"You know what would be funny?" Alysa announced suddenly from the hotel couch during a Stars on Ice off-day.
That sentence alone immediately made Amber Glenn nervous.
"No."
Alysa ignored her completely.
"I'm gonna make a quiz."
You looked up from your phone.
"...About what?"
A slow grin spread across Alysa's face.
"Me."
Silence.
Then Isabeau Levito burst out laughing instantly.
"Oh this is going to become toxic so fast."
"Exactly," Alysa said proudly.
And somehow thirty minutes later, the four of you were sitting around the hotel suite living room while Alysa dramatically guarded a notebook against her chest like classified government information.
You sat cross-legged on the carpet beside the couch while Amber and Isabeau argued over whether friendship years should count as an advantage.
"They absolutely should," Amber insisted.
"You literally helped raise her," you argued.
"That's what I'm SAYING."
Alysa looked delighted by the chaos already unfolding.
"For the record," she announced, "there WILL be prizes."
Isabeau narrowed her eyes suspiciously.
"What kind of prizes?"
Alysa grinned.
"Winner gets free coffee tomorrow morning."
Amber gasped dramatically.
"Oh this just became serious."
"You're acting like none of us can afford coffee," you laughed.
"That's not the POINT."
Alysa finally stood up importantly holding her notebook.
"Welcome everybody," she announced dramatically, "to the first annual Who Knows Alysa Best competition."
Amber immediately applauded sarcastically.
"Thank you, thank you," Alysa bowed.
Then she pointed accusingly at all three of you.
"No cheating. No helping each other. And absolutely no emotional manipulation."
You blinked.
"...Why did you look directly at Amber while saying that?"
"Because she's the weakest link."
"I'M THE ONLY ONE HERE WHO'S KNOWN YOU LONGER THAN SIX MONTHS."
"That's exactly why you're dangerous."
Isabeau was already laughing so hard she nearly fell off the couch.
Alysa cleared her throat dramatically before reading the first question.
"What is my favorite snack from gas stations during road trips?"
synopsis: you've been alysa's celebrity crush since your debut, and you two "happen" to cross paths at the AMAs ( part one )
pairing: olympian!older!alysa x katseye’s 7th member!reader
w.c: 3.1k
contains: tooth rotting flufffff | use of y/n (SORRYYUUUHH)
kk here: chromed out alysa can ruin my life and id thank her part one | part two not proofread
Alysa anxiously checked her makeup for the millionth time with her phone’s front camera in the Uber. She was on her way to the American Music Awards, twitching to bite her nails, leg shaking in nervousness. She knew you would be there with Prada.
Since KATSEYE was announced in 2023, Alysa had been embarrassingly obsessed with you. Even her Olympics leotard was inspired by your outfit in the Debut MV.
Unfortunately, she had never had the opportunity to see you up close, so this might be the first and only time she’d ever be able to come in close contact with you.
When KATSEYE debuted in 2024, you were only 15 and Alysa was 18. She hadn’t planned on stanning you because you were a minor, but she found herself slowly falling for your charms. She didn’t like you in a parasocial way. She just had your picture as her phone wallpaper and watched your fancams in her free time.
She had been to the Beautiful Chaos tour in December 2025 in Los Angeles. However, she could only get tickets for the second floor, so she could barely see you. She cried at the concert anyway.
Finally, her Uber stopped. Then, the flash of cameras nearly blinded her. She flinched, and then regained her composure, smiling for the cameras.
Eventually, she steps into the room and immediately gets pulled away to take pictures. Afterwards, she was pulled away again backstage to prepare herself for the prize presentation.
A strict-looking woman with a slick back walked over to her. “Alysa Liu?”
“Uh, yeah, yeah. That’s me.” Alysa spun around to talk to her.
“You will be presenting the prize for…” She ran a finger down her clipboard. “…New Artist of the Year. You can only see the winner when it’s time to present the award. The nominees are Olivia Dean, The Marías, Addison Rae, sombr, Lean Thomas, Alex Warren, Lola Young… and Katseye.”
Alysa’s heart skipped a beat when she heard your group, nodding. “Okay. Got it.” She took the envelope from the woman, carefully putting it into her pocket.
As she waited, she struck up a conversation with Anthony Ramos. Awkward, but better than just silence. After what felt like an eternity, it was finally Alysa’s time to announce the winner of New Artist of the Year.
She walked on stage with her practised confident smile, taking the stage and putting down the award on the lectern.
“And the winner for the Best Female K-Pop Artist is…” Alysa opened the envelope, pulling out the piece of paper. “KATSEYE!”
The camera switched to your group’s face. You stood up first as the leader, leading the rest to the stage to collect the award.
You then presented the winning speech.
“This is so insane, there’s so much I wanna say but there’s not enough time so I’ll keep this short. Thank you to our Eyekons, we could not be here without you guys. Thank you to everyone who’s ever supported us before, even if you’ve only streamed our song once or twice. Especially thank you LE SSERAFIM and ILLIT sunbaenim for inspiring us, we love you so much. We haven’t debuted for too long but we already have an American Music Award, and that’s just so so so unreal. We hope our music keeps inspiring everyone and we’ll keep representing our culture. Once again, thank you eyekons, and we are KATSEYE!”
Alysa couldn’t keep her gaze off of you. To the naked eye, she was just being polite. In reality, she was taking you in, admiring how good you looked even under the harsh stage lights.
You then smiled and bowed to Alysa, hugging her with one arm, and her heart nearly stopped beating.
You got off stage, and Alysa retreated backstage as well.
The rest of the ceremony flew by but Alysa was in a state of shock for the whole time. The fact that you, her bias, had smiled at her and hugged her was so unbelievable that she just couldn’t process it. She had expected a glance, maybe even a nod, but definitely not direct interaction.
Later, it was time for everyone to walk around and congratulate each other. Alysa was just wandering pointlessly, looking around and exploring the venue. When all of a sudden, a hand tapped her back and she heard a very familiar voice. “Hey, you’re Alysa Liu, right?”
Alysa has never turned around faster in her life. There you were, right in front of her. You were alone, but you looked even better close up, in real life.
She almost forgets to speak for a split second. “Uh, yeah, that’s me.”
“You’re kinda hard to miss, striped hair and all. I kinda wanna dye mine a similar style.”
Alysa’s hand went up to her hair. “You totally should, you would look amazing.”
“You think?”
“Mhm.” Alysa bit her tongue to stop herself from saying “you’d look good with anything.”
“This is your first time at the American Music Awards, right?”
“Yeah. Kinda surprised I even got invited, to be honest. I don’t have a lot to do with music.”
“I mean, your performance for the Exhibition Gala at the Olympics did go really viral. I can’t seem to avoid it.”
“You’ve seen it?” Alysa tilted her head, surprised.
“Who hasn’t? It’s everywhere.”
“I mean, yeah, that’s true I guess.”
Then, a photographer walked up, asking to take pictures. Alysa felt a little disappointed until she heard you say, “Do you mind if I get a picture of the two of us?”
“You don’t mind? Right?” Alysa shook her head no. The photographer agreed, leading the two of you to the curtains.
After taking the photos, you thanked Alysa and hugged her, and then kept taking individual photos.
On the Uber back to her place, she finds herself searching you up on Instagram. Your account pops up from the first letter of your username.
She keeps it open for a few moments, just soaking in all of your posts. She refreshed the page and saw that your following count had gone up by one. Curious, she clicked into your followings, and her jaw nearly dislocated when she saw that you had started following her.
She checked your shared activity
y/n followed you in May 2026
You followed y/n in Nov 2023
“Holy shit.” She muttered, taking a screenshot, sending it into the group chat with Amber and Isabeau.
alysa: [ 1 attachment ]
alysa: GUYS????
amber: are we serious
isabeau: ?????? is this ai
alysa: omg go kys
But Alysa was smiling so hard that her face hurt.
You two texted to and from, Alysa oversharing and you matching her energy. You were surprisingly funnier than she’d expected, making her laugh even over text.
Two days later, she saw that you had posted an AMAS photo dump.
y/n BUY ME PRADA
styled by @katieqian my girl 🤍
thank you @prada @amas
She liked it immediately, then scrolled through the photos. You looked breathtaking as usual, but the one that really caught her eye was the fifth picture.
It was the candid one that the photographer had taken when you hugged her goodbye.
Her. In your Instagram post. Your post.
She hesitates for a moment, and then she types a comment
alysaxliu: power duo
She checked her DMs hopefully, and sure enough, you had sent two messages.
y/n: hey !! here’s the pics from the amas if you wanted to post any 🤍
y/n: [ three attachments ]
Alysa saved them immediately, liking them.
She typed a response, deleted it, typed another, and deleted it again. She then settled on a response.
alysaxliu: thank you!! i’ll def be posting them, they look amazing.
alysaxliu: btw, i saw your post
alysaxliu: thank you for including me
Her heart flipped in her chest seeing you start typing.
y/n: ofc
y/n: they look unreal
y/n: i saw your comment btw
y/n: might have something to do with you being in the pic
alysaxliu: just u
You liked her reply with a “🤍” and didn’t reply further.
Alysa smiled into her pillow. If anyone had told her three years ago, that she’d be casually texting you, she’d call them crazy and delusional.
The next day, she posted her pics, with only one picture with another person, and that was you. The rest were just individual photos.
You reposted it to your story, and it wasn’t long until the comments rolled in.
y/nism: im starting a rumour
y/nfineshyt: they’re so cute tgt ong
y/nallaroundtheworld: oh how i love this duo
Alysa stared at her phone for a while, then decided to text you.
alysaxliu: wanna grab coffee tgt sometime?
What if you rejected her?
What if you thought she was weird?
What if you-
y/n: sure !! when where?
Holy fucking shit.
alysaxliu: anytime is fine with me
y/n: well it’s not good for me to be seen out in public with someone not in the kpop industry
y/n: maybe i can come over or you can come over to my apartment? i can order some food and stuff.
alysaxliu: i can come over, where’s your apartment?
y/n: [ Google Maps link ]
alysaxliu: tmr, 5 pm okay with you?
y/n: see u then
That day, Alysa spent half an hour picking out the perfect outfit, and an hour perfecting her makeup and hair.
She took the elevator down to her apartment lobby, getting into an Uber since there wasn’t free parking near your place. It was some high-end apartment complex that Alysa won’t ever even dream about living in. The drive there took roughly an hour.
Her heart nearly stopped when she stepped out and saw you.
“Hey.” You smiled, taking her hand. “They won’t let you in if they don’t recognise you.
“H- hey.” Alysa blushed from her stutter and your hand in hers.
She followed you into the escalator, taking it up to your floor.
You made her take off her shoes before entering, her jaw nearly dropping when she saw your place. It wasn’t really minimalist, but not too over the top as well.
You ordered takeout, refused to let Alysa pay you back, and ate while talking about everything under the moon. Mainly it was you who talked and Alysa who listened while staring at you, mesmerised.
“I noticed that you’ve been following me since 2023.” You brought it up casually. Alysa nearly chokes on her Coke. “Are you a pre-debut fan of Katseye?”
“Uh, yeah.” She smiled sheepishly. “Caught in 4k I guess.”
“Well, it’s an honour to know that the Alysa Liu is an Eyekon.”
“Are you kidding? I can’t even believe that you know I exist?”
“You’re an Olympian, Alysa.”
“Okay, but you’re y/n.”
After finishing your food, you invited Alysa to check out your room. “It’s nothing like the rest of my house, you wouldn’t believe it.”
She had doubts when you said that, but when she walked in, she was proven wrong.
Your entire room smelled faintly of vanilla and was filled with posters of bands, Marvel, and a bunch of fandoms that she wasn’t a part of. A fourth of your room was empty, the very front had a floor-to-ceiling mirror and had wood flooring instead of a white carpet. You had a queen-sized bed tucked into the corner, a beanbag and a walk-in closet.
“So that’s where I practice alone.” You pointed at the wood floor. “And that’s where I become a chud.” You pointed at your bed. It was filled almost a third of the way with plushies, the sheets unmade and messy.
Alysa eventually loosened up and ended up on the beanbag while you lay in your bed, head on her shoulder, both of you doomscrolling. You were so close that she could smell the scent of apple in your hair and you could hear her heartbeat going five hundred miles an hour.
“I have practice in like, an hour.” You suddenly spoke up while later, breaking the silence. “I’ll still text you though.”
“Oh, okay, that’s fine.” Alysa tried to hide her disappointment. She wanted to soak in your presence for a little longer, but knew you had more important matters to deal with.
You went over to your closet, picking out a loose shirt that said “IDGAF” in bold red print and a pair of grey sweats, closing the closet door to change.
“You like this outfit?” You stepped out of the closet, fully dressed.
Alysa looked up, nodding.
She called an Uber and you went down to the parking lot, waving her goodbye.
At HYBE, you met up with Lara and Yoonchae, and waited for Daniela, Megan and Sophia to show up. Using that time, you texted Alysa.
y/n: u got home safe?
alysaxliu: yes lol, thx
alysaxliu: u at hybe?
y/n: yup lol, waiting for the rest to show up
alysaxliu: whatchu going tdy?
y/n: nothing special, just filming a dance practice.
alysaxliu: be careful
You reacted “🤍” to her message
y/n: gotta go, they’re all here
alysaxliu: okayy
You smiled at your phone before putting it into your bag
“Girl you’re never this happy before practice, who are you texting? Must be a miracle worker.” Daniela side-eyed you suspiciously
“Nobody.” You replied, a little too fast.
After practice, you and Yoonchae were getting to your cars before getting caught by sasaeng fans. One of them was trying to hug you, and you hugged her back. Yoonchae meanwhile, ignored the camera filming her, trying to hide.
You finally managed to get rid of them, and Yoonchae huffed. “You’re too nice to turn, rewarding their bad behaviour. You need to stand up for yourself.”
You simply shrugged. “I mean, I don’t like sasaengs, but they’re still Eyekons, so I still kind of appreciate them.”
She rolled her eyes, but didn’t push it further.
Alysa was in her dorm, scrolling on Twitter when she saw the video.
“ KATSEYE Y/N AND YOONCHAE spotted after practice “
The video showed the sasaengs surrounding you, filming you and hugging you. You were clearly overwhelmed, yet still entertaining them.
She immediately texted you.
alysaxliu: hey i js saw the video
alysaxliu: u good?
y/n: yeah lmao
y/n: i love my eyekons
alysaxliu: okay, stay safe alr?
y/n: okay cutie
Alysa nearly drops her phone on her face.
alysaxliu: look who’s talking
After a few months of subtly flirting back and forth, you and she are comfortable enough to lie together in bed together.
To be honest, you still affected Alysa the way you had affected her back in May. It still felt unreal when she had your arms wrapped around her in her dorm bed. But now she’s much more comfortable with you, not as tense.
Somewhere along the way, you had become reliant on Alysa. She had been the one to support you after every hard practice, every mistake, every meltdown.
The first kiss was sudden and unexpected. You were cooking in your apartment, and Alysa was sitting on the kitchen counter. She was just looking at you, studying the way you moved.
“Taste the soup.” You held the spoon to her lips, snapping her out of her daze.
“Huh? Oh.” She sipped it, nodding in approval. “Tastes good.”
Neither of you moved for a moment, her eyes following you for a second too long.
You went back to the stove and continued stirring the soup. Alysa got off the countertop, leaning next to you.
“You’re good at this.” She tentatively tucked a piece of stray hair behind your ear.
“You think?”
“Mhm.”
Alysa moved closer, wrapping her arm around your shoulders and pulling you to her side.
You looked up at her, smiling, spoon still in hand. Alysa cupped your face, leaning in close enough to smell that apple flavour in your hair that she loved. She gave you enough time to pull away if you wanted to. When you didn’t, she pulled you in to press her lips against yours.
