I don’t know what this is. I don’t know where they are. It takes place post wizards because I wanted to address Douxie’s emotional issues and I wanted to cry. I successfully made myself cry, let me know if I get you too. (Note: Archie and Douxie are a little out of character but we really only saw them with other people or in the middle of something pressing(that I can think of). I think that after hundreds of years together, they’d let themselves be more vulnerable when it’s just the two of them.)
Warning: Douxie’s negative self image/self worth(not really sure how to tag for that but it’s potentially upsetting)
“Douxie,” Archie said softly from where he was curled up in Douxie’s lap. “I know you’re grieving and I know that you had to put your feelings on hold when it happened to save the world.”
“But?” Douxie replied listlessly, running his hands through Archie’s fur.
“You’re going to have to let him go eventually, you know that, right?”
Douxie took a shaky breath, his hands coming to a trembling stop on Archie’s head.
“I can’t,” he choked out.
“No, you don’t understand,” Douxie spat.
“He took me in too,” Archie reminded him gently. “He protected you when I couldn’t. I owe him everything too.”
“No!” Douxie snarled. “No, you don’t understand! I can’t stop greiving him because if I do, I’ll never forgive him!”
“I hate him,” Douxie hissed, his fingers curling roughly into Archie’s fur. Archie swallowed a wince. “I hate him, Arch.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “He taught me a lot: how to persevere, how to do magic, how to hate myself...”
“You know he never wanted that.”
“Can you stop defending him?” Douxie shouted. Archie flinched as Douxie’s grip on him became painful.
Douxie’s eyes flew open and he jerked his hands back like he’d been burned, scrambling back away from Archie.
“Sorry, sorry, I’m sorry,” he stammered, holding his hands to his chest where they couldn’t hurt anyone.
“Alright, come here,” Archie said, jumping into the sky with a puff of smoke to transform into a dragon. He flew over to Douxie and nudged his head until Douxie made his way over to his bed and sat down. Archie settled back into Douxie’s lap and back into a cat, poking Douxie’s hands until he started petting him again.
“Why didn’t you talk to me?” Archie asked.
“You always spoke as highly of Merlin as I did,” Douxie mumbled. “I didn’t think you’d want to hear it.”
Archie sighed. “I cared about Merlin because I thought he was doing for you what I couldn’t. I thought he was helping you in ways that I couldn’t. If I’d known he was hurting you? I would have killed him myself.”
“Don’t,” Douxie muttered. “I did care about him. I just hated him too. I wanted him to love me so bad and I could never figure out why I wasn’t good enough for him to love me. I tried everything to be better, to get him to look at me with pride if not love. He never did. Not until the end.”
“You were always enough,” Archie hissed. “You were always enough and he should have loved you from the beginning. I never said anything because I thought he made you happy.” Archie stopped and pulled his head back to look Douxie in the eyes. Douxie looked away.
“Hisirdoux Casperan, you look at me right now,” Archie snarled. “You always deserved love and I am sorry that I didn’t make sure you knew that.”
“It’s fine, Arch,” Douxie said with a soft laugh. “I never blamed you. It’s just all catching up with me, you know? At least before I always knew he was coming back. I knew he would give me another chance to earn it.” Archie flattened his ears against his head and snarled at Douxie. “Arch?” Douxie asked tentatively. “You’re kind of scaring me.”
“I’m going to resurrect him so I can kill him myself,” Archie growled. “I’m never going to forgive myself for letting him poison you for as long as he did.” Archie stood up on his back legs and pushed his front paw into Douxie’s chest. “You have never needed to do anything to earn respect and affection. Never.”
Douxie raised his eyebrows and chucked at Archie’s scowl. He lifted his arms and crushed Archie in a tight hug. “Alright, whatever you say.”
“Damn right, whatever I say,” Archie said, his voice muffled against Douxie’s chest. “I love you. I love you and I always have and you have never needed to do anything or be anything other than yourself for that.”
Douxie froze. “I love you too, Archie,” he stuttered. “I love you.”
“I’m sorry,” Archie whispered. “I am so sorry that I ever made you doubt that. You’re my family and I love you, Hisirdoux.”
Douxie’s mouth was trembling and his eyes were hot and damp. “Quit it with my full name, Archibald. You’re going to make me cry.”
“Good,” Archie snapped, his voice as choked up as Douxie’s. “You know I picked this form for you, right? I did want to travel the world, but I mostly wanted to be your familiar. I picked you. Not for your magic or your skills or any usefulness, but because you’re Douxie and I wanted to stay with you and keep you safe.”
“Dammit, Arch,” Douxie whispered after a long moment as the tears welling up in his eyes started to stream down his face. He buried his face in Archie’s shoulder and clutches him for dear life. “Shut up, I already said I love you.”
“And I already said I love you,” Archie replied, his voice miraculously steady for the amount he was crying. “But I’m going to keep saying it in as many ways as I can think of to make sure you don’t forget it ever again.” Archie fell silent for a moment. “I want to be better than him.”
“You already are, Archie. You already are.”
