altered carbon: chapter 3 from Harry’s point of view
I wasn’t used to being ignored.
Though it sounded incredibly pompous and arrogant, it was true. I was used to walking down the street and having five paparazzi cameras shoved in my face, or fans asking for pictures. The latter I never minded because without them, I wouldn’t be here doing what I love. The former bothered me, but I was unfortunately used to it.
Petra Gallego was ignoring me.
After my appearance on her podcast— where I had way more fun than I had been expecting to— I had sent her an email thanking her for her time and a chance to be on Alien Crossing. I hadn’t gotten a response, and I would be lying to myself if I said I hadn’t been expecting one. I knew I made her life hell in secondary school, but I liked to think that she would choose to see the good in me and understand that I was a stupid, annoying kid.
I was out at some Mexican restaurant with Jeff and his childhood friend Bailey. I was half-listening to the conversation, because like usual lately, my thoughts were on Petra Gallego. I thought about her occasionally over the years, regretting how my mates and I had treated her. I had tried to look her up in 2012, back when we were going on our first round of touring, but she was evasive on all social media accounts. Either she was very good at hiding in plain sight, or she was very good at making sure no one from secondary school could find her.
I almost didn’t notice when I saw Bailey’s arm snake out and wrap around someone’s wrist. In fact, I didn’t tune into the conversation fully until I heard Bailey say “Petra?” in a surprised voice.
When I looked up, she was standing there, looking nothing short of beautiful in her dark red dress and shoes that made her seem much taller than she was. I had always thought she was pretty (even back when I was making her life a living hell), but there was something about her now that was gorgeous. Maybe it was because she was no longer self-conscious about loving the things she did. Maybe it was because she was away from Cheshire and all of my old friends.
“Are you okay?” Bailey asked cautiously, because Petra looked like she was about to burst into tears. I had, regrettably, seen that expression on her face several times in my almost twenty-five years of life. “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.” Bailey stood up from her chair. “I’ll be right back, lads.”
I saw the moment Petra realized it was me sitting there. Though she still looked like she was about to cry, there was now a presence of unadulterated hatred in her eyes. I hated knowing I deserved it. “Petra?” I asked stupidly, because it was like I had conjured her with my thoughts. “Are you okay?”
She was turning on her heel and off with Bailey following her trail before I could blink. I hadn’t expected a response from her, but I wanted to kick myself in the shin. Of course she wasn’t okay. She looked like she had wanted to melt into the floor.
“Wonder what that was about,” Jeff mentioned. “You know her?”
“Went to secondary school with her.”
“She’s the one that has that podcast right?” When I nodded, Jeff seemed to connect the dots. “That’s where I knew the name from. Bailey’s girlfriend works with Petra at Outset. Helps out with sound.”
I remembered Veronica, a sultry looking blonde that I might have found attractive if I hadn’t been so focused on not looking like an ass in front of Petra as we recorded the episode. It didn’t seem like she and Bailey would go together, but given that Jeff had mentioned Bailey got along with anything that breathed, I guess it made sense.
“I’m going to go check on them,” I announced suddenly, standing up from my chair. I didn’t wait for Jeff’s response as I walked to where the ladies’ restroom was. Feeling like an idiot standing outside the door, I shoved my hands in my pockets and waited.
She emerged with her arm linked in Bailey’s, nearly knocking me over with the force in which she pushed open the door. Her eyes iced over, cooling the temperature in the room several degrees. “Christ, wear a bell,” she muttered.
“Are you okay?” I reached out my hand to take her by the shoulders and check for myself to see if she was hurt anywhere, but thought better of it. I let it fall back down to my side. I was probably the last person she wanted touching her. “What happened?”
“None of your business.”
I expected that too. “But everything’s okay now, yeah?”
The anger was normal. But the defeated look on her face had me wanting to get on my knees and beg her to forgive me. It was like she was a Petra-shaped balloon and someone had sucked all the helium out of her. “Leave me alone, Harry.”
I was frozen by the restroom as she and Bailey left to go talk to Jeff. It took me almost a full minute to recover, walking slowly and sluggishly back to the table. “The girls left. Some prat said something racist to Petra and Bailey’s driving her home.”
“Someone said something to her?”
Jeff looked disgusted. “I hate people sometimes.”
I nodded, agreeing wholeheartedly though my heart had sunk into my stomach. I remembered doing nothing when Nathan shouted awful things at her. I had never brought her race or culture into it, but Nathan had. And I hadn’t ever stepped up to him, or stood up for her.
It made me just as disgusting.
“Do you have Bailey’s number?” I asked. He raised a brow at the request. “I want to make sure Petra gets home okay.”
Jeff gave it to me without much more question. I sent a quick text.
Hey, it’s Harry. Hope you don’t mind that I got your number from Jeff.Will you tell me when Petra makes it home safe? Thanks for taking her back. What happened?
It wasn’t until Jeff and I had finished dinner, paid, and were back in our own respective cars when I got a response.
Some guy she was on a date with said some awful things. I’ve got half a mind to go find Peter Gerber and beat the shit out of him.
I filed his name away for later.
She’s good now, yeah?
Yeah. Thanks for checking in. Nice to meet you Harry!
I felt like I had to do something. Though Peter’s actions weren’t my own, they might as well have been with all the shit I’d done to her in secondary school. It’s why I didn’t even think twice when I texted Bailey back and asked for Petra’s shipping address and ordered a bouquet of flowers that cost a hundred and thirty quid.
There was a section that read What Do You Want to Say? I debated on it. There were so many things I could say. So many things I had to apologize for. But I didn’t want this to be about me. My apology had to be heartfelt, in person, and not simply because this Peter guy had made a mistake.
Petra,
I hope you’re feeling better. These are a thanks and a sorry. Thanks for letting me be on AC and getting to know the world of podcasts. Sorry for everything else.
- Harry
P.S. That Peter guy is an arse. Don’t let him get to you.
It wasn’t enough. It probably would never be. But I hoped it was a start.















