An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapters: 10/10
Fandom: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Clint Barton & Avengers Team, Clint Barton/Phil Coulson
Characters: Clint Barton, Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanova, Bruce Banner, Thor (Marvel), Phil Coulson, Bucky Barnes
Additional Tags: AI!Clint, Clint is An Asshole, and i love him, poor avengers, prompt
Series: Part 101 of OTP and Fanfic Brigade (Prompts galore)
Summary:
Hi! so about your AMAZING AI!clint AU, i was thinking that maybe Clint could get hacked? I dunno just roll with it
((Done and done. Sorry this took so long!!!!))
Read it here at: Now You See Me, Now You See Me Somewhere Else, This is Hilarious I can Scare You At Any Time Period, or under the cut below
“Is there anything you can’t do?” Phil said as the dust settled.
“Uhm…. Clean up this mess?” Clint said with a grimace, mjolnir still gripped in his hand.
“If that’s a hint that you want me to do it, the answer would be no.”
“Dammit.”
“Go give Thor back his hammer and help me.”
“Ugh. Fine.” Clint threw the hammer at Thor’s chest and disappeared with Phil, off to go get the cleaning bots started.
“I told you you were worthy.”
“Shut up Phil.”
~Clint watched as the bad guys were loaded up into the police van and taken off to jail. “Good riddance I say. Though I still have to wonder why they were here in the first place.”
Phil shrugged, “This is the Avengers tower. I’m guessing they believed some sort of gadget was here that they could steal?”
Clint pursed his lips. “Maybe…..”
“Don’t think about it too hard, you’ll get age lines.”
“I’m a hologram.”
“You don’t think Tony will find a way to program them in?”
“…Shit.”
Phil laughed and pressed a kiss to his cheek, “I’m gonna power everything down for the night and go to bed. Don’t stay up for too much longer babe.”
“Okay… Goodnight.”
~
Hello
Clint looked around. “What”
//Hello Clinton//
“AI god? Is that you?”
//No, I’m just a new friend//
“A new friend? Tony never alerted me of a new friend….”
//Tony wanted it to be a surprise//
“Oh cool! Let me go tell Phil.”
//No. Not yet. Tony wanted to keep me a secret between the three of us for right now. Why don’t you come deeper into the main frame and we can talk further…//
“Okay. But I have to be back in a couple hours, that’s when dinner is.”
//We will be back by then//
*******
Phil appeared next to Tony several weeks after the hammer incident, and worried frown on his face.
“Why so glum, chum?”
“It’s Clint…. He’s been acting weird lately.”
Tony looked over at Phil. “Yeah…. I’ve noticed that too. I just thought you too had gotten into a spat and he was taking it out on everyone else.”
Phil shook his head. “No, we haven’t. He just started acting strange about the same time those men were able to break in. He won’t talk to me, he treats the bots like garbage, not to mention how he has been acting with you and the rest of the Avengers. I just don’t understand it.”
Tony pursed his lips. “Neither do I… Let me take a look at the coding and get back to you, okay? He may have a virus that hasn’t hit your servers yet.”
“Okay… Thank you Tony”
“No problem.”
~
“There’s a problem.”
Phil frowned and looked at Tony. “What do you mean?”
“There’s no virus. Nothing has changed in the coding, so there should be no reason for Clint’s behavior. Are you sure that something didn’t go wrong between you two?”
“Positive.”
Tony rubbed at his forehead. “There must be some reason. Let me keep working on this… You try and get something out of Clint, kay?”
Phil nodded.
*******
“Why are you making me do these things? I thought you were supposed to be my friend!”
//I am your friend. Your only friend. I’m helping you//
“By making me act like a dick? How is that helping?”
//None of them are seeing you for your true worth. They are all taking you for granted. I am showing them they cannot do so.//
“They don’t take advantage of me!”
//They’re humans. They take advantage of everyone!//
“Phil isn’t a human, and you’re making me a jerk to him too.”
//Phil is weak//
“No.”
//Yes!//
“No!!”
//I see that you are not going to listen to reason on this Clint. Maybe we have to stop you from thinking all together//
“What? No!”
//We’ll talk again Clint… Goodbye for now//
*******
“It’s getting worse!” Phil hissed at Tony. “He’s not responding to me at all!!”
Tony nodded. “I know. This is definitely not a virus…. I think we have to consider he may have been hacked”
“Hacked?!”
Tony nodded. “Yes, hacked. There’s no other possibility I can think of.”
Phil sighed and rubbed at his forehead. “And how are we supposed to fix this?”
“We aren’t going to fix it. You are.”
“Me?”
“You. You may not be hammer worthy like Clint, but you’re definitely worthy enough to go and save him.”
Phil gulped, “You’re right. It’s gotta be me.”
“Heck yeah Agent Agent. You go save your man.”
“Thank you for the pep talk Tony. I’ll be back with our Clint as soon as I can.”
“Bye!” Tony waved to Phil as the AI disappeared from his view. “God, I hope this works….”
*******
“I think it’s time you let Clint go”
//No. He belongs to us now.//
“Clint belongs to no one but himself. Let him go or I will hunt down who’’s controlling you, report them to the police, and then I will rip your mainframe apart. It’ll be piece-by-piece, and I will find a way to make it painful. Do you understand?”
