#8.17.2020

[shesilk]

i’ve read that a person can be

an island. and for a time i wasn’t

sure what the meaning of that

was. now, in the dark green rainy

season of august, i think i know.

at least i believe i’ve begun to

develop shores of my own.

jagged and penetrating rocks,

and white froth to coat my feet.

out here on my own, with nothing

to see for thousands of miles.

[shesilk]

things that dissolve me in a

warm syrup of memory.

storming outside the high

windows of a classroom.

scratchy carpet, where

we all sat in a semi-circle

and watched our teacher

search for her lost contact

lense. the clouds of dust,

rust colored and choking

during games of kickball.

and all the trails of sunlight

on the wooden table tops

that tell you to sleep, for a

moment, while she isn’t

paying attention.

[chunky-heels]

[getfitjournal]

It’s been a while! Today is Monday August 17th, 2020, the first day back on a deficit week. I’m starting to feel like I’m getting back in the groove, but my mindset is still off. I think I’m weighing myself too often and putting too much emphasis on that. I’m going to go back to weigh ins on Sunday morning only, and see how that works out for me!

Between work and other stressors I haven’t been able to really nail in a workout routine like I wanted to. :/ It’s okay, though, I’m still doing work outs, it’s just more whenever I feel like it than consistently. It’s hard to make it consistent when you work retail! Not to mention i’ve had a lot of lower back pain on my period this month.

I weighed in at 236.6 yesterday, and I’m hoping to come into this week strong!