It was soft, everything that Alysa had ever dreamed of. Your reaction was buffered for a second before you kissed her back.
She pulled away first, burying her face in your neck, her breathing heavy and unstable.
“I can’t believe I just did that.” She breathed out, lifting her head from your shoulder.
“And I can’t believe you just did that.” You laughed.
“No like, three years ago I was sure you’d never know I even existed and now I’m in your apartment and I just-“
“Yeah, yeah, I know.” You cupped her cheek and pressed a short kiss to the corner of her lips.
“So, I’ll take it as you like me too?”
“Yes I do, Alysa, I like you a lot.”
“Does it mean I can kiss you again?”
You kissed her cheek. “Yes, it does, silly. As many times as you want.”
You were constantly busy, but you still managed to make time for Alysa. You started going to practice in her clothes, going to her place instead of your own after practice.
Alysa discovered that you were actually a pretty clingy girlfriend. You needed constant attention, and it was practically impossible to pry you off after a rough day.
Every night, she found herself lying next to you, arm around your waist, your leg thrown over hers. You would be in her clothes, and occasionally press a kiss to her cheek, and she would blush every time.
You practically lived at her apartment, but Alysa wasn’t complaining. It was every Eyekon’s dream- to have their bias in their arms every night.
You did end up dying your hair like Alysa’s for the iconic by mistake music video. You dyed it the opposite of how she did, so it was more matching than the same.
Once, you were looking for her portable charger when you came across something that looked like a photo book. Curiosity took over you, and you opened it. You were met with your face. You flicked through the pages. It was filled with every photocard of yours, every single one since your debut.
“Alysa?” You called out, still looking through the binder.
When she opened the door and saw you holding it, her first reaction was denial.
“I-“ She started, but you cut her off.
“Didn’t know you were such a big fan of me.”
“This is so embarrassing.”
“It’s cute.”
“You’re just saying that.”
“No, I’m serious. It’s cute.”
You kissed her neck, and muttered, “Everything you do is cute.”
Summary: What happens when you fall in love with your childhood best friend, and better yet? When she falls in love with you too? How does the media react when they find out?
Disclaimer: Slow burn, Fem! reader, Minor angst at the beginning, Use of Y/n, unedited and written on mobile, Title is inspired by Ruin the Friendship by Taylor Swift
。 ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ 。
A/n: I’m fully aware this isn’t the fic ive been teasing that will be out soon but this came to my mind and i couldn’t get it out. It’s also 3am and I just finished this so chose kindness please 💔
You and Alysa had been best friends since middle school, a few years after she decided that she was done with figure skating you got together. Something had changed between how you saw each other during the pandemic, maybe it was because you could spend more time together due to a lack of school and Alysa’s practice and competitions. Or maybe you always felt something, but it never made itself known, until your first relationship and subsequent breakup.
You had crushes before, discussing them with your best friend in pillow forts. Trying to muffle giggles as to not wake anyone else up in the house. But something changed when you got into your first relationship, you were in the beginning of your freshman year. Having no prior relationship experiences you just want with the flow, never feeling a real connection to the girl you were dating. Alysa began to pull back from the friendship when the two of you got together.
She excused it by telling you homework or practice was the reason you guys weren’t hanging out much. The real reason was she couldn’t stand seeing you with someone else. It hurt not being around your best friend all the time, and then one day you were standing in front of your locker with your girlfriend when Alysa walked by.
You had tried to call out to her, but she ignored you and kept walking by. Your girlfriend noticed the look of anguish on your face, and the pure love in your eyes when you looked at her.
“You don’t want to be with me, you want Alysa. And that’s okay, I will never fault anyone for what their heart wants. But I do want you to be happy.” And with that, the girl walked away.
You stood there bewildered, did you just get broken up with? While being ghosted by your best friend? Were you in love with Alysa? You thought about the way Alysa made you feel, like you were the only person in the universe at any given moment. The way her smile brought butterflies to your stomach, and how you longed to be close to her even when you were sitting next to each other.
Tears sprung to your eyes as you stood in the hall, and you quickly closed your locker and went to the nearest bathroom. Not wanting to embarrass yourself by crying publicly, at least in the bathrooms girls are less likely to judge. I mean who doesn’t cry in the high school bathroom, right?
The tears weren’t from being broken up with for the first time, no it was because you were helplessly in love with your best friend. They were because she was ignoring you, and you didn’t know why. You pulled yourself together in the bathroom, wiping your eyes, before going to class.
Two weeks later, schools were shut down, and Alysa was still barely talking to you. Whenever you texted her, she told you she would talk to you later for one reason or another.
Alysa had no idea about the breakup, how would she? She was sulking in her own heartache and jealousy. She never knew she was the jealous type, until she saw you and your girlfriend holding hands and kissing. Alysa didn’t mean to pull away from the friendship, but it was easier than feeling the pang of heartache every time she saw you and remembered you were someone else’s.
One afternoon of crying about how much you missed Alysa, you had enough of the silence between the two of you, it was killing you. All you wanted was your best friend back, so you did the sensible reasonable thing and walked to her house and knocked on the front door.
Alysa opened the door, and was surprised to see you. Her heart clenched at the sight of your red and puffy eyes, hair disheveled, and most importantly wearing one of her hoodies.
Her father called out, asking who was at the door, “It’s just Y/n!” She called back before turning to face you again, “Y/n what are you-” But before Alysa could finish speaking, you cut her off.
“I can’t handle the fact that you’re ignoring me, I literally cannot sleep at night. I text you, and you tell me ‘I’m busy I’ll text you later’, but later never comes. You have been barely speaking to me for the last two months, and I miss you Lys. So much, I just want my best friend back.” Your voice cracked, and a fresh set of tears made their way to your eyes. “I don’t know if I did anything wrong, but please just tell me if I did so i can right my wrongs. I can’t lose you Lys, I can’t handle it.”
By time you were done with your speech, you were full on sobbing on her door step. Alysa don’t even say anything before pulling you into a hug, she really hadn’t realized how much her distance had affected you. She selfishly pulled away to try and protect herself, which only hurt the both of you.
“You didn’t do anything wrong Y/n, it was me. I got jealous of how much time you spent with your girlfriend.” Alysa pulled back, explaining herself without fully telling the truth. Telling the truth would out her feelings and possibly ruin the friendship.
“Come on inside, we can talk and hangout, okay?” Alysa offered, stepping aside to let you in.
The two of you made your way to her bedroom, different medals hung around the wall, along side pictures. Photos of you and her at competitions, you hugging her memories of the two of you jumping up and down excited at her accomplishments. There was also just pictures of you she had taken, ranging from when you were both in middle school to the most recent ones a few months ago. Her room was a reflection of everything that was her, there were some clothes scattered around the room, photos that hadn’t been put up yet, pictures of her little siblings. Her room had barely changed, save for maybe a few pictures hung up.
The two of you plopped onto her bed, as if no time had passed. For a second there was a comfortable silence, until you broke it.
“We broke up.” There wasn’t any detectable emotion in your voice, you were just stating a fact.
“Y/n why didn’t you tell me? When did this happen?” Alysa turned to face you, worry lacing her words.
You shrugged, “Uhm a few weeks ago, and I tried to talk to you. But you were ignoring me.” You paused for a moment before continuing, “I’m not mad at you, but how about next time you just talk to me. Nobody will ever take priority over you Lys, ever.”
The smile you flashed her melted her heart, part of her forgot the effect you had on her. But she would much rather suffer being in love with you in silence, than ruin the friendship between the two of you.
“I promise, I’ll always come to you instead of ghosting.” She held out her pinky for you to wrap yours around, a childish but sacred gesture in the friendship, “Do you wanna talk about the breakup?”
“She just didn’t wanna be with me anymore I guess,” You lied, “but it doesn’t hurt the way I thought it was supposed to.”
Alysa grabbed your hand, giving it a small squeeze, “It’s okay that you don’t feel how you thought you should, everyone’s different. She just wasn’t the right person for you.”
Because the right person was laying next to you, gently holding your hand. You wanted to tell her, and God she wanted to tell you too. But both of you were too afraid, afraid of rejection, afraid of it not working, afraid of loosing each other.
So instead, you guys just talked. Catching up on what you guys missed. And that night you spent the night, just like old times. Whispering and giggling late into the night.
A few days passed, and every day you guys either hung out or FaceTimed. The two of you were inseparable like no time had passed. Today Alysa was over at your house, sitting on your bed while you sat at your vanity. Doing your makeup and talking to Alysa about some video game you had played.
“You know, you should like make videos. Like, you could do ones where you play different games or like where you just talk and do your makeup. I would watch those, and I’m sure a lot of other people would.” Alysa suggested, it was an off handed comment but you thought she was right.
Making videos could be fun, so that’s exactly what you did. And a few weeks later? Your videos began to go viral, you weren’t expecting them to go viral by any means. Alysa was elated when she noticed your view and follower count begin to go up, she was your number one supporter.
“I told you that you should post videos, your voice just has something about it that makes watching your videos soothing and entertaining.” She told you over the phone.
You rolled her eyes at her, “Okay whatever, this is probably just like a small thing that’ll fizzle out soon.”
But it didn’t, your follow count went up as did your views. And before you knew it, you were being offered brand deals. When you got your first one, you called Alysa screaming with excitement. At first she couldn’t make out what you were saying, but once you had calmed down a bit you repeated yourself.
“I just got my first brand deal! It’s a makeup brand, they want me to try out their new product and review it!” You were buzzing with excitement, you hadn’t told anyone yet.
As soon as you saw the email, you called Alysa. She was the first person you went to about everything. She would appear in videos with you, sometimes doing different challenges that had gone viral, other times she was just in the background.
Soon your fans began to make comments speculating about your guys’ relationship. For a year or so you ignored them, brushing them off, refusing to acknowledge them. Because it was true, you were in love with Alysa Liu, your best friend.
Two years later, Alysa confided in you how done she was with figure skating. She began to hate it, she dreaded going to practice and to even go out on the ice. There were many days after practice she would cry to you about how tired she was. She could not handle it anymore, but she decided to hold out until after the 2022 Beijing Olympics. You were right there beside her, supporting her and cheering her on knowing she had zero intention of winning.
When Alysa decided to officially retire from figure skating, a selfish part of you was ecstatic due to the fact you would have more time to hangout with her. You were proud of her for making that decision, and for being able to begin her healing journey. She no longer stepped foot on the ice, let alone near it. Alysa had so much more time to just be herself, to truly figure out who she was.
You loved being apart of her healing journey. And a year later the two of you went off to college together, Alysa studying psychology and you majoring in media marketing and minoring in film. The two of you told each other everything, went off to college together, studied together, stayed the night in each others dorms, shared every detail of your lives.
Yet, there was still a huge secret you guys each kept from one another. The fact that both of you were helplessly in love with the other.
That was, until after Alysa’s skiing trip, the one where she decided she desperately wanted to skate again. After stepping foot back on the ice, claiming she was just trying to have some fun, she realized she wanted to compete again. You listened as she went back and forth with her coach, who finished many glasses of wine while talking to her, silently listening as she insisted this is what she wanted. And she did, you had tried doing the same thing, talk her out of it.
“Y/n, I want to compete again. Not for any medals, but for myself. To preform, to feel that rush of adrenaline, you know? I’m not that little girl anymore, I will not allow anyone to control what I do. Every skate will be on my terms, if I’m tired? I will leave the rink, and if I feel like I need more practice? I’ll do that. I’m going to control what I do, and honestly when I do it.” Alysa spoke with such determination in her voice, you couldn’t help but smile at her.
“I love you so much Lys, and I’m so proud of you.” Is all you could say, shaking your head and smiling at her.
Alysa felt the familiar ache in her chest when you said that. ‘I love you so much Lys’, this feeling might kill her. And in that moment, Alysa decided to do the one thing she thought she could never do, confess her feelings.
“Y/n?” She spoke your name with a sudden tenderness, a shift had happened from between thirty seconds ago until now.
“Yeah?” You responded, curious about the shift in tone.
“I’m in love with you, like fully and whole heartedly in love with you. And I have been for years, and I don’t except you to feel the same way but I need to be honesty with you. I don’t want anything between us to change, I just needed to tell you.” Alysa was nervous, in a way that you had never seen before.
You couldn’t help the grin that spread across your face, wordlessly you threw your arms around her, unable to contain yourself. “I love you Lys, I’m in love with you. I just…I was scared. Scared that you wouldn’t feel the same way, or that you’d leave me again.”
Alysa’s heart ached in a different way when you said that last part, ‘leave me again’. She remembers the toll that it took on you when she ghosted you for nearly two months. The way you showed up on her doorstep, hysterical, begging for her to just speak to you, to tell you what you had ‘done wrong’. She gently pulled away from the hug, keeping her arms loosely around your waist and looking you in the eye.
“‘m never going anywhere, I will always be right here. Nothing will ever change that.” Alysa paused for a moment, before a surge of confidence came over her, “You free Saturday?”
“Uhm, yeah I’m pretty sure? Why?” You asked, confused.
“Well whatever you have planned, clear your schedule. We are gonna go on a date, a real one, I dunno what yet. But I’ll plan it, all you have to do is get dolled up, alright?” She smirked at you while she said the last bit.
You felt your body heat up under her flirty gaze, suddenly feeling shy. Something you hadn’t felt since the two of you met back in middle school.
“Does this mean we’re together?” You asked hesitantly, realizing that this was uncharted territory between the two of you.
“Hmm, depends on if you wanna go out with me on Saturday.” Alysa teased, the smirk on her face turning into a grin.
“Of course I do, Lys, I’ve been dreaming of this moment since freshman year. You know, the reason me and my ex broke up was because she realized I was in love with you before I did. That’s why that breakup didn’t hurt, that’s why I cried myself to sleep most nights when we weren’t talking. Because I thought I was losing you, I pushed my feelings down. Scared if you knew, I’d lose you for forever.” You confessed, tears springing to your eyes. Relief from the last for years of hiding your secret rushing over you.
Alysa softly cupped your face with her hands and wiped your tears with her thumbs, gently caressing your face, “You’re never going to lose me, my love.”
You continued to cry as Alysa brought one hand to your back to try and soothe you, and the other guided your head to lie on her shoulder.
“It’s okay, I’m right here.” Alysa comforted you, pressing a small kiss to the top of your head.
That night, the two of you slept in Alysa’s bed, something you had done a million times. But this time it was different, softer. The air between you felt different, comfortable, but different in a way you couldn’t place. You laid your head on her chest as the two of you watched your favorite movie on her laptop. One arm wrapped around your shoulder, mindlessly playing with your hair.
Alysa’s heart was so full, she finally had full control over her life, and she had confessed years worth of feelings to the girl she loved more than anything.
The next four days dragged on, both of you were buzzing with anticipation for your date. Saturday morning you woke up early in your dorm room, alone, as Alysa insisted it was crucial that the two of you did not see each other before your first date. You had decided the night before you would film a little get ready with me/day in my life as you needed to post another video. Plus why not film something you were genuinely excited for.
You texted Alysa, telling her good morning knowing damn well she was still asleep, before setting up the phone you used strictly to record with on your desk. You turned on the lights behind the phone, making sure that the lighting was right before you hit the film button.
“Alright guys, today’s video is gonna be a little longer and a little different. So get ready with me slash spend a day with me before my first date.” Your face and voice conveyed the amount of excitement you were feeling as you spoke.
As you began priming your face, you talked a little bit about this mystery girl you were going out with, careful to not giveaway any identifying details. After you were done with your makeup, you grabbed a few different outfits and held them up to the phone.
