#absolute gremlins

[coi-koi-pond]

Okay I don't know about y'all but this dynamic makes me so happy on so many levels...

Full sketch sheet:

[ssttitdramon]

Ruth’s Makeup

Request: Ruth’s away for the day doing some theatre stuff. Meanwhile, Chuck and Auggie discover makeup for the first time. 

-Rules for requests here-

Ruth was running late for the last minute rehearsal of Alice in Wonderland 

Usually, she would’ve been at her school 10 minutes early

But today it seemed like the whole world was falling apart… Ruth couldn’t find her script or her favorite gloss

Finally, she found her script on a chair of the dining room and decided to do without her gloss today

"Okay I’m leaving now, so the two of you better stay out of my room please! Mom should be home later- try not to set the house on fire in the meantime."

As soon as Ruth drove off, Auggie finds Ruth’s clear gloss on the kitchen floor and shows it to Chuck

Chuck quickly takes out the applicator and swipes it across Auggie’s cheek

Auggie complains and furiously rubs his face with the sleeve of his shirt, making his cheek glow

"Just put it back in her room."

"Didn’t she say not to go in?"

Chuck rolls his eyes, takes the gloss and runs upstairs into the "girly cave"

Ruth’s desk was an "organized mess" as Stella likes to say

She had bottles of oil, nail polish, cream and perfume arranged inside the pink top lid of a shoe box on the right of the table

In the middle, a white makeup bag with a variety of blushes, small eyeshadows, and eyeliners spilling out onto the table

Another bag had several tubes of lipstick, foundation and mascara

On the left side of the table were two glass jars, one holding cosmetic cotton pads and the other kept a set of brushes standing upright 

Chuck runs his fingers through the soft brushes 

"Hey Augs, come feel this."

"I don't think Ruth wou-" 

"C’mon just get over here!"

As Auggie felt the brushes, he nearly gets a mouthful of the synthetic bristles Chuck pushes to his face

"Really soft, huh?"

Before Auggie can suggest they leave Ruth’s stuff alone, Chuck focuses in on a coral blush

"Isn't this what they use for zits?"

Auggie looks at it closely and nods with much confidence

Chuck eagerly applies the product over a pimple on his chin

Disappointed by the lack of cover-up and now sporting a pink spot on his chin, Chuck throws his hands up in defeat, "Totally useless, shit is a waste of money!"

Tosses the blush back into the bag, unknowingly cracking the powder inside the case

Chuck then picks up the eyelash curler and holds it up to his face

"This thing looks like a torture device."

"I've seen that in my mom’s bag, I think it’s used to trim your eyelashes."

Wanting to test it, Chuck opens the curler and holds it at the edge of Auggie’s eyelashes

"Dude, stop blinking!"

Accidentally clamps down with force 

"Nah, I don’t think it works anymore, it just bent them.”

Throws the tool down Ruth’s trash can

Auggie looks into the mini white vanity mirror, concerned about his bent eyelashes 

"Dude, I look ridiculous!"

Chuck picks up the first mascara he sees

"This should help straighten them out."

He nearly pokes Auggie’s eye with the black wand

"This is a great way to lose an eye- do you even know what you’re doing?"

"Duh, I saw Ruth try it out on Stella the other day."

Carefully slides the spoolie up Auggie’s eyelashes

"Now you look like you’ve got a black peacock's tail above your eye."

Rolling his eyes, Auggie notices the clips of beauty magazine tips underneath the makeup bags

"Green eyeshadow best suited for brown eyes?"

"This thing?" Chuck shows him the small round shimmering green eyeshadow case 

He opens it, gliding his finger through the creamy eyeshadow and sticks his hand towards Auggie

Auggie quickly elbows his hand out of his face, "I’m not your guinea pig, try it yourself."

Chuck shrugs and wipes the product over his left lid and faces Auggie

"Well? How do I look?"

"Hmm, kinda the same color as the Riddler."

An idea pops into Chuck’s head and asks Auggie to trust him as he grabs the red lipstick

A full-blown argument erupts over the lipstick and it takes a lot of begging for Auggie to let Chuck carry on

Annoyed with his pestering, Auggie finally lets the boy haphazardly slather the makeup across his lips

Satisfied with his work, Chuck takes out a brown eyeliner pencil and draws a sloppy question mark over his forehead

"Riddle me this, Joker! Why does the lady have this much makeup?!" he yells at the top of his lungs

Before Auggie can respond, the boys hear the front door open and close

"Chuckie I’m home!"

It was his mom

The two of them bolt to the restroom, shoving each other away from the sink as they try to wash off the products 

"If Ruth finds out we went through her stuff…"

"She won’t, you clown. Her stuff was already messy to begin with."

They get most of the makeup off by the time Chuck’s mom got upstairs

"Auggie dear… what happened to your eye?"

