Carnival of Aros: Round-up March 2021
I would like to thank everyone who participated in the March 2021 Carnival of Aros on the theme of Intersectionality and Inclusivity. I am grateful and humbled that people took the time to share their thoughts and experiences. I learned a lot by reading about their experiences, and I hope the rest of the community can be made better by these. Below is the list of submissions.
aroaceingit (she/they) wrote about how her/their aromanticism intersects with her/their disabilities and how this can make it hard to function. She/they expresses, “it’s also very hard for me to picture any future that doesn’t have me feeling and functioning the way I do now. And for that reason, I am afraid to be alone.”
Isaac (he) at Mundo Heterogéneo discusses a couple of intersectionalities, such as cultural background, gender identity, and relationship cardinality. He ends with expressing, “What I expect from a community about its intersections is to follow the Latin proverb “primum non nocere,” first not to harm.”
Temple Dragon (they/them) wrote about disability inclusion. They describe ways in which we can improve accessibility and better include those with disabilities. As a call to action, they ask us to “Please keep access features that became widespread during the pandemic going after it’s subsided, and continue to End Ableism.”
Jason W./DerelictSpectre (he/him) shared his experiences in the aro community, specifically that of being Black (and South Asian). He ends with imploring “all nonblack aros and even other members of the LGBTQ+ community to educate themselves on black history, and remember to listen, uplift, support, and protect your fellow black members of the LGBTQ+ community.”
Mesotablar the Apathetic Echidna (she/her) discusses how US culture has been dominating aromantic spaces and how this can affect how content and resources are shaped. She leaves us with some good questions: “What of the people making discoveries now? people from countries where the framework is not yet established? Will they see these resources as International or American?“
bedlaminthebigtop Part 1 writes about how essential intersectionality is, how POC are an integral part of the community, and that we need to stop conflating the aromantic community with being Western and White. “To all white aro people/organisations: Stop upholding whiteness as the default. That's not a real default, that's all you. It's manufactured. It's white supremacist. Stop making your activism and your resources and your education and your teams white-centric. Stop assuming that the community is white. Stop conceptualising the target audience of aromantic community resources as white. Your whiteness is not universal.”
bedlaminthebigtop Part 2 details how amatonormativity intersects with white supremacy, specifically with regards to selective prohibition vs. promotion of marriage. The numerous ways marriage and amatonormativity are used as a white supremacist tool of oppression and coercion is discussed. “Marriage is, historically and contemporarily, a way to force BIPOC and LGBTQIA+ folks to assimilate into white bourgeois norms of monogamy and gender roles. So go on, keep fucking pretending that intersectionality is optional and marriage will save the LGBTQIA+ community.” As a last point, the absolute necessity of intersectionality is stressed.
I (graces-of-luck; she/ey) wrote about how my Latine heritage intersects with my aromanticism and express how the dominant Whiteness in the aromantic community has affected the development of my aromantic identity. “It’s been a process for me to discover what a Latine version of my aromanticism would be. I don’t know yet what that is, to be honest.” I hope for more dialogue on intimacy and relationships that are culturally diverse and for more stories from Latine aros.
CharCharChar (they/them) discussed how they are approaching making their local ace and aro group more inclusive and what concrete steps White people can take to do this. They provide some helpful resources and concludes with “Do the thing. Listen. Ask for help. Keep trying.”
Violet (she/they) wrote about how the pandemic has given her/them a lot of time to think, in which she/they questioned not only her/their gender but her/their political beliefs. She/they expressed the importance of solidarity and ended with “It’s time to stop letting our ignorance divide us.“
While there is much room for improvement, I’m inspired by the possibilities of making our aromantic community more inclusive, of lifting each other up as we experience multiple identities, and expanding the meaning and experience of what it is to be aromantic.
April’s Carnival of Aros will be hosted by Constance Bougie. The call for submissions can be found on his/their blog.
