#ailin talks.

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i’m still shocked that he loves the parts of my body that i hate the most

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my boob hurts like fuck

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i’m literally so heartbroken

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/ is it seasonal depression? is it pms? /

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sometimes i get in this apathy state of mind that i just ---- ??? like it’s not that i don’t find people in my life interesting or that i suddenly don’t want to talk to them so i voluntarily and consciously retract into myself, it’s just that it happens. it’s not that i get bored, i just don’t find the energy in myself for connecting as i usually do, i fall quiet and don’t even observe people, i just stay put inside my head trying to not fall into the swirling vortex of anxiety that lies in the middle of the black apathy hole

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as every year, all y’all in eurovision land while i just watch the memes and rtry to figure it out

to no avail

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does falling for someone feel like fire alarms sometimes and others like whimsical spring night fireflies at others or is that just me

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the street is so fucked up i want to go out with a knife or a fUCKING GUN IDK A CHAINSAW WOULD BE GOOD TOo