“I have no idea what we’re going to be doing, so I need a pretty versatile outfit. I’m gonna try on this one and see how it feels.” You paused the camera before changing into your first outfit choice.
“I’m not too sure about this one, so I’m gonna try on the other one before making a decision.” You gave a twirl in the camera and lifted up your leg to show off the shoes you were wearing.
Once more you paused the recording to change into your next outfit. It was a pair of flared jeans with butterfly designs, one on the thigh and one on the shin of the pants. Accompanied by a red checkered flowy baby-doll tank top with little ribbons tied to the straps, with a pair of red MaryJane style heals.
“Okay guys, I honestly do think that this is the one. I’m thinking this necklace,” You grabbed a small heart necklace that Alysa had gotten you a few years ago for your birthday. “And these little cherry earrings, to like pull everything together, and this red purse? It’s got these cute little ribbons that I put on it a while back. Plus just some bracelets.”
After everything on, you decided that you needed a smidge more blush and a red lip to pull everything together.
“Okay guys, I think this is the outfit. I’m just gonna leave my hair as it is,” Your hair was styled in its natural state, nothing really done to it. “I will probably have to come back and touch up my makeup before I actually leave for my date but this feels right.”
As you spoke, you heard your phone buzz from your desk. You quickly paused and saved the video, before checking your phone. Alysa had finally woken up, and had texted you back. You smiled as you responded to her message, teasing her about how long she had slept.
You filmed a few snippets of your walk to one of your favorite cafes and ordered a drink. After getting your drink you made your way to a floral shop to pick out some flowers for Alysa for your date later.
However, it seemed as though Alysa had the same idea. As you were heading out of the store, Alysa walked in.
When Alysa spotted you, she quickly covered her eyes with her hand, “It’s bad luck to see you before!”
You smiled and rolled your eyes, before correcting her, “That’s weddings, not dates.”
Alysa shrugged, hand still covering her eyes, “Well same difference, now go back to your dorm so I can continue my perfect plan.”
“You’re so bossy, I don’t even know what your plan is.” You sighed, really just wanting to go on this mysterious date now, anticipation killing you.
Alysa peeked through her fingers, “Yes that’s the point, now go.”
You laughed at her antics before giving her a kiss on the cheek before walking back to your dorm. Thirty minutes later, Alysa showed knocked on your door.
“These are for you, my love.” Alysa said, holding out a bouquet of your favorite flowers with a smile on her face.
You took them, whispering a ‘thank you’ before turning around to place the flowers down and grab the ones you got her. Alysa shut the door behind her, coming in to sit on your bed for a few minutes while you put back on your shoes.
“I got these for you.” You said, with a sheepish smile on your face.
Alysa put on a dramatized look of shock, as she had already seen them, before pulling you into her by the waist. “They’re beautiful.”
𑣲 would be sooo cocky about it. she’s proud of you and takes pride in being your girlfriend. just thinks you’re the coolest alive.
𑣲 would try to get you into her music interests, like get you to dance to newjeans while saying “it’ll be fun” and “your fans would love this”.
𑣲 tries to be nonchalant about it but can’t help herself. would probably post pics with you in the background like “private but not secret” but post too much. like amber, she would repost your edits and act like another girl in the fandom.
𑣲 would take care of you and the way you treat yourself. when you’re having a hard time or being too hard on yourself she would talk nice and sweet to you.
“…. and then i stepped on the wrong feet and felt dizzy about the whole choreography. i just know it seems off.” you complained, leaving your hand to softly smack your thigh as you sigh in frustration.
“hey, i’m sure nobody knows you’re supposed to step on the right foot instead of the left one. just relax. i watched it and it was awesome. everyone is talking about how cool it looked.”
𑣲 wears your merch religiously. even when she’s just training, she loves it and would make isabeau and amber wear it too.
𑣲 forcing her to do pop trends/cute tiktoks with you because she says she’s “too cool for that”. learns the manchild dance anyways.
𑣲 because you’re slightly more feminine than her she loves the contrast between both of you. loves when her lips gets shiny after kissing you when you’re wearing lipgloss or the lipstick marks you leave on her face. also when you get your nails done with an A on one of them.
𑣲 isabeau getting her makeup done to one of your songs and alysa instantly blushing and giggling but dancing with her while they get ready.
𑣲 would post a video saying “they don’t know she’s going home with me tonight.” in white font as she records your sold out arena on her side acc.
(a/n) hey my bbs, hope you enjoy this little (long) fluff piece. 🫶🏻💋 you’re a quiet and shy literature and art major that is paired with chaotic figure skating star Alysa Liu in UCLA's Room 314, you document your shifting boundaries through a private diary of objective "facts" to hide your growing feelings.
The late-August heat was still clinging heavily to the brick facade of the dorm building, but inside Dorm Room 314, the air conditioning was humming a steady, low tune.
You sat on the edge of your neatly stripped mattress, surrounded by cardboard boxes that smelled faintly of your parents’ attic. You’d always been the quiet type—happiest when lost in the margins of a sketchbook or buried deep in a classic novel where the world made sense. The thought of sharing a few hundred square feet with a complete stranger had been giving you low-grade anxiety for weeks.
Then, the door flew open.
"Alright, dynamic duo status starts... now," a bright, energetic voice announced.
You blinked, looking up from a stack of art history textbooks. Standing in the doorway was Alysa. She was a vibrant contrast to the sterile, beige dorm walls. Her hair was a cool, alternative mix of blonde and dark brown stripes, framing a face that instantly radiated warmth. When she flashed a wide, teasing grin, a silver smiley piercing peeked out from beneath her upper lip.
"Hey! I'm Alysa," she said, dropping a massive duffel bag onto the empty bed opposite yours. She didn't wait for the awkward, hesitant silence that usually followed first meetings. Instead, she bounded over and extended a hand. "Psych major, terrible at unpacking, and officially your new roommate."
"I'm—" You cleared your throat gently, her energy completely enveloping the room. "I'm [Y/N]. Nice to meet you. I'm doing art and literature."
"Oh, wow, a cultured queen," Alysa beamed, her eyes lighting up as she spun around to survey the room. "I love that. You're going to have to decorate the common areas because if it's left to me, it's just going to be posters of psychological thrillers and random thrift store finds."
As the afternoon unfolded, Alysa proved to be a whirlwind of outgoing charm. She did most of the talking, which you were secretly incredibly grateful for. While you carefully aligned your books by color and hung up a few delicate sketches, Alysa casually tossed her clothes into drawers, pausing every few minutes to engage you.
"So, literature, huh? Are we talking heavy angst or poetry?" she asked, leaning against her desk chair.
"A bit of both," you admitted softly, a small smile tugging at your lips. "What about you? What do you do when you're not studying how the human brain works?"
Alysa laced her fingers behind her head, leaning back. "Well, I figure skate. Pretty much competitively, so if I'm ever waking up at 5:00 AM in a complete daze, just throw a pillow at me. I promise I won't take it personally."
"Figure skating? That's amazing," you said, genuinely impressed by the discipline it took.
"It's fun! Brutal on the knees, but fun," she laughed.
As evening began to bleed into a soft, bruised purple twilight, the ambient noise in the hallway picked up. Bass from a speaker down the hall vibrated through the floorboards.
Alysa was adjusting a funky, multicolored rug in the center of the room when a knock sounded on the open door. A girl from down the hall popped her head in. "Hey, a bunch of us are doing a little mix-and-mingle get-together downstairs in the common room. You guys should come!"
"Oh, absolutely, count me in," Alysa said dynamically, before turning her gaze to you. "You coming, roomie?"
You shifted your weight, looking down at your hands, suddenly feeling very small against the backdrop of college social life. "Oh, um... thanks, but I think I'll pass. It's not really my thing. I think I'm just going to stay in and unwind."
You braced yourself for the standard, pushy "Oh, come on, just for five minutes!" that extroverts usually gave. But Alysa just offered a warm, understanding melt of a smile.
"Well, okay then," she said easily, grabbing her lanyard. "But I promise if there’s anything good down there, I’ll steal it and bring it up!"
Just after midnight, the room was bathed in a cozy, amber glow. You had turned off the harsh overhead fluorescent lights, opting instead for the warm fairy lights you’d strung across your headboard. You were tucked beneath your duvet, completely relaxed, reading peacefully on your Kindle.
The lock clicked, and the door pushed open.
Alysa stumbled in, looking a little flushed and utterly triumphant. Before you could even greet her, she marched over to your bed and tossed a barrage of items onto your comforter: a jar of marshmallow fluff, a jar of peanut butter, and a pack of Oreos.
Then, without a single shred of hesitation, she plopped herself right down at the foot of your bed, completely invading your personal space in the most endearing way possible.
"Okay, SO," Alysa panted lightly, a huge, victorious grin spreading across her face. "I swiped those because that was literally the best they had down there. Total letdown on the party snacks. BUT, I foresaw this tragedy, went to the store down the street, and got us ice cream to share."
She proudly brandished a pint of vanilla bean ice cream from a plastic bag.
You sat there in absolute shock, your Kindle lowering slightly. You weren't used to people being this comfortable with you so quickly, let alone sitting on your bed at midnight sharing contraband snacks. A soft, breathless laugh escaped your lips. "Alysa—"
"I’m telling you, I love taking marshmallow fluff and then scooping the ice cream into it. It’s super good, you seriously have to try it," she interrupted enthusiastically, already unscrewing the fluff lid. She began rummaging through the plastic bag for a utensil. "Wait..."
Her face fell slightly as she realized the bag was empty. She looked down, then slowly pulled a plastic spoon out from between her own lips.
"Fuck! I dropped the second one on the walk back," she groaned, looking at the single spoon in her hand, then up at you with a mischievous, completely unbothered twinkle in her eyes. "Oh well. Here. I'm sure you're not scared of germs."
She extended the spoon toward you, her smiley piercing glinting under your fairy lights, waiting to see if her quiet, soft roommate was ready to break the ice.
You looked from the spoon, to the ice cream, and then up to Alysa’s expectant, bright eyes. The absolute lack of boundaries should have overwhelmed you, but looking at her, you just felt a strange, sudden warmth blooming in your chest.
You took the spoon.
"If I get sick, you're bringing me soup," you murmured, dipping it into the marshmallow fluff.
Alysa let out a loud, victorious laugh, throwing her head back. "Deal, roomie. Deal."
Later that night, long after Alysa had fallen asleep, her breathing soft and even from across the room, you lay awake under the fading glow of your fairy lights. Your mind was buzzing. You reached into your backpack, pulled out the leather-bound journal you usually reserved for poetry, and flipped to the first blank page.
You needed a place to put all this new, overwhelming energy.
♡
September 4th
It has been exactly two weeks since move-in day. Living with Alysa is a bit like living inside a pinball machine...everything is fast, colorful, and loud. But I'm adjusting. I’ve started keeping track of the little things, mostly so I don't accidentally step on her toes, but also because she’s the most fascinating person I’ve ever met.
Fact #1: Alysa is obsessed with Lucky Charms. But here’s the catch...she doesn't actually care about the cereal part. She is fiercely, exclusively loyal to the marshmallows. I watched her spend ten minutes yesterday meticulously picking out every single green shamrock and pink heart, leaving a sad, discarded mountain of oat pieces in the bowl. She claims the oats are just 'the packing peanuts of the breakfast world.' It’s completely chaotic, but I find myself laughing every time she does it.
The scratch of your pen stopped as the dorm door clicked open.
Alysa trudged into the room, looking utterly exhausted. Her striped hair was damp and pulled back into a messy ponytail, and she was carrying her heavy duffel bag over one shoulder. The smell of the ice rink—cold, sharp, and metallic—followed her inside. She had just gotten back from a grueling three-hour evening practice.
"I am officially a corpse," she groaned, dropping her bag with a heavy thud and collapsing face-first onto her bed. "Don't look at me. I am no longer a psychology student. I am just a block of ice."
You closed your journal quietly, setting it on your nightstand. A soft smile crossed your face as you looked over at her. "Tough practice?"
"My coach made me run my program three times back-to-back," her muffled voice came from the pillow. "My legs are jelly. And I'm starving, but I'm too tired to even walk down to the vending machines."
You rolled off your bed, stepping over the rug in your socks. "Well, lucky for you, I happen to know the cure for frozen, exhausted figure skaters."
Alysa rolled over onto her side, blinking up at you tiredly. "Yeah? What's that?"
You walked over to your desk, reaching behind your stack of literature textbooks, and pulled out a bright red box. Beside it, you set down a small, separate ziplock bag you'd spent your free afternoon hour filling.
"I bought a fresh box," you said softly, holding up the cereal. Then, you jiggled the plastic baggy, which was filled to the brim with nothing but pastel-colored, dehydrated marshmallows. "And I did some pre-sorting for you. No 'packing peanuts' allowed."
Alysa’s eyes instantly went wide, all the exhaustion vanishing from her face in a split second. She sat up straight, a massive, radiant grin spreading across her face, her smiley piercing catching the dim light of the room.
"Oh my god," Alysa gasped, putting her hands over her heart dramatically. "Are you an angel? Did you drop down from the literature heavens just to save my life? You actually picked out the marshmallows for me?!"
"Maybe," you laughed softly, grabbing a bowl and a spoon from your shelf. "But you're still doing the dishes."
"I will literally clean the whole room," she promised, hopping off the bed and instantly trailing after you like a golden retriever, completely invading your space to watch you pour the bowl. As you stood side-by-side by the small counter, the heat of her shoulder brushing against yours, you realized your quiet, predictable life was officially over—and you didn't want it back.
♡
September 18th
Four weeks in now, and our room is finally starting to look like a shared space. My art prints are hanging right next to her anime posters, which is a surprisingly aesthetic contrast. I’ve realized that Alysa’s brain never really turns off...even when she’s supposed to be relaxing.
Fact #2: Alysa is a massive anime fan, and she is completely hyper-fixated on Jujutsu Kaisen. If she has a spare thirty minutes between classes or after a morning on the ice, she’s glued to her iPad watching it. She gets incredibly animated during the fight scenes, literally throwing air punches from her desk chair. Her absolute top three characters are Maki, Nobara, and Shoko, which makes perfect sense because they are all unapologetically badass, confident, and independent women...just like her. She claims the 'JJK women carry the entire show on their backs,' and while I’m still figuring out who is who, watching her eyes light up when they're on screen is my favorite part of the weekend.
The rhythmic sound of page flips was suddenly drowned out by a dramatic gasp from across the room.
You looked up from your poetry anthology to see Alysa practically vibrating in her desk chair. Her iPad was propped up against a stack of psychology textbooks, and her hands were clutched to her chest. She was wearing an oversized hoodie, her distinctive blonde and brown striped hair tied up in a loose, messy bun.
"Oh my god, she is such a badass," Alysa groaned loudly, dropping her forehead onto the desk with a heavy thud of pure adoration.
You let out a soft laugh, resting your book on your lap. "Everything okay over there?"
Alysa immediately lifted her head, spinning her chair around to face you. Her eyes were wide and full of frantic, excited energy. "No! Everything is amazing. I am literally hyperventilating. Maki Zen'in just completely dominated a fight with a cursed tool and I am so in love with her it hurts. I need a therapist, and I'm studying to be one!"
You smiled warmly, leaning back against your pillows. "Is this the jujutsu show again?"
"Yes! Jujutsu Kaisen," Alysa said, her eyes lighting up as she hopped out of her chair. In true Alysa fashion, she completely ignored the concept of personal space and crossed the room, dropping onto the edge of your bed. She crossed her legs, leaning in close. "Okay, so remember how I told you about my holy trinity? Maki, Nobara, and Shoko?"
"The girl with the glasses, the one with the hammer, and the tired doctor?" you murmured, your heart doing a slight, nervous flip at how close she was sitting. You could smell the faint scent of her perfume.
