A new collage series have been working on for some time, on a subject that is both personal and reflective of many the harsh, relentless realities of domestic abuse. A reality that I discovered so many of us share yet keep secret for various reasons…mostly different levels of fear, or not even realizing the confusing world you’re living in. ’You made me do this because of your poison,’ became my norm and I didn’t even think it was abnormal.
A kind person told me once that I should not write it down, because it’s something that you want to forget. Another said I had to fight to stop what cycle I could. I chose to record through collage. Today I see it as exposing and understanding the truths that I was made to believe were my own, or slowly accept because I thought things would change…not knowing that the actions forced on me, or that I convinced myself of, were not a reality at all. Realizing that I was living with someone else’s absolute lies, fears and sadness taken out on me first emotionally then physically is a hard truth to face. Most importantly, understanding that many others shared experiences that were creepily similar and often harder then my own. This was difficult to learn but comforting to know.
In the end these were not my truths at all, but the awful sad realities of someone I loved and harmed me, who now is just something that is part of the story of me, good and bad.
As I’ve learned, there is no prescribed time or way that will make healing go faster, and each of us has to find our voice the best way we can. Speaking out does makes room for peace.
I hope this series says something to you, or most importantly, helps show that violence can sneak up on anyone, any age, any gender at anytime. And it is not ok. Be safe and know your rights.
http://truthsbetelling.tumblr.com
http://aelanacurran.com/collage
