#anxiousgoddest write

[anxiousgoddest]

LADS boys live reaction when they come home to you asleep with your hands on yo pants 😔🫵🏽

You had a long day, and your baby wasn't home, so you needed some relief immediately, even if it meant solo playing urself... You might've overestimated how actually tired you were tho. tags: Crack, not actually smut, an attempt at smut? 🧐, still MDNI! AFAB reader.

This was supposed to be made last year, the idea came when I was goin thru my college finals but how was I supposed to make this while fighting for my life? I ain't 13 making Supernatural Destiel porn anymore fam 😔🤞🏽

Caleb

The day was shit.

No no, I mean SHIT.

Did you know wanderers had guts? Maybe so, but didn't that mean they had a food-digestion system then? I mean, that's how it goes. But no one knows what wanderers eat anyway, BUT IT SMELLS AWFUL WHEN THEY EXPLODE ALL OVER YOU.

And why did you have to deal with the goddamn nerd of the Wanderer evaluation data control sector fussing over you because it was a BIG discovery?

Also, the building's electricity went off due to a metaflux, so you were smelly, AND STUCK IN AN ELEVATOR WITH HIM FOR 2 HOURS.

So yeah, the day was bad. Bad enough that now you are sitting on the shower (there's a in built tile stool to shave legs, don't worry, it's not bad enough to sit on the floor 💔).

And like, hey girly...

You do be mad, but you're also mad horny too 🤞🏽🤞🏽

So your hands travel down to your body, groping where you like.

You really wanted a massage tho...

But Caleb wasn't here, which adds to the frustration, you sexy Colonel childhood sweetpie wasn't here to bend you over and massage your calf. (or bending over too that would be so neat 😔*sighhhh)

Your body relaxes more and more under your own ministrations, the hot water, your hands, and finally your back, hitting the wall aching for some rest.

And most importantly, that wanderer shit smell is LEAVING

You sighed and closed your eyes

...

When you opened your eyes again you see Caleb looking at you like this

LIKE WHAT? WHY IS YOU HERE? WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?

He stares at you for one moment, he's crouching in front of you, a bit wet from the shower (dumbass didn't turn it off)

"What... I dozed off," you said, already coming up with an explanation.

"Pipsqueak..."

"I hate you"

"Baby, wait!-" That goofy bitch called for you as you leave butt naked.

He has the decency to offer to continue where you left but you just stare at him like you're dead inside.

6/10 teased you the next day and actually busted out laughing, saying he thought you were dead after jorking your bean.

Kablow him. Please.

Sylus

Having a uterus was NOT for the weak, chat

PMS week, where you feel like a bitch, and you cry when you drop your keys at your doorstep.

And now you currently can't sleep either, even though your body is so damn tired.

At least your favorite magaka just updated your fave bara yaoi so yeah

Jorking time fellas 😎

Your pants? Gone. Your phone? Ready.

But this week it seemed that the author wanted to make the chapter more lore-heavy, so instead of rubbing the bean you just playing with your pubes like damn man

But at some point, the manga is reading you cuz u long gone

And THAT'S when the Onycunterson Sylus decided to come back home too 😤🙄

So he was a bit shocked to see you hand on your pants, phone in hand looking like a star fish in bed like 😭😭😭😭

He doesn't wake you, but he does regret checking out what you were reading

Did not expect to see a hairy dick and a hairy asshole this early 💀

7/10 lets you sleep, but he lost points because he said that your old man yaoi looked ugly :[ THEY ARE VERY DEAR TO ME SYLUS LEAVE THEM ALONE.

Zayne

So u had arrived a bit earlier from work

a "little reward" according to Jemna, but the week was HELL

Wanderers spawning left and right, the fleet was cockblocking your job and EVER was being a bitch as always

Like every complication that could happen, happened.

So after a shower you didn't even bother to eat anything just falling flat on your bed

I mean your and Zayne's bed

Dude

no i'm fr now

THINK ABOUT SOMEONE WHO SMELLS DIVINE

not just his perfume, cologne no no no

like i swear man you just need to just grab him and smell his armpits

like i promisse you it will change ur life

I'M NOT CRAZY

but yeah you're only human man

with a scent kink perchance?

Your hands just... get a life on their own, you know?

But fellas don't jork it with your eyes closed while you're tired

or else you'll wake up to this:

Gets more worried than find it funny

will laugh if you laugh tho but he just looks at you worried

BUT OFC HE'S HAPPY TO HELP

All worried in one moment but will jump your bones like foxy fazzbear if you say you want him.

Rafayel

I will not even glaze much fellas

When you fall asleep mid jorking it he will just

Dumb ass fish 😒

Will look like a soggy wet puppy when you just refuse to let him help you

You gotta be strong tho

Because he offers to massage your tired muscles and MAN 😭😭😭😭😭

HIS HANDS ARE SO GOOD AT IT

REFUSE HIM. HE LAUGHED AT YOU. YOU MUST RESIST HIS CHARMS!

I KNOW HE'S CUTE BUT BRO 😭 HE'S MEAN ABOUT IT

4/10 I couldn't resist him 😔

Xavier

He was home, but he was like dead asleep beside you

You two have been working so hard lately, and things are a bit tense between you two after the latest Traceback team stuff (No spoilers here, don't worry)

So yeah, I mean

You can't just "Hey, pookie, can I suck yo dick and lick your balls?" DUDE HE JUST LOST EVERYTHING CHILL 😭😭😭😭

It didn't feel right ngl so you just... deal with it yourself

(And bf yall nasty asses say something, you two didn't talk about somno yet WE HAVE BOUNDARIES IN THIS BLOG)

But man, Xavier just has this sleepy gravitational pull

You weren't going very far your eyes were very heavy

But for a man that sleeps like a rock, HE SURELY HAD A 6TH INSTINCT FOR SEX

Your soul abandoned you quicker than yo momma when that man just

"What are you doing?"

