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Dear plumbers
Please come collect your angry turtle man. He broke into my observatory and refuses to leave. He is scaring the luma’s.
ps: Tell Peach I will be coming over later tonight once this is dealt with and bringing a gift.
-Your’s Truly, Antiproshipper Princess Rosalina
Let me guess, he's there to steal your hot sauce again? We'll be there in a few.
And we'll make sure to tell Peach once we get back!
Dear Luigi, How many raccoons can fit in your ass From, Nosey Anon
ZERO??? WHO SHOVES RACCOONS UP THEIR ASS? WHY ASK SUCH A QUESTION?
Hey, Mario! Sorry to bother you right now, but someone's been harassing me and Tamia on our blog
I just wanted to check with you, if you want I can ask Tamia to stop sending you guys gifts? She'll leave you alone if you ask, she doesn't want to make you uncomfortable.
It sucks that you and Tamia are being harassed, and I hope that the issue gets solved in a timely manner.
I'm going to be frank with you, most people sending us anything to our home address makes us extremely uncomfortable and a little scared. We'd deeply appreciate it if Tamia, and any fans of that matter, use our P.O box that is located in Toad Town's Postal Office instead of sending things to our actual address. Our box is the one decorated with all the Mario merch, and all items get delivered to us on a weekly basis! Just make sure to follow the rules posted on the box, I'll list them down below just in case the font is hard to read!
Do not send any weapons or illegal substances.
No sending food stuffs, it will expire or be busted open by the time it gets to us and we'll have to throw all the packages out.
Nothing that can be seen as a romantic gesture. It makes us uncomfortable.
Nothing, for a lack of better words, that is made to sexually pleasure a person. We don't know if it has already been used (if it has that's fucking gross) or tampered with in any way.
No ticktacks, candies, or anything that is pill shaped.
No keepsake charms made out of your own or other people's body parts... You know who you are.
Having people outside of a very specific few friends know our address is a massive safety issue, especially considering our popularity and Luigi's SG.
Can I be your Mrs. Mario?
First of all... My last name isn't Mario, it's Albano. Secondly, read the blog rules before you try to put a ring on it, you heathen.
Heyyy, I'm sorry to bother you two with this, but have any of you seen Tamia lately?
No, I've never seen her in person. And before you ask , no I'm not gonna go looking for her. I am dealing with something much more urgent at the moment and I'm not even in the Mushroom Kingdom at the moment.
What dynamic do you think is the most dangerous when feral?
Omegas.
For Luigi: Would you like this Hello Kitty plushie I bought today?? :D
That's a pretty cute plushie! I already got 4 of them, but I don’t mind having a 5th. It'd have to go in quarantine until your scent isn't on it anymore before you send it. Mario will throw it away if it smells like you.
Also, I suggest staying at a friend's house for a while. Or at least go to a hotel.
Hello!! I brought spaghetti
I saw that it was said that Bowser is interdynamic, does that give him any health issues?
Also for Luigi: I hope they made lots of Spaghetti!
Bowser seems to be relatively fine physically, the only issue he has is that he struggles with his emotions and instincts A LOT which causes him to do batshit insane thing like try to take over the moon.... And succeed for a whole 5 hours.
He's getting better about it (thank god) and that only happens once a month. He normally just barges into the castle and loudly vents to Peach about how being spikey sucks because he can't sleep on water beds or use pool floaties now. He use to drag her to his castle and keep her hostage so he could vent, then he learned that he could... just come over.
