Summary: Steve comes home after two years. And maybe just maybe (Y/N) and he could finally talk about that unspoken thing between them.
Words: 4′247
Warnings: Spoilers for Infinity war
Genere: fluff
A/N: This scene is taken from Infinity war. I don’t remember the exact dialogue so I made up my own. But if you haven’t seen the movie beware of spoilers. As always I’m not from an English speaking country, so excuse my mistakes.
Here a song you can listen to while reading this: Coming Home - Leon Bridges
- Katie xx
(Y/N) - your name
My Masterlist
Your name: submit What is this?
Steve couldn't say he felt good when he stepped foot into the Avengers base. Being here brought up so many memories. A lot had happened here, good and bad. But he mainly remembered the good. And maybe it was because it was where he spent the most time with her. Where their shared memories happened. Sitting here, letting (Y/N) cook dinner for him and Sam. Them watching a crappy movie that Wanda chose. It still felt somehow unreal that he lost all of that. Was (Y/N) here? Maybe she was on a mission, and she wouldn't be there to greet them. He did want to see her. He really did. There was always some unspoken thing between the two. Both of them had feelings for each other. None of them admitted it. And Steve regretted never telling her about his feelings. He was gone for over a year, and she was probably over him by now. A girl like (Y/N) didn't need to wait for him. But he was still hung up on her. He kept her picture in his suit. It helped him stay sane.
"No, Ross, you know they are only Criminals because you had chosen to call him that," he heard Rhodes say.
He was having a conference call with the head of national security. Great. What a great moment for them to come home. But Steve was over it. He had learned in the last years. The American Government wasn't what it used to be. It had betrayed him too much. That is why the name Captain America didn't suit him anymore.
"Mr Secretary," Steve greeted the man.
"You've got some nerves I give you that?" Ross said as he spotted them, and the hologram version of him stepped closer.
"You could use some of that," It was Natasha who answered him. Her eyes fixated Mr. Ross.
She and Ross stared at each other for a split second before he turned to Steve. The mood was tense, but there was even more anger between those two.
"The world is on fire, and you think all is forgiven?" he asked Cap.
Steve frowned. He tried to intimidate him. He was angry that this man had the guts to try to put him down after everything he went through. Steve pushed his shoulders back and stepped down a few steps.
"I'm not looking for forgiveness. And I am way past asking permission. Earth just lost your best defender. So we're here to fight. And if you stand in our way, we'll fight you too," Steve told him sternly.
There was a second of silence, and Ross starred at Steve. He could see the haterade in his eyes.
"Arrest them," Ross said to James.
"All over it!" Rhodey told the man and ended the call.
"That's a court-martial," Rhodes said and raised his shoulders.
A small smile graced Caps lips. At least he could count on him. He wasn't so sure that they would have been welcomed here. He didn't know how it would have been if Tony was here. But apparently, he disappeared.
"Nice to see you, Cap."
They exchanged greetings, Natasha stepped down to hug him and then Rodes told them that they looked like crap. Another laugh from the group. This was good. There was no hate or bad feeling here. At least, that was how Steve interpreted this.
"Yea, well, the hotel rooms weren't exactly 5 stars," Sam added, still half-carrying Vision over his shoulders.
This felt new. Being back here. The rooms even looked different. But Steve still saw it as home. The time he spent here was very important to him; he felt most safe here. This was also where his girl lived.
"I think you look great," a small voice said to their left.
All of them turned around to Bruce, stepping into the room. Steve couldn't believe his eyes. He was back, here and not in space. He saw Nat next to him gasp. Steves' eyes followed their reactions. He didn't know how their relationship would be. Well, they had a certain awkwardness around them, just like he and his girl probably would have.
"Hi Bruce," Nat sounded surprised.
"Nah, Rhodey is right. You look like shit. But hey, now I'm not the only one."
Steves' eyes snapped to the woman that entered the room. She put her batons on the table with force and pointed at herself. There she was. In full tactical gear, with a cut above her brow and dried blood on her clothes. The first thought that crossed his mind was: how stunning she looked. Absolutely beautiful. The second thought was that she was covered in blood. Was it hers? Was she hurt? Did they get her?
