard to turn themdown. Especially when you’re at target on payday and you stumble into the beauy aisle and Shea Moisture, Karens Body Beautiful and Oyin on sale. ((Side Note: Karen’s Body Beautiful’s leave in is BOMB.COM)) Something I learned is some of the products I used because they were around weren’t always needed. I would use like 4 products post wash while twisting. Some of the curl puddings I used weren’t needed. I got the same definition when I used my oils so I ended up putting a lot of products back under my sink.
Don’t get me wrong, I love certain products. Its just somethings aren’t necessary all the time. Some products I use are MUST HAVES for me but I know when I’m using too much.
9. You will gravitate toward your fellow naturals, if not, you should. Lol
You have so much knowledge to share. Talk to people. Don’t be afraid of talking to other naturals. It can seem intimidating with the Natural Nazis but screw them. There are tons of nice nonjudgemental naturals who can teach and learn from. We need to start using each other.