#absolute fucking

[bring-me-the-cats]

one of my favourite insult formats

absolute (and/or) fucking + noun (+optional second noun)

“you absolute fucking basket”

“ok there’s no need to be a fucking oven about it”

“oh you absolute sneeze-vest”

“you’re always such a fucking rat-loaf about stuff like this, chill out”

“you really are the biggest fucking poison-kettle I have ever had the displeasure to meet”

however if you randomly generate these nouns I have discovered this can backfire and accidentally create compliments(?)

you really are an absolute bird-queen aren’t you?

I always said she was an absolute honey-flower

I said come over here you fucking dinosaur-prince

[octobyrs]

look at my genius dog

[vyragosa]

when shimousa drops on na i will go so fucking. BALLISTIC FERAL WHATEVER WORD

[minstrelwarlock]

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I wish people still wrote songs and sang like this.  Everything is moving towards a grimy, indie, unproduced, "realistic" sound, and it seems that all the hipsters are slowly forgetting that being cool doesn't preclude sounding smooth.  And I'm sorry, but some people just can't sing well, and no amount of computer enhancement can fix that.  It takes time, like any instrument.  And when you spend the time, you end up with stuff like this.  And by "stuff like this," I mean, "a song that will last decades instead of days."