Tomorrow at 2pm I have the final call with my rheumatologists nurse to say if I can finally start treatment. I’m so nervous.
19th May, 3 weeks ago today, I called my rheumatologists secutary as I had just seemed to be deteriorating more and tramadol had left me unable to wee nearly ending me up being admitted to hospital. My rheumy called back within 2 hours and said to me that the risk of what I am taking at the moment medication wise is now no longer higher than starting treatment, so he wanted to get me started on the treatment. I immediately had a panic attack from pure relief of waiting for 9 months, getting 1 week away from treatment in April and it being stopped due to corona and not knowing when I would get it. I couldn't stop crying (happy tears!) for days and tbh Im still in pure shock as I really didn't expect him to say you can now have treatment!
26th May I had a call with his nurse first so she could talk me through the details of the treatment like how to take the doses and work this up to a full dosage along with the side effects, how to manage them and what to do if I fell poorly or got infections. All I needed to do now was have some blood tests done and arrange for the results to be sent to over to them before they say I can start (I travel over an hour to see my rheumy, he isn't at my local hospital)
2nd June I had my blood tests done. It was actually the 1st time I have been outside since my last specialist appointment on 3rd March and then having to shield due to corona, it was so weird! I had to call from car to ‘check in’ and tell them what car I was in, when they're ready for you they come out with every single piece of PPE you have ever seen and get you from the car! every seat in the surgery was taped with huge X marks in order for you not to sit down and everything in the rooms had been taken out.
Tomorrow, 10th June, at 2pm I have a phone call from the nurse who will hopefully give me the go ahead to start the treatment! I even had the tablets ready to go.
I always feel SO ridcuously nervous before appointments as I’m so used to being told I’m fine and everything is in my head.. Although this isn't the case anymore as I've found this amazing specialist, he diagnosed me straight away and has never stopped testing me for things to be sure on what is wrong with me, he will go to the end of the earth to do everything, however that fear ad feeling of 10 years waiting for someone to believe me never goes away.
Tonight could be the las night before I start treatment, I feel anxious but im also so anxious.
