"Love always hurts, doesn't it?"
“Yes... that’s very true...”
He didn’t expect someone so young to understand that fact. Being marked as the villain to the story lead to much heartache and pain. And yet here he was... He ran away from his own story, from angels and demons, from the army he fought to protect just to find a moment of peace. He lost everything, had no will to fight anymore, and now was wandering endlessly in the dimensions and universes his father created. Unknowing that it was Michael that locked him in a time loop. Unknowing that God released him from his punishment, believing his broken heart to be too weak to give him the strength to rise from the ashes for a third time. They’d be correct to assume that fact... Without Akira or Amon he was, in every way, too broken to continue.
And yet now he was here. Beautiful angel found wounded and alone on the edge of the Phantomhive Manor in winter snow. Taken in by the ‘kindness’ of the Earl that lived there. The Earl that’d become the only friend in this new book of his life. Guardian Angel locked to him via unofficial means, watchful blue eyes filled with grief and hatred. Some days he couldn’t find the will to rise from slumber. Some days he would vanish from the grounds. But like a lost dog he always came back, Ciel and Sebastian knew this well enough. They were oblivious to his story, catching snippets, the demon aware of the battle between demons and angels, but Ciel... He was none the wiser to anything. Just knowing Satan was as benign as a caged rabbit until provoked.
Some would say he had become a servant... But at the same time he didn’t look like a servant. He did things around the house, but for the most part it was never asked of him. It was never requested of him. He was in a strange gray area. As though he never found one or the other. Parties would come and he’d help the servants set up, then disappear into the darkness with no sign of him, reclusive and quiet he would retreat. He did his best to be unheard or unseen, and yet all the same it didn’t seem to be because it was a servant’s job, more as though he was ashamed for anyone to know he existed here. Even the other servants seemed unsure of what to call him...
“Love is the most painful and yet simultaneously beautiful emotion that anyone could ever feel.”
Angels don’t feel love. They never truly have. But Ryo... He wasn’t just an angel. He was forced to live with man, he had learned to love and feel passion with the demons. The clawed embrace of Amon, the gentle warmth of Akira, he experienced it all. Kisses laced with wine and sins embroidered in blood and pain. As such he grew to love so much more than he’d ever admit. Hidden away in the darkness of the manor, moonlight coursing through an open window. The room was mostly empty, a room he disappeared to in the quietest of nights. The girl, he knew her from occasional visits, but for the most part he had never grown to know her personally. Just knew the fact that she was to be married to the Earl of Phantomhive. Arranged marriages, from what he’s known, weren’t often acquainted with love, and yet with how she acted it seemed she loved him regardless... Pure eyes eager to become a wife, unknowing that the man she loves will die before anything can truly become of him.
The scent of lead, the sound of scratching paper. He stared down at the illustration and felt the sting of tears. That’s what he did all alone. If anyone ever wondered what the devil did in his spare time it was retreat into the quietest place and draw, write, or muse over mistakes. Akira’s visage upon paper, just as he remembered him. So full of life, so full of joy, a joy that was gained from someone who wouldn’t ever love him fully... Someone Ryo was so jealous of, and yet never intended to kill. Miki... He truly did drop the baton he supposed.
“But I’ve only ever experienced it once in my life, and before I could truly appreciate it, the person that held my heart left me for another... Before they could come back, they became a ghost.”
((Note: I put this in my Kuroshitsuji mutliverse extension -- I’m willing to explain that verse in depth in PMs))