Having a heart attack baby, don't worry 😘😘😘😘😍😍😍

Freakatron2000 best in linkon shit

He knows what you're doing, he's just being a goof

"Itching my balls, Xavier." you just deadpanned with your heart still running a mile

"...Mine itch too."

"OH MY GOD YOU DID NOT-"

8/10 helped you with your needs, lost points for having ZERO RIZZ and lost aura points.

Based on something that happened to me, but luckily I didn't get caught, I just sat there thinking how much this stupid diploma is costing me (my gooning time bruh)

BUT YEAH GOON BUT ALSO SLEEP FELLAS HAVE A NICE DAY

[anxiousgoddest]

I had a vision....

Of how the boys would share gossip with you babes and I KNOW THIS IS A BOP HEAR ME OUTTTT😭✋🏽✋🏽✋🏽✋🏽

Pairing: Zayne, Xavier, Rafayel and Sylus.

Tags: Crack, bullet format, bad memes, fic under the cut cuz my long dick energy extend to my fics too and you know the drill IG idk ╮⁠(⁠.⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ⁠ ⁠❛⁠.⁠)⁠╭

Zayne zaddy

I always start with him cuz he's my favorite AND I'M LOYAL NO MATTER WHAT AND NO MATTER WHAT CROW MAN SHOWS UP

Anyways

He's totally the type to be like

"Honey this sort of thing is not good blablabla" 🙄✋🏽

And then you have to explain that this is just like commenting on a show on other people's drama like babe plsssss 🙄✋🏽✋🏽✋🏽you just collecting knowledge to not make the same mistakes like duh 🙄

But real chat you gonna have to convince him the importance of the ~TEA~ to one person's life.

After converting his ass believe it or not

He's an ally 🫡🫡🫡

He'll end up giving you JAW DROPPING INSIGHTS

Because he's a doctor, lemme show you an example:

Two days ago one of your coworkers broke crying outta nowhere and even though you weren't close to her after seeing such a nice girl crying you and Tara decided that she is your baby and you know her for two days but you'll kill and die for her 😠😠😠😠😠😠✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽

#WeGotchuMikailey #Girlhood

Happens that her boyfriend Ricky of 6 YEARS broke up with her🫢

Outta nowhere 🤨🤨🤨🤨🧐

And you and Tara got sus, but like sheesh girl dump his ass he doesn't deserve anyway 🙄💅🏽

But you and Tara were like 👀👀 to each other

But ofc you didn't say nothing cuz that's not what poor Mikailey needed and goddamn you 2 remember seeing her bringing her bf to parties at work and she always looked so happy while that guy looked like some ugly ass yabba Dabba Doo bitch

Screw you Ricky you're ugly 😠

Anyways back to today

You and Zayne went out shopping for a strawberry bag that you've seen on tic tok and Zayne was tagging along and everything was lovely

UNTIL ✋🏽✋🏽✋🏽✋🏽✋🏽

BITCH GUESS WHAT 🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡

EFFING RICKY WAS THERE

WITH A GIRL 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

THAT ASSHOLE

And Zayne knew about the tea cuz ofc you nagged him about it cuz duh?

And as I said he's an ally 🫡

So he's the one to give you the look

You know THE LOOK, right? 🧐

Yeah that one

And after living so long with this man a TWITCH on his eyebrow and you eyes are OPEN BESTIE 👁️👁️

And that's when you see and different from him you gawk cuz screw you Ricky² 😠

And when they leave and your face is still 😠

He gently leans down and start holding and checking on a bag and you look at him confused cuz does he want a bag now?

"That girl is pregnant."

?

HUHHHHHH?????????

"She's 3 months pregnant."

HUHHHHHHH????

You got hands on your head like YOOOOO

You make the calculations and oh boy

Poor Mikailey 😥😥😥😥😥😥

So that's the reason he broke up with her and she doesn't even know

You tell Tara about it and she runs straight to yo house, she literally break the door down like the freaking SWAT like girl chill the Landlord finna kill me 😭😭😭😭

And while you're both talking on the kitchen table (cuz food and gossip is always good 💅🏽🩷🩷)

You both debate like it's a national matter, area 51 type of secret shit

Wondering if you should tell Mikailey the truth because of closure or if it's best to let her in the dark, and while you two were debating you hear a voice

Haspy and full of knowledge

(also mega sexy but FOCUS)

"The wise man doesn't say everything he thinks, but he thinks everything he says."

Oh damn okay Mr.Smartpants talk yo shit IG 😳😳😳😳

He gives his input like some elder wise creature and both you and Tara sit listening to him like

In the end, you both decided not to, Mikailey deserves better anyway

Anyways SCREW YOU RICKY 👹👹👹👹👹👹👹

Xavier lil meow meow

At first you thought that he just didn't care so you would just yap and yap and yap to him about the things that you witnessed and heard like you were in a podcast or summ

But pookie I kid you not

This man knows his shit

And he WILL shock you with his knowledge

Like when you were talking to a guy at the office one day about the sudden detour of Intel regarding a secret mission on the N109 zone, because chat how the hell did the goddamn whole twittuh knew about it??

Who leaked that shit bro?

While you were both discussion the situation and it's annoying repercussions because the effing target obviously escaped, Xavier was napping away on his desk

And that the thing

Xavier blends so well in the scenario that it looks like a "Where's Wally" game.

And nobody notice him 😈

So after you sit on your desk with a huff trying to figure this mess out you hear a soft sleepy voice.

"He's lying..."

