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did you know i'm on artfight?

on the day your guardian angel tells you about god, you wake up from a nightmare, covered in sweat, shoulders heavy with the weight of wings you never had. your guardian angel perches on the footboard of your bed, shuffling its feet underneath itself in that way that birds do.

it turns its head to the side to look at you with one small eye. it asks without words (always without words, it cannot speak and does not even sing) if you're all right.

you're okay, now that you're awake. it wasn't one of the nightmares that sticks with you. already the memories are fading. the memories of trying to fly away, wings beating the air, straining against ropes that wouldn't be able to hold you unless you were weakened by the fire that scorched your feathers.

usually, if you have wings in your dreams, it's not a nightmare. usually, if you have wings in your dreams, you stretch them out with ease and coast just below the clouds, where nothing on the ground can reach you.

tonight was different. you had wings, but it was a nightmare. you couldn't get off the ground. not when you were on fire, tied down, unable to muster that explosive burst of energy to escape to the skies.

you think about thanking your guardian angel. the words don't leave your mouth. you know you're alone in your room.

your guardian angel bobs its ruffed head, because you don't need to speak for it to understand. it's your guardian angel, after all.

it fluffs its feathers and you know, in that sudden way that means it told you something without words, that god would consider a death like that a martyrdom.

you think about how it's never told you anything about god before, and then you know that's because it doesn't think you could really understand a god that isn't yours.

you wonder why god wouldn't belong to you, and it turns its head to look at you with the other eye, and you understand that god belongs to birds, not to humans. or at least the god that serves your guardian angel. it's never even met a human god and would certainly never trust one.

you think about how it's supposed to be the other way around, that angels are supposed to serve god.

that must be a human rule.

that thought is not yours.

if you are not a bird, how could a death tied to the ground, wings blazing like a phoenix gone horribly wrong, be a martyrdom? the thought barely enters your mind before you know that god would make you a saint if your guardian angel put in a good word for you. probably. it's been a little while since your guardian angel has talked to god. it doesn't get to talk with god if it's not guarding a bird. you're out of god's wheelhouse, and all.

you think about how it's been a couple of years since your guardian angel first came to you. is that a long time to not talk to god, or the blink of an eye to an angel like it?

you know it's worth it for a friend, which doesn't answer your question. you know your guardian angel does not intend to answer your question. you ask another.

your guardian angel stands up on its heavy feet, stretching its wings, barred brown and grey, out for balance. it drums them against the still and muggy air of your bedroom in mid-august. it's silent, but you know what it would sound like if it was perched on a fallen tree.

the two of you could not be friends if it had never come to guard you.

why did it choose you over god?

it dreams of soaring, too.

#soup.en #art.soup #divinity #unreality

Part One: poked mafia (11313 words) by Flitting_hummingbird, souplover13 Chapters: 6/? Fandom: Real Person Fiction Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Our various and sundry beautiful mutuals, Original Characters, Tumblr User snowychicken, Tumblr User ghost-in-a-cup, Tumblr User homoeroticjunoincident, Tumblr User atyourperil, Tumblr User fearforthestorm, I Love Rock And Roll (Original Pokémon Character), Candace (Original Pokémon Character), Tumblr User demigod-of-the-agni, Tumblr User datfearlessfangirl, Tumblr User ghastspidergwen, Tumblr User crimson-rots, Tumblr User just-wublrful, Tumblr User lobotomy-maybe-bestie, Tumblr User identityarchitect, Tumblr User souplover13 Additional Tags: no beta we die like [spoilers redacted], Talent agency, Alternate Universe - Pokemon Fusion, Inspired by Tumblr, Inspired by Fanfiction, Other Additional Tags to Be Added Series: Part 1 of BOOB: Business Operation Of Brilliance Summary:

In which we are introduced to a few very important characters, the PokeMafia, and of course, the Business Operation Of Brilliance (aka BOOB).

#soup.rpf #art.soup #soup.en #apparently in order for people to read your rpf you need to post it? crazy if true

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Stardew Valley (Video Game) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Penny/Sam (Stardew Valley) Characters: Sam (Stardew Valley) Additional Tags: transfeminine character, Prophetic Dreams, Genderqueer Sam (Stardew Valley), Character's egg has not cracked Summary:

Sam is caught between the girl he's basically dating in real life and the girl who's everywhere in his dreams.

#art.soup #shoutout to FAE for being my most consistent supporter love you girliepop #anyway um. i saw a blond 'man' and went i know how to rid the world of one little bit of evil: estrogen

Third of three books i bound this weekend, and my first actual ficbinding! act one of Break Me Like a Pattern by @thelibrarybat over on the old Archive of our Own.

