#allinity

[princevin]

l wish we had an easier way of talking about that really awful experience of when people perceive you as the wrong allinity. Like how it just feels more than a simple misunderstanding, like almost… violating. And it just makes me feel sort of trapped. Like to me it’s almost like getting misgendered but with my allinity instead of gender…

Thank you for this ask! It's taken me a long time to answer this because I really had to sit on this because you vocalized something I really hadn't/haven't at this point.

Personally, I like it more when people use masculine terms for me over feminine ones despite being both a man and a woman and I could never figure out why. I think what you've said has gotten to the core of it. When the people around me use "lady" or "woman" in reference to me, I can almost feel the very feminine connotation they're attaching to the word. (I'm not saying those words are inherently feminine, just that sometimes you can feel that the person using it is is attaching a very gendered understanding to the word.) But, the same people using/accidentally using "man" or "guy" for me, feels not great but better. Because those fall more closely in line with my allinity than the previous terms. Thank you supers for this ask!!

[genderwanderer]

I thought masc4masc is when guy who has a deep voice or works out or something still wants to be cute or feminine in someway deep down i really didn't know people out here really liked liked citizens who are just regular men like sister the end result in just them trying to force you to be "normal" woman and you clashing against each other cause 2 of the same energies will end up just conflicting

Making a masc guy my pretty househusband sounds so hot though

Lmaoo I thought masc4masc (atleast, in terms of hetgnc speak) was that too. I still don't really know what qualifies as it since I'm really new to the community but anibelle described it as yaoi but one of them isn't a dude which seems accurate.

I do have experience with masc guys trying to forcefem me or feeling awkward when I want to "act like a chivalrous boyfriend", but I don't think couples need to have a masc/fem or desirer/desired dichotomy to be successful. In my opinion, thinking like that just reinforces oppressive gender binaries - there are so many ways two people can be "masc" without having the same energy. Masculinity is defined by what the person internally considers masculine, it's not the same for everyone. Same goes for any other allinity.

The idea of a masc guy secretly yearning to be feminine or wanting roles to be reversed IS so attractive though. It's not a forcefem or degradation thing for me, it's more because I think dichotomies are hot. There's a concept called "tomboy femme" I heard on tumblr, and my god that's so hot too. I don't know, anyone who describes their allinity in a completely non-conventional way is automatically cool.

[thewalkersinterlude]

Maybe im wrong , but i think the gender allinity concept can expand to other types of gender qualities?

Intramavs or intriques (based on maveriques) could have a self defined and independent allinity from the current fem/masc/angyn/neu , while having a gendered feeling still

Or intraxen ( the xenine quality is a xenogender equivialent to being masc/fem) that has a more vague , conceptual, or off binary and/or non human type of gender allinity

Alternively intraelius Could also be interchangable with or a binary , gnchet friendly allinity based of meliusgender - term for binary folk who find concepts/animals/things better to decribe their gender much like folk who are xenogender

intranull can instead refer to gender nullinity instead of being neutral - its a subtle difference , but having a allinity that seems to be non existant or empty seems like a experience that can exist seperately from the equalled out feeling..

introis perhaps instead could be a contender? Based the general quality neutrois that neutral generally falls in..

[thewalkersinterlude]

A Intrangyn experience : (least mine, I wouldnt consider myself the end all be all)

- I tend to feel a bit like a watered down intramasc - i was a gal who liked masc clothes and connected to more softer guy things (games , tv aimed for younger boys, etc) and didnt quite fit with most girly things and cisnorm galhood

A core memory is feeling p wierd and sad even , that someone didnt see me as a tomboy for some reason- in hindsight, my aspirations was in masculine galhood - non feminine , off binary (xenine/androgynous/masc) womanhood is the main reason I am a gal still , even partially and in flux - HRT makes me more comfy with myself

(A feeling of my womanhood being cis or trans really depends, and kinda feels like a cusp of cisnoncomforming and nonbinary trans , or just both - but thats a whole other convo, I tend to not dwell on it since its complicated )

-it tends to feel like some of the intrafem stuff stayed with me - my personality and how I do things tend to feel masc with a feminine softness - I still have sterotypical hobbies that are coded fem , but can be neutral (doll collecting, drawing, etc)

- My gender tends to play a role and sinks into my allinity- Out of the hodgepodge of things my ID is (I like labels and tend to pick up ones that fit me- but i does make sense if ya think about it) im very much hyperandrogynous , and it tends to go as far as how i internally allign myself also - as androgynhood is more important to me .

[thewalkersinterlude]

Actually thinking more about intramav and intrique, how do you like the idea of intrique being a separate autonomous allinity by itself and intramavs being an maverine allinity on its own. So they’ll be similar because they are both autonomous but the maverine allinity specifically excludes the common four qualities (masc/fem/angyn/neu, etc). I see my intra-allinity as outherine but I also see it as iquinous/iquine (link). Making it intra-outher/intraoutherine and intrique or intra-iquine/intriquine.

never actually heard of that one before - that sounds like a good idea!!

id say it would be good addition

[thewalkersinterlude]

Regarding the names you suggested for other intra-allinities (which is cool btw love the names!), I think it definitely has the potential to expand to other gender qualities beyond masc, fem, and even androgyny! I’ve been thinking of myself as having a outherine allinity because that’s what works for me the best so I’m sure that these suggestions will give people who see this in the future a good idea of how things can be for themselves beyond masc, fem and androgyny!

im glad! i tend to be intrangyn myself, but Id just think experences that are neither of the 4 make a lotta sense , as not everyone fits the masc/neu/fem/angyn when it comes to gender ids - i especially see value in a more desciptive , non human or self defined allinity

thoughts on them below :

for otherinity i was thinking it would especially work - as it tends to fit the "other" description that the allinity guide has .. introuthe would be my suggestion?

i used mav in particular as i really think a independent and self defined core that isnt the 4 currently existing makes sense

ditto for null - i can see someone just having a void or a empty core too- neutrality tends to also gets mixed up with androgyny - but both have a subtle difference to each other and i find thats what makes em special the same way nullinity and neutrality does

for xenos in particular - i guess the first thing i think of is like .. alterhumans (particularly therians) , that tend to relate with non humanity and have a non human spirit - so by extension their core could just be animalistic in nature , instead of the humanlike masc/fem/neu/angyn ?

but i think anyone could have a core that can be described the same way that folk use xenos to descibe their gender - if i use the oceangender in the meilus definitions as a example , the intraxen gal would feel like even with their gender being a gal , their inner experience and core could be that of a ocean - rough , crashing , and prone to swings and highs/lows - xeninty is a quality to be made the same as masc/fem , so why not use it apart from a gender ??