Ok bitch first thing first:

Second thing second:

STOP LAUGHING YOU BITCH I ALMOST DIED YO WEWE AHH SPOOKIE BITCH GIVE IT A WARNING 👹👹👹👹👹👹👹

After the heart attack 🙄

He tells you that the guy was lying because this guy is trying to become TikTok famous, but he by accident opened a Livestream while he was working and it showed his screen

WITH THE WHOLE MISSION DETAILS 😠😠😠😠😠😠😠

So ofc twittuh found out and it spreaded like wildfire so that's why everyone is in this shitty situation and while you're searching for the source of the post to snitch on that stupid braindead douche you realize....

How does he know allat?

"Xav pookie..."

"Yes, my star?"

UGH EDHDOBFJORWBVHKEFBVJLWFBVFJOE HE'S SO 😭😭😭😭😭🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽

"How'd ya know that?"

"Oh I was taking a nap here when he woke me up while panicking over it and I heard him say everything 🙂"

Have you ever wished to be a little fly to hear certain conversations?

WELL YOUR PROBLEMS ARE OVER CUZ U HAVE THIS ONE CUTIE BOY

At least kinda

Don't get too excited honey I'm sorry 😭😭😭😭

Because he's still a man 😭😭😭😭

So one day when you nagging him about a juicy gossip about Jenna and a new girl THAT YOU CAN SMELL THE GODDAMN GAY RAINBOWS AND SHIT🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

He just hit you with the most boring answers 😭😭😭😭😭

"So??? Did she say she's into girls????"

"Uh maybe?"

"WHADDYA MEAN BABE 😭😭😭😭"

"She didn't confirm it."

"But did at least ask???? 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹"

"No."

"WHY NOOOOT???? 👹👹👹👹👹"

"I don't know 🤷🏼‍♂️"

Rafafish

Bro

This guy here

HE BRINGS THE JUICE, THE TEA AND THE TABLE 💅🏽💅🏽💅🏽💅🏽💅🏽💅🏽

Best gossip buddy frfr 🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡

And it's so funny when Thomas get dragged to it cuz it looks like the mean girls trio, the Powerpuff girls 💅🏽😚😚😚😚

(Don't think Thomas is a victim he's all for the tea too he's just a cynical little brat playing saint 🙄)

But Rafayel is that friend on the GC that honestly if the conversation gets leaked that guy is getting arrested 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Cuz he says the most out of pocket shit like:

"Of course it's a white woman with Karen hair cut 🙄✋🏼"

"RAFAYEL SHUT UPPPPP WE IN PUBLIC 😡😡"

"DID I LIE THO??? 👹👹👹👹"

"SHUDUPP 👹👹"

Thomas: 👁️👄👁️🍿

And when the three of you are together chaos is ensured.

But it's an organized chaos for sure 🤭🤭🤭💅🏽

The thing is that Rafayel didn't care much about gossip, but there's something so especial about doing this journalistic commentary about other people's life like 😩😩😩😩😩

And drama is always fun, as long it's not in your life ofc 👁️👄👁️.

So you two (sometimes three) do this detective research because you're two curious little fish that can't resist some juicy bait and like what can go wrong when you literally have a god of the sea beside like duh?? 🙄💅🏽

Which brings you to this situation that you and Rafa are stuck in a storage room listening to an old lady get her dusty rusty cootchie pounded by a 19 year old dude 😭😭😭😭😭😭

YALL WHAT A BAD DAY TO HAVE PERFECT HEARING

YOU AND RAFA ARE SO READY TO PUKE PLS 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤢🤢🤢🤢

EWWWW YOU JUST WANTED TO KNOW SOME NASTY ABOUT THE OLD LADY THAT WAS HARASSING RAFA BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO SEE ALLAT

You're both traumatized and promised to never do this shit again

Until EFFING THOMAS SHOWED UP

Thomas: Did you two hear that lady Melissa is pregnant?

You two: So? 🤨

Thomas: Guys, she's pregnant of 5 months.

You two: yeah? 🤨🤨🤨🤨

Thomas: Her husband came back from a business trip just 3 months ago.

You two RIGHT AFTER:

Sylussy

Attention whore. Period.

"ur duh he's not even released yet"

ATTENTION.WHORE. I KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING TRUST ✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽

He's the one to entertain you dropping the craziest shit ever from the N109 zone.

He loves to see your shocked reaction and how you look like an excited kitty that can't help but be lured when they see something curious.

"And that's how you lure a kitten that likes gossip 😉😏"

And then you proceed to throw a whole chair at him for edging you CUZ WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS LADY PAYED HER SON'S GIRLFRIEND TO HAVE SEX WITH HER HUSBAND????? WHAT TYPE OF LATIN SND COREAN DORAMA IS THIS 😭😭😭😭😭😭

He loves how you drop everything to chase after him through his den like he's playing tag

And you may think "omg he's so silly and fun😍😍😍😝😝😝"

NOOO 👹👹👹👹

IT'S A PAIN IN THE ASS 👹👹👹👹

CUZ I JUST WANT TO KNOW WASSUP GODDAMN 😭😭😭😭

And that's not even all p

He also likes to drop you little riddles for you to play detective

It's basically he's luring you into a running wheel like you're his little hamster pet 😭😭😭😭

He just like to see you running around and after him like a mad woman

And he likes to see the gears and the smoke pushing out of your head like:

He's a simp but he's annoying 😭😭😭😭

SOMEBODY STOP THIS MAN I STILL WANNA KNOW WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT WHAT THE LADY WAS COOKING YO 👹👹👹👹

And when you complain that he's being a lil prick about it he just says something dumb like

"When the bait is luring enough, anyone can fall victim to it, and you, my cute little hunter, just falls for it... All the time 👁️👁️."

"BRO LEAVE ME ALONE OKAY???? ✋🏽✋🏽✋🏽✋🏽✋🏽✋🏽"

Author notes: HI FELLAS I had this vision while pacing around my room in the dark while listening to music and yapping to the fake scenarios in mi head and I had this crazy idea!

