Ace!Fenris Fic Teaser: First Kiss
It’s both the first week of No Angst August and @dragonageaspecweek and I wasn’t sure how to participate since my Ace!Fenris is still in the outlining phase, but I decided to write a teaser for it! I was also inspired by @fendersassoc and the First Kiss theme for the first week of No Angst August, so here I’ve written an Ace!Fenris teaser for a Fenders Soulmate AU, and it’s their first kiss!
Fenders under the cut~~
Anders ran a thumb over the letters on Fenris’ wrist as Fenris looked away, embarrassed.
“It really is you,” Anders said in an awed whisper. “You were so dismissive I thought I had to be mistaken. Even though—” He turned his wrist to show Fenris the name there. “I'd never met a Fenris before.”
Fenris pulled his arm away and shuffled his feet in the sand, looking down at the waves gently lapping against his ankles. This was what he had been hoping for, yet what he'd been afraid of even before meeting Anders.
Anders turned to look at the sunset.
“I always dreamed about my soulmate,” Anders said quietly. “Tall, dark, and handsome, maybe a bit reckless. My imagination was never short of scenarios. How we’d meet. Our first kiss.”
“I don’t think I can do this,” Fenris said quickly. “I'm not—”
“I'm not saying we should go home and have sex tonight,” Anders said. “We don't even have to kiss. But can you give it a chance?”
“I didn't want a soulmate,” Fenris said. “Everything I've seen in the movies—I don't like it.”
“This isn't a movie,” Anders said. “Real life is better than that. Let me just try to show you.” He turned back to Fenris.
Fenris looked upset. He gripped his wrist as if he could squeeze away the mark. He was biting his lips too. Anders decided to try a different approach.
“What don't you like about the movies?” Anders asked, squatting down to play his hands in the salty water.
Fenris took a deep breath. Then sighed.
“The one thing every movie has.”
“Soulmates?”
“Sex.”
“Oh.”
Fenris sighed again.
“You don't… want sex,” Anders said. It was starting to make sense now. He noticed that Fenris looked unhappy.
“There's nothing wrong with you,” Anders hurried to explain. “It's just the way you are. Nothing's broken.”
“Every movie I've seen would say differently,” Fenris said. “It's what soulmates do, sooner or later.”
“See,” Anders stood up. “This is where real life gets better.” He scrubbed his hands on his shorts to dry them.
“I'm indifferent about sex,” he said bluntly. “And obviously we would talk about everything. I wouldn't do anything you're uncomfortable with.”
Fenris looked sideways at him, a little wary of something that sounded too good to be true. Despite the things that should irritate him about Anders, he liked the man. He was thoughtful and intelligent. Fenris was really just afraid of the day when Anders would ask him for sex.
“If you never want sex,” Anders said, “that's perfectly fine with me.”
“I have heard about your… experience in sex,” Fenris said dubiously.
Anders turned to Fenris and reached for his hand.
“Fenris. I was young. I wanted people to like me and it seemed like what everyone was doing. I didn't love it, and I'm not proud of it. Isabela might be, but I'm not. It's been at least ten years since then. I'd give it up completely in a heartbeat for you.”
“... for me?”
“Haven't you felt it?”
Fenris felt his heart throbbing in his chest. He could hardly think of anything else. This man respected him, would gladly enter into a relationship free of sex with him. Fenris wanted to try it. So badly.
He nodded, once, blinking. The sun was setting over Anders’ shoulder. Each stray hair was silhouetted against the flaming orange, and Anders’ face was in shadow. But his eyes were bright. Liquid gold beckoned Fenris to trust him.
Fenris’ own eyes were partially closed against the sun, but the green was no less bright. Anders reached up with his other hand to brush back a strand of white hair that had escaped from Fenris’ hair tie.
“What do you want from me?” Fenris wasn't accusing, just confused and afraid. He searched Anders’ face for any sign that he would betray him.
“Nothing,” Anders said. “All I ask is a little trust to begin with. I don't want to be the man that hurt you. I won't demand anything you don't want to give me.”
Fenris reached up, searching for Anders’ hand. He grabbed it and pulled it down. They were linked by both hands and eyes now, the ocean nuzzling their ankles. They were an island on the lonely beach. Anders’ shoes and Fenris’ surfboard sat abandoned in the sand. The moment stretched into several minutes of comfortable silence. They searched each other, their hands resting between them. The sun went down and the water started to feel cold.
Anders broke the quiet with a subdued chuckle.