She was angry; her walk was more like a strut. Every step was placed with force. But he could spot the slight limp of her left leg.
"(Y/N)," Steve whispered.
Okay, it was more of a gasp, actually. He couldn't believe she was actually here in front of his face. He had dreamed of meeting her again so many times. It was sad that it was under these circumstances. He should have come to find her earlier. He had a lot of regrets and guilt about this. But he never really had the time to dive into those over the years. Life hadn't been easy, and he kept himself distracted well enough.
"Hi Steve," she said and gave him an unsure smile and a little wave.
"Are you okay? You look hurt," Steve said without a thought.
He stepped closer with three quick struts. And suddenly, it felt like old times. Him checking her over after she came back from fights. He just wanted to make sure if she was okay. He didn't care if they were on speaking terms or if making a scene in front of everyone was embarrassing. Steve had waited for way too long to see her. He just needed to touch her, feel her presence and smell her perfume. His hand hovered over her shoulder and then over her eyebrow. His eyes checked her over again for an indication of an injury.
"What happened to you?" he asked and softly placed his large hands on her shoulders.
She looked so small next to him. He had to duck his head to look into her eyes.
"Well, I tried to grab Peter when he was beamed up to a spaceship... that definitely didn't go so well. Fell a few feet. Thank god one of the wizards saved me," she explained and shrugged her shoulders.
He laughed at that. (Y/N)'s explanation didn't make any sense at all. They really needed to catch each other up on their last few hours. But there wasn't actually any time for an extended, sappy reunion. She had raised her hand and tapped his cheek.
"You got a beard. I like it. Lumberjack Steve looks great," she pointed out.
Yes, just like old times. How it used to be. Light teasing and flirting at once. He had missed her so much. Even now, when she gave him a lopsided grin and raised her chin at his next move. It was like she was daring him to kiss her. But he did none of that. There wasn't any time.
"I missed you too," he then mumbled and pulled her into a bone-crushing hug.
She giggled at him. And Steve was sure he beard his friend Sam mumble something like: "Well, this is awkward."
But Steve felt great. Her warmth covered him and pulled him in. He really didn't feel like letting go of her.
°°°
"We really need a plan. Thanos is coming. He came for the time stone, and Vision is going to be next," Bruce said and paced the room.
"Yea, and he brought some nasty friends," (Y/N) mumbled between clenched teeth.
(Y/N) was sitting on a table, and Natasha crouched down in front of her wrapping her swollen ankle. Steve would have loved to do it himself, but he was never good at keeping a cool head when it came to the girl. He wouldn't be able to wrap it up tightly so she could walk in fear of hurting her. The foot wasn't broken, but they weren't sure if she had a broken rib. The cut on her head was luckily not deep and was stitched up quickly. Steve was still worried even though she seemed okay. She had been worse.
"We need reinforcements," Natasha added.
"What about Ant-Man and Clint?" (Y/N) asked as she put her boot back on.
She pulled a face. The action must be causing her pain. Steve wished he could give her some of his healing ability.
"They struck some kind of deal after what happened. Something to do with their families. They are under house arrest," Natasha answered as she got up from her crouched position.
Steve wasn't really sure what that deal was, but he understood. If he had that kind of family, he would have done the same. But he didn't. Steve was a soldier, and this was his job, so he needed to focus on the task and not the girl.
"There is an Ant-Man and a Spider-Man?" Bruce asked.
(Y/N) stifled a laugh. Bruce really needed a lot of catching up. Both sides did. Bruce mentioned that he was the Hulk for over two years and that they had some issues now. Whatever that meant.
"I have thought about this thing in my head a lot, and we need to destroy it, not protect it," Vision said from their right.
He had been quiet for a few minutes and still looked away from the shocked Wanda. She turned around, frowning and whispered his name.
"It is the only way," he said and stepped closer to the young woman.
He touched her cheek and gave her a weak smile. Steve couldn't help but look at them with a certain envy. He wanted something like this. Steve always did. But how could he? The girl Steve wanted sat a few feet from him, still the same but so different. Still too brave for her own good, still too cheeky and still beautiful. But he also saw that she went through some things. Because when he left, not just his life changed, but also hers, and he had forgotten about that. He wasn't sure if she was still the same or if her circumstances changed her as much as they did him. But there it was again, the moment their eyes had met. That unspoken thing. He could feel their tension, the pull between them. As if destiny wanted them to move closer to each other. But there still wasn't any time for that. He needed to focus.
