On the Cause of the End of an Era, or Rather the Beginning of a New Era
Ryan needed someone there for him. He needed someone there to hold and cradle. He needed someone who could hold him and tell him the world was not nearly as scary as what he saw. He needed someone to love him as unconditionally as he knew and could place their hand gently on his face and whisper sweet nothings as he falls safely asleep.
I was that guy for 4 weeks. I was everything he needed for 4 short weeks. For 15 other weeks, I was the whisper of sweet nothings without any contact.
You were without that touch that you needed more than anything else. You needed something to ground you back to this world. I couldn't do that for you.
I needed two things. In order, I needed you, only you, and I needed that touch of someone I loved to ground me to this world.
I would have done anything to stay with you because I knew you were the one and only of my life. I knew you were the one I needed forever and always. You would forever be my Rhino. I was willing and able to sacrifice my second need for my first because I loved you so much. I was in a different place. I knew the world was better because I had you, fights and all. But you still needed that reassurance.
My greatest failure was that I was not more proactive in loving you. I took your love for granted and failed to act in some situations which I think le to our demise.
Ryan, I will forever and always love you more than anything could ever put into words. You are the Tui to my La. You are the Push to my Pull. You are Glasses to my Scar.