"Yes! Exactly!" Alysa beamed, thrilled that you had actually remembered. She used her hands to emphasize every word. "Nobara is literally a fashion icon who will curse you with a straw doll, Shoko is the unbothered queen who heals everyone while running on zero sleep, and Maki? Maki doesn't even have cursed energy but she will literally beat up a god with a wooden staff just to prove a point. They are the blueprint."
You stared at the pure admiration radiating from her, a soft, amused smile playing on your lips. "They sound like exactly your type of people."
"They are masterpieces," Alysa corrected playfully, leaning in just a fraction closer, her smiley piercing catching the amber glow of your fairy lights. "Come on, roomie. You're a literature major. You appreciate incredible, multi-dimensional female characters with tragic backstories. You would love them. Plus, the animation is literally art."
She looked at you with wide, pleading eyes, a teasing smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.
You looked from her iPad back to her hopeful face. You had a giant essay due Monday on 19th-century poetry, but looking at the bright, infectious excitement radiating off your roommate, you realized you didn't care.
"Alright," you said softly, sliding over against the wall to make room for her. "Scoot over. But you have to show me your favorite Maki scene first."
Alysa let out a cheer, scrambling to grab her iPad and diving under your duvet beside you without a second thought. As she pressed play, her shoulder pressed firmly against yours in the small bed, you realized you were completely helpless against whatever domain Alysa had expanded over your life.
♡
October 15th
It happened. The thing I’ve been trying to prevent since late August has officially happened. I think I am falling for my roommate.
Fact #3: Alysa on the ice is a completely different person. On campus, she is chaotic, loud, and full of frantic, wonderful energy. But the second her blades touch the ice, it’s like she commands the entire room. She’s precise. She’s mesmerizing. I went to her inter-club performance showcase last night—the one she casually invited me to by throwing a flyer at my head—and I forgot how to breathe for three solid minutes. Watching her glide across the rink under the spotlight made my chest ache in a way I didn't know how to handle. I’m writing this down to get it out of my head, because she’s my friend, my roommate, and I need to get over it before I make things weird.
The freezing air of the ice rink had cut straight through your denim jacket, but you barely noticed it anymore. The small crowd in the bleachers was cheering loudly as the skater before Alysa finished their routine, but your eyes were locked on the entrance to the ice.
Then, the announcer’s voice echoed through the scratched plexiglass speakers: "Next up, representing our university club, Alysa Liu."
You leaned forward, your hands gripping the cold metal bench. Alysa stepped onto the ice, stripping off her oversized university jacket and tossing it to her coach. She was wearing a deep, midnight-blue skating dress that caught the overhead stadium lights, throwing tiny constellations of glitter across the ice. Her striped hair was pulled back into a tight, slick ponytail, exposing the sharp, confident line of her jaw.
She skated out to the center of the rink, her blades cutting smoothly into the white surface, and took her starting position.
The music swelled...a haunting, beautiful instrumental track.
In an instant, she was moving. The bubbly, energetic girl who had spent the last week picking marshmallows out of cereal and yelling at her iPad screen vanished. In her place was pure, unadulterated grace. She picked up speed, her body leaning effortlessly into a deep edge before she launched herself into the air.
A perfect triple jump. She landed it with a soft clink of steel against ice, her arms extending perfectly.
Your breath caught in your throat. You’d always appreciated art, spent hours dissecting the brushstrokes of Renaissance painters and the rhythm of romantic poetry, but watching Alysa move was a completely different experience. It was kinetic poetry. Every line of her body, the fierce determination in her eyes, the way she effortlessly commanded the empty space around her—it was utterly beautiful.
When her routine ended on a dramatic, spinning crescendo, the crowd erupted. You stood up, clapping so hard your palms stung, a massive, helpless smile on your face. Out on the ice, Alysa was panting, her face flushed pink from the cold and the exertion, throwing her hands up with that familiar, radiant grin. Her smiley piercing glinted under the arena lights as she looked up into the crowd.
Her eyes scanned the bleachers, locking onto you. She waved frantically, blowing a dramatic kiss in your direction.
Your heart gave a violent, terrifying thud against your ribs. A sudden rush of heat flooded your face, and you quickly sat back down, swallowing hard. No, you told yourself, your fingers twisting into the fabric of your jacket. Don't do that. She’s just being Alysa. She's just being friendly.
An hour later, the dorm room door swung open. Alysa practically floated inside, still smelling like the cold rink, a small bouquet of grocery-store flowers tucked under her arm.
"Okay, so the judges gave me a nearly perfect score on my technical elements," she announced proudly, dropping her heavy duffel bag and immediately marching over to your side of the room. She plopped down right on the edge of your bed, completely ignoring the unspoken boundary lines, just like she always did. "But more importantly, did you see me stick that second jump? I swear I thought I was going to face-plant right in front of you."
You swallowed the lump in your throat, closing your textbook. "You were incredible, Alysa. Seriously. I was... I was blown away."
Alysa paused, her bright eyes locking onto yours. The teasing, high-energy facade melted away for a fraction of a second, replaced by a soft, genuine warmth. "Yeah? You really liked it?"
"I loved it," you said softly, your voice barely above a whisper.
Alysa grinned, a slight blush creeping up her neck that had nothing to do with the cold. Before you could react, she leaned forward, wrapping her arms tightly around your shoulders in a sudden, fierce hug. She smelled like ice, vanilla perfume, and achievement.
"Thanks for coming, roomie," she murmured into your shoulder. "It meant a lot having you there."
As you slowly raised your hands to hug her back, feeling the solid, warm weight of her against you, a terrifying wave of clarity washed over you. You didn't just admire her. You wanted to be the person she looked for in every crowded room.
Get a grip, you desperately told yourself, forcing a soft laugh as you pulled back, gently pushing her shoulder. "Yeah, yeah. Just don't let the fame go to your head. You still owe me half a box of marshmallows."
Alysa laughed, the heavy, intimate tension breaking instantly as she scrambled up to find her cereal box. You forced a smile as you watched her, but inside your mind was racing. The diary entries were going to get a lot harder to write.
♡
November 1st
I am completely, undeniably doomed. Last night was supposed to be a fun, harmless Halloween party. Instead, I am currently staring at the ceiling of our dorm room, my heart hammering against my ribs, wondering how I am supposed to survive the rest of the semester.
Fact #4: Alysa does not have a filter, especially when she’s had a drink. And she has absolutely no idea what her words do to me. Case in point: last night she dressed up as Kusuo Saiki from 'The Disastrous Life of Saiki K.' complete with a bright pink wig, green glasses, and the little control devices in her hair. I went as a slightly seductive, ethereal vampire (mostly because I have a massive soft spot for vampire lore, and the velvet corset made me feel brave). When she first saw me, she smirked, leaned in, and whispered, 'Guess I have to watch my neck tonight, or are you planning on biting me later?'
She was joking. I know she was joking. But my brain completely short-circuited. And then, the rest of the night happened.
The sticky, humid air of the frat house party was a blur of flashing strobe lights and loud music, but you and Alysa had carved out your own little corner of chaos. You’d both gotten a little tipsy on cheap jungle juice, laughing hysterically as Alysa adjusted her neon pink wig between songs and tried to "telepathically" make the DJ play her favorite tracks.
By the time you both stumbled back into Room 314 just after 2:00 AM, the buzz was beginning to morph into that warm, heavy, giggly post-party exhaustion.
"Oh my god, get these antennas out of my skull," Alysa groaned, kicking off her sneakers and yanking the green Saiki glasses off her face, tossing them onto her desk.
You let out a soft, tipsy laugh, unzipping your boots. "I told you those hair clips looked sharp."
"Worth it. I was the best-dressed psychic there," she grinned, already tearing at the velcro of her costume. Within minutes, she had stripped down to just her favorite, faded "Rad Dad" oversized t-shirt. She kicked her pants into the corner of the room with a sigh of pure relief. "Nope. Can't be bothered. No pants allowed in the sanctuary."
You shook your head, your face warm as you quickly changed into your own cozy, pink plaid pajama set, eager to get out of the tight corset.
"Okay, but we literally cannot sleep in this makeup," you murmured, looking at your dark, dramatic vampire eyeshadow in the mirror, and then at Alysa, who had pink face paint smudged across her cheek. "Come here, I have the micellar water."
"You're a lifesaver, roomie," Alysa mumbled, stumbling over.
Instead of waiting for you to sit at the desk, Alysa crawled right onto your mattress where you were sitting cross-legged. In her clumsy, tipsy state, she didn't just sit next to you, she crawled right over, unintentionally straddling your lap, her knees framing your thighs as she settled down to face you.
Your breath completely hitched. The sheer proximity was dizzying. Through the thin fabric of your pajamas, you could feel the direct warmth of her skin. She was so close you could see the faint sparkle of her smiley piercing under the amber fairy lights.
"Here, let me do yours first," Alysa whispered, her eyes slightly heavy but full of affection. She took a cotton pad, soaked it in the makeup remover, and gently lifted her hand to your face. Her touch was surprisingly tender, her thumb resting on your cheekbone as she carefully wiped away the dark makeup around your eyes.
You were frozen, your hands trembling slightly as you poured some remover onto a second cotton pad. "My turn," you whispered back, your voice tight.
You reached up, gently wiping the pink smudge from her cheek, then moving to her temples. For a few agonizingly beautiful minutes, the only sound in the room was the hum of the AC and your own ragged breathing. You were taking care of each other, faces inches apart, her oversized tee shifting slightly as she moved. Every instinct in your body wanted to lean forward those final few inches.
"All clean," Alysa finally mumbled, giving your nose a playful boop with her finger.
Then, as if she hadn't just completely shattered your entire reality, she yawned massively, tumbled off your lap, and face-planted directly into her own bed across the room. Within two minutes, she was letting out soft, even breaths, completely passed out.
You sat frozen on your bed for a long time, the silence of the room pressing heavily against your chest. Your hands were shaking as you reached into your nightstand and pulled out your leather-bound journal.
I can't do this anymore.
I am officially cutting these feelings off. Completely. Effective immediately. Alysa is my best friend, my roommate, and she trusts me. She sits on my bed and hugs me and holds my face because she sees me as a safe space, not a romantic interest. If I let myself keep pining like this, I’m going to ruin the best thing that’s happened to me at college. I love our friendship too much to destroy it over a crush. Starting tomorrow, I am just her roommate. Just her friend. No matter how much it hurts.
You snapped the journal shut, shoved it under your pillow, and collapsed back onto your mattress. As you finally let sleep take over, your heart still aching from the ghost of her weight on your lap, you swore to yourself that this would be the last time you ever let yourself want her.
♡
November 24th
My plan to 'just be friends' is failing spectacularly, and it is entirely her fault.
Fact #5: Alysa is a notorious clothing thief. As soon as the November wind chill hit campus, she completely abandoned her own wardrobe. Apparently, my oversized knitted cardigans and soft, worn-in hoodies are 'property of Room 314' now. She claims it’s because my clothes smell infinitely better than her sports-detergent-scented hoodies, but seeing her walk around in things that belong to me is doing terrible things to my resolve. It’s impossible to draw a line between us when she is literally wrapped in my clothes every single day.
The freezing late-November rain was drumming a rhythmic, heavy beat against the dorm window. You pushed the door open with your shoulder, shivering as you stepped inside, your hands full of a heavy stack of library books for your final literature thesis.
You expected the room to be empty, or at least loud with the sound of a Jujutsu Kaisen fight scene. Instead, the room was completely quiet, bathed in the soft, amber glow of your fairy lights.
Alysa was sitting cross-legged in her desk chair, a pair of reading glasses perched on the bridge of her nose as she intensely highlighted a psychology textbook. But what made your heart skip a beat, and your books feel suddenly ten times heavier, was what she was wearing.
It was your favorite, charcoal-gray cable-knit sweater. It was wildly oversized on you, but on Alysa’s petite frame, it completely swallowed her. The hem reached past her thighs, and the sleeves were so long that only the very tips of her fingers peeked out from the cuffs. Her blonde and brown striped hair was twisted up in a messy claw clip, a few loose strands framing her face.
She looked incredibly soft. Incredibly domestic. Incredibly... yours.
"Hey," Alysa said, her face instantly lighting up as she spun her chair around. She didn't even acknowledge that she was wearing your clothes; she just smiled, her smiley piercing glinting in the dim light. "You're freezing! Your nose is so pink."
"It's pouring out there," you murmured, setting your books down on your desk and trying very hard not to stare at the way the collar of your sweater slipped slightly off her shoulder. "And I see you've raided my closet again."
Alysa looked down at herself, letting out a soft, unabashed giggle. She pulled her hands up into the sleeves, flexing her fingers like a kitten. "Listen, I tried to wear my own hoodie today, but it felt like sandpaper compared to this. What detergent do you use? It smells like lavender and vanilla. It’s literally like wearing a hug."
It’s like wearing a hug. Your chest ached at the words. You forced a small smile, turning your back to her to hang up your wet jacket, desperately chanting your mantra in your head: Just friends. Just roommates.
"Anyway, look at this!" Alysa scrambled out of her chair, the oversized sweater swishing around her legs. She bounded over to your side of the room, entirely ignoring the concept of personal space as she always did, and thrust an open notebook into your face. "I'm studying classical conditioning for my midterm, and I finally figured out a way to remember it."
You leaned back slightly against your desk to read her messy handwriting. "Yeah? What's your example?"
"Okay, so the unconditioned stimulus is you buying a fresh box of Lucky Charms," Alysa explained enthusiastically, leaning in close. She was so close you could feel the warmth radiating off her, could smell the distinct lavender scent of your own laundry soap mixed with her vanilla perfume. "The unconditioned response is my brain releasing dopamine. The conditioned stimulus is the sound of the plastic bag crinkling, so now, whenever I hear you open any bag in this room, my mouth literally waters. See? Psychology!"
You couldn't help the soft, breathless laugh that escaped your lips. You looked up from the notebook, intending to tease her, but the words caught in your throat.
Alysa was already looking at you. Her expression had softened, her bright eyes scanning your face. She noticed a stray, damp lock of hair that had escaped your ponytail, clinging to your cheek from the rain outside.
"Hold on," Alysa whispered softly.
Before you could process what was happening, she reached up. Because her hand was tucked inside your oversized sleeve, the incredibly soft, warm wool of your own sweater brushed against your cheek as she gently tucked the damp strand of hair behind your ear. Her fingers lingered for just a fraction of a second against your skin, her thumb skimming your temple.
Your breath hitched. The entire universe seemed to shrink down to the few inches of space between your faces. You were trapped between her warmth and your desk, your heart hammering so loudly against your ribs you were certain she could hear it.
Alysa blinked, her gaze dropping to your lips for a split second before darting back to your eyes. For a terrifying, beautiful moment, the playful energy in the room completely vanished, replaced by a heavy, magnetic tension that made your knees feel weak.
"There," Alysa murmured, her voice suddenly much quieter, dropping her hand back to her side. She cleared her throat, a faint pink flush spreading across her cheeks that had nothing to do with the cold. "Can't have the literature queen getting ink or rain in her eyes."
She gave you a small, unusually shy smile before spinning around and walking back to her desk, burying her face back into her psychology textbook.
You stood frozen by your desk for a long time, your hand slowly rising to touch the spot on your ear where her fingers had just been. You looked across the room at her, wrapped tightly in your clothes, pretending to study.
You realized, with a wave of absolute helplessness, that your diary entry from Halloween had been a lie. You hadn't cut off your feelings at all. And looking at the slight blush still lingering on Alysa's neck, you started to wonder, for the very first time, if you were actually as alone in those feelings as you thought.