"Vision this could kill you," he said after he broke the eye contact with (Y/N).
Vision let go of Wanda and turned to Cap.
"And we don't trade lives here," Steve added.
It was hypocritical of him to say that. He knew what he did all those years was just like what Viz wanted to do now. But as Steve said, he learned over the years. Sometimes, people, his people, were more important than the world. That was selfish, but the world had taken a lot from him, and it was his right to take things back.
"And when you put that plane down in the ice 70 years ago, how many people did you save? Why don't I get to do the same?" he asked.
The anger in Visions voice surprised him. And yes, he did strike a nerve with that comment.
"What if we don't have to," Bruce said, "What if we can remove the stone?"
All heads turned to the doctor, and a hopeful glint appeared in Wanda's eyes. Steve understood her. If it had been (Y/N), he would never do it. He couldn't.
"And he could be saved? And still, be the same?" she asked.
"Yes, Vision isn't just the stone. He is a combination of things. Of Ultron, Jarvis, Tony and me," he added.
Steve pulled a face when he mentioned Tony. He couldn't help himself. The sadness that overtook his features had to be noticeable.
"Can you do that? Because there isn't a lot of time," Rhody said.
Bruce gave him a long look and shook his head. The fire and passion left his eyes. And Steve realised he needed time, and he needed Tony. None of these things could be given to Bruce.
"Not alone and not here. Without the equipment."
Steve knew a place, and he knew he had to do it. Steve sighed. He didn't want to bring them there and cause T'Challa more trouble. The king had already saved Bucky, and now they needed him to save Vision.
"I may know a place," he said into the silence, "Wakanda."
It was quiet for a second, and six pairs of eyes gave him a confused look. He explained the thing about Bucky. How the princess saved his best friends life and how advanced their technology was. After that, it was quiet again.
"Okay, let's go to Wakanda," (Y/N) said happily and jumped off the table she was sitting on.
The moment her left foot touched the ground, she frowned. She also swayed a bit, and Steve took a cautious step closer. So he could catch her if she fell. Something he did instinctively.
"I'm fine," she mumbled and swatted Steves hand away.
He knew she hated being babied. It was not like he could help himself.
"You sure you can fight? You can stay here if you want," he told her, concerned.
Steve only had eyes for her. He had to ignore the curious looks of the others. They were just as interested to see what would happen. They knew what their history was.
"Yea, as if. Vision got stabbed, and no one asked him if he was okay," she mumbled and shifted her weight on the right foot.
Steve chuckled at her fury. He knew she was in pain and that her jokes and certainty should cover that. She hated feeling useless, and she was sure as hell not going to let him bench her. She never did. Some things didn't change over the last few years. But he needed to try. She was not okay. Not okay at all, and Steve finally noticed how tired she looked.
"Yea, but Vision is made of Vibranium (Y/N)," Sam pointed out.
She turned to him, angry. The Falcon ducked his head. Regretting even saying a word.
"Shut up," she rolled her eyes.
Sam and Steve shared a worried look, and then Steve gave him a short, subtle nod. Sam had noticed it too. Steve needed to talk to (Y/N). Just to get some things out of the way. Maybe even ask her if she would sit this one out.
"I'm gonna call ahead and tell the king, Natasha and Wanda can you get the jet ready. And Rhodey gear up. Oh, and get that Hulk buster armour ready for Bruce if our green friend really doesn't wanna show up," his right-hand man said.
The team was out of the room a split second later. A weight was lifted from Cap's shoulder. This was their time to talk. Or not. He didn't want her to punch him in the face. She did that before when he tried confessing his feelings.
"I am fine, Steve," she mumbled angrily and stepped away.
She avoided his eyes. Her mood had changed, and he felt like the (Y/N) that hugged him before was gone. Maybe part of their conversation early struck a nerve with her. Or she was just annoyed that he worried about her.
"I just need some of that magic juice called Adrenaline, and I can fight like always," she explained.
