simonverse characters as things my friends and I have said
Leah: Permission to ship everyone with theraphy?
Bram: If Dan and Phil or Thomas Sanders ever post on their Instagram that there are random voices whispering to them, that’s me.
Abby: LEAH DO YOU WANT TO SMEELL THE CSNDLE ON STAURDAY
Bram: Abby is the CEO of exclamation points.
Simon: Good. Now go put on that emo playlist and fucking WALLOW
Garrett: VODKA.
Ms. Albright: I love you you beautiful bitch
Simon before Bram: I’m going to marry Cal Price one day (istg this is an actual quote)
Taylor, drinking a milkshake and answering why she can't hang out: *slurps* coronavirus *slurps*
Nick: Wait. Is Bram my father???
Taylor: I’m in love with Renee Rapp!
Martin: You’re dying from chlamydia.
Cal: Your hair looks like, if I ate it, it would taste like Tutti Frutti.
Cassie, texting Molly when Abby calls her to tell her she kissed Leah: “Oh its fine shes a lesbian”
Simon, talking about Cal: He's so cute and french though i don't regret liking him at all
Anna: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJfADwFc/ Can i just say that if these gay anime children ever had a nerf gun war rhis is 100% how it would play out and I love it
Ms. Albright: welcome to my world sweetie! also SHUT HIM THE FUCK UP,THIS IS A GODDAMN SCHOOLYARD FIGHT
Nora talking about Nick: i think my guitar teacher forgot about me
Simon talking about Elton John: our gay drug recoverist song baby
Reid trying to be cool: HIGH KANGAROOS VODKA DRUNK KANGAROOS
Alice: But you’ll have to witness him make love to a pasta maker and do you want that???
Abby: *in horrible british accent* Daniel Radcliffe has nothing on me.
Garrett: “also i sing and listen to a lot of songs about sex for someone genuinely scared of it lmfao”
Will: So we’re ignoring that I just said I gave Molly chlamydia...
Leah: Stop wearing makeup on the beach Abby!
Leah: Helen is a stupid name for a weapon.
Leah: what im i doing now you may ask? Reading my hero acidemia Do i have the manga? no Do i like most long time anime fans know where to look for good pirated manga? hell yea So im a illegally reading my hero acidemia? yes yes i am.
Garrett: Who is Tyrian? Leah: A bottom.
Nick: but you know hopefully i don’t get robbed Leah: nicks gonna die/span>
Nora: GUSSE WHO JUST CHUGGED AN ENTIRE CUP OF BLACK COFFE?! ME B/C IM AN SMART DUMBASS AND WAITED UNTIL THE WEEKEND TO CHUGE COFFEE THIS LATE Cal: ELEANOR JANE SPIER Nora: y e s? Cal: HOW DARE Cal: SLEEP IS IMPORTANT Nora: ADHD says otherwise Nora: and i dont noramly have coffee this late but tonights a late coffee night Cal: okay sweetie < 3 Cal: dont od on coffee Cal: be a careful chile Nora: ok i will < 3
Olivia: I have 30 children and only one of them is from my real life. Cassie: Sound like Molly’s crushes.
Bram: *Typed with videos* Guys we are literally a little under an hour away from DC there most likely will be riots all over the U.S but they'll be very intense in DC and in the states neighboring it aka Maryland and Virginia. Simon: well we're all gonna die Bram: Y E P Bram: HOW FAST CAN WE BUY NATURAL DISASTER RATIONS?
Bieber: *walks across Nora’s keyboard and puts his butt in her face* Nora: Bieber your tiny dog butt does not spark joy!
Nick, drunk: Okay but let’s be honest I'd be a great God Leah, sober but humouring Nick: I'd be a great Lucifer
Simon: Garrett are you good? Garrett: I’m just eating my burger
Bram: But what if I’m dangerous? I’m chlamydia Simon: Well, you can still stay, because… Simon: Simon: Simon: I like chlamydia Leah, a few seconds later: I’m personally a gonorrhea person.