#asilkenspiider

[techmaestro]

She hesitated, gaze flicking between his and then to the marker. A small, despondent smirk tracing on her lips as she doodled. Around the arc-reactor, thick, bold letters spelled out a thought, maybe even a truth. 'THE GUILT OF A GREAT MAN.'

He peered down at his chest for a long moment, then back to her. For another long beat there was silence, and then he sighed, shaking his head. “You know, I was hoping for something a little less depressing.”

[steverogers-soldier-blog]

Loss

Steve sat in a pew in the empty church, his head down and wiping away hot tears of regret and sorrow.

He wasn’t weeping for the present, for the 95 year old woman who would have been horrified by her increasing mental deterioration, if she’d been aware of it. No, he was mourning what might have been and all the years he’d missed.

He was mourning the Peggy of World War 2. The first woman he’d ever loved, and his friend, even before he was Captain America.

She’d never stopped being his friend, even when his love for her had changed to another kind of love, even when the visits where they could really talk had become fewer and fewer.

He mourned that Peggy, too, but he’d also seen the struggle of her last months, the fear and reliving of past sorrows that her mental condition had caused, the physical pain that went with great age and a body that was just plain worn out--but God, he was going to miss her. He was going to miss her so much....

Steve took a deep, shaky breath, wiped his eyes again, and stood, readying himself for the interment.

As he turned to rejoin Peggy’s many friends and acquaintances, as well as those who were simply here out of respect, he saw Natasha walking up the aisle toward him.

That was unexpected.

@asilkenspiider