♡
December 18th
The room feels entirely too big today. The walls are bare, the fairy lights are turned off, and the silence is deafening. Alysa left for for her drive back to Oakland an hour ago, and I leave for the airport in twenty minutes. Winter break has officially started, and we’re going our separate ways for the next three weeks.
Fact #6: Alysa is a terrible secret keeper, but an incredible gift giver. We promised we wouldn't open our Christmas presents until December 25th, but the absolute agony of leaving them under each other’s pillows today was almost too much to bear. I’m writing this on my bed, staring at the neatly wrapped package she left for me, fighting every single urge to tear into it right now. I just hope she likes what I made her. I put a little too much of my heart into it, and now that we're miles apart, I'm terrified she'll read between the lines.
The night before, the dorm room had been a disaster zone of open suitcases, folded sweaters, and stray socks. Amidst the chaos, Alysa had suddenly dropped onto your mattress, clutching a wrapped box behind her back.
"Okay, ground rules," she had said, pointing a finger at you. "We exchange them now, but we do not open them until Christmas morning. We have to FaceTime each other while we do it. Deal?"
"Deal," you had smiled, reaching under your bed to pull out your gift for her.
Now, it was Christmas morning. The snow was falling softly outside your childhood bedroom window, but your phone was propped up on your desk, radiating warmth. On the screen, Alysa was sitting cross-legged on her bed at home, wearing matching flannel pajamas and looking incredibly eager.
"Okay, on the count of three, we open them together," Alysa cheered, her smiley piercing catching the glow of her own little Christmas tree in the background. "One... two... three!"
The screen filled with the sound of ripping paper. You carefully peeled back the festive foil wrapping Alysa had used, while on the other side, Alysa paused, looking down at the wrapping paper you had used. You had spent hours doodling tiny, custom illustrations all over the plain brown paper—little figure skates, tiny Lucky Charm marshmallows, and small sketches of Maki and Nobara.
"Oh my god," Alysa breathed, her fingers tracing the hand-drawn paper. "You doodled on the wrapping paper? Are you kidding me? I’m literally saving this forever."
As she carefully opened her box, you finally pulled off your wrapping to reveal a heavy, beautiful wooden case. Your breath caught. Inside was a massive, professional-grade set of art supplies—ranging from high-end blending pencils to vibrant pastels, along with three thick, premium mixed-media sketchbooks.
"Alysa..." you gasped, running your fingers over the smooth wood. "This is too much. These are the exact pastels I was looking at last month."
"Nothing is too much for the resident artist," Alysa beamed, but then she let out a loud gasp of her own. She had just pulled your gift out of the box.
Inside was the latest special-edition volume of Jujutsu Kaisen that she had been dying to add to her collection, but beneath it lay a thick, custom leather sketchbook. When Alysa opened the cover, her jaw completely dropped.
Over the course of the semester, you had meticulously filled the pages with stunning, highly detailed drawings of her favorite characters. There was a fierce, dynamic portrait of Maki holding her cursed tool, a gorgeous page of Nobara, and a soft, beautiful sketch of Shoko. Interspersed between the artwork, written in your neat, elegant cursive, were cute little random poems you had composed about the characters and subtly, about the beauty of passion and dedication.
"You drew these?" Alysa’s voice was suddenly very quiet, her eyes wide as she slowly flipped through the pages, her thumb lingering over a sketch of Maki. "For me? This must have taken you months."
"I just... I know how much you love them," you whispered, suddenly feeling incredibly vulnerable through the phone screen. "And there's a card, too."
Alysa picked up the beautiful, hand-painted Christmas card you had included. Inside, you had written a touching, sincere note about how terrifying college had seemed at first, and how her bright, chaotic, and kind presence had turned a scary transition into the best semester of your life. You wrote about how much her blooming friendship meant to you.
On your end, you opened Alysa’s card. It was exactly her style, the front featured a goofy, cartoonish drawing of a cat falling on ice, with a speech bubble that said, 'Hope your Christmas doesn't face-plant!' But when you read the inside, your chest tightened.
In her messy, hurried handwriting, Alysa had written:
To my favorite roomie/angel from the literature heavens, I honestly don't know how I survived before Room 314. Thank you for picking out my marshmallows, listening to me ramble about anime fight scenes, and coming to my freezing skating shows. You are the quiet to my loud, and you make me feel so safe. My family is probably sick of me talking about you already. I miss you like crazy. Let’s make next semester even better.
On the screen, Alysa looked up from your note. Her eyes were a little shiny, and a soft, incredibly tender smile was resting on her lips.
"I miss you," Alysa murmured, her usual high-energy facade melting into pure, raw sincerity. She held the sketchbook tightly against her chest, right over her heart. "This is the best gift I've ever gotten. Seriously."
"I miss you too, Alysa," you said softly, looking at her handwriting in your hands.
As you stared at her through the screen, thousands of miles apart, the fear of ruining your friendship suddenly didn't feel strong enough to crush the truth anymore. You were deeply in love with her, and reading her words, you realized that whatever was growing between you in Room 314 was too beautiful to ever be considered a mistake.
♡
January 12th
We have been back in Room 314 for less than twenty-four hours, and my carefully constructed emotional walls have already been completely demolished. I should have known better.
Fact #7: Alysa is an aggressive hugger, and she has zero concept of a winter-break withdrawal limit. I arrived at the dorm first, but the second she burst through that door, it was like the last three weeks of separation never happened. Before she even dropped her duffel bags, she lunged forward and tackled me onto my bed. But the thing that entirely broke me? She was wearing one of the hoodies I left behind—and she immediately admitted she made her dad buy my exact brand of lavender-vanilla detergent over break just so she wouldn't miss me so much.
Now, it’s our first official weekend back, and the temperature outside is sub-zero. To combat the freezing draft by the window, Alysa proposed a genius, entirely dangerous solution: we pushed our twin beds together into a giant mega-bed. And once again, I am completely helpless.
The harsh winter wind howled against the glass, but inside the combined fortress of your beds, it was warm and perfectly still. The space was lit entirely by the golden glow of your fairy lights, creating a cozy sanctuary against the January freeze.
Alysa was lying on her stomach next to you, her ankles kicked up in the air. She was wearing her matching flannel pajama pants, but on top, she was still securely swimming in your oversized charcoal sweater. Propped up in front of her was the special-edition volume of Jujutsu Kaisen you had given her for Christmas.
"Okay, wait, you have to hear how Nobara says this line," Alysa insisted, tapping the page enthusiastically. She cleared her throat, dramatically altering her voice to sound as fiercely confident as possible. "'I bet you guys like it when girls play dumb, huh? Well, too bad!' God, I love her. She is such a queen."
You let out a soft, genuine laugh, shifting your weight. You were sitting propped up against a mountain of pillows, using one of the thick new sketchbooks Alysa had bought you, along with a set of her professional graphite pencils. "You're acting out the dialogue now?"
"Obviously. A masterpiece requires a vocal performance," Alysa grinned, spinning around on the mattress. Without a single shred of hesitation, she slid closer and rested her head right in your lap, using your thigh as a pillow. She flipped the page of her manga, completely unbothered by the sudden shift in proximity. "Do you mind? My neck was getting stiff."
Your breath hitched sharply, your pencil freezing mid-stroke above the paper. The familiar, dizzying warmth of her flooded your senses—the scent of your own laundry detergent mixed with her signature vanilla. Through the thin fabric of your pajamas, the weight of her head on your lap felt incredibly heavy and incredibly right.
"I—no, it's fine," you managed to murmur, your voice a little tighter than you intended.
"Cool," Alysa mumbled, already deep back into her reading, her thumb tracing the edge of the page.
You forced your racing heart to slow down, taking a deep, steadying breath. You looked down at her. From this angle, her blonde and brown striped hair fell loosely around her face, a few strands catching the amber light. Her reading glasses were perched slightly low on her nose, and her silver smiley piercing peeked out as she chewed softly on her bottom lip in concentration.
She was beautiful.
Slowly, almost automatically, your hand moved back to the paper. Instead of drawing the anime characters you had been sketching earlier, your pencil began to trace the soft slope of Alysa’s jawline. You captured the curve of her nose, the long sweep of her eyelashes behind her lenses, and the oversized collar of your sweater bunched around her neck. You worked in absolute, comfortable silence, the only sound in the room being the heavy wind outside and the soft scratch of your graphite on paper.
Twenty minutes passed before Alysa let out a long sigh, closing the manga with a soft snap. "Man, the pacing in this arc is just incredible—"
She paused, tilting her head back to look up at you from your lap. Her sudden movement caught you completely off guard, and you didn't have time to cover the page. Alysa’s eyes darted from your face down to the sketchbook.
Her breath caught.
The playful, high-energy comment she was about to make completely died on her lips. She stared at the portrait you had just drawn, a perfectly captured, incredibly tender rendition of her, looking soft and at peace in your lap. It wasn't just a casual sketch; it was drawn with the kind of meticulous, adoring detail that only someone who had spent months carefully observing her could achieve.
Alysa slowly reached up, her fingers gently brushing the edge of the sketchbook page. "Is that... me?"
"Yeah," you whispered, your heart doing a violent, terrifying thud against your ribs. Panic flared in your chest. You felt completely exposed, your deepest secret laid bare on the paper between you. "I just... you looked peaceful. I was practicing shading."
Alysa didn't move. She didn't laugh, she didn't jump up, and she didn't break the tension with a joke. Instead, she slowly looked up from the drawing, her bright eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that made the air in the room feel thick.
She shifted slightly, turning her body so she was leaning up on one elbow, bringing her face inches from yours. The soft wool of your sweater brushed against your knee. For a terrifying, beautiful moment, the playful energy in the room completely vanished. Her gaze dropped to your lips for a lingering, heavy heartbeat before rising back to meet your eyes. There was a quiet, unreadable question in her expression that made your throat go completely dry.
You held your breath, every cell in your body screaming at you to lean forward, to drop the pencil, to tell her everything. But the fear of losing this—of ruining the safe haven you had built in Room 314—wrapped itself tightly around your throat. You forced yourself to maintain a calm exterior, clamping down on the feelings that were threatening to overflow.
Alysa blinked, as if suddenly snapping out of a trance. She cleared her throat, a faint pink flush spreading across her cheeks as she pulled back just a fraction, breaking the magnetic pull between you.
"Wow," Alysa murmured, her voice a little softer than usual, a tiny, slightly shy smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. "You're, like, really talented roomie. You made me look way cooler than I actually am."
"You look exactly like yourself," you said softly, your heart still hammering violently against your ribs as you gently closed the sketchbook.
"Well, I love it," she said, her high-energy persona slowly clicking back into place as she stretched her arms over her head. "But now I'm starving. Mega-bed snack run?"
"Always," you laughed, the tension deflating into familiar comfort. As Alysa scrambled off the bed to look for a bag of Lucky Charms, you let out a long, silent breath. The feelings were still hidden, safely locked away behind a wall of friendship but as you watched her walk around in your clothes, you wondered how much longer that wall could possibly stand.
♡
February 14th
Today, the entire campus was an insufferable sea of red roses, cheap teddy bears, and couples holding hands on the quad. I spent my afternoon hiding in the library, trying to drown out my own loud, aching loneliness in a pile of romantic poetry. It’s a cruel irony, being a literature major who loves the concept of love, while being desperately, silently pining for her own roommate.
Fact #8: Alysa doesn't care about standard romance, but she absolutely loves a theme. I came back to the dorm expecting a quiet evening, but instead, Room 314 had been entirely transformed. She declared tonight a mandatory 'Galentine's Day' sanctuary. She bought a mountain of discount heart-shaped chocolates, a pink Jujutsu Kaisen blanket she found online, and completely banned any moping. I tried to keep my distance, to play the role of the platonic best friend, but Alysa has a way of shattering my defenses without even trying.
"No, seriously, look at the packaging," Alysa laughed, tossing a box of chocolate-covered strawberries onto the mega-bed. She was wearing her oversized "Rad Dad" tee, her striped hair falling loosely out of a messy bun. "It literally says 'For Your Sweetheart.' I told the cashier it was for my incredibly cultured, beautiful roommate, and I think he thought we were married."
You let out a soft laugh, sitting cross-legged under the pink anime blanket she had draped over you. "You didn't."
"I absolutely did," Alysa grinned, plopping down next to you. She popped a strawberry into her mouth, her silver smiley piercing catching the warm amber glow of your fairy lights. "Why should all the couples have fun today? We are the ultimate dynamic duo. We don't need dates."
"Yeah," you murmured softly, looking down at the chocolate in your hands. "We don't."
Your chest tightened with a familiar, dull ache. You were incredibly grateful for her, but sitting this close, watching the light dance across her face, made the secret under your pillow feel heavier than ever. You wanted to be her sweetheart. You wanted the cashier to be right.
Suddenly, a cheesy, slow pop song started playing from Alysa’s phone on the desk. She paused, her eyes lighting up as a mischievous grin spread across her face.
"Oh, absolutely not. This is our moment," Alysa declared, scrambling off the bed. She extended a hand toward you, bowing dramatically. "May I have this dance, roomie?"
You blinked, a flush instantly creeping up your neck. "Alysa, no. I don't dance."
"Come on! It’s Galentine's Day! It’s tradition...well, it is now," she insisted, grabbing your hands and gently tugging you off the mattress. You couldn't resist the infectious, bright energy radiating off her.
Before you could protest further, Alysa stepped into your space. She didn't leave a polite, friendly gap. Instead, she wrapped both of her arms securely around your waist, pulling you close against her. Your breath hitched sharply, your hands instinctively rising to rest flat against her shoulders.
"See? Easy," Alysa whispered, her voice suddenly dropping its loud, theatrical edge. She began to sway slowly, dragging you along with her to the rhythm of the music.
The room was completely quiet save for the song filtering through her phone speakers. The proximity was overwhelming. You could feel the steady rise and fall of her chest against yours, could smell the distinct lavender-vanilla scent of your own laundry soap clinging to her. Every single self-preservation rule you had written in your diary vanished into thin air.
Alysa tilted her head down, her bright eyes locking onto yours. Up close, the teasing look in her eyes had completely melted away, replaced by a soft, intense gaze that made your knees feel weak. She tightened her grip on your waist, pulling you just a fraction closer, until your shoulders were brushed against her.
"You're really quiet tonight," Alysa murmured softly, her eyes tracing your face.
"I'm just... thinking," you whispered, your voice trembling slightly. Your heart was hammering so wildly against your ribs you were certain she could feel it through her t-shirt. You were holding your breath, your fingers subconsciously tightening on the fabric of her shoulders.
"About what?" she asked, her gaze dropping down to your lips for a lingering, heavy heartbeat before rising back to meet your eyes. There was a quiet, unreadable question in her expression, a vulnerability that mirrored the look from the night you drew her.
You swallowed hard, the urge to just lean forward and close the tiny space between you becoming almost unbearable. You wanted to tell her. You wanted to break the rules.
But the terrifying fear of losing this, of making things awkward in the one place you felt safe, wrapped itself tightly around your throat. With a massive effort of resolve, you forced a soft, breathless smile and gently rested your forehead against her shoulder, hiding your face from her intense gaze.
"Just thinking about how much I hate this song," you lied softly into the fabric of her shirt.
Alysa let out a soft, low chuckle, her chin resting gently against the top of your head as she kept swaying you in the dim light. "Liars don't get the last marshmallow, roomie."
She didn't push you away, and she didn't let go of your waist. You stayed wrapped in her arms for the rest of the song, your eyes closed, fighting back the tears of how desperately you loved her. The walls were still up, but as you danced in the quiet of Room 314, you knew they were cracking, and Valentine's Day had never felt so beautifully painful.