I hope you guys have laughed and enjoyed it as much as I did and I hope all of you have a great update, can't wait to finally meet Sylus AND FINALLY BE ABLE TO LOCK IN ON ENEMIES CAN I GET AN AMEM EVERYBODY?? 👹👹👹👹✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽 (⁠┛⁠◉⁠Д⁠◉⁠)⁠┛⁠彡⁠┻⁠━⁠┻

[anxiousgoddest]

Since people on TikTok keep mischaracterizing our boys I thought it would be interesting to sail through dangerous territory and make headcanons about which red flags would the boys have as close as possible to canon.

Yes, I'm aware that this can be polemic and I invite everyone to question and even participate in the comments and reblogs!

Let's have fun! (Non silly fic ahead!)

TW: Stalking (hypothetical situation dw), self-harm, mass murder mentions, and trust issues.

Okay fellas so like, you guys know he's a criminal right? 😭😭😭

And before you say something like "Oh but so what?" bestie give me your hand here let me walk you to the point I'll make for you.

He lives a very dangerous life (and let's suppose you're MC but you have your own family.) and you will be dragged into this mess with him, he does not mean it and you might be understanding until criminals kill your pet and kidnap someone dear to you.

I believe many of us have our family and loved ones as our weaknesses, and that's okay, we are humans.

And that's just the tip of the iceberg 💀

"Oh, but this is fiction is not that deep I can just ignore that, how does his red flags affect our relationship?" Okay, I'll tell you.

His moral alignment I believe that's evil-neutral, why? Because he damn well is not Lawful good 💀 nor true neutral, he grew up surviving (as he said in the latest card) so all he knows is kill or be killed, and he enjoys having power.

He does not see life as something that important, and why would he? He can't be killed, if worms dare to cross his path and die that's the consequences of their own stupid actions.

And if worms try to hurt YOU 💀

The only thing stopping him from doing so is mostly you bby 😭

And I debated with a friend and we agreed that he wouldn't kill a citizen from Linkon straight up because you're a goody-two-shoes.

But if it's a criminal tho 💀

Friendly reminder our first encounter he literally exploded a guy for being greedy and he wasn't attached as he is to us now 💀💀💀

"Oh, but that's so romantic wow"...😰😰

Okay allow me to give you a hypothetical situation (Staking trigger warning!)

You had been dealing with an unknown stalker, constantly feeling dread to the point you couldn't sleep.

Sylus, with Mephisto's aid, found out about the situation.

Now this connects to my other Red flag too.

He won't tell you he knows this has happened.

And he won't tell he's the one responsible for that person disappearing either.

You might even tell him about how there was a sudden dismembered body in the alleyway two blocks from your place.

"Really sweety? That sounds so gruesome, I wonder what could have this person done to deserve that." You don't tell him that you recognized that man. And he doesn't mention the relief on your face.

But yeah...

It's very conflicting, but factually, it is still a red flag honey I'm just being realistic.

But as you can see, he will hide a lot of things from you 🚩🚩🚩🚩

And regardless of what you think, even if you asked, if he deems that you are unsafe he WILL deal with it, and if it's something you don't approve he will simply hide it and won't show a sign of guilt 🚩🚩🚩

And if for some reason you found out something and confronted him he would dance around the subject and that would make you go INSANE, but at some point would confess but he can be very persuasive.

And the moment you start to question if you should be really mad at him because all he did was for you, he won.

Would set the world on fire and call it rain for you.

No honey that's being self-destructive it's not good nor romantic for god's sake seek help 😭😭😭

*Sighs*

My baby, I'm so sorry for what I'm about to do 😭😭😭

"Oh but Zayne CAN'T have a red flag" Pause cause I thought so too 😔😔😔

THIS IS SO HARD CUZ HE'S MY MAN 😭😭😭😭

But yeah, he has a red flag because of his self-destructive behavior 😔😔

Honeys, somebody hold me this is so sad 😭😭😭😭

His love is so intense that it burns him.

Will kill himself a thousand times for you.

And as romantic as this looks in the papers, there's nothing that causes more despair than knowing someone is so dependent on you.

And the worst part of this all? He doesn't control it.

If you get hurt, he will spend day and night awake beside you at the hospital, and even if Dr. Greyson tells him to rest he won't.

He can't.

He can't close his eyes without having nightmares, nightmares of you bleeding in his arms to death.

If you disappear he will wither like a flower, until his sun (you) comes back.

And if you die...

...

Have heard of how elders just die of sadness after losing their partner? They neglect their health to the point they have no strength anymore...

"Oh, but Dawnbreaker-"

The pain of a life without meaning is not the same as the one who lost its meaning.

... :(

And it's draining darling, he can't help it.

And you can't help him either.

His self-destructive love can be extremely draining depending on how your mental health is.

He doesn't have much time because of work, you don't have either, and (considering you're a hunter) probably the few times you see each other you might fight because he's worried about you but then you call him out on his hypocrisy.

He is a sweetheart and whatever he does, he does for you, but Zayne only knows one way of love, and is giving his entire existence to you.

And ceasing it with you too.

Okay, I'll take it easy on this one... I hope

Listen... We all know that Rafayel pampers MC to DEATH and it's so 😭😭😭😭😭

Would burn down the entire ocean if you wanted fried fish for breakfast.

But it doesn't change the fact that because of him, children, elders, adults, pregnant all died

Waiting for their God to save them,

Praying for their God to rescue them from their fate.

But little did they know that their God had turned his back on them, just to save you.

And what else could they do?

Besides watching their God give his heart to his beloved, leaving them doomed to their end.

Sometimes, you have nightmares of screams muffled by the crashing waves and a loud beating heart, and the sight of the ocean turning red covered in pearls.