Almost three years ago - 1039 days ago, if anyone's counting - I asked if I could use this masterpiece as my first attempt at ficbinding. This was the third fic I'd ever commented on and I had just started to get into bookbinding. It was still being written and released when I asked about binding it. By the time it ended, it was a hefty 215k words, which is more than the first four books of Narnia combined, or slightly more than Crime and Punishment or Moby Dick.

As somebody who, to this day, has only ever done Japanese Stab Binding, you can imagine I was not eager to try getting my needle through a six-centimeter stack of paper as a beginner. Also, while the Archive is ideal for digital works, the pdf versions are lacking a certain polish, and it takes a while to typeset something of this size.

To make an already long story slightly shorter, I've spent the last three years deciding how I want to break up this masterpiece. I toyed with the idea of forty single-chapter volumes, which eventually led me to the idea of printing alternating chapters on different colours of paper. The three-act structure which TheLibraryBat so kindly pointed out in the author notes was my saving grace, allowing me to create a trilogy of novels.

To bypass the only slightly less intimidating two-centimeter stack of paper that makes up Act One, I tried something I've never tried before: I bound four-chapter sections and glued them together, an extremely terrifying experience as I wanted to avoid gluing any pages shut. Luckily, the book survived, and while you'd never mistake it for a "real book," I like its handmade charm and am extremely proud of it. I've got no idea when Acts Two and Three might expect to land on my bookshelf, but you can be sure that it won't be another three years.

#soup.en #art.soup #i've talked already about how surreal it is to hold it in my hands and be able to turn its pages #it's just such a symbol of my creative growth i think. me when i can tangibly experience progress

ICARUS: a web weave / zine by souplover13

when i get a chance to print & bind it, i'll make another post with the zine and link it here.

image IDs in alt text including citation by appearance. background and colour of text is formatted by source (ie, all comic-style text is from Fun Home by Alison Bechdel, the only tumblr post i used was by @crimsonservbot, the Mashrou' Leila song lyrics are all taken from the same promotional image, etc) The last image is the title page, which contains no new information or pictures, and has all sources cited completely in a very long list. There is nothing after that image.

#soup.en #art.soup #web weave #i did all the design in like three hours and then it took me a full day to do the image descriptions to my satisfaction #anyway. 'oh soup is there a coherent theme to this?' NOPE. icarus is acrobatics he is happiness he is foolishness he is son he is failure h #is disappointment he is wasted potential he is hope. he's everything to me. hope that helps.#also. ahab saw it first <3 if you want previews of my creative work all you have to do is become one of my best friends and then quit tumbl

Chapters: 3/4 Fandom: Stardew Valley (Video Game) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Penny/Sam (Stardew Valley), Abigail & Sam & Sebastian (Stardew Valley), Eventual Abigail/Sebastian (Stardew Valley), Abigail & Sam (Stardew Valley) Characters: Sam (Stardew Valley), Penny (Stardew Valley), Abigail (Stardew Valley), Sebastian (Stardew Valley), Vaguely Outlined Original Characters Additional Tags: transfeminine character, Prophetic Dreams, Genderqueer Sam (Stardew Valley), Emotional Constipation, Romantic Fluff, pov character has a panic attack, character's egg cracks during this story, Angst Summary:

Sam has a girlfriend and a dream girl. They are not the same woman. Someday, something will need to be done.

#soup.en #art.soup #those of you who remember me talking about a fanfiction so transgender it made me physically nauseated... it's HERE!#stardew valley #<- proud enough to maintag. yep.

the thing about getting out of your hometown is that not everybody will do it. some of your friends will stay there, possibly forever. some of your friends will never get to experience the world outside the settlement you grew up in. they will visit the outside world but they will not come to know it the way you do.

the first friend you ever made on your own still lives with their parents. their boyfriend lives in the city but they will never be able to afford to move out there. visiting is all they ever do. they must always come home to the same house they have known all their life.

the thing about getting out of your hometown is that even the people who do get out, won't get out completely. they will shine out there in the world and still be pulled back constantly, tethered to a place they should leave in ways you won't be able to predict.

your best friend is so close to freedom. there is just one last part of her childhood that she needs to shed if she is going to blossom to her full potential. if she could just do it, she could leave you all behind and go on to wonderful things beyond anyone's imagination.

the thing about getting out of your hometown is that you will come back to visit and everything will be the same. some of it will change but the bones will still be there. the more things change, the more they stay the same.

you will walk into your first friend's house and their parents will greet you and the only sign that any time has passed will be a touch of grey in their hair. the corner store will still be selling the same off-brand candy even if the cashier on duty today is younger than you.

the thing about getting out of your hometown is that you never wanted to leave in the first place, but you needed to, and now you want to come back and you can't. because now that you've gotten your taste of the outside world you can't leave it behind.

you have left it behind and you can never come back, not really. nothing has changed and everything has changed. it's a blessing and a curse, the ability to leave.

#soup.en #art.soup