Auggie looks into the mirror, realizing the mascara had smudged around his eye

"We were uh…"

"I was trying to make him look like a skull, but we realized there wasn’t enough paint." Chuck interrupts with phony smile

Mrs. Steinberg laughs and shakes her head, "You boys are something."

"More like dead if your sist- OW."

[everyurlithinkofistoolong]

the absolute STATE of fug rn

[littletantrums]

I wish I had agere/nsre friends to just like,,,,, baby with and talk about cute things like toys and stuffies and nothin at all!! cause my regression is either talkin all the time and repeatin myself over and over or completely nonverbal and only little babbles and humming. honestly just as a whole i wish i had some regressor friends hhh

tbh this is the biggest reason i can't handle having a long-distance cg, and why i'm not little with my internet friends much at all. i just go SO nonverbal, and i get a lot more physically affectionate, and it stresses me out to type Words on a Phone.

tbh its a big reason why i cant wait to move in with zack lol i want some1 to 2 irl baby me

[turn-it-off-5s]

McKinley : We’re doing great, thank you for asking~

Now will you two please leave my office, I have work to do.

[nyxandshion]

Is there a material on this planet that the big buns won’t shred? I gave you a soft place to sleep WHY ARE YOU EATING IT?!

[unsuccesscr]

No one feed these things after midnight

@heroicquirk

[ssttitdramon]

Bickering

Note: this is just a little something I wrote in between requests because Chuck and Ramón are definitely a chaotic duo that would get on each other’s nerves while also immediately down for the clownery the other would come up with on the spot. No common sense or impulse control. Chaotic.

Stella knocked for the second time on the Hilderbrandt’s front door, growing impatient and squirming from the cold. Auggie finally opened the door, his exhaustion clear on his deadpan face. 

“So what’s this about these two fighting?” she asked, raising her eyebrows once she heard Chuck raise his voice.

Auggie sighed, “C’mere.” he grabbed her hand and led her to the hall where she could listen to their bickering.

“Well, that’s obviously stupid.”

“Says who?”

“Says me.”

“You’re being childish, Ramón!”

“I’m being childish? Funny coming from you, you’re the one who stuffed a freakin’ teddy bear to my face, I couldn’t breathe!”

“Yeah, well if you hadn’t-”

Auggie huffed, “All damn morning, Stella.”

“Have you tried getting them to stop?” she asked, hearing the next round of accusations fire from the two boys.

“You think they listen? There was an hour of silence earlier only because Chuck said something mean and Ramón gave him the cold shoulder. Next thing you know, they’re at it again.” Auggie complained, rubbing circles on this temple.

Stella smirked and walked down the hallway, peeking into Auggie’s room. Ramón stood by the window with crossed arms while Chuck paced around the room, arguing his point. “Why is Chuck wearing Ramón’s sweatshirt?” she whispered to Auggie.

“I have no clue, at some point he just put it on and they continued to bicker.”

Chuck noticed his friends by the doorway, “Oh Stella, you’re here. Back me up, this fool really thinks-”

“I’m not backing up anyone in this mess.” she interrupted, furiously shaking her head. “Fix this yourselves, Auggie and I will be in the kitchen.” 

In the next half hour or so, Ramón and Chuck continued to argue, their conflict changing from one thing to another, by then both Stella and Auggie gave up trying to understand them. While the two were in the middle of figuring out a large puzzle set on the kitchen counter, they noticed the boys suddenly go silent. 

“Either they’re tired or one of them has knocked out the other.” Stella got up from her chair and walked towards the room. A sudden burst of laughter from Ramón stopped her in her tracks, followed by Chuck’s giggling. 

Their infectious laughter became uncontrollable and had also caught Auggie by surprise, “They’re completely insane now.”

Stella and Auggie both peer into his room, spotting Ramón and Chuck sprawled on the floor, breathless and holding onto their stomachs. 

“You guys okay?” 

“Just-” Chuck started, before snorting and sending Ramón into another loud fit, “peachy.” he finally managed. 

The two boys continued in hysterics, laughing more and more every time they’d simply look at each other. Stella watched in amusement as her two friends uttered random, unintelligible words only the two would find funny. Behind her, Auggie smirked at Chuck’s attempt to sit up, only for his hand to slip and nearly hit his head on Ramón’s knee, inviting more laughter.

“It’s better and worse this way.” Auggie mumbled and made his way back to the kitchen, “No, it’s definitely better to get a headache from their laughter.”

Stella shrugged and closed the door, “I’ll just let them be.”

Ten minutes later, Chuck opened Auggie’s door, “We’ll be back!” he called out.

Confused, Stella and Auggie walked back to his room and found the window wide open. They see Ramón and Chuck running outside, already halfway down the road and nearly slipping on the patches of ice.

“My money’s on Ramón falling on his ass first.” Auggie wagered.

“Fine, mine’s on Chuck.”

The two watched as Ramón gathered a handful of snow and stuffed it down Chuck’s shirt. Chuck howled in pain and forcefully shoved his friend away. 

Auggie won.