He's prone to say mean things when he's mad and gets jealous quite easily.

And there's so much in his chest that he might blame you for things that happened in the past, and when you're obviously confused because you don't remember and he didn't tell, he will push you away until he can slip his usual mask up again.

Also, one to mask his feelings.

"Oh but that's not a real red flag" Honey it is, the problem is that it affects him and since you love him it affects you too!

And listen, he wishes he could open up to you, tell you everything, his fears his troubles, but he's too afraid of losing you, of coming too strong.

And you wished he could tell you so he could release the pain in his chest but he won't.

So even if you see the sad glint in his eyes, he will not open up.

He can't bring himself to tell you the price he paid to love you.

Nor the fact that he would do it again.

Like my pookie @chaos-in-deepspace said: "Gaslight. Gatekeep. Girlboss" and they're so right 😭😭😭😭

Looked at us in the eye when we asked him if he was Lumiere and acted like we were crazy 💀💀🚩🚩

And whenever you confront him about an important matter he just goes:

You have to kabedon his ass until he yields and dude, it gets pretty annoying.

HAVE NO SENSE OF SELF PRESERVATION

HE WILL GET DECAPITATED FOR YOU AND JUST DO A THUMBS UP THAT GUYY

And yes, you love your soft boy, your good-looking boy.

BUT HE DOESN'T STOP COMING HOME INJURED

And as much as you nag him, he doesn't say about where he was and what he was doing and that you can't even come to terms with, but he won't even tell you where he is in case he is in danger.

So depending on how much of a worry-wart you are, this relationship will be a nightmare 💀💀

And also, like Sylus in a way 💀💀💀💀🚩🚩🚩

He WILL kill anyone if they mean any harm to you now or in the future.

And unlike Sylus, he does not care if it's a Linkon Citizen, if this person can be dangerous for you even in the future this person will be gone.

And you won't find out, like ever.

Jeremiah knows better than to question Xavier when he comes all bloodied at his shop.

Low-key, highly prone to be a yandere, more than any other LADS boy 💀💀💀

Thank you all for reading ❤️❤️

Please do feel free to add your own thoughts and comments too, my specialty is Zayne so literally asked for reinforcements lol 😭

Shout out again for my pookie for helping me out on this one and a true homie @EvilFishie on Twitter! Please check them out 😭😭😭 their art is amazing and check @chaos-in-deepspace for 5 start Michelin smut 😮‍💨😮‍💨

Thank you all for your attention 🥹🫶🏽

[anxiousgoddest]

Who has the worst pull out game and why is it one of the white haired men😔🤭

(My money's on Xavier🫠 you know what they say about those rabbits 🐇😔✊️)

YOU LITERALLY ARE A GENIUS COME HERE WE'RE MAKING OUT NOW

Yall heard mamacita fellas, I'm just a servant 😔🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

(I procrastinated so hard for this 😭😭😭)

Warnings: bestie... really? Like.... read the tittle 😭

WHICH OF THEM BOYS GOT THE WEAKEST PULL OUT GAME

(From the strongest to weakest)

Okay we finna start controversial here with....

Sylus

Yep

yeahh

if he wasn't here the first spot would be Zayne but welp

Listen, we don't know his deep lore yet but ik this mf is also yearner trust 🤞

But REGARDLESS IRREGARDLESS

This prick is a sadistic prick

he's straight up "I either win or everybody finna lose" typa shit

He will edge himself if it means he gets to see your teary-eyed frustrated face 😔

And as I said he's a sadist if you say you don't want him to come inside or sumn his pull-out game suddenly is so weak like 😞😞😞 his thick veiny cock can't be controlled kitten he's just a boy 🎀✨

(Btw only if it's like with consent, of course, he would never play about that we only talking about a playful situation so he won't be trying to knock u up without consent 😭😭😭)

But if u the type to love creampies 🤤😫 (but is scared of getting pregnant 😔)

SUDDENLY HE'S THE EPITOME OF SELF CONTROL

HE WOULD NUT IN THE TOILET AND FLUSH IT DOWN JUST TO MAKE YOU WATCH AND SUFFER THAT SON OF A BITCH

He's getting sat on his face for his crimes 😠😠😠

No air jail sis, lock his bratty ass up in between yo thights

Zayne

on second place indeed

but only because he's a YEARNER.

And we all know that Zayne having an ice evol is simply ironic because his love BURNS him from within this whole body.

Ik he shivers and gasps and hides his face on your shoulder when he nuts and HE WON'T let you go, cuddles are a must, especially for him.

So he's very careful and as a doctor, he knows that coitus interrupts are not effective so if you two are set on not having kids he will simply wear a condom.

But for the love of God pls don't ask him to pull out cuz my guy here IS WEEEEEEEEAK 😫😫😫😫😫😫

So basically he got the "strongest" pull-out game because

HE DOESN'T MESS AROUND CUZ HE DOESN'T WANNA FIND OUT AND HE'S SELF AWARE LMAAAAAAO

now, coming to the next fellas tho...

Rafayel

Rafayel the fishman???? HUUUUH??

ik ik ik hear me out

yes, he's a simp that lowkey doomed his whole kind for some cootchie;

Yes, he almost died because of said cootchie;

And yes, despite everything he still everything HE WOULD DO IT AGAIN.

If Rafayel ever comes for president yall better not vote his ass he is killing us all, bro, 💀

But anyway yeah fellas he has more self-control than Xavier

for two reasons:

One is that Rafayel is the type to nut by giving you head.

I said what I said period.