♡
March 4th
I have officially lost my only remaining sanctuary on this campus.
Fact #9: Alysa cannot handle the quiet section of the university library. She claims the complete silence makes her ears ring and her brain short-circuit. But with psychology midterms looming, she decided she couldn't be trusted to study alone in our room anymore. So, yesterday afternoon, she invaded my sacred, silent literature study nook in the basement of the old library building. It’s the one place I go to clear my head and get away from my thoughts of her...and she completely took it over with her neon highlighters, massive textbooks, and endless frantic energy.
The library basement smelled beautifully of old paper, dust, and polished wood. Usually, the only sound in your favorite corner nook was the soft turning of pages.
Today, it was the aggressive click-click-click of Alysa pen-tapping against a heavy psychology binder.
You stared down at your essay on Victorian poetry, trying your absolute best to concentrate, but your eyes kept drifting across the small wooden table. Alysa was wearing your favorite oversized knitted cardigan again, the cuffs pushed up to her elbows. Her striped hair was held up by a chaotic mess of bobby pins, and she had her reading glasses perched crookedly on her nose. She looked completely stressed, chewing fiercely on her bottom lip as she stared at a diagram of the human brain.
You let out a tiny, silent huff of amusement, dipping your head back to your notebook.
Suddenly, a small, bright yellow square of paper slid into your field of vision, covering your paragraph on Alfred Tennyson.
You blinked and looked at it. It was a post-it note. In Alysa’s messy, hurried handwriting, she had drawn a tiny, remarkably accurate sketch of Gojo Satoru with his blindfold, with a speech bubble that read: 'Help me. The cerebral cortex is destroying my mapping skills. Break time?'
You bit your lip to hide a smile, grabbing your pen. You wrote back on the bottom of the note: 'No. You have to study. You promised.' and slid it back across the table.
Not even thirty seconds passed before another yellow sticky note slid over your notebook.
This one had a drawing of a tiny, crude figure skate face-planting onto the ice. Underneath, she wrote: 'If I fail this exam, Philip will make me do off-ice conditioning for a week. Do you want me to die? Is that what this is?'
You covered your mouth to muffle a soft laugh, the strict, silent rules of the library basement completely slipping your mind. You shook your head, refusing to answer this time, trying to look sternly focused on your poetry analysis.
A third sticky note immediately slid over, nudging against your knuckles.
You looked down, expecting another joke. Instead, your heart gave a sudden, violent thud against your ribs.
On this note, Alysa hadn't drawn any anime characters or dramatic stick figures. She had written a single, neat sentence in the center of the square:
'I can't concentrate because you look really pretty under these stupid fluorescent library lights. Stop being distracting.'
Your breath caught completely in your throat. The tip of your pen hovered uselessly over your paper as a sudden, intense wave of heat rushed to your face. You slowly lifted your eyes from the note, your heart hammering wildly against your chest.
Alysa wasn't looking at her textbook anymore. She was resting her chin in her hands, her reading glasses slipping slightly down her nose, watching you closely. The playful, chaotic energy she usually radiated had completely vanished. Her bright eyes were fixed on yours, soft and intensely focused, a faint, unusually vulnerable flush spreading across her cheeks.
The silence of the library basement, which had always felt comforting to you, suddenly felt heavy and suffocating. You were trapped in her gaze, the space between you across the small wooden desk feeling entirely too small. She was looking at you with the exact same unreadable, magnetic intensity from Valentine's Day—but this time, she had put the words in writing.
You swallowed hard, your fingers trembling slightly as you gripped your pen. You wanted to write something brave. You wanted to slide a note back that confessed every single diary entry you had written over the last six months.
Instead, Alysa reached out, her fingers gently tapping the edge of your notebook to get your attention. She leaned over the small table, her face inches from yours, and whispered under her breath, her silver smiley piercing catching the dim light.
"I'm serious, roomie," she murmured, her voice a low, raspy velvet trail in the quiet room. "Pack up your books. Let’s get out of here."
You looked from the tiny yellow note back to her hopeful, intense eyes. You had three more pages of your essay to finish, but looking at her, you realized the library was no longer your sanctuary. She was.
"Okay," you whispered back softly, your voice shaking.
As you both silently began packing your bags, your fingers brushed against hers as you reached for the shared pencil case. A jolt of pure electricity shot up your arm, and as you sneaked a glance at Alysa, you noticed she quickly looked away, a deep blush creeping all the way to the tips of her ears.
You shoved the sticky notes into your pocket, right against your heart. The walls weren't just cracking anymore—they were actively crumbling, and as you followed her out into the crisp March air, you knew you were running out of time to keep your secret hidden.
♡
March 20th
The ultimate test of my resolve has officially arrived, and I am entirely unprepared.
Fact #10: Alysa absolutely hates being away from her favorite person. With Spring Break starting next week and the dorms closing down, she spent the last three days pacing our room, aggressively lamenting the fact that we’d be separated for nine whole days. I thought she’d just throw another dramatic tantrum like she did before winter break. Instead, last night, she casually tossed a folded-up itinerary onto my lap and asked me to come home with her.
Going to her hometown means stepping entirely out of the safe bubble of Room 314. It means seeing her world, her childhood bedroom, and the person she is outside of campus. I know it’s a massive risk for the secret I’ve been guarding all year, but when she looked at me with those wide, hopeful eyes... I couldn't say no.
The hum of the packing tape was the loudest sound in the room as you sealed your small duffel bag. The campus was already emptying out, the usual afternoon chatter in the hallways replaced by the rolling clatter of suitcases.
"Okay, so I talked to my dad," Alysa announced, bursting through the bathroom door. She was wearing her oversized "Rad Dad" tee, her striped hair half-up in a messy clip, and she was carrying a stack of freshly washed laundry—mostly your hoodies. "He said he’s making his famous homemade noodles the night we get in. And he already asked if you like Chinese food, to which I replied, 'Duh, she’s a person of culture.'"
You smiled softly, pulling the zipper closed on your bag. "You really didn't have to invite me, Alysa. Your family probably wants some quality time with you."
Alysa stopped, dropping the laundry onto her bed. She turned around, her playful energy instantly dialing back into something incredibly sincere. She crossed the room, completely ignoring the space between you as she always did, and stood right in front of you.
"Are you kidding?" Alysa said softly, her bright eyes locking onto yours. "I wanted to invite you. Spring break without my roommate sounded completely miserable. Plus, I’ve been talking their ears off about you since September. It’s about time they actually meet the legend."
Your heart gave a violent, familiar thud against your ribs. "A legend? Is that what I am?"
"Obviously," Alysa teased, a small grin tugging at her lips, her silver smiley piercing catching the afternoon light. But then, her expression softened, her gaze dropping to your hands before rising back to your eyes. "Seriously, though. I'm really glad you're coming."
The magnetic pull between you, the same intense weight that had been building since Valentine's Day and the library basement, suddenly filled the space between you. You stood there, inches apart, the quiet of the packing-day dorm room wrapping around you both. You could smell her faint vanilla scent, and your eyes briefly darted down to her lips before you forced yourself to look back up.
The fear of making things complicated hit you, but looking at her hopeful face, the reality of the situation was becoming impossible to deny. You weren't just roommates anymore. You were stepping into each other's lives.
"I'm glad too," you whispered softly.
Alysa beamed, the heavy tension breaking into a bright, radiant smile as she suddenly reached out and grabbed your hand, her warm fingers squeezing yours tightly. "Awesome. Now help me pack my Jujutsu Kaisen volumes, because there is no way I'm surviving nine days without Maki Zen'in."
You laughed, letting her pull you over to her side of the room, your fingers still tingling from the warmth of her touch. As you reached into your pocket, your thumb brushed against the yellow library sticky note you still carried with you. You knew that going to her home was going to make hiding your feelings nearly impossible but as you looked at Alysa laughing while trying to jam a manga into an overstuffed suitcase, you realized you were finally ready to stop running.
♡
March 24th
I used to think our dorm room was a whirlwind, but it turns out Room 314 was just a gentle breeze compared to the category-five hurricane that is Alysa’s childhood home.
Fact #11: The Liu household is a beautifully chaotic psychological study, run by a wonderfully warm dad and four teenagers who are practically the same age. Her brother and three sisters are a tight-knit pack of pure, loud energy. Alysa tries so hard to be the responsible, protective oldest sibling, but trying to herd four high-energy teens is a monumental task. This morning, when the chaos reached a boiling point, I finally stepped out of my quiet shell to help. And the way Alysa looked at me afterward... I think it changed everything.
The morning sun had barely cleared the trees when the Liu house erupted into absolute pandemonium.
You stood at the bottom of the stairs, holding a mug of coffee Alysa’s dad had kindly pressed into your hands before he vanished into the garage to look for a missing toolbox. Upstairs, bedroom doors were slamming. In the kitchen, the toaster was smoking, and in the living room, a full-blown debate was taking place.
"I'm telling you, you wore it on Friday!" one of the sisters shouted from the hallway.
"I didn't! It’s literally in your closet right now!" the second sister fired back.
Meanwhile, their brother was frantically throwing couch cushions into the air. "Has anyone seen my car keys?! I'm going to be late for work!"
Alysa stood in the center of the kitchen, looking completely overwhelmed. Her striped hair was tied up in a messy ponytail, and she was wearing a mismatched pajama set. "Guys, quiet down! Philip is calling me in ten minutes and I can't find my training journal! Justin, check the kitchen counter! Jaylin, stop yelling at Julia!"
Nobody was listening. The teenage energy was completely deafening.
You set your coffee mug down on the counter, taking a deep breath. Your literature-major brain, usually reserved for quiet analysis, suddenly kicked into high gear. You walked over to the brother, Justin, who was about to flip the armchair.
"Justin," you said, your voice calm, steady, and entirely unfazed. He stopped, blinking down at you. "You had your keys in your hand when we walked in last night because you checked the mail. Did you leave them on the console by the front door?"
Justin blinked, ran a hand through his hair, and dashed to the entryway. "Found them! You're a lifesaver!" he yelled, sprinting out the door.
Next, you turned to the kitchen counter, immediately spotting a familiar black notebook wedged between a stack of cookbooks. You picked it up and handed it to Alysa. "Your training journal."
Alysa gasped, clutching it to her chest like a lifeline. "Oh my god."
Before she could say anything else, Selina came running down the stairs, looking stressed. You smoothly intercepted the bickering sisters, using your quiet, patient energy to help them track down the missing top (which was, ironically, in the laundry room). Within five minutes, the shouting stopped, the toaster was unplugged, and a wave of peaceful, organized calm settled over the house.
Alysa stood frozen by the kitchen island, completely speechless. The frantic, stressed older-sister facade had entirely melted away. She was just staring at you, her bright eyes wide and soft, a look of pure, unadulterated adoration radiating from her face. Her silver smiley piercing caught the morning light as her mouth parted slightly.
"What?" you asked softly, feeling a sudden, nervous blush creeping up your neck under her intense gaze. "Is my hair messy?"
Before Alysa could answer, Jaylin, one of the sisters, leaned against the kitchen doorway, crossing her arms with a massive, knowing smirk.
"Don't bother asking her, roomie," Jaylin teased loudly, glancing between the two of you. "Alysa has officially lost her mind. Look at her. She’s literally looking at you like you just invented the wheel."
"Shut up, Jaylin!" Alysa snapped instantly, her entire face bursting into a deep, furious crimson flush. She aggressively shoved her training journal into her backpack, desperately trying to hide her face, but the blush had already traveled all the way to the tips of her ears.
"I'm just saying," Jaylin giggled, grabbing an apple from the counter and walking away. "Dad! Alysa’s roommate is a wizard! She cured the house!"
The kitchen fell into a sudden, thick silence. You stood by the counter, your heart doing a violent, dizzying flip against your ribs. You looked back at Alysa. She was still fiercely avoiding eye contact, nervously adjusting the strap of her bag, the bright pink blush still warm on her cheeks.
She wasn't looking at you like a regular roommate. Her sister knew it, you knew it, and in the quiet aftermath of the morning chaos, the truth was suddenly louder than the house had ever been.
♡
March 27th
I am writing this from the floor of her childhood bedroom while she’s in the bathroom, and my hands are shaking so badly I can barely hold my pen. It happened. The wall didn't just crumble...I smashed through it myself.
Fact #12: Alysa’s childhood friends don't do casual nights out. Tonight we were supposed to meet up with a few of her old skating and hometown friends at a local spot, which meant dressing up. I thought the biggest challenge of the evening would be surviving the loud crowd. I was wrong. The real danger was a single bottle of liquid eyeliner and a total lapse in my own self-control.
The bedroom was filled with the upbeat hum of a pop playlist, clothes strewn across Alysa’s bed as the two of you rushed to get ready. You were already dressed, adjusting the waistband of your favorite top and low-rise jeans.
"Hey, can you help me with this? I’m going to poke my eye out," Alysa groaned, spinning around in her desk chair. She was holding a felt-tip liquid eyeliner tube, looking completely defeated. Her blonde and brown striped hair was perfectly curled, and she looked beautiful, but her winged liner was hopelessly uneven.
"Come here," you smiled, completely running on instinct.
Without a single second thought, driven by the effortless, comfortable domesticity you’d shared all year in Room 314, you stepped forward. You didn't just lean over her. Instead, you casually parted your legs and straddled her lap, settling yourself onto her thighs so you could get the perfect angle to fix her makeup.
Alysa’s breath hitched instantly.
The air in the room shifted, turning thick and heavy in an instant. You tried to focus, leaning in close until your faces were barely inches apart. You gently placed one hand on her jaw to steady her, your thumb resting right near her silver smiley piercing, while your other hand carefully traced a sharp black wing across her eyelid.
"Don't blink," you whispered, your own heart starting to pick up a frantic, heavy rhythm against your ribs as you realized just how intimate this position actually was. You could feel the heat radiating off her skin.
You capped the eyeliner, quickly grabbing her mascara to add a few soft swipes to her lashes. "And... there you go. Eyes are complete."
You set the makeup down on the desk, finally letting your focus drift from her eyelashes to the rest of her body. That’s when the breath completely died in your throat.
Alysa wasn't looking at the makeup. Her hands, which had quietly found a home at your sides, were firmly gripping your hips. Her thumbs were resting directly on the bare, exposed skin of your waist, just above the denim of your jeans. She wasn't just holding you; she was slowly, gently caressing the soft skin there, her touch incredibly warm and possessive.
You looked down, trapped entirely in her gaze. Alysa was staring up at you, completely lost, her bright eyes wide and dark with a raw, undeniable hunger. The unreadable question she had been asking all winter was gone, replaced by a silent, screaming certainty.
The silence between you was deafening. Every diary entry, every mantra of 'just friends,' and every ounce of fear you had carried since Halloween withered and died under her gaze. You didn't want to hide anymore. You didn't want to write it down in a journal.
You didn't use words.
Leaning down those final, agonizing few inches, you closed the space between your lips.
Alysa let out a soft, sharp gasp against your mouth, and the very next second, her grip on your hips tightened fiercely. She pulled you flush against her chest, tilting her head back to kiss you back with a desperate, overwhelming intensity that made your head spin. Her lips were warm, parting slightly as she poured months of hidden pining into the kiss, her fingers digging into your waist. It was chaotic, beautiful, and everything you had ever dreamed of in the quiet dark of Room 314.
Click.
The bedroom door swung open. "Hey, Alysa, Dad wants to know if—"
You both practically shot apart, your hearts hammering violently as you scrambled off her lap, clearing your throat and pretending to reach for a hairbrush on the desk.
Julia, one of her sisters, froze in the doorway. Her eyes darted from your flushed face and smeared lip gloss to Alysa, who was sitting frozen in her chair, breathing heavily with her face completely crimson.