Her smile seemed forced. And Steve tilted his head to the side, trying to figure her out. Why was she putting a distance between them? There was some unresolved anger she had. He knew her just hugging him and welcoming him back was too good to be true.
"But you don't have to, you know. I just don't want you getting hurt when we have to fight off an Alien army," he explained slowly.
He tried a reasonable way, but she just laughed humourlessly. Oh, he did strike a nerve. He needed her to tell him what was wrong with her. He did assume it was his return that pissed her off more than she had led on.
"Steve, this is my job. And it's not like I had time to lay low and have a spa day over the last years," she mumbled and grabbed her batons from the table.
Steve stepped closer to her again, cautiously. He watched how she put them back into her tactical belt. He didn't really understand what she meant and why she sounded so strained when she said that. But he realised that this was because of him.
"What is that supposed to mean?"
She spun around and raised her eyebrows at him. She looked like she couldn't believe he didn't know. Her expression turned cruel, and Steve was afraid of what was coming next.
"Steve, when you left the team, everyone left. Sam, Natasha, Wanda and you were off doing your secret Avengers stuff. Clint was with his family. You pulled him from retirement, and he hated Tony for what he did to them. That he let them take you guys. We couldn't reach Thor or Bruce because they were somewhere in space or whatever. And Vision? He hated being here. He just came here because he needed Tony and Bruce to update his systems," she sounded hysteric.
She was alone. He was very selfish last year. And rather concerned about himself.
"And who did that leave? Us. It was just Rhodey, Tony and me. The only people left to defend the world. Tony went as far as wanting to recruit a kid, and Rhody still had to deal with the fact that he couldn't walk. I've never witnessed the kind of pain I saw in his eyes," she explained with another humourless laugh.
"And what did you do? Oh, you were kicking some ass underground. You never felt like calling. I mean, I was worried, but it was not like you cared," she rambled on.
She seemed to have worked herself up. Only now, Steve realised that he did leave the world in their hands. But he did that because he knew he could. Because there was no one better for the job than Tony and her. The Avengers went from about ten members to three.
He stepped even closer to her. The need to comfort her was nagging at his heart.
"But that isn't the only thing is it?" he asked softly.
He was desperate to know what really caused her pain. He knew there was more. And as scared as he was of the answer, he also knew that he needed to know. She gave him a long look with a sad smile.
"I was hurt or still am. Because you came back for everyone. You even gave Tony a stupid phone that he could call you if he needed you, but not me. You never gave me anything. You just left me here. And then you walked in here, and I was so happy to see you alive that for just one moment, I forgot. I forgot how angry I am at you," she mumbled, her eyes focused on his chest.
She was right. Steve never did. Not because he didn't want to, but because he didn't want to jeopardise her safety. Steve was a mess of a man. He was a criminal, and she wasn't, and he wanted it to remain that way. Cap wanted her to stay safe. So she wouldn't have to make hard decisions like he had to. But there it was. Cap wanted her to tell him more, all about her pain. So he could take it away from her. So he could mend her broken heart. But she didn't seem to want to elaborate because she took a step back and her face went stoic again.
"You know that doesn't matter now. We don't have time for this. We need to save the world...again," (Y/N) said with a fake cheer in her voice.
Steve shook his head at her, and he couldn't help letting a small smile slip past his lips. She turned to the door and took a step in its direction, but Steve wasn't having that. He grabbed her arm and spun her back around. And it felt like an electric pulse went through him. The shock was written on her face, but Steve just pressed his lips together and looked at her.
"Well, then we'll make time," he mumbled.
He was done waiting and hurting her. And he knew he could never explain to her why he left. And maybe it didn't even matter anymore; they both knew his mistake. (Y/N) didn't move a muscle as he grabbed her hand and tugged at it.
"You know. I have thought about this hard. Us meeting again. And in my head, this went very differently," he mumbled and tugged again, a bit more forceful.
She stumbled closer to him. Her hands were placed on his chest so she wouldn't crash into him with full force. She looked up at him, her face adorably confused. She had a slight blush on her cheek, and Steve could hear her heartbeat pick up its pace. Interesting.
"How did you imagine it," she then whispered.