But okay real argument is that either he would pull out right when he feels he's about to nut (he will nut while fingering u and seeing u trust frfr)

orrrrrr

you're like me and would never reject a Sea God milk 😔

Fellas listen we need to help the guy build Lemuria back guys 😫😫😫

So we gotta handle both of his dick 😪 (this information is real my dog leaked it straight from infold) NEVER BACK DOWN NEVER WHAT? ✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽

To the other reason I mentioned 7 bullets ago, we go to our next homie:

Xavier

Brother

I think this goes without saying 🙂

like lady was absolutely right

"oh but Rafayel waited 300 years" "Oh but Zayne has been through many lifetimes yearning for you" "Oh but Sylus (redacted intel only available when INFOLD drop the GODDAMN MYTHS)"

yea yea BUT XAVIER CAN'T WAIT AND WHY WOULD HE 😭😭😭😭

FREE MY MAN FROM THE SHACKLES OF THY CONDOM MY LIEGE HE'S JUST A FAIR GENTLEMAN WHO HAS DONE NO WRONG ✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽

Sistah, brother, thems and theys there's no king Arthur who can unsheath his sword from thy hole my beloved

AND DARE I PERHAPS SAY MORE? YES!

The reason he's rock bottom here is cuz he does not give a shit he WILL nut inside

And if you tell him to pull out he'll give the puppiest eye a puppy has ever eyed

(No... He's not a red flag Stacy... HE'S JUST A CUTE BUNNY)

But from all the boys here he would be the one who would oblige the quickest to get a vasectomy without question, he's responsible and if you ever feel like you want to change plans and adopt later he will literally be in for it. His body, his life, his heart is yours.

(Yeah i need to add some romantic stuff CUZ THIS WAS GETTING NASTY LMAAAAAAAAAO)

And that's pretty much it fellas give me yo feedback BUT TALK TO THE WALL IF YOU THINK XAVIER IS NOT THE WEAKEST 😭😭😭

Just take the Lumiere creampie goddam 😞😞

(Hory shiet should I do something about rating the lads cum? Omg what has my blog become?)

[anxiousgoddest]

😭HOW WOULD THE LADS REACT TO A MINOR BEING OBSESSED WITH THEM 😭

Okay first thing first shout out again for @chaos-in-deepspace for being my eyes since I can't use Twitter in Brasil cuz ELON MUSK IS A LIL BITCH

So basically in Twitter there was some minors trying to ward away adults from playing the game because it's "cringe" and they "didn't want old grown ups in there" (as if the game isn't fund by our adult money 🤡🤡🤡) and I guess y'all can see what am I doing here cuz I can't take anything serious and I thought it would be funny LMAOOOOOO.

Tags: crack fic, stalking, our boys actually get harassed here tho 😭😭😭😭, bullet fic, gifs and emoji usage, possible spoilers about anecdotes or myths, proof reading? Proof read DEEZ NUT- Pairing: The lads boys, Yvone, Greyson.

Okay we all know he's a sweetheart 🫶🏼

Pretty soft, pretty responsible, a bit of an air head but honestly we all trust our little Xavier baby

Unless when it comes to cooking 💀

So when a high schooler girl come at him, wiggling eyebrows in her school uniform saying some weird stuff like calling him "onii-san 😋😆" or whatever he's like 🙂😐🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨

He thinks that they are lost and straight up ask "Where's your parents little kid?" And he's already looking around to see if there's any adult looking like they're searching something or someone.

And he doesn't pay any mind to the girl saying weird stuff like "I'm inviting you to a date!" Or "You're super hot!"

But when the weird kid grab his arm and start rubbing their chest on his bicep and lifting their (ALREADY) short skirt he's like:

Bro 💀

When I said that he TELEPORTED OUTTA THERE 🧍🏼‍♂️💨

And then he came back,

Only to teleport them with him,

TO THE POLICE STATION 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

Then like the good ole Xavier we all know he is:

Okay I love hating on Sylus and his pure discord mod Wattpad "My parents sold me to a rich mafia guy" 2016 behavior

But low-key I feel bad for him cuz he's literally the biggest victim of every mischaracterization and thirst from minors 🤡🤡🤡🤡

RIP mister Onycoochie leader

But yeah anyways this man did not escape from an intergalactic prison to catch another case

MUCH LESS BY BEING A PREDATOR 💀💀💀💀

HE LITERALLY HUNTS DOWN PREDATORS ON the N109 ZONE AND SHUT DOWN HUMAN TRAFFICKING BRO 😭😭😭😭😭(that's my personal headcanon btw cuz I think he's that cool yanno?)

So when there's this little girl that is like 13 chasing after him at first he thinks it's cute, and even humors her little crush thinking that when she grows up he will tease her about it

Just like these older guys that you grew up with and are kinda like your older brothers or uncles?

Yeah, that's what he was thinking about.

So that's literally his face the moment he hears A KID saying something FOUL as calling him "Daddy 🥰😘"

Nah dawg 💀

This is literally the next 10 seconds of it:

He's kicking their ass away from his shawtie ewwww ur a kid what the hell is wrong with you

Will be forever traumatized 😭😭😭😭

Whenever you invite him somewhere and he end up hearing a squeal of a teenager he's hiding in a coner like he has PTSD 😭😭😭

(which is kinda crazy because how can a guy this tall disappear like that tho?)

He still feel nervours at the plushie arcade, he says that it's because he doesn't like crowded spaces, which is not a lie, but he mostly wanna avoid the hours where kids leave school and stuff

no, he won't ever tell you why he have beef with teens 💀💀💀

OKAY SO HE

He is popular and he knows

And he low-key hates it

Cuz my guy just wanna paint and be a simp in peace 😮‍💨✊🏽

So when there's this girl following him in every event

Every single art exhibition

He's so done 💀

Brothar when I tell you that the first thing he wanna do is to go BACK to the sea like this:

I ain't joking 😭😭😭

My brother is calling the police

He's calling you 😭😭😭😭😭

He's calling Thomas while he's screaming like he's in a terror movie

Kid he ain't gonna look at no minor, he definitely will be like:

Please save him 😭

ACTUALLY 😭😭😭😭

He already had problems with unwanted crushes

which i mean look at him 😳

If i was to be saved and his handsome face is the first thing i see ill be straight up thinking I'm in heaven bro 💀

Like bro will be holding my heart and I'll bre like "What are we?"

