#aahp

[ladygagain2011-blog]

[miranda-wrights]

Almost forgot my #mcm , this lil guy, Enzo 🎈🎈! • • • • • • • • • • #happy #guncle #nephew #uncle #instagood #followback #smile #balloons #baby #silly #peanut #chickennugget #up #aahp (at Unicorn Golf Club)

[chunkyandfriends]

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#AAHP Community Day is all done! 2 book readings in the can! Visit ChunkyAndFriends.com for more info this week! #health #fitness #nutrition #chunkyandfriends (at Silver Spring Civic Center)

[aahpnj-blog]

Happy Holidays

We here at the AAHP would like to thank you for being such wonderful additions to our family throughout these past few months of 2014! Whatever you will be celebrating, be it Chanukah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, Pancha Ganapati, or even if you just love that beautiful snow, The Academy of Art of Highland Park would like to wish you a very heartfelt Happy Holidays!  Please note that the Academy will be closed starting Monday, December 22nd until Sunday, January 4th, for the Holidays. Winter Session III will begin on Monday, January 5th. We hope to see you then.

[aahpnj-blog]

CONTEST: "Wherefore Art Thou?"

Spot the ArtMobile, snap a picture, and post it on Facebook, Instagram or Tumblr using the #AAHP. Most creative photo will be selected at the end of the month, and the poster will be featured on our social media for the following month and will be gifted an AAHP t-shirt! Good luck!

[snowjon]

Harry Potter characters in American Apparel posters.

[asleepathispost-blog]

My Experience With the Newest Fad in America

By Radon Randell

“Summer in Spokane is going to be awesome!” 

During the school year, this sentence is one that is murmured more times on campus than “Oh my God, look at Kevin Pangos playing Frisbee with his shirt off.”  However, do not let this sentiment lead you astray.

Summer sucks in college, and we all know it.

Whether we are stuck in the desolate wasteland of Spokane, Washington, or back home with no one but our annoying high school friends to hang out with, everyone just dreams of being reunited at Gonzaga again in late August. 

Sure, the beginning is fun, when you're figuring out who's in town and telling a plethora of stories (usually beginning with “Dude, I was super hammered one night...”).  The first week or two are bliss, but then it all goes down the toilet faster than that spider you just smashed with your shower sandal.

Dullness and boredom left this writer wondering, “What can I do to keep myself occupied during the summer?”  Then an absolute GEM came out of Florida.

That’s right.  I did Bath Salts.  

My first mistake was not doing my research.  I simply heard on the news that a man had cannibalized a fellow human being’s face after getting "high" on bath salts before I switched the television off and ran straight to Bed Bath and Beyond.

Turned out, I was not alone.  The store was packed with hundreds of teenagers who were obviously all watching the same news coverage I was. 

As I browsed the selection of various flavors, brands and forms, I was thinking to myself, “What will be the most pleasant to use?”  After some experimentation, I found my answer: none.  This was the most horrible experience of my life.  No joy.

I settled on raspberry cheesecake-scented salts, but then came my next dilemma.  How the f*** do I ingest this?!

Now I am no druggie, but I know how they are used.  I tried everything.  Diced it up nice and fine and snorted it, but that shit hurt more than being stabbed in the eyes while having an elephant step on your balls.

I tried smoking it out of a pipe but it wouldn’t light.  It just turned black.  So, my natural outdoorsman came out and I ran to the backyard, gathered some twigs and used it as kindling to help ignite the fire, like I did in my Boy Scout days.  Still wouldn’t take. 

I saw something in the movies once where someone melted drugs down on a spoon.  Tried it.  All it did was melt the plastic. 

So I gave up and went and read a book. 

God, what a rush.

#SpokaneSummer2012

[asleepathispost-blog]

Need For Sleep to be Eradicated Within the Decade

By Delilah Balderdash

Were you ever scared of monsters as a child? Well, now you can drink one. Did you ever dream of partying with a rockstar? Good news! Now you can for only three dollars. Did you ever want to fly? Fun fact: now you can get wings from a Red Bull. All this may sound Ludacris, but even he endorses the new sleep repressing movement that is sweeping the world: energy drinks. 

It is a wonder, though, that this movement has gained so much momentum in so little time. That’s why this reporter did some investigating.

Over the past few weeks, I have uncovered some terrifying revelations behind the use of energy-spiking drinks in popular culture:

My first revelation came from the recent cultural obsession with vampires, particularly the Twilight phenomenon. I wondered to myself, “Who in their right mind would endorse the creation of such a silly premise, making such an idea popular and acceptable in mainstream society?” It didn’t take long to discover that the perpetrators were not in their right minds. The United States’ government subsidized the creation of the movies, and why? The reason is all too clear: Vampires don’t sleep, and they don’t want us to, either. 

This idea is a propaganda technique used to perpetuate the notion that not sleeping is not only cool, but beneficial as well. Think of how much can be done if one doesn’t need to sleep! But what is it, exactly, that the government wants people to do with these extra hours in the day?

This puzzled me too until I read an article outlining the trend that China will surpass the American economy by 2016. However, China's is not the only economy that is growing faster than ours. The American government wants to keep up with other growing economies from around the world, so the less sleep its people get, the better. In order to boost the economy, Americans needed to work harder. And what better way to make a worker work more? Faux energy. 

The bailout packages weren’t just for banks. Energy drink-producing companies got a nice chunk of change for their work in the “American Comeback.”

Unfortunately, other countries struck back, and far more brutally. They manufacture weapons more powerful than any Monster or Rockstar; they make video games. True, American companies contribute to this market, but it is only a knee-jerk reaction with the mindset of, “Well, if you can’t beat ‘em... make better video games for Amurica!" The American-made games promote repetitive and menial, yet goal-oriented, tasks for the players. It is often against some foreign enemy, whether that be the invading Covenant or Nazi Zombies.

Conclusion: There is a government conspiracy to morph it's sleepless citizens into mindlessly patriotic worker machines.

This work, though, seems to be contained within pixelated parameters. From COD to WoW to Skyrim to Super Mario, these games contain any potentially active workers, thus maintaining the current status quo of the American work ethic.

While there is light at the end of the tunnel, resist the urge for energy! It’s a ruse. Lethargic work habits are the American way, and even fake energy, however powerful, cannot stop that.

Editor’s Note: Delilah Balderdash has been put on a leave of absence due to her paranoia issues resulting from excessive use of energy drinks.