So much for chivalry
I was going to draw a comic for this but it’s taking too long to get past the super sketchy stage! so.. Soon(TM). It’s not edited or proofread but it was fun to write.
The lumbering Norn crashed his way down the 10 storey tower, wailing as he fell. By the undoubtedly unhelpful railing at the top, stood a tall, fiery-haired woman with her hand over her mouth, a shocked look on her face.
How did we get here?
It was a rowdy night at the Crow’s Nest, Lion’s Arch recently renovated bar. Perched high atop a spiraling staircase, it was the perfect place for patrons to climb up to the watering hole and be too drunk to crawl back down. Sølvi, at the insistence of her wonderful but pushy friends, had planted herself at one of the more reasonably sized bar tables for her large frame. She was thankful that the multicultural city allowed for multi-sized furniture, but was also more grateful for the appropriately Norn-sized pints the Nest provided. Here she was meant to meet someone who, Sølvi’s friends hoped, would not only not be intimidated by the Commander but also melt the ice around her heart. Or at least give her butterflies. Anything, really.
The evening began smoothly. Live music set the tone, and not one to shy away from chanting sea shanties, Sølvi sang along. After a thorough warmup of her vocal cords (and several ales to help), she’d relaxed and let her hair down a little. Hopefully, with her tangle of red curls released, and her armour traded for a more casual attire, she wouldn’t be so easily recognised as the Slayer of Dragons (the title of Slayer of Issormir now long forgotten for her more ambitious exploits). Soon enough, the lone woman was accosted. So this is tonight’s handsome prince, she thought. Not too much of an eyesore. He approached her, drink in hand and a charismatic smile on is face. With one swift look up and down, she assessed him: tall (but still a head shorter than her), muscular but soft around the middle, hair partly tied in braids framing his rugged face. The tattoos snaking around his tanned forearms hinted at a nautical life; she could appreciate a sailor’s looks, but wasn’t too keen to put up with a sailor’s idea of flirting - particularly if he’d already downed a few.
“Why hello, lass. Are you the one Morgana has been telling me about? She wasn’t lying when she said I’d be able to spot you in a crowd,” he said with a gruff voice. “Mind if I join you at this minuscule table?” Sølvi managed a smile — her friends, including the aforementioned Morgana, had told her this would ‘help’ — and motioned for him to join. It wasn’t uncommon for her hair to be the first point of conversation, but she hoped that it wouldn’t be the only one. “Morgana pointed you the right way. What’s your poison?” Sølvi extended her hand and the two grasped forearms. She made a mental note of his dirty fingernails. The man introduced himself as Leopold. He was drinking ale imported from Snowden Drifts’ large (and only) brewery. Not too bad.
So they conversed, he was kind enough to buy her more drinks and she was fortunate enough that he was so impressed with himself that she did not have to say much about her own accomplishments. ‘The men in LA don’t like to be outdone,’ her friends had told her. There likely wasn’t a man in Tyria Sølvi hadn’t outdone, and she wondered why it was encouraged to spend time with people who were so insecure in themselves they couldn’t handle getting their egos bruised, but she kept the advice in mind and she kept her words to herself.
Leo seemed to be quite pleased with himself. As the alcohol replaced his blood he grew more jovial, and more bold. So far they’d covered the weather, LA’s transformation, his work, his thoughts on music, and his apparently valuable opinion on beer. Sølvi, on the other end, had slowly but surely tuned out of the conversation. That is, until she was jolted out of her reverie by the surprise of a foot rubbing against her own. More bold indeed. “So, what do you think of all this Elder Dragon business?” Ah. The dreaded question. She opened her mouth and began to speak but was quickly cutoff by Leo’s abundant expertise. Sølvi retracted her foot. Leo, undeterred, framed the side of her that was open to the rest of the bar with his leg. “I think it’s all a bit of nonsense. Blown up to be a big deal, you know? Zhaitan, Mordresomething and Kraalky. People call them elder dragons, but we - us Norn - know the truth. The only dragon that’s out there that’s big enough to pick a fight is Jormag, and even then, that one’s not all bad.” At this, Sølvi raised a brow. With three dragons killed by her hand, she was curious to know how exactly another one could be ‘not that bad’. “In what way?”Leopold leaned forward in his seat, beer breath becoming uncomfortably close for the woman. “Jormag is quite generous to us fishers. Whenever we go north to the Sound, there’s always plenty to catch.”“You think that’s because of Jormag, not because it’s a mostly untouched area where the Koda work to maintain balance?”He shook his head. “My Captain has spoken to the dragon, struck a deal with them. We are granted safe passage and overflowing nets, and in exchange, all we need to do is carry an effigy of Jormag aboard ship and speak of their good favour.”The alarm bells rang in Sølvi’s mind. This man could be a Son of Svanir, or at least following the orders of one. She downed her pint in preparation to leave — but she did want to ask one more question. “Do you think that the Pact Commander will defeat Jormag?”At this, he guffawed, rocking on his bar stool. Sølvi’s face turned sour. “Of course not, you funny lass. Braham’s the one who chipped the tooth, a task only a good Norn man could possibly achieve. The whole pact commander thing is pish, if you ask me, all a marketing or a diplomacy ploy. They need someone to be a face, so they’ve put that woman up there. Bad news sounds better when it comes from pretty lips.” He leaned forward again, and this time, snaked a hand up her thigh. “Say, you’ve got quite pretty lips too — what do you say, shall I take you back to mine so you can sit on my —”Before he had a chance to finish his unsavoury sentence, Sølvi grabbed his grubby calloused hand and slammed it onto the table, twisting his arm in the process. Leo stammered, drunken mind too slow to comprehend where his charm failed him. With one swift motion Sølvi kicked his chair from underneath him and he fell, knocking his jaw against the wood. She brought his arm behind his back.“Don’t speak to me or Morgana again.” Without a second wasted, the hot-tempered woman picked him up as if he weighed a feather (though the powerful rippling muscles in her arms indicated otherwise), and unceremoniously threw him off the side of the Nest.
So we have come full circle: a man falling from a tower, and Sølvi at the top, hand over her mouth. Though it was not in shock, but due to the unpleasant realisation that this would undoubtedly be her third strike. Sure enough, a shrieking voice from behind her commanded her to “GET OUT!”. Sølvi finished Leopold’s drink, observing the bar’s stunned silence, and then saluted the band as she made her final exit. She departed to a round of cheers and hoots, and made the most of the commotion by grabbing a bottle of rum off the table of patrons nearby. She would be missed.