Like, a bit rude for him start to yell saying "WHY ARE YOU AWAKE?" and "QUICK, SEDATE HER!" like damn, okay boo chill😔✊🏽

But Zayne have one specific thing,

He doesn't attend to teenagers

I mean yes, he sometimes work on the pedriatic area, but he personally asks to Greyson to deal with the patients around the age of 12-17

But sometimes, shit hits the fan, wanderers show up and when he checks the next patient and he sees their age he's like:

No, just, NO.

It just happened once.

And it was enough 💀

Especially because his job requires a certain charisma, and a lot of patiency.

And people tend to think that only woman suffers with harassement.

And if you're a man, you should not be a "wuss" and be gratefull to have woman looking your way.

And if it's a kid, people take even less serious 💀

So you can guess how much of a hostage situation he was in, when there was this 14 year-old girl, following him around, hugging his waits and calling him "Oppa 🥹🥹"

Just to think about it he shivers uncomfortably 😣

God bless Yvone for noticing and ACTUALLY taking him serious, when he told her, that he was uncomfortable, and he didn't know what to do.

The little girl didn't like her, but Yvone could't care less, she got bills to pay 🙄✋🏽

Now she wards away little girls that get too excited over doctors, she's the "mean evil bitch" but she's the hero for all the young doctors that are in these though situation, and the doctors in response are always ready to play boyfriend or scare away some over excited male patients that bother the nurses.

So yeah fellas hope yall laughed cuz i thought it was hilarious as heck 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Take care! And don't let weird kids creep you out 🥰

Now please someone, close the gates from this game THE KIDS ARE IN THE GODDAMN CLUB AAAAAAAAAAAA😭😭😭😭😭

[anxiousgoddest]

Me to the LADS when they have the audacity to points in a literal competitive game🤡🤡🤡 but I'm actually personally good at kitty cards. Sometimes after reducing their 24 points to 2 and doubling mine, I'm so grateful a screen, time and space protects me😫🙏🏽 Like ignore how civilised Rafayel acts in the game, I know he'd drown me after I wipe out his cats😔

I humbly, reverently and kindly request at the feet of the Most Anxious Goddest, crack fic about the LIs and MC taking kitty cards way too seriously when they win or lose🙇🏽‍♀️🙇🏽‍♀️🙇🏽‍♀️🙇🏽‍♀️

Sistah you stronger than me cuz I don't even play kitty cards anymore 😭😭😭 I just get the claw machine and skip the kitty cards idc if I only get 75 the limit of chocolate is 1800 anyways 😭😭😭😭😭😭

BUT WE CHILLING IM SORRY POOKIE FOR TAKING SO LONG 😭😭

The love and deepspace Bois when they have the AUDACITY to win the kitty cards 🙄🙄✋🏽

Tags: Crack fic, violence against handsome men idc sue me.

Pairing: Zayne, Rafayel, Xavier and Sylus.

Zayne

Listen

We all know he's a dear 🥹🫶🏽

BUT THAT'S NOT ENOUGH 👹👹👹👹👹👹

HOW DOES HE WIN EVEN THO HE SWITCHED CARDS????

You watch in horror as you see Zayne obliterating your most high score kitty like he hates animals and broooooo😭😭😭

"I thought you loved me bro" you say and Zayne rolls his eyes "It's not my fault, also I allowed you to switch 3 times this round dear-" "I want a divorce."

He just looks at you like 👁👄👁

Because his brain first went "excuse you?" And then went "Wait are we married?" And he went "No we aren't" and then finally his brows furrowed because how dare you to even think about divorcing him? Doesn't matter if you're not married you can't divorce him 🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨.

And when you get up yelling that you will have the guard of the cat that's the moment he found himself speaking up cuz NU UH AIN'T NO WAY YOU'RE GETTING MISTER MOUSTACHE 😠😠😠😠😠

You two basically argue about divorce and the people at the cat caffe are confused because they don't see a ring on your guys fingers and scared because 😭😭😭😭 what's going on?? 😭😭😭

You two leave huffing in annoyance and go to the local bakery shop because you guys still wanted the new pistachio cake but you two were still mad so you two were just:

😠🍰🤨

And then you two went home with more cake.

And just said "Good night 😠" "Good night you too sleep well 😠"

"I love you 😠"

"I love you more 😠"

"OMG ZAYNE DUDEEE"

You'll start chocking him at 21:14. You still don't know how you ended up getting cream pied at 01:22 😔✊🏽

BUT YOU STILL MAD HE ALWAYS BE WINNING 👹👹👹👹👹

Xavier

You remember the time that your little boy was still new at the game 😮‍💨

So young so pure 🥺🥺

So you took his innocence by defeating his ass countless times cuz nothing better than getting yo ass whooped by life 😋😋😋😋😋😋😋

BUT AYOOOOOOO 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

HOW CAN YOU EVEN SCORE 50 POINTS IN THIS GAME?????💀💀

EVEN THE WORKERS WERE WATCHING GIVING HIM PRAISES AND SHI LIKE DAMN YALL PAUSE 😭😭😭😭😭😭

So everybody gangsta until you pull ya Glock on the table to show Lickon the real incident 👹

And Xavier just went:

THE WAY EVERBODY LEFT LIKE 😳🏃🏽‍♂️🏃🏽‍♂️🏃🏽‍♂️💨💨

"Okay listen up buttercup"

"👁👄👁"

"I either win. Or everybody loses capitche?"

