#acyllus

[acyllus]

as a child I thought: no, this isn't sorrow.

sorrow must be deeper. its described so much worse than what I am feeling. these people suffer, but I haven't reached that state. surely they have it worse than me. because its pulling them apart while I'm still together. i am just a poser, a fake. my pain doesn't matter that much. it hurts, but it is bearable.

now I have grown up to know: this was sorrow; i suffered terribly.

[acyllus]

But, well, I am a poet.

History says we're not supposed to be happy.

[acyllus]

I need to hold on to silly dreams, and the soul that I imagine to be next to me whenever I need it, because the only other option would be to give up and I'm still too stubborn for that. My hopes will always be burning higher than my fears. It hurts, but at least I can feel it.

[acyllus]

I love winter and autumn because its silent, because it slows the people down. I will never not admire a thing that takes the pace from us, that keeps us back.

[acyllus]

"You got a lot of corpses laying around", the stranger said.

I looked around. I was alone. He was right.

"You should burn them", he recommended.

"No", I responded. "I still love them."

[acyllus]

I never understood why people won't realize what they do when they leave without another thought.

That they are attached to others.

That they are tearing parts out of them.

[acyllus]

I loved him so much and he rejected me so often - silently, but hurtful - that I forgot that I even could be loved

~ you never could have comprehend the type of wars I need to fight

[acyllus]