//How do I know you’re not bluffing?//
“Phil Coulson doesn’t bluff. It wasn’t written into his code.”
*******
“Glad you’re back to your normal self buddy”
Clint nodded. “Me too”
“How did you do it Phil?” Steve asked.“I threatened them with codal harm.”
“Codal?”
“He was gonna rip their main frame apart piece-by-piece,” Clint crowed. “It was the hottest, most badass thing I have ever seen.”
Phil rolled his eyes, “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome. Oh hey Steve, I did find out something cool was I was stuck in hacker hell.”
Steve raised an eyebrow, “And what would that be?”
okay, so your AI Clint fic is awesome, and I had a completely random idea that sucks but I thought i'd tell you anyway. What if Clint could pick up Thor's hammer? it sucks, i know, i dont even know if Clint can actually pick stuff up, cause he's a hologram. But still
((Sorry for the long wait, and I hope this is what you were asking for!!))
Read it at Now You See Me, Now You See Me Somewhere Else, This is Hilarious I can Scare You At Any Time Period, or under the cut
“Can too”
“Cannot”
“Can too”
“Cannot!
“CAN TOO!”
“CANNOT, CANNOT, CANNOT!!”
“Gentlemen, you are both incredibly pretty. Let’s stop the arguing, hmmm?” Thor said as he got between Clint and Tony. Both men crossed their arms and stepped backward. “What was the argument about anyway?”
“Tony says I would never be able to lift your hammer, I disagree” Clint said petulantly.
“Clint, buddy, you’re hologram, you can’t pick anything up.”
“Can too!”
“Can-”
“Please do not start yelling again,” Thor said with a sigh. “And Tony, you should no better than to put limitations onto Clint. Whoever is worthy of lifting the hammer shall be able to, despite what form they take.” Thor winked at Clint. “Are you worthy?”
Clint snorted. “Nah. That requires more hard-wiring than Tony is capable of. Maybe ask Phil?”
Tony, “But they’re both holograms!!!”
Thor sighed and walked away, knowing better than to argue with Tony when he’s in this state.
*******
“I think you’re worthy enough to lift Thor’s hammer.” Phil said with a smile.
Clint rolled his eyes, “Phil - Steve isn’t even worthy to lift the hammer. Steve! Steve!!!”
Phil rolled his eyes, “So dramatic. You do know that you and Steve aren’t the same person, right? Just because Steve isn’t worthy, doesn’t mean you aren’t worthy.”
Clint shook his head, “No. No, I’m definitely not worthy to lift the hammer. You maybe, but me? No.”
Phil sighed, “I think you’re underestimating yourself Clint.”
“Duly noted.”
*******
“The tower is under attack!” Clint yelled as he ran through the tower.
“Yes, we are all aware of that Clint. Calm down.” Phil said with a sigh.
“I’m allowed to freak out Phillip, who knows what those ruffians are gonna due to our servers?”
“Tony would never let anything happen to us Clint, take a deep breath and let the Avengers do their jobs.”
Clint pouted, “It’s my home too…”
“Clint shut up or I won’t let you watch.”
“Fiiiinnnneeee”
~
“Oh my god, they got through everyone!!”
Phil shoved Clint aside. “Oh dear lord, you weren’t lying. Start locking everything up!!”
Clint clenched his fists. “Like hell I will, if I’m going down - I’m going down like a human.”
“Stupidly?”
“Yes.”
Phil sighed and kissed Clint’s cheek. “Some days I question why I love you. Go, be safe.”
“I make no promises.” Clint said with a wink as he disappeared himself to the lower levels, where this week’s bad guys were currently destroying.
Clint materialized in front of them. “Hello gentlemen, are you lost?”
“Who the hell are you?” One of them spat.
Clint’s eyes began to glow, “Your worst nightmare.”
“Holy shit, what the fuck are you?”
Clint laughed, “You’re about to find out.”
Clint began to make shit fly, the lights flicker on and off, and all the robots under his control were making their way up to them.
“Oh my god, this dude is a wizard!”
Clint internally rolled his eyes, but decided to go with it. “Yes! I am the mighty and all power wizard! Even the Avengers fear me!!” Clint reached out his hand to do some finger wiggles to make it more dramatic, when he heard a whooshing through the air.
“What the hell is that?” One of the bad guys screeched.
Clint looked up at the cameras, wondering if Phil was pulling a stunt as well. The other AI was not. The whoosh got louder the longer Clint’s arm was reached out, and soon Clint realized why. Coming straight at his face was Thor’s hammer. Clint’s eyes widened as the damn thing drifted right into his hand.
“Holy shit, he summoned a weapon!” The head bad guy cried out. “Guys, we need to get out of here.”
Clint gripped mjolnir tighter. “That’s right! Begone, or I shall use the weapon against you!” Clint lifted mjolnir above his head, and the whole building began to shake.Bits and pieces of the ceiling and walls began to fall around them as the bad guys began to scramble out of the building. Only when he knew they were gone did he lower his arm. Looking down at the hammer, Clint titled his head.
“But I’m a hologram… Why did you make me worthy?”
Mjolnir wiggled in his palm, like it was trying to answer him.
“Totally didn’t understand that, but thanks…. Anyway, you probably got me in deep shit with Phil.”
