She had once held them so dearly. From the moment when Solas had shown her how to wander the Fade in her dreams, sleep had become her escape. No matter how heavy the weight of the Inquisition and all that relied on it, she had the comfort and security of her dreams. For a time, she had even taken to napping with Solas, their limbs entwined as they lay in her quarters in Skyhold, and their minds traveled through the Fade.
She had grown accustomed to waking up to his warmth, to his even breathing, and to discussing what they had seen in the Fade. She had also grown used to the intimate moments that would follow.
She had taken to teasing him, stealing what time she could with him. Rushed kisses as she passed the rotunda to see Cullen, moments of breathless giggling as they teased one another in an abandoned hall, only to break away and sprint off when a servant approached their alcove. When none of these were possible, they would meet in the Fade.
When they weren't meeting for more intimate reasons, Solas had introduced her to spirits he knew, and she had made friends of her own with spirits within the Fade.
The first time she had returned to sleep after he left her, she had unwittingly wandered to the Fade in her dreams. A kind spirit had offered to listen to her, and Arianni poured her heart out to it, sharing all of her anger, sadness, and frustration. The spirit, a kind wisp, had stayed with her, sitting nearby as it listened. Arianni hadn't noticed the changes to the spirit as it sat next to her. Face in her hands, she had continued crying, oblivious, until she heard a faint shout.
The voice was faint. She looked up to see Solas running towards her, worry twisting his face, blurring his outline. Just seeing him sent a shot of red-hot fury through her like a lightning bolt.
"Vhenan, you must wake!" He cried out, pointing past her.
Arianni looked around, gasping in horror. The spirit she had been speaking to was no longer sitting quietly next to her. It had gone from having a faint green outline to glowing red, twisting in place. As she watched, it began shrieking, its form growing, pulsating. It suddenly shot towards her.
Arianni turned from it and ran. The danger she was in was not lost on her. She was stopped as a tendril of energy grabbed her, wrapping tightly around her throat and pulling her back. More grabbed her shoulders, her arms, entwining around her, pulling her backwards. She struggled futilely against the grasp of the spirit. their very touch burned, searing her very being. She screamed and thrashed, desperate to escape the pain.
Solas sprinted for her, but he was sluggish, it looked as though he was running through thick mud. The incredible emotions emanating from Arianni, magnified through the spirit was warping the fade around it. Solas struggled forward, arm outstretched. "No!"
As Arianni watched his approach, she reached for him, screaming his name, begging for help.
"MA HALANI!" Arianni screamed as she dropped to her knees.
The spirit pressed against her back, clinging to her, enveloping her. The pain was all consuming, wiping away all thought. Everything she was or had been burned away slowly, painfully. All that was left as she straightened was the anger. The rage became her identity. As she looked at Solas, at the fear and sadness on his face, she felt only fury.
"Vhenan, no," Solas whispered, dropping to his knees. Arianni was gone. What lumbered towards him, claws outstretched, was not his heart.
The weight of his failure upon him, Solas could only wait as the abomination came inexorably closer. It would have been no small matter to wake, to escape, but Solas knew what awaited him in that world, and it would have no more mercy there than here. He would confine himself to this nightmare. As a hand grasped his neck, Solas closed his eyes, accepting this as his final punishment.