A slow, massive, mischievous smirk spread across Julia's face.
"Oh," Julia giggled, backing out of the room slowly and raising her hands in retreat. "My bad. Didn't realize 'roomie prep' was so intense. I'll tell Dad you'll be down in five."
The door clicked shut, leaving the room in a stunned, breathless silence. You stood by the desk, your hand slowly rising to touch your tingling lips, terrified to look at her. But when you finally glanced over, Alysa was looking up at you, a breathless, utterly captivated smile breaking across her face.
♡
April 6th
I am hopelessly in love with Alysa Liu. (˶>⩊<˶) ♡
The dynamic of Room 314 had entirely shifted since our return to UCLA.
When you pushed the door open now, it no longer looked like two separate lives crammed into a generic dorm space. The twin beds remained permanently pushed together, transformed into a massive, central island of fluffy blankets, pillows, and shared laundry. Your hand-painted sketches and her vibrant anime posters now intermingled seamlessly across the walls. It was a cohesive, warm sanctuary. It was, undeniably, them.
You were sitting cross-legged on the floor, surrounded by tubes of acrylics and mixing palettes, putting the final, delicate touches of light onto a canvas. The soft April breeze drifted through the cracked window, carrying the faint scent of blossoming trees from the quad.
The door handle jiggled, and the familiar, comforting whirlwind entered the room.
"Hello, my beautiful artist," Alysa said, her voice dropping the performative "roomie" title without a second thought.
She dropped her heavy training bag by the desk and immediately walked over to where you were sitting. She was wearing one of your soft, oversized knitted cardigans over her skating gear, her striped hair falling out of a messy claw clip. Her silver smiley piercing caught the golden afternoon light as a radiant, effortless smile broke across her face.
You looked up from your canvas, your heart doing that familiar, dizzying flip against your ribs...only this time, there was no panic following it. "Hey. How was practice?"
"Freezing. Exhausting. But infinitely better now that I'm back here," Alysa murmured.
Instead of heading to her own side of the room, she dropped down onto the floor right behind you. Without a single word of hesitation, she slid her legs around your waist, pulling your back flush against her chest. She wrapped her warm arms securely around your shoulders, resting her chin gently on your collarbone to look at the wet paint.
You leaned back into her touch, letting out a long, peaceful breath. Her fingers began to gently trace soft, absentminded patterns against the bare skin of your forearm, her vanilla perfume completely wrapping around you.
"Wow," Alysa whispered, her breath warm against your neck as she stared at the canvas. "That's gorgeous. You're so talented."
"It's not finished yet," you murmured, tilting your head back slightly.
That brought your face mere inches from hers. Alysa’s eyes darted down to your lips, a soft, familiar heat coloring her cheeks. She didn't pull back, and she didn't make a joke to break the tension. Instead, she leaned forward those final few centimeters, pressing a sweet, lingering kiss to the corner of your mouth before resting her temple against yours.
"Take your time," Alysa whispered, tightening her arms around you, holding you close in the quiet center of your shared world. "I'm not going anywhere."
You dipped your brush back into the paint, a quiet, soaring certainty settling deep into your chest. The diary entries were no longer a record of fear or hidden boundaries. They were just the beginning.
♡
May 2nd
The tables have completely turned in Room 314.
Fact #13: Alysa is surprisingly, incredibly good at handling my anxiety. I am currently deep in the trenches of my final literature thesis portfolio, and last night, I reached my absolute breaking point. I was drowning in a sea of revisions, surrounded by reference books on the mega-bed, and completely paralyzed by stress. Usually, I'm the one organizing the chaos, but when I crashed, Alysa took full control. She became my absolute anchor, and she didn't let go until the storm passed.
It was 2:00 AM, and the blinking cursor on your laptop screen was starting to feel like a personal insult. Your eyes burned, your shoulders were locked in tight knots, and a heavy, suffocating weight was pressing down on your chest. You stared at the half-finished paragraph on Emily Dickinson, a sudden, sharp tear of frustration slipping down your cheek.
"Hey," a soft, firm voice murmured.
Before you could blink the tears away, a warm hand reached over and gently closed your laptop screen, cutting off the harsh blue light.
Alysa was kneeling on the mattress beside you. She had discarded her skating gear hours ago, now wearing her favorite "Rad Dad" tee, her striped hair tied up in a messy bun. Her silver smiley piercing caught the dim, amber glow of the fairy lights as she looked at you with pure, unyielding concern.
"Books away. Laptop away. End of discussion," Alysa ordered gently, smoothly sliding your heavy binders off the bed and onto the floor.
"Alysa, I can't," you whispered, your voice shaking as a wave of panic threatened to take over. "It's due in forty-eight hours and my structural pacing is completely ruined—"
"Shh," Alysa interrupted softly. She reached out, her fingers lacing through yours, her warm thumbs tracing the back of your hands until your grip relaxed. "You've been staring at the same page for three hours. Your brain is fried, roomie. Trust me."
She scrambled off the bed for a moment, rummaging through the desk drawer. When she came back, she was holding the professional case of pastels she had bought you for Christmas, along with a scrap piece of drawing paper.
"Watch and learn," Alysa grinned, trying to lighten the heavy air in the room.
She sat cross-legged in front of you and began furiously rubbing the vibrant chalks against the paper. She was pressing too hard, breaking the tips of the pastels, and completely disregarding any proper blending techniques. You watched her, momentarily distracted from your anxiety by her sheer lack of artistic ability.
"And... finished. A true masterpiece," Alysa declared, proudly spinning the paper around to face you.
You blinked, and then a sudden, breathless laugh escaped your lips. It was a loud, terrible, completely distorted caricature of your notoriously strict, unsmiling Victorian Poetry professor. She had drawn him with an impossibly massive scowl, tiny cartoon wings, and a speech bubble that read: 'Everything must rhyme or you go to literature jail!'
"See? I knew I could get a laugh out of you," Alysa beamed, her eyes sparkling as she tossed the drawing aside.
She slid closer, wrapping her arms completely around your waist and pulling you down onto the mountain of pillows. You didn't fight it this time. You let your heavy head rest against her shoulder, burying your face into the soft fabric of her shirt, inhaling the comforting, familiar scent of lavender-vanilla.
Alysa pulled the pink anime blanket up over both of your shoulders, tucking you in securely against her chest. One of her hands found its way into your hair, her fingers gently and rhythmically massaging your scalp, soothing the lingering tension of the headache behind your eyes.
"You're going to pass, you know," Alysa whispered into the quiet dark of the room, her voice steady and warm. "You're the smartest, most talented person on this entire campus. I see how hard you work every single day. Tomorrow morning, we’ll get coffee, and you'll finish it. But right now, you need to sleep."
You closed your eyes, the tight knot of anxiety in your chest completely unraveling under the steady rise and fall of her breathing. You wrapped your arm securely around her waist, holding her close, feeling entirely safe in the sanctuary you had built together.
"Thank you, Alysa," you murmured sleepily, your voice trailing off.
"Always," she whispered back, pressing a soft, lingering kiss to the top of your head.
As darkness finally took over, you realized that the rules you used to protect yourself didn't matter anymore. The mega-bed wasn't just a shield against the winter draft; it was the place where you were loved, fully and completely, through every beautiful piece of writing and every chaotic breakdown.
♡
May 14th
Classes are finally over, and the looming finals are lingering in my head.
Fact #14: The ice is the only place Alysa truly relaxes when her brain is overloaded. After a grueling, back-to-back schedule of final papers and looming psychology exams, we were both completely drained. At midnight, when the rest of the campus was asleep or cramming, Alysa used her athlete's key privilege to sneak us into the university ice rink. Out there, in the quiet dark, the stress of the semester completely melted away.
The indoor rink was cavernous at midnight, the ambient safety lights casting a dim, moody blue glow across the pristine sheet of ice. The crisp, cold air hit your face the moment you stepped past the plexiglass barrier, a sharp and welcome contrast to the stifling heat of the library cubicles you had been trapped in all week.
Alysa wasn't dressed in her usual training gear. She was wearing casual Nike sweatpants, her skates, and an oversized hoodie. Her striped hair was down, falling softly around her face as she glided effortlessly toward the gate where you stood.
"Come on," Alysa murmured, extending a hand to you. Her silver smiley piercing caught the faint blue light as she gave you a reassuring, soft smile. "Semester's almost over. Time to let it go for a little."
You hesitated, stepping cautiously onto the slick surface. You were never particularly stable on skates, your ankles immediately feeling wobbly. "Alysa, if I fall and break my drawing hand, my summer plans are ruined."
"You won't fall. I’ve got you," she promised.
True to her word, Alysa smoothly closed the distance between you. Instead of just holding your hand, she stepped right into your space, lacing her fingers with yours and pulling you flush against her chest. She wrapped her arm securely around your waist, anchoring you completely to her steady, athletic frame.
Slowly, effortlessly, Alysa began to skate backward. She guided you along with her, pulling you through the dark, empty rink in long, elegant arcs. The only sound in the entire stadium was the rhythmic, crisp slice of her blades cutting through the ice.
You leaned into her, your hands resting flat against her shoulders. The biting chill of the arena didn't matter anymore; the space between you was radiating warmth, filled with the familiar, grounding scent of your lavender-vanilla detergent.
Alysa looked down at you, her bright eyes incredibly soft behind her reading glasses. The fierce, high-energy competitor the world saw on television was completely absent. In this quiet, private sanctuary, she was just yours.
"Better?" she whispered, slowing her pace until you both came to a gentle, drifting halt in the exact center of the ice.
"Much better," you breathed, a genuine smile finally breaking across your face as the lingering tension in your shoulders evaporated.
Alysa didn't say anything else. She simply tightened her grip on your waist, her gaze dropping to your lips for a heavy, silent heartbeat before rising back to your eyes. Under the soft blue shadow of the rafters, she leaned in and kissed you—a slow, deep, completely unhurried kiss that tasted like relief and new beginnings.
You kissed her back, your fingers tangling into the soft fabric of the hoodie she wore, anchoring yourself to her. The chaotic journey of Room 314, from the nervous boundaries of October to the agonizing pining of Valentine's Day, had finally brought you here, to the quiet center of her world.
When she finally pulled back, her forehead rested gently against yours, her breath puffing into tiny white clouds in the cold air.
"We made it," Alysa whispered, a breathless, happy smile gracing her lips.
"We did," you replied softly.
As she began to skate you slowly back toward the gate, you knew the dorm room would be packed into boxes by next week. The mega-bed would be disassembled, and Room 314 would belong to someone else. But as you looked at Alysa, you knew that the home you had built together wasn't tied to a room number anymore. It was wherever she was.
♡
June 11th
The textbooks are finally closed. The final exam has been turned in, and the absolute exhaustion of finals week has been replaced by a strange, bittersweet ache.
Fact #14: Shoving your entire life into cardboard boxes makes the passing of time entirely too real. Room 314 is halfway disassembled. The fairy lights are packed away, the posters are rolled up, and the walls look just as bare and clinical as they did when I first walked in here last September. But as I look at the space, I realize we aren't the same people who moved in. We built a whole world in this tiny square foot of campus, and tonight is our very last night inside of it.
The floor of the dorm room was a chaotic obstacle course of taped-up boxes, plastic storage bins, and stacks of suitcases. The mega-bed was still intact, left together for one final night, but without the sheets and blankets, the bare mattresses looked almost foreign.
"Okay, I definitely ordered way too much food, but technically we have to celebrate surviving the academic apocalypse," Alysa announced, kicking the door shut with her heel. She was carrying two massive brown paper bags that smelled beautifully of greasy garlic fries and burgers.
She was wearing her oversized "Rad Dad" tee, her striped hair falling loosely out of a messy claw clip, looking tired but absolutely radiant.
"There is no such thing as too much celebration food," you smiled, clearing a small space on the floor between two boxes so she could set the bags down.
You both sat cross-legged on the hardwood, digging into the takeout container with a pair of plastic forks. The room was unusually quiet without the hum of the desk fans or the music you usually played, but the silence didn't feel heavy anymore. It felt comfortable. Complete.
"Can you believe that a year ago, I didn't even know you existed?" Alysa murmured softly, dipping a fry into ketchup. Her silver smiley piercing caught the faint streetlights filtering through the uncurtained window. "And now I literally can't imagine my life without you."
You felt a familiar, warm tug in your chest, looking around the empty room. "I remember being so terrified the day I moved in. You walked in with all your skating gear and your loud music, and I thought, 'Oh no, my roommate is going to hate me.'"
Alysa let out a loud, genuine laugh, leaning her head back against the edge of the mattress. "Hate you? I spent the first two weeks trying to figure out how to make you talk to me more because I thought you were the coolest, most mysterious girl I'd ever seen."
"You did not," you blushed, looking down at your food.
"I did!" Alysa insisted, her voice dropping into that soft, intense tone that always made your heart skip a beat. She set her food down and reached into the pocket of her flannel pajama pants. "In fact... I have proof of exactly when I knew I was completely goner."
You watched, curious, as she carefully unfolded a slightly crumpled, well-worn piece of paper.
Your breath caught sharply.
It was the original graphite sketch you had drawn of her months ago—the one from the freezing January night when she had fallen asleep in your lap. You had thought it was safely tucked away in your old sketchbook, but as you looked closer, you realized she must have asked to keep it, or quietly saved it from the recycling bin when you were cleaning out your desk. The edges were slightly softened from how many times she had clearly unfolded it just to look at it.
"You kept this?" you whispered, your fingers tracing the edge of the paper.
"Of course I kept it," Alysa said softly. She slid closer across the floor, completely erasing the distance between you, and reached out to gently cup your jaw with her warm hand. Her thumb stroked your cheekbone. "It’s my favorite thing I own. Because it’s the exact moment I realized you saw me. Really saw me."
You looked from the sketch up to her bright, beautiful eyes. The pining, the hidden diary entries, and the fear of the future completely dissolved, leaving nothing but the beautiful reality of what you had built together.
"I love you, Alysa," you confessed softly, the words tasting sweet and natural on your lips.
Alysa’s smile broke across her face, bright enough to light up the entire empty room. "I love you too, baby," she murmured, leaning in to press a slow, deep, lingering kiss to your lips.
As you held her close in the center of the half-packed dorm, you knew that locking the door to Room 314 tomorrow morning wouldn't be an ending. The boxes scattered around you didn't represent a closing chapter—they were just the things you were taking with you into the next one.
♡
June 12th
The walls are bare, the fairy lights are packed away in a cardboard box, and Room 314 looks exactly the way it did when I first walked in last September. It’s strange seeing it like this...stripped of our sketches, our books, and the chaotic pile of shared laundry.
Fact #14: Room 314 was never just a temporary college layout. It was the blueprint. I felt a sharp, heavy ache in my chest this morning looking at the two separate twin bed frames, feeling like an incredible chapter was ending. But Alysa, as always, was already ten steps ahead of my nostalgia. She didn't just pack up our first year; she quietly ensured that our next one belongs entirely to us.
The final roll of packing tape secure-snapped against the cardboard, the loud echo bouncing off the stark white walls. The space felt hollow without the golden glow that had defined your entire winter and spring. The two twin beds sat on opposite sides of the room again, looking cold and distant.
You stood by the window, looking out at the sunny UCLA quad where students were loading up cars and saying their goodbyes. A quiet, bittersweet weight settled over you. This was the room where you had hidden your poetry, where you had sketched her sleeping profile, and where you had finally stopped running from the truth.
"Hey," a soft voice broke through your thoughts.
You turned around. Alysa was sitting on her rolled-up mattress topper, her striped hair tied back in a loose ponytail. She was wearing the exact same oversized charcoal hoodie of yours she had stolen after winter break. Her silver smiley piercing caught the bright May sunlight as she watched you, instantly reading the heavy expression on your face.