Her palms on his chest made his heart sink lower, and he felt like he was about to melt at her stare. Oh, how she could still touch his heart.
"There was a lot more hugging and touching involved in my scenario," he mumbled.
Old Steve would have never been able to say something like that. But this Steve did. He had seen too much and felt too much.
"Steve," she whispered softly.
He would fight any army to hear her say his name like this. She sounded like she was scared of what he would do next.
"You know, there wasn't really a day I didn't think of you. And where I regretted not telling you this major thing, I really should have told you."
She seemed confused by the sudden change in mood. But Steve thought maybe this was the only way to do it. Just tell her. He knew she loved him too now. When she looked at Steve so sad that he left her, he knew. He realised that her feelings were still the same, just like his. So he could tell her, right? He had nothing to lose. The chance that they would survive this battle wasn't big. He would do everything so she would survive, but he needed to tell her before that. He didn't know how tomorrow would look.
"What thing?" she asked him.
He could barely form a thought when her hands moved from his chest around his neck. She started to play with his hair at the nape of his neck. And he was sure she knew. She knew exactly what he wanted to say.
"That I am in love with you," he said casually.
Inside he was shaking. He said it. There was no coming back from that. But the moment he spoke the words, (Y/N) smiled brightly.
"Interesting. I was just about to tell you the same thing," she played it cool, "Cap."
Steve was done playing this game as soon as he heard her say his nickname. He grabbed her around the waist, pulled her closer and placed his lips on hers. He would have done it softly at first, but (Y/N) just pulled him closer the moment they touched. He laughed into the kiss at her eagerness. And he just thought how good this felt. And then he asked himself why he was so stupid to not do this earlier. This was his girl. She always was in some weird way. They were always meant to end up like this. It just took them very long to actually do this.
"About damn time," Sam said suddenly to their right, "Nat pay up. I told you he would do it."
They stopped kissing but didn't let go of each other. Steve pressed his forehead against hers. Squeezing, his eyes closed with embarrassment, and she just giggled. It was like an angelic sound. And he had forgotten how much he loved her laugh.
"Guys, we really have to go by the way," Sam then said to them and stepped out of the room again, "Nat, seriously, you should have seen this."
Of course, they would be interrupted. But sadly, Sam was right. They had their moment. The world needed to be saved now. (Y/N) laughed at the ridiculousness of her friends. And Steve thought maybe it was like old times. Just better. He pecked her lips and then let go of her.
"C'mon, let's go fight some Aliens," he said and grabbed her hand.
Their fingers intertwined, and he never wanted to let her go. He had entirely given up on benching her. He would have to have an eye on his girl, but she was right. No one had gone easy on her the last year, and he wasn't about to start either.
It's 0:36 am and I'm thinking about the fact that I'm at a point in my life where nothing is happening. I finished school and have no plans or ideas for my future which kinda scares me. I spend my days at home doing nothing and I'm okay with it but on the other hand id love to have some kind of purpose or Sth to do idk :/
This is literally my life atm as well! I’m going to university next year (Somewhat exciting, mostly nervous as hell??) and I’m going into arts so I can decide what I want a bit later.
If you’re not going to school next year, have you looked at maybe job shadowing at a few places you have a slight interest in to see if might be something you want to do? Even a not so exciting job can make you feel like you have a more defined schedule which is nice?
Volunteering is also really fun! I looked after some sick kittens for a few weeks with my local cat rescue, but other organizations are always looking for short term help! Also, cliche as it may seem, creative projects can be a great distraction too, such as changing up your room, or writing down a few stories from your life, improving on drawing, making a short film on being your age in your city...its all cool stuff to get active and creative!
avenngers replied to your post: i’m gonna be flying all day tomorrow w...
Good luck! Don’t give up just yet.. I’m flying in 2 hours and I’m still hoping to meet someone famous (in Berlin so probably not.. Hugh dancy I’m looking at you!)
good luck to you too!! honestly you probably have more of a shot than i do because im flying out of a tiny airport in a small town that nobody lives in so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
omg I read your description and stopped after the first half like: okay ive read this a 100 times before and almost missed the best part :D omg I dont even ship wincest haha but a+ description! :D
aawww hahha thank you, i was rather proud of it! <33
