The World Is Safe Here

Taz/Percy | 21 | ASOUE sideblog | follows back as @whyispickingausernamesohard | icon by me

[fanonical]

do you ever think about the fact that sunny baudelaire had a kill count before she was talking in full sentences

[fanonical]

everyone in the asoue world is an orphan. why do people choose to have parents they know they're gonna die tragically young

okay i meant to write 'have kids' there but fuck it. why do people choose to have parents. so irresponsible

[kuttithevangu]

Schism today queen

[wrongitsablog]

if you loveeeee the horrible men of ASOUE but won't even give characters like esme or georgina a chance, i do not trust you for a second. i'm not saying they have to be your favorite but to idolize one and hate the other is suspicious!

[clqrkkent]

I’m fine. I can walk. You can’t. Look. Darling, you can’t walk. Look, look.

[txttletale]

every time i watch some piece of media about how abused children need to put in the work to understand their poor put upon parents i think about the scene in the asoue netflix show where klaus is told his shitty boss had a terrible childhood and says "i'm having a very terrible childhood right now". like damn gottem pack it up we can stop doing this narrative in film and literature now

[aphroditesangel02]

[victorsqualor]

the great thing with asoue is if your fav character is anyone who lemony canonically dislikes you can literally say "well that wouldnt have happened" or "lemonys an unreliable narrator hes just trying to make them look bad" about any piece of canon that u dont like. in this essay i will be explaining why eswell is real and canon and true and how lemony snicket hates lesbians

[thesnicketfile]

“A short woman might be difficult to see on a crowded city street, particularly if she has disguised herself as a mailbox, and people keep putting letters in her mouth.”

— Lemony Snicket, THE GRIM GROTTO

[olivia--caliban]

[jacobsnicket]

happy pride month to sunny baudelaire meeting isadora quagmire and immediately clocking her as gay

[veryfashionabledesigns]

hello snicket fandom is this anything

[wrongitsablog]

[overthestars-and-offtoneverland]

And then some of us are in denial and have that one character who's never done anything wrong. If Lemony can do that, why can't we?

[eyesteeth]

netflix asoue adaptation mini salt copy/pasted from discord

one of the core elements of asoue that developed over time was a "you can't judge people by appearances" narrative where in the first five or so books all the ugly people are evil and the pretty people are good but then carmelita looks cute but is a bully, and esme looks pretty but is evil, and then jacques looks like olaf but is good, and then there are the house of freaks who look ugly but have the potential to be good and are only evil because they've been lead down that path, and then the hook-handed man (who's had his evilness tied to his appearance) is shown to be good (or have the capability for good), and then kit looks tired and unkempt but has a good heart, and then we have the denouments who have different ideologies but are identical (so you really can't tell based off their looks, now can you?) and so all of this primes you to wonder, as you face down the final book, is the man you've thought was the most evil thing in the world from the very beginning, with his crooked teeth and bony face and uncombed hair and unibrow, is he really so evil, or is that just another deceiving appearance?

so to make jacques look nothing like olaf. to not have a unibrow. to be given a fake one, even, an obviously fake one, because a good and noble person would never have an ugly trait like a unibrow is just. frustrating beyond words.

i will always be mad about that damn unibrow.

[fanonical]

count olaf would have an absolutely dogshit but oddly engaging youtube channel

[marzipanandminutiae]

one aspect of Millennial nostalgia I seldom see anyone talk about is having learned certain words and phrases from a certain series of books books- through voracious fable devourment, if you will -and thus being totally unable to hear anyone say "inordinate" and be mentally normal about it, even a score of years later

"score" being a unit of measurement which here means "oh my god I'm 33 years old and I got Pavlov'd by the Lucky Smells Lumbermill"

[strawberrakko]

imagine count olafs title of count isnt even a title, its his first name, and his parents just thought it would be cool to name him that

[overthestars-and-offtoneverland]

You know what? In a universe where a guy is named "Lemony" and everyone, including him, has to just deal with that, why the hell not?