Pirate!Au - letters from the sea
During his three (going on four) years at sea, Hans has written a lot of letters. They were mostly addressed to one person. They were never sent.
Dear Brother,
It's been six years since we talked. Three since I've seen you for the last time.
If I could, I would love to tell you about everything I've seen, heard and done during those years. I wish I could tell you all about my new life. Treasures I've discovered. Long lost cities everyone deemed to be just a legend (you would love it, a lot of ruins to be studied). All the magic and wonders found both on sea and on land.
I'd like to introduce you to my new friends to my new family. I know they would love you.
I would just like you to know that I am alive and well. To be honest, I've never been this happy in my entire life.
But then again, I imagine you wouldn't like to hear about it. I know I've ruined everything and you don't want to have anything to do with me. That's fair. I have to respect that. But sometimes, when I can't sleep, I close my eyes and try to remember your voice as you were telling me something about history. I regret I wasn't paying enough attention. I guess I just took it for granted.
I am trying to convince myself I don't miss you, but I know I'm just lying to myself. I do miss you, I miss you so much, every day. It's ridiculous, because we weren't even that close and I know you were nice to me not because you particularly adored me, but because that's just who you are as a person. But you were my only safe space. And even if I understand why you didn't come to see me after what had happened in Arendelle, it hurts. I don't blame you, I am taking full responsibility for it - but it just still hurts.
I would do anything to set this straight and to make it right again. And even though I am an outlaw now and I intend to stay that way, I swear I try the hardest I can to be a better man than I proved myself to be.
I just wish I could ever make it up to you. I wish I could say how sorry I am for all the shame I caused.
For all its worth, I hope you will be able to forget all about me, at some point. You have enough siblings, after all, it should be easy enough to let go of one.
But I will never forget you. My only big brother among all of my older brothers.
It is a middle of the night when I write those words. You would probably scold me for staying up so late. And then you would stay up even longer, with your books.
But I am younger and you are right. It is way past my bedtime. I will go to sleep now, I have a lot to do tomorrow. Let me just burn this letter first.
Goodnight, Lars.