“Do you like this?”
Fenris looked puzzled. “Like what?”
“Holding hands together. Is this good?”
Fenris nodded and adjusted his grip so that he held Anders’ hands more firmly.
“I would like to try,” Fenris said, glancing away towards the horizon.
“We can go as slow as you need,” Anders said. “So holding hands?”
“I like this,” Fenris said.
“What else would you like? I don’t want to cross any li—”
“I’d like to kiss you.”
“Okay, so kissing is—” Anders’ eyes widened as Fenris pressed up and kissed him. Fenris’s toes sank into the sand and Anders had to shuffle one foot to keep from losing his balance, but then he closed his eyes and leaned into it. The kiss was too short, but Anders opened his eyes when Fenris pulled away.
“Okay?” He asked, slightly breathless.
Fenris smiled, a flash of brilliant white teeth. “Yes.”
Anders slipped one hand out of Fenris’ and rested it on his waist, at the same time lifting his other hand into a formal dancing pose.
“How about this?” He asked. “Do you dance?”
Fenris looked a bit unsure. “Not well, but…” Fenris put his hand on Anders’ shoulder and looked at him expectantly.
Anders began to dance, carefully, since they were standing in six inches of moving water and on soft sand. Fenris followed him, quickly catching Anders’ rhythm.
“You’re good,” Anders said.
“You’re the one leading,” Fenris said, smirking. Anders turned and now he was facing the fading light of the sunset. He swept Fenris towards him and away, gaining confidence. He led Fenris into a turn. The water sloshed softly as Fenris spun and Anders reached to catch his waist again.
As he stepped closer to Fenris, his foot twisted unexpectedly on the sand and he fell, turning to land solidly on his backside in the water. Fenris jumped back quickly enough that he didn’t fall, though he did laugh and offer his hand to help Anders up.
Anders’ mouth hung open in surprise for a moment, and then he scrambled to grab Fenris’ hand and stand.
“The water is cold!” He complained.
“It’s getting dark,” Fenris pointed out. “We should probably be leaving now anyway.” Anders was still holding Fenris’ hand. He gently pulled Fenris towards the beach.
“Can I come up and make you dinner?” He asked.
“You want to use my shower, don’t you?”
“Mine’s broken again. Fair trade?”
“This time let’s not try to set the toaster on fire,” Fenris said, bending to pick up his surfboard with his free arm.
“It’s a good thing I live in the same apartment complex,” Anders said. “My toaster isn’t eight hundred years old like yours.”
“It works fine for me,” Fenris said as Anders picked up his shoes.
“And how many times have you used it?”
“Enough,” Fenris said, smiling again.
“I won’t make toast tonight,” Anders said, then stopped and waited until the tug on Fenris’ arm prompted him to stop and turn to look at Anders as well.
“This isn’t a date,” Anders said. “I want to make sure you know that.”
Fenris cocked his head, as if asking why Anders was so concerned about it.
“This is just us being together,” Anders said, “as friends. Just like we’ve been doing.”
“I wasn’t aware that we were friends before,” Fenris teased gently.
“I considered you a friend,” Anders said, “but that’s beside the point. What I wanted to say was: will you go on a date with me tomorrow night? I want to take you out and treat you like you deserve to be treated.”
Fenris blinked, his mouth opening slightly. In the fading light, the blush was only barely visible.
“I was going to keep the destination a surprise,” Anders continued, “but if you aren’t comfortable with that, I’ll tell you.”
“No need,” Fenris said, tugging on Anders’ arm to pull him closer. He stepped closer to Anders, rising up a little on his toes until their noses were almost touching. “I accept your offer,” he said softly. “I will go on a date with you.”
Anders blinked, mesmerized by the light in the green eyes only inches from his face.
“Fenris…”
“I trust you.”
Fenris rose up on his toes the rest of the way, kissing Anders again, using their linked hands to steady himself. Their kiss was still short, but left both of them feeling tingly and warm. Anders was proud and so happy that Fenris had not only listened to him after so often complaining about soulmates, but had even agreed to try being with Anders. Fenris was still afraid, but he’d known Anders for some time, and Anders had never done anything to make Fenris mistrust him. Sure, he was ridiculous, had too many cats in his apartment, and would knock on Fenris’ door every other night to use something, but he was kind and respectful. Fenris would trust him. He wanted to see what this was like. Perhaps even people like him, who thought that they would never be accepted in a world of sexual desire, could find love too. Maybe he wasn’t so broken after all.
