#asoue adjacent

[lookalivefive]

Had a chat with one of my friends last night and he told me the story of when he tried to help his mum clean their crockery cabinet when he was a kid. He climbed up onto it to reach the upper cupboards, and it pulled the whole thing down on top of him. He was fine, the good china was not. In the cabinet was a gold plated tea service that his parents got as a wedding gift. Guess what the only thing that survived was? That’s right, the sugar bowl.

[last-quiet-place]

I wanna be a professional arsonist

[lookalivefive]

Had my first Covid vaccine today. I got directed to my seat and told the consultant would be by in a few minutes and I took my phone out to play solitaire while I waited. About a minute later I hear a softly spoken “good morning” and I look up to see the kindest looking man I have ever met. And then AND THEN he says “My name’s Bertrand, can I just ask you a few questions about your health?” And I think I died a little.

[lookalivefive]

Gothic Hooded Bat Irregular Long Dress by Punk Rave

[lookalivefive]

making tea at work, realising I left my tea at home this morning, and adding two sugars to their awful cheap stuff to make it palatable.

Me internally: oh no

Taking my tea to the break room, putting it down on the table and accidentally leaving a ring on it because we have no coasters.

Me quietly: oh no

Forgetting about my tea whilst eating lunch and finding it has gone cold. I have tepid, sweet tea and a stain on the table.

Me, too loud for a shared space: OH NO

[littlestsnicket]

[littlestsnicket]

realized we have an ice machine at work. it’s ice tea time. unsweetened black tea over ice!

[lookalivefive]

He literally is an arsonist pretending to be a firefighter

Ian Hislop, Have I Got News For You, 28/05/2021