#aromanticissues

[aromantic-nerd]

Hey alloaros, this is for you:

No matter what anyone says, you are an essential part of the aromantic and aspec communities.

You are not a bad person because today’s societal standards demonize sex without romance. There is NOTHING WRONG with experiencing sexual attraction but not romantic. It is real and your experiences deserve to be recognized.

So much activism that I see in the aspec community revolves around aroaces and occasionally, alloaces. This is a reminder to include alloaros in aspec acitivism!! THEY ARE SO VALID, and they deserve to feel seen!!!

[aromantic-nerd]

I posted this on my Instagram account this morning, and wanted to share it here too.

[mayalaen]

mellowwincest replied to your post “In my long-ish post the other day I mentioned that an ex (one of the...”

OHMYGOD I relate to this so hard rn. Like... I lean toward being aro but I don't like to define myself by that just because idk haven't got it figured out yet, but anyway I make it clear to all my partners that I am in no way interested in a romantic relationship and I am currently receiving nonstop texts from a guy who caught feels and I just like... Ugh. I mean maybe I brought it upon myself but I feel your pain! I hope you figure out a solution! Sorry you have to deal with that :/

At the time I was with him I didn’t realize I was aromantic, which is silly because my family saw it even when I was REALLY little. The more romantic he got, the more I just hated it, and I realized it was what I didn’t like about rom-com movies and being with someone.

And I realized that’s why pretty much every relationship I’ve had has fallen apart with this heavy air of me not being enough for them. Hence my breakup song that I play over and over every time is Tonic’s You Wanted More.

I have yet to find someone who can put up with a lack of romance. It’s not even that I won’t do SOME romantic things for my partner, but having them done to me just... I don’t want it. You’d think people would like not working so hard to do stuff for/with me :D

I hear women complaining all the time that all they find is men who want to fuck, then roll over and fall asleep. I STILL HAVEN’T FOUND ONE OF THOSE MEN and the few women I found that were like that -- our personalities didn’t mesh well enough to continue a relationship. It’s like YES please give me the “asshole” guy/girl who smacks you on the ass after sex (with no foreplay) and is snoring before they hit the pillow.

[mayalaen]

The drive-thru chick is so hot I’m surprised I haven’t hit the curb on the way out. I’ve gotten McDonald’s twice in the last three weeks, and both times this chick has been at the second window and she’s so fucking hot that it takes my breath away.

She’s geeky hot. Like with black horn-rimmed glasses and a dorky giggle and she’s awkward and her smile is so adorable I can’t stand it. She takes the time to ask about how I’m doing and is all sweet. I’m sure if there was a long line she wouldn’t do that, but I come at odd times because of work.

I wanna ask her out (I don’t even know if she’s anything besides straight), but I’m so tired of seeing that look in someone’s eyes when they realize I wasn’t kidding about being aromantic. When they experience what it really means and realize they can’t/don’t want to do this. It’s making me kinda gunshy when I’m usually the one who makes the first move. I guess that last one messed me up a little more than I thought it did. Arg.

[mayalaen]

Being aromantic, it’s confusing to me when I get a strong urge to just curl up behind someone I love in bed, just to have that quiet strength and support from somebody who knows me better than my family, who knows the good and the bad, someone who has no reason to stay with me other than the fact that they love me so much they want to be there.

[mayalaen]

I just saw This Post with this dialog:

-Does she love you? -Yes. -Did she say so? -No. -So how do you know? -Well... each time she returns my books, there are flowers inside. -What sort of books do you lend her? -Novels,poetry,books on science,computing... -Does she read them? -Of course she does! -Does she? Have you asked her? -I can see she's underlined the good bits. -Does she want to save mankind too? -Yes. -How do you know? -By the sentences she underlines. -Is that enough to know she wants to save mankind? -Yes.

I’ve never seen the movie, but the dialog got to me.  I feel this accurately represents me in a relationship.  I’m aromantic, and I don’t SAY the mushy stuff or do overly mushy stuff, but I’ll do things for you, I’ll be there for you, and I’m really fucking loyal, and if you pay attention, you’ll see how I feel about you.

I just haven’t found a person yet who is happy with that.

[mayalaen]

royalrowena replied to your post “royalrowena replied to your post “Top 3 movies of all time :)”Omg I...”

80s horror movies were the best, I think. Horror is definitely my favorite genre, and as much as I love reading a sappy Destiel fanfic, I HATE romantic comedies. Makes no sense, lol.

Yeah, I’ll read REALLY romantic fanfic and not even flinch.  Considering I not only hate romantic comedies, I’m aromantic myself, yeah, I find that odd, but I just go with it.  If I like it, I like it :D

The problem with most romantic comedies (for me) is they shove the cute down your throat.  It’s over the top and beyond cheesy to the point I feel like screaming “You can’t just FORCE me to like everyone in this movie!”

There’s cute jokes, cute things happening, cute people with no flaws or cute flaws, and it always ends up happy and unrealistic and I’m left feeling... thrown by the whole experience.  It kinda feels like when people wanna show you pictures of their kids and... okay I went and posted the video because it’s so perfect - Family Guy Episode Look at My Kids

Fanfic doesn’t shove the cute down your throat unless the fic is meant to be that way.