"You're doing that thing where you get all deep in your head," Alysa murmured, standing up and crossing the bare linoleum floor.
She didn't stop until she was right in your space, lacing her fingers effortlessly through yours. The warmth of her touch immediately anchored you, just as it had during your thesis crisis a few weeks ago.
"I'm just going to miss it," you confessed softly, looking around the empty room. "Miss us here."
"Who said anything about missing it?" Alysa grinned, a brilliant, mischievous spark lighting up her bright eyes.
With her free hand, she reached into the front pocket of her hoodie and pulled out a folded piece of paper, holding it out to you like a prize.
You blinked, taking it and unfolding the pages. Your eyes scanned the top text: Residential Lease Agreement. As you scrolled down, you saw the address, a charming, small two-bedroom apartment just a few blocks off-campus and right at the bottom, printed in bold ink, were two names side-by-side.
Alysa Liu. [Y/N].
Your breath caught sharply in your throat, your head snapping up to look at her. "Alysa... you didn't."
"I totally did," Alysa beamed, her chest rising with immense pride. "I talked to the landlord weeks ago, right after we got back from spring break. I knew I couldn't go back to a regular, tiny dorm bed after the mega-bed layout. Plus, my dad already approved it...he literally said, 'Make sure [Y/N] signs it first so I know someone responsible lives there.'"
A breathless, joyful laugh escaped your lips, the heavy nostalgia instantly evaporating into pure, soaring excitement. "An actual apartment?"
"An actual apartment," Alysa echoed softly, her playful bravado melting into a gaze of pure, tender certainty. She stepped closer, wrapping her arms securely around your neck, pulling you flush against her. "No campus housing rules. No separate twin frames. Just a place that’s entirely ours."
You wrapped your arms tightly around her waist, burying your face in the crook of her neck, inhaling the sweet vanilla scent that had become your home over the last nine months. The future stretched out ahead of you, bright and beautifully unwritten.
Alysa tilted her head back, her fingers gently brushing a strand of hair from your face. Her eyes traced your features with that same meticulous, adoring detail you used to save for your sketchbooks.
"Ready to go, roomie?" she whispered, the old nickname now a sweet, intimate joke between you.
"Ready," you murmured against her lips.
You leaned in, closing the space between you for a deep, lingering kiss in the center of the empty room. It wasn't a hidden confession or a rushed moment before someone walked through the door. It was a promise.
As you broke the kiss, grabbed your final duffel bags, and locked the door of Room 314 for the very last time, you didn't feel the need to look back. Your favorite story wasn't staying behind in the dorms—she was walking right beside you, holding your hand, ready for the next page.
Operation: Ask Out Cute Fan - Alysa Liu x Female Reader
The first time Alysa Liu noticed you, she thought you were just coincidence.
The second time, she got curious.
By the fifth Stars on Ice show?
She had a full-blown crush.
“You’re staring again,” Amber Glenn whispered dramatically from beside her near the rink entrance.
Alysa immediately looked away from the front row like she’d been caught committing a crime.
“I’m literally not.”
Amber blinked slowly.
“Alysa. You know we can all SEE you, right?”
Unfortunately, Amber was correct.
Because every single performer on the Stars on Ice tour had noticed Alysa’s painfully obvious fixation on the same audience member showing up at nearly every stop.
You always sat close to the rink.
Usually front row.
Always cheering the loudest during Alysa’s performances.
And somehow, every single time Alysa skated near your section, you smiled at her like she personally hung the moon.
It was becoming a problem.
A devastating one.
“She’s here again,” Alysa whispered one afternoon while peeking through the curtains before the show.
Isabeau Levito looked over her shoulder.
“Oh my god, it IS the cute girl.”
Alysa covered her face immediately.
“Can you guys stop calling her that?”
“No,” Amber answered instantly.
The worst part was Alysa didn’t even know your name.
But she did know:
You always wore different handmade friendship bracelets to every show.
You laughed with your entire body.
You cried during emotional group finales.
And once during a meet-and-greet, you told Alysa—
“Your skating makes people feel safe.”
Alysa had nearly fallen over emotionally.
Now here she was three cities later still thinking about it.
Which was exactly why the entire Stars on Ice cast eventually decided enough was enough.
“You need to ask her out,” Amber announced during breakfast at the hotel.
Alysa nearly inhaled her orange juice.
“WHAT?”
“You’ve been pining for weeks,” Isabeau added.
“That’s not true.”
“Alysa,” Amber deadpanned. “You literally changed your warm-up route yesterday just to skate past her section twice.”
“…That sounds fake.”
“It happened,” Ilia Malinin confirmed while stealing hashbrowns off Alysa’s plate.
Alysa looked horrified.
“You guys discuss me?”
“Constantly,” Amber said.
By lunchtime, the entire tour had somehow become emotionally invested.
And unfortunately for Alysa, figure skaters were dramatic people with too much free time between rehearsals.
Which led to the creation of—
Operation: Ask Out Cute Fan.
“This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me,” Alysa muttered while watching the staff help rearrange part of backstage.
“No,” Amber corrected. “This is ROMANCE.”
The plan became absurdly elaborate almost immediately.
Flowers?
Yes.
Fairy lights?
Obviously.
Music?
Naturally.
Someone even found a giant hand-painted sign reading:
HI CUTE FAN ❤️
Alysa looked seconds away from passing out.
“You people are insane.”
“And yet,” Ilia said smugly, “you’re still participating.”
Unfortunately—
He was right.
Because despite all her complaining, Alysa was smiling nonstop the entire afternoon.
Nervous.
Excited.
Completely doomed.
By the time the evening show finally started, Alysa was emotionally spiraling.
“What if she says no?”
“She won’t,” Amber said confidently while adjusting her costume.
“What if she thinks I’m weird?”
“Alysa,” Isabeau interrupted gently, “you’re an Olympic medalist asking out a girl who’s attended almost every stop of the tour just to watch you skate.”
A pause.
“…Okay when you phrase it like THAT—”
“You’re fine,” Amber laughed.
Still, Alysa’s hands shook before stepping onto the ice.
Because suddenly this wasn’t hypothetical anymore.
Tonight she was actually going to ask you out.
Meanwhile, completely unaware of the coordinated emotional chaos happening behind the scenes—
You sat front row like always.
Excited.
Happy.
Totally unsuspecting.
The show flew by in a blur for Alysa.
Every performance felt faster than usual because all she could think about was afterward.
Every time she passed your section, your smile somehow made her even more nervous.
By the finale, Alysa thought she might actually throw up.
Then the show ended.
Crowds started filing out slowly.
And operation ask out cute fan officially began.
A security guard approached your section politely.
“Excuse me?”
You looked up immediately confused.
“Yes?”
“Could you come with me for a moment?”
Your stomach DROPPED.
Immediately.
“Oh my god.”
The guard blinked.
“What?”
“Am I in trouble?”
Nearby audience members turned to stare.
“No,” the guard said quickly. “Nothing bad.”
Your anxiety absolutely did not believe him.
As he escorted you through backstage hallways, your brain rapidly cycled through every possible terrible explanation.
Did you accidentally break a rule?
Were you somewhere you shouldn’t be?
Did they think you were stalking the tour because you attended multiple shows???
“Oh my god,” you whispered to yourself. “I’m getting banned from figure skating.”
The security guard looked deeply concerned now.
“No one is banning you.”
“That sounds exactly like something someone says before banning a person.”
Finally the guard stopped outside a closed backstage door.
Inside, muffled whispering immediately erupted.
“She’s here.”
“Oh my god positions everybody.”
“Alysa stop pacing.”
“I CAN’T.”
You froze completely.
Wait.
What?
Before you could process anything further, the door slowly opened.
And your entire brain short-circuited.
Fairy lights glowed softly around backstage decorations.
Flowers sat scattered everywhere.
Half the Stars on Ice cast hid terribly behind props pretending not to stare.
And standing directly in the middle of it all—
Looking more nervous than you had ever seen another human being—
Was Alysa Liu.
Holding flowers.
Your mouth fell open slightly.
“Alysa?”
Behind her, Amber aggressively whispered:
“ASK HER OUT BEFORE YOU PASS OUT.”
Alysa glared briefly over her shoulder before looking back at you immediately.
And somehow she looked even more nervous now.
“Hi,” she said weakly.
You stared at her in complete disbelief.
“Am I… not in trouble?”
Ilia snorted loudly from somewhere behind a curtain.
Alysa laughed nervously.
“No. Oh my god no.”
Relief physically left your body.
“Okay good because I genuinely thought I was being escorted out forever.”
“So,” she started carefully, “this is maybe insane—”
“Definitely insane,” Amber corrected.
“Thank you Amber.”
You laughed softly despite your confusion.
And the second Alysa heard that laugh, she visibly relaxed slightly.
“I noticed you’ve been coming to a lot of shows,” Alysa admitted shyly.
Your face turned pink instantly.
“Oh.”
“And I know this is probably weird because technically we don’t really know each other yet,” Alysa continued, “but every time I skate and see you in the audience, it kinda becomes the best part of my night.”
Your heart stopped.
Behind Alysa, multiple skaters looked seconds away from emotional collapse.
“She practiced that speech in the mirror,” Amber stage-whispered.
“I HATE ALL OF YOU.”
You laughed again, softer this time.
Then Alysa smiled nervously while holding the flowers out toward you.
“So… maybe after the tour ends, would you wanna go on a date with me?”
Silence.
Real silence.
Because honestly?
You had spent months secretly crushing on Alysa Liu while fully believing nothing would ever happen.
And now an Olympic medalist was standing under fairy lights asking you out while an entire skating cast watched like emotionally invested parents.
“Yeah,” you said immediately.
Alysa blinked.
“…Yeah?”
You smiled so hard your cheeks hurt.
“Yes, Alysa. I’ll go on a date with you.”
The entire backstage area erupted instantly.
Amber screamed.
Isabeau nearly started crying.
Ilia yelled “I KNEW IT.”
And Alysa?
Alysa looked so happy it almost didn’t seem real.
Then quietly, almost like she still couldn’t believe this was happening, she smiled at you and whispered—
“Okay cool because I’ve been panicking for like three weeks.”
Dating you had taught Alysa two very important things.
One: long-distance was genuinely awful.
And two: she was embarrassingly in love with you.
Not casual love.
Not chill love.
The kind of love where she saw something funny online and instinctively reached for her phone to send it to you before remembering you were currently six time zones away in France.
It was ridiculous.
Especially because both of your schedules were chaos.
After returning to competitive skating following her retirement, Alysa's life had become busy again almost overnight. Training camps, competitions, media appearances, Olympic preparation-it felt like the entire skating world was obsessed with her comeback story.
Meanwhile you were somehow equally impossible to schedule around.
International matches.
Brand deals.
Travel.
Recovery.
Training.
Your face was on billboards in multiple countries and Alysa still somehow got flustered every time she saw interviews of you online.
Which was exactly why both of you had agreed early on to keep your relationship private.
Not secret.
Just protected.
Because some things deserved to belong only to you.
Still, it became difficult sometimes.
Especially during moments like this.
Alysa sat curled beneath layers of blankets inside the Olympic Village in Italy, laptop balanced on her knees while watching your soccer match livestream from France at an absolutely unreasonable hour of the night.
Amber Glenn had walked by earlier, noticed the game on-screen, and immediately grinned.
"Ohhh," she teased. "It's her."
Alysa had thrown a pillow at them.
Now she sat alone in her room wearing your hoodie and trying not to look painfully obvious every time the camera focused on you.
Which was impossible.
Because you looked unreal tonight.
Focused.
Fast.
Completely dominant on the field.
Every time you touched the ball the crowd reacted instantly.
And Alysa?
Alysa looked at you the way poets wrote about people.
"Come on, baby," she whispered nervously to the screen near the end of the match.
Seconds later, you scored.
Alysa screamed so loudly someone banged on the Olympic Village wall.
She ignored them completely.
By the time the match ended in a victory, Alysa was grinning so hard her face hurt.
Then came the post-match interviews.
You stood near the sidelines still breathing heavily from the game while cameras crowded around you.
Sweat clung to your hairline, your jersey sleeves pushed up slightly as reporters fired questions nonstop.
Alysa softened immediately seeing you smile tiredly.
God.
She missed you.
"So," the interviewer said with a grin, "in the second half we noticed you kept looking toward the stands several times."
Your expression changed instantly.
Subtle.
But Alysa noticed.
Always.
The interviewer raised an eyebrow teasingly.
"Anyone special you were playing for tonight?"
Back in Italy, Alysa nearly dropped her laptop.
Because both of you normally dodged questions like this professionally.
But instead of laughing it off immediately-
You smiled.
Softly.
The exact smile reserved for Alysa alone.
"Oh," you said quietly. "Definitely."
Alysa froze completely.
The interviewer perked up instantly.
"Oh? So there IS someone?"
You laughed a little, clearly trying not to say too much.
"There's someone very important to me watching from another country right now."
Alysa's entire chest melted.
The interviewer looked delighted.
"Athlete too?"
You nodded once.
"Yeah."
Then your expression softened even more somehow.
"She's competing right now too, actually."
Alysa physically covered her face with one hand.
Because she already knew where this was going.
And she was not emotionally prepared.
The interviewer smiled knowingly.
"You looked really emotional after your goal tonight."
You glanced briefly toward the stands again before answering.
"She's been supporting me through everything lately," you admitted. "Even with how crazy both our schedules are."
Your voice carried so much affection Alysa thought she might actually combust.
"She's probably one of the most hardworking people I've ever met," you continued softly. "And honestly... watching her come back to something she loves so much has been really inspiring."
Alysa's eyes immediately burned.
Because she knew exactly what you meant.
Her comeback.
Everything she'd been rebuilding after retiring young following the 2022 Olympics.
The fear she carried returning to elite skating after walking away from it all.
And somehow you always understood her better than anyone else did.
Back on-screen, the interviewer tilted their head curiously.
"You sound very in love."
You laughed quietly.
"Yeah," you admitted easily. "I really am."
Alysa buried her face into her knees immediately.
"Oh my god."
The interviewer looked seconds away from begging for a name.
But you just shook your head smiling.
"We like keeping it private."
"Protecting her identity?"
"Protecting us," you corrected gently.
Something about that answer made Alysa's heart ache in the best possible way.
Because yes.
That was exactly it.
Not hiding.
Protecting.
Keeping something soft away from the noise of public attention.
Then the interviewer asked one final question.
"If she's watching right now, anything you wanna say to her?"
Your entire face lit up instantly.
And Alysa already knew she was done for.
"I'd tell her..." you started slowly, "that I hope she remembers how proud I am of her."
Alysa's throat tightened immediately.
"She spent so much of her life under pressure," you continued softly. "And seeing her genuinely happy competing again means everything to me."
The cameras captured your smile growing warmer.
"And also," you added teasingly, "she seriously needs to sleep more."
Alysa gasped dramatically at her laptop.
"RUDE."
You laughed.
Then quieter-
"And I miss her a lot."
The interview wrapped shortly afterward.
But Alysa stayed frozen staring at the screen long after it ended.
Her chest hurt.
Not painfully.
Just full.
Completely full of love.
Seconds later, her phone buzzed.
You ❤️
did you watch?
Alysa smiled so hard it almost hurt.
Alysa ❤️
no actually i blacked out emotionally halfway through
You ❤️
good <3
Alysa laughed softly to herself before typing again.
Alysa ❤️
i miss you too btw
Three dots appeared instantly.
You ❤️
win your medal and come home to me
And suddenly the Olympic Village thousands of miles away didn't feel quite so lonely anymore.