Bro was flabbergasted fr

But also low-key aroused cuz damn she crazy crazy fr fr 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽😫

Anyways he ain't Jesus bitch so like you obviously lost 🤣

You didn't know that bitch could run so fast but he can and the moment he placed the last kitty card he was already standing up to run.

Hop on the ship, Jeremiah. We gotta go 🙎🏻 🚀 🏃🏼‍♂️💨

Rafayel

Usually you win and Rafayel is the whiny bitch, and you know game is game bestie lmaaao🫰🏼🫰🏼

But like

'u'

Excuse you????

EXCUSE YOU????

Not even he was believing that he was winning 😭😭

(And he usually loses on purpose, but he won't tell you that cuz you look like a possessed demon and he's low-key scared 😭)

"BRO HOW ARE YOU EVEN WINNING??"

"Baby, I don't know, I swear, maybe luck is not on your side today?"

And hearing his words he looks so gentle and nice, until you look up and see his face like:

👁👄👁

You jump over the table, and the workers outside perk up when they hear high-pitched screams, but when they see Rafayel being dragged away like

They come to realize that they are not payed enough for this so they just pray for that guy

#RipThatFishyEyyyyy 😔🙏🏽

Sylus

You were enjoying the sight of seeing the big evil lord of Underworld being surrounded by pink and kitties and how his aesthetic made him pop out so much like an alien 😂😂😂😂

But what you didn't expect is that he would be actually good at it??? 🤡🤡🤡

And he said it was his first time too like? 🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨

So when he defeated you for the fourth time that afternoon he HAD to open his DUMBASS MOUTH to spit shit

"Well well well, I guess our little hunter is not as lucky as we thought, tsk tsk what shame huh?"

Bro

Ah naur bro we handing a bitch over

"Hey, darling, what are you doing?"

"Hey Hey Hey put that down now, behave."

"DO NOT" *screams like a Lil girl*

The state bro was found in after hanging out with the girl obsessed with kitty cards 😔😔😔😔🙏🏽

Fellas I hope y'all have enjoyed sorry for taking so long again I just kept procrastinating and constantly forgetting it 😭😭😭

[anxiousgoddest]

i love the l&ds men but if any of them tried to wake me up or touch my food, i would genuinely get violent🫶😍

keep yo musty ahh hands to yourself my man, idk where they’ve been or what they’ve touched🫶😍

POOKIE I'M SO SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG! 😭😭😭😭 college was killing me and I was too excited for a certain Halloween project hehe BUT DO NOT FRET BECAUSE HERE IT IS:

Tags: Crackfic,

Pairing: Xavier, Zayne, Rafayel, Sylus and MC (u).

words:1.5k

Pookie, listen.

Sharing is caring okay?

and I'll tell you more

he WILL get away with eating the leftovers

sorry I don't make the rules 😞🖐🏼

no cuz just look at HIM 👇🏼

yeah but unless you're like me

you will definitely fall for it every time

but if u me

and I am u

well then it's just

you two be rolling on the floor over some hot pot leftover

he will win

you will get mad

and he will fart under the sheets

"WHY EAT IT IF YOUR STOMACH GET UPSET?" "But, babe 🥺" "STINKY ☝🏼☝🏼☝🏼"

"No regrets..."

"I EFFING HEARD THAT SIR"

*Toot* "BRUHHHHH"

You the one stealing bro bfr

At some degree he even let's you because he loves seeing your mouth full while trying to look innocent

(This is u btw, u rat👇🏼)

and I'll tell u more

he definitely does this to his veggies

yeah you gotta eat his carrots, no he doesn't care bestie.

ofc that doesn't apply to sweets cuz he will INHALE them like he's freaking Kirby.

And he will eat yo candies too and say that you're eating too much sweets and he's just helping you out.

then proceed to roll out of the convo like:

He is that girl 💅🏼💅🏼💅🏼

That will choose something fancy and be disappointed

and honestly, it's not his fault

HOW CAN ANYONE RUIN SOME SALAD AND EGGS???

AND WHY DID THAT COST 43 DOLLARS????

JUST CUZ IT SAID IT WAS DIET? A DIET SALAD.

will look at yo fat hamburger like:

don't even try to call the police pookie

he will nag the SHIT out of you

and just nag because last time he tried to steal yo food... was traumatic, to say the least.

He had it coming 😤

truly, we all know he's rich

has money enough to buy anything you want to eat

but nothing better than using his powers and taking whatever is in your hands and eating in front of you, according to him you look funny

(this u btw)

he just likes to eat yo shit in front of you to assert dominance that ball-sucking asshole

but do not fret

put laxatives in yo food pookie 😀

do it 😀

Do. It 😀

Trust you me, there will be nothing better than seeing THE leader of Onichynus running because he farted and pooped

Sharted, if I may 🙂☝🏼

Goofy ahh looking bish look at him running now

and you know what?

he never does it again

he's proud but he won't say

He won't take the chance that he might end up revealing that he had to throw his dress pants again.

he won't forget that tho bestie

💀

Fellas so that's it for today! Thank you for reading! reblog if u want or wtv idk hope I mad u laugh tho! 👌🏼

[anxiousgoddest]

Fellas, once again, I ask your aid to denounce @ aeyumiicore for stealing other people's work.

It might not seem important, it might not affect you, but if you're one of the many who has written through your life fanfiction over one of your personal fixation I believe you can feel the anger when seeing someone having their work, their time, and their whole personality stolen.

All I ask is for you guys to reblog this. Let's do our best to maintain this fanbase clean and healthy for us, and for future players who might even become our colleagues and friends in fanfiction.

I won't write too much, I'll just drop their video screen I did.

Please be aware that this might happen to your work or one of your friends' work! Spread awareness!!

Don't forget to support the real writer, too! @aeyumicore ✊🏽 (love you, pookie, please rest).