#about lonny

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Bahar Soomekh as Heba Crane and Alan Alda as Alonso Crane Sr. AND Angelo Crane send tweet

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It’s almost the end of Sunday but…

Lonny isn’t good at receiving. He’ll take it! But he will immediately melt because he’s more used to being the person making sure his partner is taken care of

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There's a discussion to be had about Lonny attaching himself to people quickly due to his BPD vs his trust issues making him mistrust people

So essentially if you get past the layer of trauma, he's yours forever

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Due to recent knowledge, Lonny's full name if Alfonso. All references to his full name before I made that decision should be subconsciously changed to Alfonso

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When did they know they were lgbt? When did they come out/are they not out yet? How open are they about their "Queer Identity"?

Lonny knew he was attracted to men as well as women in early high school, but buried that down for years, due to the family he grew up in, especially his Italian Catholic side, who thought homosexuality was a sin. He first ever comes out when he's on his own, shortly before he moved to Colombia, but that was just stating he was into men as well, as he didn't yet have the bisexual label he'd eventually take on. Him first outwardly saying that was actually to a man he'd eventually have a fling with. But he isn't particularly open! He'll only specifically say it after he's close to someone. Bud and his wife knew for sure, but a lot of Belko did not. He's still very scared of what people think.

Thomas... knows people don't particularly care about him or for him. When he was young, he already knew that girlhood was something he hated, but he didn't end up telling anyone until after he was already a diagnosed schizophrenic, around the time he was 15. Surprisingly, his mother did accept that, though only because she thought it would lessen the other problems. He had another chosen name in between his dead name and Thomas, but he started living as Thomas when he was on his own, and that was around the time he came out as bisexual. He's fairly open about it; he doesn't particularly care.

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WHY ARE YOU HAUNTED?

Lonny

It was your fault.

You deserve this. It's almost a relief, being punished. What did you do, to bring this on yourself? Was it an accident, or something worse? Either way, you'll never be free of it. Spirits can be appeased or exorcised. But guilt? Guilt will haunt you forever.

Thomas

This is hereditary.

You were born to this, and you carry it as your family has done for generations. Legacy can be a thing both wonderful and cruel. This is a heavy weight, but you will bear it because you must. Because you were never given a choice. Can you even imagine your life without it? Do you want to?

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For those of you who’ve not watched the Belko Kill Count (on my pinned post), you guys just need to know about James A. Janisse saying “[the siren was] too much for his little Lonny Brain” when the fire alarm gets set off.

I so often think about the phrase “his little Lonny brain” when I’m writing him. Like he’s smart? But when he goes himbo mode. That’s his little Lonny brain. And you all probably can see those moments

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What is Your Duality?

Lonny

carnal and holy sinning (this is a love letter to myself)

you are the world's leading cross bearer of the most guilty conscience. you feel everything you touch turns to gold but in the way that it becomes molten and rich; and what i mean is that when you allow yourself impulse (which is not often) it leads to disaster. when you want someone it feels like sorrow, and you love the world like tacky honey, and you'll wish it could all feel less heavy. you look at yourself in the mirror and yearn to stake the heart and ascend with peace. someday, you'll rot into the earth, and the dirt will cave with you like a sigh of relief.

Thomas

wizened mentor and intrepid teenager

you may have been called an old soul as a kid, and now you're doing everything you can to benjamin button that back. in your head of heads you can hear yourself giving advice, but the heart of hearts says no, i will not miss out on myself ever again. i can do this. and it really is about finding that balance before you end up buying too many goddamned hatsune miku figurines trying to endorse that inner child. but please do buy at least two. i know you deserve it.