Journal Entry: Magic
I got it! I figured out a way I can use a shield spell on myself! I may not have an innate desire to protect myself, but I bet if I focused I could outwardly do it. If I think and focus on how I need to be safe to keep others safe, maybe that will be a strong enough will to channel energy to and create a shield.
I’ve been practicing on my own, but so far nothing. Maybe it would work better if I was in danger.
On the healing front I’ve had...mixed results to say the least. In the past I’ve healed an angel and a Furian without issue. They’re not human and heal rapidly anyway, but I thought for practice they’d be perfect. BUT recently I tried healing a metahuman and while it did close up his giant wound quite a bit, I wasn’t able to heal him completely and the process burned him. Not ideal results.
After such a varied yet small sample size I can’t even begin to guess what happened. Even the Scarlet Spider-metahuman-himself postulated that it could have been his metahuman biology or radiated blood. I’ll need to keep practicing. Hopefully that doesn’t mean causing anyone else any more pain. Kinda the opposite of what I want...
Starscream gave me an idea recently when I told him I liked the feel of dark energon. Since it contains near-limitless chaos, he said that made sense, but he wondered if I could do anything with it, like drain it. I never thought of trying that before! It’d be really cool and really useful if I could learn how to direct disorder, either from one place, object, or even person to another, or maybe even into myself to make myself stronger.
I haven’t started practicing this yet, but I will soon. If I mess up, it could be pretty dangerous.