Plaything: Epilogue- Part 2
“Is this how you felt when I was born?” Vincent marvels at little Ciel as he cradles the child, now three months old.
It should be a simple question. For any other father, I suppose it probably would be.
But not for me.
“Yes… and no.” I say quietly.
“What do you mean?”
“It was an unparalleled joy. But it also… hurt.”
“It… hurt?” Vincent’s brows pinch. Of course, he wouldn’t understand. And I hope he will never have to.
“Yes. It hurt because I couldn’t be there for you as I wanted to be. I could only visit your cradle in the dead of the night. We… she and I were at odds, at the time.” I admit.
Vincent looks like he regrets asking. For a moment, he is quiet. But then his eyes spark with recollection.
“When I was little, I used to awaken to a shadow in the corner of my room. I wasn’t afraid, though, and called you the grey man. She-” He pauses, licks his lips. Debates whether or not to mention his mother by name. “She thought I was dreaming when I told her a spectre would come play with me at night.”
“I… I wanted to hold you,” My voice cracks against my will.
Perhaps if I could have done that, it would have cemented my bond with him, and I wouldn’t have taken our relationship and twisted it into this… thing which grew and mutated like a virus.
“To tell you that you were my son and how much I loved you, but I couldn’t. I had to settle for letting you play with these.” I clutch my prayer beads. “Do you remember that?”
Vincent nods slowly.
The dam around my heart breaks and I suck in a harsh breath. At long last, it all spills forth.
“But more than anything, it hurt because I knew that all the love in the world could not stop my fragile son from aging, and that one day, I would have to watch you die.” My throat clenches painfully, and a single tear spills from my eye. “It was then that I knew I must do everything in my power to prevent that. I won’t lose you as I’ve lost everyone else, Vincent.”
“I…” Vincent draws a sharp breath, and holds Ciel closer. “I understand.”
“No. Pray that you never do. For if you did, you’d have scars like mine, love.” I say. “You’d have scars like mine. I suppose it is time I tell you how I got them.”
*********************
You can read chapter 1-21 here. Just be mindful of the tags on this dead dove story. https://archiveofourown.org/works/39778392/chapters/99590991














